Updates, anyone?

[Jumpin_Jacks]

Sorry lin, I hear you. The bf and I were committed long ago, but he too felt marriage was the slippery slope into kids and way more responsibility. I told him, we could just be married, the 2 of us for awhile and that's it. It wasn't until maybe 6-8 months ago he was ready, I kinda kept saying oh let's go ring shopping and it went to later, to ok, then a deposit (it's been ready for about a week).

So if you are certain you're compatible, he may just need time, just make sure you're ok with that. We're almost at 5 years and I can't wait to be engaged. At the end of the day, we'll be married, just a matter of time.

 

[antiquesparkler]

LLC and MBKRH,
Those are my thoughts exactly. We have been living together a little over a year and a half and together about 2 and half years. I cant wait to change my name! EEEEEE! Probably because SO's last name goes better with my first name then my current last name does. Not really looking forward to all the paperwork though...

Wakingdreams,
That's too bad about your family. Yeah, I definitely think its hard to vent to your family and close friends about your man because you dont want them to think any differently of him. Especially parents. Give them time. I am sure they will come around when they see over time how amazing he treats their daughter. They probably just really dont want to see you hurt. Poor SO. I had a bad break-up with my daughter's father about 6-7 months prior to dating SO and my parents struggled so much at first to see me in a new relationship. They met SO and thought he was okay but over the last 2 and a half years, he has really proven himself to be a great guy and now they love him. Have you been hurt in the past? They might feel protective of you. Just some thoughts.

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

I wrote that a bit drunk and emotional and closed the tab while it was posting-- kinda hoping it wouldn't post, but didn't care if it did. So here goes:
Why my family does not approve: a) Large age gap- 17 years. b) They see him more of a Mr. Right Now rather than Mr. Right -- because he lives a very social night-lifestyle that I've never particularly been keen on. I'm more of a homebody while he's, quite simply, more fun. They think this will translate into fun for now and unhappy in the future.
While I totally see their point, they'll never know the guts of my relationship. I bitch only about the occasional negative instead of mentioning all the daily positive, so they (my mom) only hears the bad, which is entirely my fault, but I still want her to know that I'm insanely happy with him and truly want it to work out for a very very very very very long time. You know?

No one knows about the ring. I told my mom about the diamond when it was bought in Feb., but she scoffed it off like it was an impulse purchase. Which for a while I thought it was, until he bought the ring and now he talks about proposing all the time. (Side note: I don't think I'll be waiting a year after all!!!)

I'm sorry you are going through this wakingdreams! I hope that once you get engaged, that your parents will see you as a serious couple!

 

[madelise]

Wakingdreams-- I was around the LIW when you had your last saga. You're now 22 and he's almost 40

 

[LibbyLA]

wakingdreams,

Please be careful. It can be really difficult when an extrovert (those who are stimulated by being around people and love to go out and hang out/party with friends) is paired with an introvert (who recharges by staying at home and who gets tired and over-stimulated when around too many people). My fiancé is an introvert (like me) who was married to an extrovert who was 13 years younger. On the weekends, she always wanted to go out and party. He sometimes wanted to stay home and deal with all the chores around the homeplace after working long hours during the week.

One of my students helped me to understand the extrovert/introvert thing when I commented about the song "Good Time." The lyrics talk about a guy who is tired after working all week and all he wants to do is go home, clean up, pick up his gal, and go party. I said that all I'd want to do was stay home and read/watch TV/rest. My student said that for her, going out recharged her batteries and staying home would just leave her feeling tired. At that point, I "got" it.

The age difference may not be a problem, but what are you going to do when he's ready to retire and you are years from being old enough? If you or he are wealthy and your working isn't necessary, it may not matter. However, if you need/want to work and he's retired and wants to party/travel/whatever, that could cause friction.

My ex married a woman in her early 20s. He is 27 years older than she is. I don't know how they are doing, but he's her problem now!

liz

 

[wakingdreams53]

AntiqueSparkler, I haven't particularly been hurt-- not enough for my parents to be weary of guys. They just want me to be happy. We all got to spend some time together yesterday and we all seemed to mesh much better. It's all about time. He has proven himself to be amazing, making my life wonderful, planning trips for us with my sister, he's really great. Not too concerned about immediate family, grandfather is another issue-- he a) thinks he's unattractive and I'm too pretty for him and b) thinks the age gap is a deal breaker. Shame, considering I've always had a great relationship with him and would love to invite him to my wedding... just wouldn't want him to spend the entire time crying...

LoveLikeCrazy, they realized we're a serious couple when we started living together

Madelise, I'm prone to sagas lol. I'm 22 and he'll soon be 39.

LibbyLA, you're right, but his extrovertedness gets my introvert @$$ out and about rather than sulking away. I'm just very low energy and that's more of my problem than being an introvert. I do agree about retirement and all of that, I know we won't be in the same boat at the same time, but we have a business together and are doing everything together now to prepare us for when that time comes.

In less detailed news, I got a ring! Not the engagement ring, but we went to a pretty nice restaurant for brunch and presented me with the turquoise ring he bought for me at the antique show we went to earlier this year. He said a million sweet things and was going to propose, but decided that one ring at a time would be best lol. He's considering a committed to get engaged and married ring, which is big for him and also means I won't be waiting a year! I'm excited to start my life with him and there is so much more positive than negative. I feel so blessed that he chose me

 

[Jumpin_Jacks]

So I said I wan't going to be one of those people that look at the ring before he proposes but it was burning a hole in my brain this past weekend (been about a week since the SO picked it up). So I asked to go see it (it wasn't at his place). I can post pictures if no one judges, lol. I tell myself I won't post in SMTB until I get it for real

 

[antiquesparkler]

Jumpin Jacks,
We would love to see pics! Has he purchased the ring yet or just picked it out? Do you love it? Cant wait to see pictures!

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

We love pics

 

[pandabee]

I AM MOVED IN WITH MR. PANDABEE AS OF YESTERDAY!!!!! I still have some winter clothes and less important things at my parents' but we are settling into our new place nicely. Still have quite a bit of furniture to get but that'll keep us busy for the next few months at least. We are both so excited about life haha. Now I just need that sparkly on my finger!!!!!!!

Side note we are planning a weekend trip to San Francisco in September to watch a football game! Unfortunately it won't be super romantic as a friend of his is coming with us, but I did tell him that we need to visit Lang antiques at least

 

[Chewbacca]

lin_ny, I'm so glad you didn't return with bad news! That all seems very reasonable, can't argue with that! As an aside, do you have any idea how your ring is coming along?

No judgement here, Jumpin_Jacks, post away!

Yay pandabee!

 

[Jumpin_Jacks]

Congrats Pandabee, next step bling!!

Here are my pics. Ring is in possession and paid for by SO, just needs the official proposal. Seeing it eased my mind a bit, I was anxious since I picked the stone and the setting to be custom made. Although the cathedral was a surprise, we just talked about the basic band with the 4 prongs, and I briefly mentioned cathedral with the jeweler. I guess he picked up on that then, the cathedral sides a tad thick on the sides, but I love the overall look and love it more as I look at the pictures.

Center is .77 XXX, I was worried it would be small since I originally wanted something in the 1 carat range. What do you guys think? I'm happy with it

 

[SMC]

Congrats Pandabee, next step bling!!

Here are my pics. Ring is in possession and paid for by SO, just needs the official proposal. Seeing it eased my mind a bit, I was anxious since I picked the stone and the setting to be custom made. Although the cathedral was a surprise, we just talked about the basic band with the 4 prongs, and I briefly mentioned cathedral with the jeweler. I guess he picked up on that then, the cathedral sides a tad thick on the sides, but I love the overall look and love it more as I look at the pictures.

Center is .77 XXX, I was worried it would be small since I originally wanted something in the 1 carat range. What do you guys think? I'm happy with it

Wow, your ring is exquisite. I love the side profile.

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

I love the fire jumpin_jacks!!!!! Beautiful ring!!!!

 

[pandabee]

Thanks ladies! Beautiful ring Jumpin_Jacks!!

 

[antiquesparkler]

Love your ring Jumpin Jacks! Yay! Now the hard part... waiting.

 

[lin_ny]

lin_ny, I'm so glad you didn't return with bad news! That all seems very reasonable, can't argue with that! As an aside, do you have any idea how your ring is coming along?

No judgement here, Jumpin_Jacks, post away!

Yay pandabee!

Ring is apparently done...

He was looking at the completed ring pictures the other day and wanted to ask me what I thought about the chip (the diamond is chipped, and I picked a bezel not only because I love bezels, but to protect it as well). He said the chip is visible (but we have to keep in mind that the pictures are magnified a lot!) and just wanted to clear that with me before he actually purchased the ring. I couldn't really give him an opinion anyway, since I can't see the pictures of it. I just told him - the diamond is chipped and we knew that upon purchase. As long as it's protected, I'm happy. No one will see it at arm's length anyway. And plus, I certainly won't be going around advertising that my diamond is chipped. I almost guarantee no one will notice. No one I know is a diamond expert.

 

[antiquesparkler]

That's exciting Lin_ny! Do you think he will propose soon?

 

[madelise]

Congrats Pandabee! Moving in is so exciting! Will you guys need time to slowly decorate the whole place, or are you already on that? I'm looking at the beautiful bedding sets at Anthropologie and dreaming of having something as beautiful for our future bedroom! Is it okay if a shared couple's bedroom is girly? haha.

Yay JJ, your ring is beautiful! Is your cellphone purple? Lol I see a lot of purple reflections!

Linny, no one will notice that chip at all! But make sure to get that ring insured ASAP, jut in case you hit it hard at just the right spot!

 

[antiquesparkler]

Heck yes you can have a girly shared bedroom! Ours is painted light blue with a tan tufted headboard, sparkly mirror above the bed, chandelier for a light complete with crystals (think shabby chic!) and almost all white bedding... heehehe. Poor SO.

 

[Chewbacca]

Beautiful ring, JJ!

lin_ny, YAY! I can't wait to see that setting with your stone.


THE RING IS IN THE COUNTRY! Now we wait through the customs process.

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

Yay Lin_NY so exciting!! I hope he doesn't make you wait too long for it!

Our bedroom is weird. I would love to girly it up, but I couldn't do it! We have dark wood furniture, and the bed has a brown and teal motif. I love tiffany blue and and it's pretty darn close so I'm ok with it!

PB you are lucky you are kinda starting off together...I moved in with SO and he already had everything so I didn't get to do the fun stuff and pick anything out! I can't wait for a house so I can do that.

 

[Chewbacca]

I wish we had dark wood furniture! I bought all 1960's off-white with gold trim Formica furniture for our house. My love for mid century design isn't going anywhere, but why oh why didn't I pick wood!

I'm s-l-o-w-l-y replacing things. But, !

 

[lin_ny]

antique - ummm nope. but only because we just had this big talk/thing about not getting married this year. so i don't think it's gonna be soon. either way, i know he wants to surprise me huge! i'm trying to put it out of my mind! hanging around LIW isn't necessarily helping.... hahaha.

madelise - i don't think so either. i will definitely have to look into insurance. thank you for reminding me. i actually thought they wouldn't insure it because it's already damaged. i suppose it will all start with getting it appraised??

chewy - me too. i'm really excited. he said its really beautiful. i can't wait to see it. and i MOSTLY can't wait to pick out a wedding band! i think i might look for something vintage! i am so excited to see your ring too... yaaaay!!!

llc - you and me both, sista! i am definitely very excited to see the 18k rose gold. i've never seen 18k in person.

 

[madelise]

Ugh this is the set I really, really want! In cream or white! http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/product/093707.jsp

 

[madelise]

madelise - i don't think so either. i will definitely have to look into insurance. thank you for reminding me. i actually thought they wouldn't insure it because it's already damaged. i suppose it will all start with getting it appraised??

The amount it will be appraised for and insured for will be lower because of the chip. But they'll still insure it. Esp with antique cuts. They almost always have little nibbles and nicks!

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

Ugh this is the set I really, really want! In cream or white! http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/product/093707.jsp

Wow! That is a gorgeous duvet!!!

 

[Jumpin_Jacks]

Congrats Pandabee! Moving in is so exciting! Will you guys need time to slowly decorate the whole place, or are you already on that? I'm looking at the beautiful bedding sets at Anthropologie and dreaming of having something as beautiful for our future bedroom! Is it okay if a shared couple's bedroom is girly? haha.

Yay JJ, your ring is beautiful! Is your cellphone purple? Lol I see a lot of purple reflections!

Linny, no one will notice that chip at all! But make sure to get that ring insured ASAP, jut in case you hit it hard at just the right spot!

Thanks for the comments everyone!

Yes Madelise, my cell phone case is purple, you can see it in the reflection on the profile pic! Ha ha

I'm trying to get around the super girly decor by doing floraly simple like dandelion designs in more muted greys, blues. Here's a shower curtain I got recently
http://www.amazon.com/InterDesign-Thistle-72-Inch-Shower-Curtain/dp/B006J23H5S/ref=sr_1_3?s=home-garden&ie=UTF8&qid=1371604334&sr=1-3&keywords=interdesign+shower+curtain

 

[maple2012]

Congrats Pandabee on moving in!! I remember when my SO and I moved together... it was so exciting and I felt so grown up. Haha.


Ladies my BG reset arrived today. I am a tad disappointed however as my original setting was not sent back. I am praying they didn't scrap the metal accidently. Also, I was expecting the new 2.9mm width would look more substantial than my previous ring... but it doesn't appear any thicker. I'm having them double check to make sure they didn't accidently miss the modification note. On a positive note, I do love the profile of my ring now! Here is a quick glamour picture. Is it just me or does it not seem like the top is 2.9mm?

 

[Jumpin_Jacks]

Maple2012: Was your old ring a knife edge too? I wonder how they measure the mm with a knife edge since some of the width is hidden in the angle?

By the way, it's gorgeous shows off that pretty stone! What are the specs?