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Venting thread

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Jun 8, 2008
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42,084
Same! And I mean it this way—we can’t control others but we can control how we react. At least you can spot a maskhole a mile away and avoid them, but don’t work yourself up unnecessarily—that can take a toll on you @missy! I’d rather come across a maskhole than a drunk driver or texter and driver—those you don’t see coming and you can’t avoid! But most people can spot these and just walk away, so in the end, they are only potentially hurting themselves. Don’t even sweat it or let it consume you. People jeopardize others every second of the day so In the hierarchy of crimes, maskholes are not high on my radar. I’d panic if I would see someone waving a gun in the air—not wearing a mask properly, not so much.
I was not worked up. However, I was feeling bad for the Costco employees. They were clearly frustrated. And it made me feel better to take a photo of the mask hole with her looking right at me. As @telephone89 wisely wrote, there is no assumption of privacy in public anymore. One would do well to remember that and act accordingly IMO.

And I will take more photos of other mask holes if I so choose. It is my prerogative. I hope this does not come off as rude but I do appreciate the saying "You do you" and I will do me and it is OK if we don't agree. :)

And FWIW if someone has Covid 19 and they are in a store not wearing their masks it can be analogous to waving a gun around. To use your example. Not literally of course but figuratively and the results can be similar. Covid can and does kill innocent people every single day. We cannot control anything but our behavior that is true. But if people would just wear their masks properly when out in public it would be helping all around them and those who are around those people and so on and so forth. It is a domino effect and it starts with you. (Not you specifically though that applies but I am referring to the general you). If everyone would behave responsibly we can get through Covid more quickly and more safely. JMO.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Grocery shopping here in my neck of the US. They are hoarding again. I noticed that chicken, beef, toilet paper, paper towels, rice, and bottled water are getting snapped up. Shelves 1/2 or 1/4 full today. For many people Friday is payday and I think this weekend we will see more hoarding here. The clerk at the pet store told me they are seeing it too. She said one lady stocked up on $500 of cat food.
That's a lot of cat food. During March/April/May Costco was (maybe they still are I didn't notice) limiting the amount of cat food one could purchase. It was hard for us because we feed many ferals in addition to our 4 rescues. So we go through lots of cat food weekly. Way more than the average family does. But fortunately I was able to get sufficient cat food for everyone because I ordered from Chewy as well as Costco and we were able to feed all of the cats during the roughest months. I hope we don't go back to limited supplies of everything we had trouble getting back in March. I guess it is inevitable though given that it is ramping up again everywhere at least in the USA.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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42,084
@missy I‘m so sorry you and Greg are getting frustrated with the doctors. I would call every day...
As for the biopsies for Melanoma. I hope the derm is just being extra cautious. After I had my melanoma...the derm took everything off...I don’t have many spots left..and I had lots...Nothing came back cancerous since the first one. I hope that’s the same for Greg..❤
Thanks Joanne. We have been dealing with this now for 9 plus years and Greg has been getting checked every 3 months plus yearly Molesafe so hopefully it is benign but if not hopefully it is caught super early. I am worried with Covid ramping up it might be challenging getting a surgery scheduled need be. But one day at a time. It's not our first time at this rodeo and it is good to remind ourselves of that. When we/I look too far ahead things can feel overwhelming. One day at a time is the best way. Now just hoping we don't lose power again. Last night we lost it briefly (generator went on thankfully) and the winds and rain are not letting up here so we are likely to lose it again. When we lose power internet goes out and even when the generator comes on internet doesn't come back. I love internet as many of us so hoping if we lose it again it won't be for too long. But I digress. Thank you for your well wishes an glad you haven't had another bout with melanoma. And may it stay that way. Hugs.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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42,084
My husband's boss was just made redundant to save on expenses, despite the company claiming they are actively hiring. Yeah. Right.

I expect the end result will be that much more of the work will fall to my husband without any sort of raise or promotion. DH already puts his heart and soul into his work, regularly working nights and weekends to get everything done.

We are both counting ourselves lucky that we still have jobs. Any day we don't get laid off is a good day. High bar, huh?
Yeah, that is true. All good things are still good things and having one's job right now is a big plus. It's scary thinking one's job can be taken away and I still remember the recession of 2008 very very clearly. I remember the feeling in the pit of my stomach as we navigated those challenging times. So hold on and hang in there and we will get through this and hopefully as intact as possible financially and healthwise. Sending good wishes your way.
 

mrs-b

Ideal_Rock
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Aug 18, 2013
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I'm sorry @mrs-b. To be dealing with the pandemic and health issues and missing dear friends-it's all too much. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers and always sending healing vibes your way. As for the computer that's an easier fix. Maybe it is time to get a new one. You deserve it. Something you can control. (((HUGS))).
@missy -

You're quite right. Tim walked in yesterday and said - "Is it time for a new computer?" I think I'm sulking. I just don't *want* to spend another thousand bucks just before Christmas, y'know? This built-in obsolescence sends me beserko! Even tho I realized at the time that Tim was offering me one for Christmas...I opted for the cashmere sweaters / new chest of drawers / one more diamond for my upcoming eternity band option. Plus a good sulk. :mrgreen:

This pandemic is so difficult for those of us whose families are in other countries. There's no mask I can wear, no amount of sanitizing I can do, to allow me to see the people I love. I spend my life missing specific people, but Australia has simply closed its borders - and, consequently - almost has this thing under control. Yesterday they had 14 new cases, nation-wide. The US had over 70,000. It's pretty obvious, too, that when Australia DOES open its borders, opening them to the US will not be at the top of its 'to-do' list. So all that equates to 2 years of not being able to go home or see my family or my closest friends. And frankly, living in the US away from home for so long has only been possible for me because of the constant treks the people who love me have been willing to make every year. But now, Tim's parents are in their 80's, and we're talking about seeing them 'in 18 months...maybe." Eighteen months is a long time for an 85 year old and we'e aware that we may never see them again. And THAT is a very bitter pill to swallow.

It's been tough, too, being unwell and not being able to see my best friend - who is my best friend, my sister and my family all rolled into one. We've been family to each other for over 40 years. Together we've buried all 4 of our parents, Tim has walked her down the aisle, I was in the room when she had her children, she bought us our first house, we put her kids through private school....the list is endless. When I had afib, and couldn't get my heart's rhythm under control, I would call Wendy, and we'd have a long chat on the phone. Eventually, I'd find myself chatting and laughing...and suddenly it would click back into sinus rhythm. She's like my secret weapon. Were she here, she'd have turned up for every one of my surgeries, and just helped, helped, helped during what has been an incredibly difficult time for me personally. When I had the stent put into my carotid artery, they did a newer procedure called a T-Car procedure which runs the blood outside the body while you're on the table and filters it for clots. They pulled 2 clots out of my blood - both of which would have caused me a stroke had they not been caught. That's way to close to disaster for me, and the idea that I might have 'popped off' without seeing the people I love is just so sad.

And so I suppose *this* is my rant. And my major pity party. I have a good life and I'm very blessed. But its success is predicated on free and open travel between US states (CA and MA specifically) and 2 countries. I know we're all feeling isolated at the moment, and my thoughts and sympathies go out to all those who are doing it tough right now - particularly the elderly who are marooned in residential care facilities, away from the people they love. The stories coming out of those places about people just withering away through sadness are horrific. Damn this pandemic. Damn it to hell.

ETA But I will take that virtual hug, @missy, and raise you a big smile, a wave and a socially distanced cup of coffee - WITH a side slice of cake! :)) Mwah! :wavey:
 
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missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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@missy -

You're quite right. Tim walked in yesterday and said - "Is it time for a new computer?" I think I'm sulking. I just don't *want* to spend another thousand bucks just before Christmas, y'know? This built-in obsolescence sends me beserko! Even tho I realized at the time that Tim was offering me one for Christmas...I opted for the cashmere sweaters / new chest of drawers / one more diamond for my upcoming eternity band option. Plus a good sulk. :mrgreen:

This pandemic is so difficult for those of us whose families are in other countries. There's no mask I can wear, no amount of sanitizing I can do, to allow me to see the people I love. I spend my life missing specific people, but Australia has simply closed its borders - and, consequently - almost has this thing under control. Yesterday they had 14 new cases, nation-wide. The US had over 70,000. It's pretty obvious, too, that when Australia DOES open its borders, opening them to the US will not be at the top of its 'to-do' list. So all that equates to 2 years of not being able to go home or see my family or my closest friends. And frankly, living in the US away from home for so long has only been possible for me because of the constant treks the people who love me have been willing to make every year. But now, Tim's parents are in their 80's, and we're talking about seeing them 'in 18 months...maybe." Eighteen months is a long time for an 85 year old and we'e aware that we may never see them again. And THAT is a very bitter pill to swallow.

It's been tough, too, being unwell and not being able to see my best friend - who is my best friend, my sister and my family all rolled into one. We've been family to each other for over 40 years. Together we've buried all 4 of our parents, Tim has walked her down the aisle, I was in the room when she had her children, she bought us our first house, we put her kids through private school....the list is endless. When I had afib, and couldn't get my heart's rhythm under control, I would call Wendy, and we'd have a long chat on the phone. Eventually, I'd find myself chatting and laughing...and suddenly it would click back into sinus rhythm. She's like my secret weapon. Were she here, she'd have turned up for every one of my surgeries, and just helped, helped, helped during what has been an incredibly difficult time for me personally. When I had the stent put into my carotid artery, they did a newer procedure called a T-Car procedure which runs the blood outside the body while you're on the table and filters it for clots. They pulled 2 clots out ofo my blood - both of which would have caused me a stroke had they not been caught. That's way to close to disaster for me, and the idea that I might have 'popped off' without seeing the people I love is just so sad.

And so I suppose *this* is my rant. And my major pity party. I have a good life and I'm very blessed. But its success is predicated on free and open travel between US states (CA and MA specifically) and 2 countries. I know we're all feeling isolated at the moment, and my thoughts and sympathies go out to all those who are doing it tough right now - particularly the elderly who are marooned in residential care facilities, away from the people they love. The stories coming out of those places about people just withering away through sadness are horrific. Damn this pandemic. Damn it to hell.

ETA But I will take that virtual hug, @missy, and raise you a big smile, a wave and a socially distanced cup of coffee - WITH a side slice of cake! :)) Wwah! :wavey:
It's so hard @mrs-b. I am so sorry :(
I am keeping you in my thoughts and my prayers and always sending you lots of healing vibes and hugs. There is no shortage of (virtual) hugs and never will be. That I am sure of and I hope you can feel the positive energy and the hugs being sent from me to you. (((HUGS))).

And did you say coffee and cake?
There is no one I would rather enjoy this with than you. <3

coffeeandcake.jpg
 

mrs-b

Ideal_Rock
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Aug 18, 2013
Messages
7,977
It's so hard @mrs-b. I am so sorry :(
I am keeping you in my thoughts and my prayers and always sending you lots of healing vibes and hugs. There is no shortage of (virtual) hugs and never will be. That I am sure of and I hope you can feel the positive energy and the hugs being sent from me to you. (((HUGS))).

And did you say coffee and cake?
There is no one I would rather enjoy this with than you. <3

coffeeandcake.jpg
I don't know what that lump of chocolatey goodness is in that photo, but I DEFINITELY want it.

@missy - promise me that when this shit-show is over, we'll get together in NY for a girly meet-up. It's looking forward to those sorts of things that is keeping me sane these days. And please tell Greg - he'll be on cookie duty! Because, be DAMNED if I'm driving down from MA and not getting a Greg-baked special!!

And proceed with caution, because I'm not kidding. Seriously.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Jun 8, 2008
Messages
42,084
I don't know what that lump of chocolatey goodness is in that photo, but I DEFINITELY want it.

@missy - promise me that when this shit-show is over, we'll get together in NY for a girly meet-up. It's looking forward to those sorts of things that is keeping me sane these days. And please tell Greg - he'll be on cookie duty! Because, be DAMNED if I'm driving down from MA and not getting a Greg-baked special!!

And proceed with caution, because I'm not kidding. Seriously.
I promise!
 

nala

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 23, 2011
Messages
4,933
I was not worked up. However, I was feeling bad for the Costco employees. They were clearly frustrated. And it made me feel better to take a photo of the mask hole with her looking right at me. As @telephone89 wisely wrote, there is no assumption of privacy in public anymore. One would do well to remember that and act accordingly IMO.

And I will take more photos of other mask holes if I so choose. It is my prerogative. I hope this does not come off as rude but I do appreciate the saying "You do you" and I will do me and it is OK if we don't agree. :)

And FWIW if someone has Covid 19 and they are in a store not wearing their masks it can be analogous to waving a gun around. To use your example. Not literally of course but figuratively and the results can be similar. Covid can and does kill innocent people every single day. We cannot control anything but our behavior that is true. But if people would just wear their masks properly when out in public it would be helping all around them and those who are around those people and so on and so forth. It is a domino effect and it starts with you. (Not you specifically though that applies but I am referring to the general you). If everyone would behave responsibly we can get through Covid more quickly and more safely. JMO.
Of course we can agree to disagree, just giving you my perspective that really comes from a place of good. We live in a hyper reactive world and Taking pics or filming people is risky. If those maskholes are crazy enough not to wear masks in this pandemic, you don’t know what they are capable of doing to you —they might come after you, etc. As a person who was raised in rough streets, and witnessed imminent danger, Ive learned to avoid certain situations not because I‘M apathetic but bc I want to survive. But ymmv. Just be careful out there.
 

missy

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Messages
42,084
Of course we can agree to disagree, just giving you my perspective that really comes from a place of good. We live in a hyper reactive world and Taking pics or filming people is risky. If those maskholes are crazy enough not to wear masks in this pandemic, you don’t know what they are capable of doing to you —they might come after you, etc. As a person who was raised in rough streets, and witnessed eminent danger, Ive learned to avoid certain situations not because I‘M apathetic but bc I want to survive. But ymmv. Just be careful out there.
Thanks @nala. I appreciate that.

Sometimes writing doesn’t convey how I’m feeling. When I read your post I did appreciate you sharing your thoughts with me though I knew what I was doing. And you’re right. If I take photo of someone who has issues there could be trouble. I’m pretty intuitive so felt safe taking that photo.

I wish I was the King. :)
Then we’d be free of this pandemic sooner lol.


3CE25198-DBDF-4014-B2BA-3316A47F22B0.jpeg
 

Polished

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Messages
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On a Thursday afternoon my brother and I do a fruit and veg market shop. We happened to be going through the check out at the same time. I placed my raspberries and blackberries on the counter, they were flat but slightly towards the edge of the counter. The cashier went to grab them but instead flicked them causing them to fall and spill everywhere. She then proceeded to tell me that it was where I had placed them that caused her to flick them and that I wasn't to do that and, not only that, but started to shout out to everyone at the market that "I think I'm right, it made me flick them and how I'd cost the markets money" etc etc. Meanwhile it gets bizarre, the checkout at the other aisle was telling my brother she could tell "he was a man of breeding". We walked our dogs out in the country later on and it felt good to get away from people.
 

Cozystitches

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Ok.....so this assignment was difficult. I knew that after the first class started working together on it. So I extended the due date AND had the kids work on it in groups again AND gave a sheet of hints. And yet, the emails of "I don't get it" and "This is hard/confusing" are coming it. Yeah, I know. Remember during class when I said you should be TALKING WITH YOUR GROUP AND ASK QUESTIONS. Yeah THAT WAS THE F$%#$^#%^# time to do it! I'm so annoyed.

AND this assignment is literally based on their lab and lecture. Like literally. And the Assignment has EXACTLY THE SAME QUESTIONS.:x2:angryfire::angryfire::angryfire:
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Ok.....so this assignment was difficult. I knew that after the first class started working together on it. So I extended the due date AND had the kids work on it in groups again AND gave a sheet of hints. And yet, the emails of "I don't get it" and "This is hard/confusing" are coming it. Yeah, I know. Remember during class when I said you should be TALKING WITH YOUR GROUP AND ASK QUESTIONS. Yeah THAT WAS THE F$%#$^#%^# time to do it! I'm so annoyed.

AND this assignment is literally based on their lab and lecture. Like literally. And the Assignment has EXACTLY THE SAME QUESTIONS.:x2:angryfire::angryfire::angryfire:
You are doing the best you can do and you are doing a great job with the kids. Now it is up to them. You are doing all you can. They have to step up and take responsibility for the rest. The more they act like they cannot do it the easier it is for them to believe that. The best thing you can do is teach and guide and help and the rest is up to them. Thanks for being a great teacher to the kids. They are our future and they have to step up to the plate and help themselves at some point.
 

missy

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42,084
On a Thursday afternoon my brother and I do a fruit and veg market shop. We happened to be going through the check out at the same time. I placed my raspberries and blackberries on the counter, they were flat but slightly towards the edge of the counter. The cashier went to grab them but instead flicked them causing them to fall and spill everywhere. She then proceeded to tell me that it was where I had placed them that caused her to flick them and that I wasn't to do that and, not only that, but started to shout out to everyone at the market that "I think I'm right, it made me flick them and how I'd cost the markets money" etc etc. Meanwhile it gets bizarre, the checkout at the other aisle was telling my brother she could tell "he was a man of breeding". We walked our dogs out in the country later on and it felt good to get away from people.
Oh my goodness. I think 2020 is taking its toll on some people's sanity. Or perhaps they weren't that sane to begin with but oy. Yeah it is a good feeling to get away from people and just breathe and walk in nature.
 

Polished

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Cozystitches, I know my daughter (who is an English Lit. teacher down in Melbourne) has been having her trials and tribulations with her students this year with online, classroom, back on line again depending on the lockdown situation. She got one reply from a student, when teaching online, which read, "Thanks Miss. Great help". She was wondering whether it was sarcasm!
 

kipari

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Struggling to keep positive... Have been I tears several times this week.
First time in my life I feel defeated.


The new lockdown (no dramatic changes for us personally, we were very very careful beforehand) is feeling senseless when I consider how people seem to actively seek out trouble (protesting the safety measures , mask-hole behavior)...

The latest terrorist attacks in France don't help. It hasn't gotten any coverage here on PS, but a philosophy teacher



Attention , traumatizing content ahead






was beheaded in the street for holding a free speech class two weeks ago. There's more details, I don't want to incite a political discussion. He was a very much loved &respectrd teacher and it all happened less than 45 mins from us.

Three people were stabbed to death Tuesday in a church in the South of France. One 1 of them an acquaintance of my MIL. A young mom of three who went into the church for a silent prayer during some errands. Gone.

Several acquaintances of ours or friend's family members on ventilators. All young (under 50).

Don't even want to write about the economy. Several friends laid off / not working...
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Jun 8, 2008
Messages
42,084
Struggling to keep positive... Have been I tears several times this week.
First time in my life I feel defeated.


The new lockdown (no dramatic changes for us personally, we were very very careful beforehand) is feeling senseless when I consider how people seem to actively seek out trouble (protesting the safety measures , mask-hole behavior)...

The latest terrorist attacks in France don't help. It hasn't gotten any coverage here on PS, but a philosophy teacher



Attention , traumatizing content ahead






was beheaded in the street for holding a free speech class two weeks ago. There's more details, I don't want to incite a political discussion. He was a very much loved &respectrd teacher and it all happened less than 45 mins from us.

Three people were stabbed to death Tuesday in a church in the South of France. One 1 of them an acquaintance of my MIL. A young mom of three who went into the church for a silent prayer during some errands. Gone.

Several acquaintances of ours or friend's family members on ventilators. All young (under 50).

Don't even want to write about the economy. Several friends laid off / not working...
I am so sorry. There are no words to express how one feels about the horror of it all. Sending you big hugs and much love across the miles. Stay safe dear @kipari.

We’re gearing up here for riots next week. It’s scary.

Everyone remain safe.
 

PreRaphaelite

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Messages
2,878
I don't want to vent about serious stuff; it's more beneficial for me to bury my head in a pillow and indulge in a loud scream when necessary. I will vent, however, about white paint. I wanted to paint the entire interior of my home white. How hard can that be? Impossible it seems. There are a gazillion shades of white each with a gazillion shades of undertone nuances. I've learned that paint color needs to be matched not only to interior decor colors but also to the fixed elements room such as flooring, fireplace, cabinets.

Bright whites don't brighten dark rooms and, in fact, can make dark rooms look darker and depending on the shade of white and the way the light enters the room, a bright white can make the room look as though it's painted more than one color.

My interior decorator says she has her "go to" white that she uses all the time. I saw a video by a certified color consultant who said if someone tells you she has a "go to white", that person doesn't know how to use whites.

(pause for sip of vodka tonic)

I don't want to do the usual buying of 50 color samples to schmear on the walls and then meditate over them and make burnt offerings to the gods for help making the right choice.

My interior designer sent me to a color consultant at Sherwin-Williams. I took flooring and fabric samples. She was useless. Showed me a white paint and said "Do you know XX (uber rich person who lives in a 10,000 sq ft mansion 15 min. away from me), well he paints all of his homes this color." Riiiiight, so happy I didn't have to pay for that bit of useless drivel.

(pause for large gulp of vodka tonic)

I returned to watching videos of a Canadian color consultant who compares and contrasts hundreds of paints between and among Sherwin Williams, Benjamin Moore, and Farrow and Ball and talks about undertones and why they will and wont work in certain situations.

He offers color consultation packages one of which I'll probably pay for all because white isn't white isn't white.

(concludes with large bite of chocolate bar and chugging rest of vodka tonic)
Oh, honey. You need Laurel Bern.


 
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kipari

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I am so sorry. There are no words to express how one feels about the horror of it all. Sending you big hugs and much love across the miles. Stay safe dear @kipari.

We’re gearing up here for riots next week. It’s scary.

Everyone remain safe.
((Hugs)) @missy, and thank you❤

I'm worried for you and hope you won't need any of your precautions. Please stay safe.

It's wise to be prepared. I would never have dreamed of a situation where I'd be saying this to a friend in the US. This is the land of the free.
But three of my good friends from California relocated to Israel until March.
Everything is so unreal.
 

Cozystitches

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You are doing the best you can do and you are doing a great job with the kids. Now it is up to them. You are doing all you can. They have to step up and take responsibility for the rest. The more they act like they cannot do it the easier it is for them to believe that. The best thing you can do is teach and guide and help and the rest is up to them. Thanks for being a great teacher to the kids. They are our future and they have to step up to the plate and help themselves at some point.
Thanks Missy. It's hard because so many parents don't hold their kids accountable. Sigh. My goal for this weekend is to avoid my email...
 

canuk-gal

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HI:

@kipari of the news you wrote--it was one of the reasons I lit a candle for you (your country the families who lost loved ones so traumatically) last week. I didn't mention it, but it was on my mind and in my heart.

kind regards--Sharon
 

kipari

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HI:

@kipari of the news you wrote--it was one of the reasons I lit a candle for you (your country the families who lost loved ones so traumatically) last week. I didn't mention it, but it was on my mind and in my heart.

kind regards--Sharon
Thank you Sharon ❤ ❤ ❤
 

Matata

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7,458
Oh, honey. You need Laurel Bern.
Thanks for posting that info. She recommends several that appear on other sites. I went to the paint store this morning and bought samples of Swiss Coffee, White Dove, Simply White, White Cloud and Cotton Balls, painted sample boards and I'm now moving them around the house to see which one performs well in both low light and bright light.
 

MamaBee

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@kipari This had been a nightmare. I’m so sorry...I wish I could give you a hug. I think we all need a hug right now.
 

MamaBee

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Thanks for posting that info. She recommends several that appear on other sites. I went to the paint store this morning and bought samples of Swiss Coffee, White Dove, Simply White, White Cloud and Cotton Balls, painted sample boards and I'm now moving them around the house to see which one performs well in both low light and bright light.
@Matata I had the same problem when I needed a white paint for my trim in Pa. I went to Benjamin Moore and saw they had a can of paint that just said White...I bought it and was happy as a clam. It was perfect.
 

Matata

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That's amazing @MamaBee. What I'm finding is that there is no one color that looks good in both low and bright light. The samples change dramatically depending on where I put them. I have an open floor plan so I'll feel happy as a clam if I decide on one that is ok everywhere rather than gorgeous in one room and revolting in another. I'm happy I have this dilemma to temporarily take my mind off of all the sadness in the world.
 
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