Tom & Gisele

[CaseyLouLou]

I’m ashamed but for some reason I am following the latest on this relationship on a daily basis.

We are big Tom Brady fans having lived in Boston for many years when he was just starting out. It helps that he just keeps winning!

And then, of course, he marries a supermodel….my husband laughs at me every time I critique her (jealous much?) But over the years she just got on my nerves the way she hung all over him for every photo op. And at the same time she pushed him to quit the job that he loved.

So I thought it would be fun to discuss how and why this breakup is happening because in some ways it’s not surprising but I’m still a bit in shock. He’s clearly obsessed with football but that’s his thing so I’m not sure how she can tell him to stop.

Anyhoo…. I’m fascinated. I will be sad when he does retire because he’s fun to watch if I have to watch football.

 

[Slickk]

Yeah, I’ve been following and I see your point but have you seen the head injuries just this week in the NFL? Terrible concussions that likely will have lifelong effects on the players (and their loved ones).
I don’t judge her for wanting him to retire. After all, he’s reached the pinnacle of his career already. What more to prove at the risk of such serious injury? Perhaps she doesn’t see herself with a brain damaged husband in the future. Idk. Just thinking aloud.
With that said, I get his side too. It’s sad …

I hope this spoiler works. Here’s one of the awful head injuries this week, it’s pretty hard to watch if sensitive.

Spoiler

https://twitter.com/x/status/1575658747791552512

That reaction is called fencing (I think) and is indicative of concussion.

ETA he also promised her he would retire and reneged on his promise.

 

[CaseyLouLou]

Yeah, I’ve been following and I see your point but have you seen the head injuries just this week in the NFL? Terrible concussions that likely will have lifelong effects on the players (and their loved ones).
I don’t judge her for wanting him to retire. After all, he’s reached the pinnacle of his career already. What more to prove at the risk of such serious injury? Perhaps she doesn’t see herself with a brain damaged husband in the future. Idk. Just thinking aloud.
With that said, I get his side too. It’s sad …

I hope this spoiler works, it’s pretty hard to watch if sensitive.

Spoiler

https://twitter.com/x/status/1575658747791552512

That reaction is called fencing (I think) and is indicative of concussion.

Yes, my kids played football in high school and I wasn’t thrilled. Luckily they weren’t very good and didn’t get much play time.

I totally understand her concern but I get the feeling it has as much to do with all of the time he spends outside of games ‘studying’ football, watching film, etc. She always says she wants him to be more ‘present’ and when he’s home he’s probably still focused on football. I would be annoyed too but he loves it and once he quits that’s it. He has said he loves the camaraderie too so I bet she feels neglected but it’s like telling your husband he can’t see his friends which isn’t going to fly either.

This interview was telling.

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=217329543696768

 

[LilAlex]

And then, of course, he marries a supermodel….my husband laughs at me every time I critique her (jealous much?) But over the years she just got on my nerves the way she hung all over him for every photo op. And at the same time she pushed him to quit the job that he loved.

She is way more successful than he is! And, arguably, more talented. If there is asymmetry in that relationship, it is she who "reached down"! And he's a cheater and an awful human. But he does win a lot! The fact that he wins at entertainment (i.e., NFL) and not something important means the bad far outweighs the good for me. And this is coming from a long-time Boston resident...

 

[Slickk]

Plus he has an extremely lucrative broadcast contract waiting for him so he’s not really leaving football.
Thanks for that interview @CaseyLouLou it was nice to hear her speaking kindly. Her famous words after that loss stick with me! “My husband cannot throw the ball and catch it at the same time!”

https://twitter.com/x/status/1524037398602076162

 

[CaseyLouLou]

She is way more successful than he is! And, arguably, more talented. If there is asymmetry in that relationship, it is she who "reached down"! And he's a cheater and an awful human. But he does win a lot! The fact that he wins at entertainment (i.e., NFL) and not something important means the bad far outweighs the good for me. And this is coming from a long-time Boston resident...

I’m not sure looking pretty while wearing someone else’s clothes is talent but she sure was successful at it.

Do you mean cheater in football or with Brigit. Neither of those is clear to me but for some reason I give him the benefit of the doubt on those. He seems likable but maybe he’s a jerk. I think he and Brigit had already broken up when he found out she was pregnant. Doesn’t seem like he needs to cheat in football but who knows.

ETA he also promised her he would retire and reneged on his promise.

True but I’m not sure she should be asking him to quit something he loves. Can you tell whose side I’m on here?

Not the same thing but for a while I tried to convince my husband to find a better job (because I knew he had more skills than he gave himself credit for) but eventually I realized that he needs to do what he wants and he was comfortable and happy with what he had and wasn’t a risk taker. Change is hard.

 

[Slickk]

I realized that he needs to do what he wants and he was comfortable and happy with what he had and wasn’t a risk taker. Change is hard.

Right, but perhaps Gisele isn’t a risk taker though and doesn’t wish to risk her husband being injured any longer. It will affect her life too.
I get it, he loves it. It’s his life. But sometimes we sacrifice for the better of the family, not to mention his long-term health.
It’s a tough one…

 

[telephone89]

She has spoken publicly about CTE and the dangers, and wanting him to be alive for their kids. She has spoken about having to take a backseat to his career. He has acknowledged that she has given up a lot for him to be able to continue his career. They agreed as a family that he would retire and spend more time with his family, and he reneged on that after less than two months. If he didn't want to retire, he shouldn't have made promises to his family. He is clearly happy playing football, and has chosen that over his family. TBH if I were her I'd be pissed. I'd feel the same if this any other career, especially with potentially fatal side-effects. There is also chatter that theyve been having issues for years, so perhaps this is the proverbial straw. Maybe this divorce will give them both what they need from life. Not every couple is better together.

 

[CaseyLouLou]

She has spoken publicly about CTE and the dangers, and wanting him to be alive for their kids. She has spoken about having to take a backseat to his career. He has acknowledged that she has given up a lot for him to be able to continue his career. They agreed as a family that he would retire and spend more time with his family, and he reneged on that after less than two months. If he didn't want to retire, he shouldn't have made promises to his family. He is clearly happy playing football, and has chosen that over his family. TBH if I were her I'd be pissed. I'd feel the same if this any other career, especially with potentially fatal side-effects. There is also chatter that theyve been having issues for years, so perhaps this is the proverbial straw. Maybe this divorce will give them both what they need from life. Not every couple is better together.

All excellent points. My theory is that he was planning to retire to be an announcer thinking she would be happy with that but she wasn’t happy because that was going to take up a ton of time too with traveling and prepping. So they had a big fight and he decided he might as well play football while he still can if she’s not going to be happy.

Just fun speculation.

 

[MissGotRocks]

They seem to me to be two large egos so not sure how well that fits under one roof. All I know is what is presented, i.e. his numerous interviews and the he/she ones where she always acts like she is trying too hard to me.
On the surface, one more season
Is not that bad. However, he had promised and I think if he had won the Super Bowl, he would have stuck with the promise. There again, the ugly ego raises its head and he wants one more shot to win it with Tampa Bay. I think you need to know when to fold it and walk away in one piece. I can understand her being very upset, particularly with the risk of severe injury. In the games I have seen this year, I think he is being targeted for sacks. If you take him out, the team certainly won’t be as large of a contender. Also, if he takes the Fox News contract, he still won’t be home on Sundays and probably a few days a week. My initial reaction to their situation was ‘is she really going to give up her marriage for a few more months of football?’ but I think it probably goes farther than that too. Football - in one way or another - will probably always be a huge part of his life. She wants her own career and feels unsupported in it and in the child rearing arena. I kinda think they have tried to make it work for as long as they can and now realize it just won’t work any longer for this two career couple. I hope I am wrong as I love happy endings but it is just not looking good.

 

[LilAlex]

Do you mean cheater in football or with Brigit.

Ooh, I hope you are not his defense attorney! "When the DA refers to my client's "cheating," which of his many varieties of cheating is she specifically referencing?"

OK, for the record, I meant his professional cheating. But his amateur cheating isn't exactly a cause for celebration, either. The good news is that neither matters one tiny bit because he is (pre)forgiven forever and ever.

I will say this about models: they put up with a lot of sh*t. I still recall toward the beginning of the internet when a model would post a "I hope you enjoy my fotograf" and all the haters would be like "Stoopid model cant even spell!" And we know that model probably speaks five languages.

 

[CaseyLouLou]

They seem to me to be two large egos so not sure how well that fits under one roof. All I know is what is presented, i.e. his numerous interviews and the he/she ones where she always acts like she is trying too hard to me.
On the surface, one more season
Is not that bad. However, he had promised and I think if he had won the Super Bowl, he would have stuck with the promise. There again, the ugly ego raises its head and he wants one more shot to win it with Tampa Bay. I think you need to know when to fold it and walk away in one piece. I can understand her being very upset, particularly with the risk of severe injury. In the games I have seen this year, I think he is being targeted for sacks. If you take him out, the team certainly won’t be as large of a contender. Also, if he takes the Fox News contract, he still won’t be home on Sundays and probably a few days a week. My initial reaction to their situation was ‘is she really going to give up her marriage for a few more months of football?’ but I think it probably goes farther than that too. Football - in one way or another - will probably always be a huge part of his life. She wants her own career and feels unsupported in it and in the child rearing arena. I kinda think they have tried to make it work for as long as they can and now realize it just won’t work any longer for this two career couple. I hope I am wrong as I love happy endings but it is just not looking good.

All of that makes total sense. I’m leaning towards her career being the biggest issue over the CTE thing. If you love someone so much that you worry about their health, I just can’t understand exiting the relationship altogether. I think she could see that his career was (to him) more important than hers and she resented it. She has said in recent interviews that it is ‘her turn’.

There has to be more to it than his unretirement for sure, otherwise she would have left much sooner. According to the tabloids she has threatened to leave before even several years ago. I think she’s a hothead. As a Brady fan, I feel bad for him. He really seemed to adore her.

 

[MissGotRocks]

All of that makes total sense. I’m leaning towards her career being the biggest issue over the CTE thing. If you love someone so much that you worry about their health, I just can’t understand exiting the relationship altogether. I think she could see that his career was (to him) more important than hers and she resented it. She has said in recent interviews that it is ‘her turn’.

There has to be more to it than his unretirement for sure, otherwise she would have left much sooner. According to the tabloids she has threatened to leave before even several years ago. I think she’s a hothead. As a Brady fan, I feel bad for him. He really seemed to adore her.

The notion that we can have it all is simply a notion. Two high profile careers trying to mesh and raise kids together would be difficult for anyone. Not living with him does not change much for her as she will still need someone around for the kids if she is working. So to your point, it has to be her anger and resentment of him fueling this. I too have read that she has previously left before in anger and returned. No matter how much you love someone, that level of anger and drama would be hard to take.

 

[Gussie]

She has spoken publicly about CTE and the dangers, and wanting him to be alive for their kids. She has spoken about having to take a backseat to his career. He has acknowledged that she has given up a lot for him to be able to continue his career. They agreed as a family that he would retire and spend more time with his family, and he reneged on that after less than two months. If he didn't want to retire, he shouldn't have made promises to his family. He is clearly happy playing football, and has chosen that over his family. TBH if I were her I'd be pissed. I'd feel the same if this any other career, especially with potentially fatal side-effects. There is also chatter that theyve been having issues for years, so perhaps this is the proverbial straw. Maybe this divorce will give them both what they need from life. Not every couple is better together.

I can't say that I disagree with any of this. She loved her career too and was very successful at it. For years she supported him and put her aspirations on the back burner. The career lifetime for a female model is unfortunately shorter than most football players. In Tom Brady's case, way shorter. It's her turn.

 

[autumngems]

She has supported him and did all the child rearing while he "played", he made a promise and should stick to it. I feel for the kids with a dad that's never around and apparently feel playing a game is more important. And the cheating....

 

[telephone89]

I can't say that I disagree with any of this. She loved her career too and was very successful at it. For years she supported him and put her aspirations on the back burner. The career lifetime for a female model is unfortunately shorter than most football players. In Tom Brady's case, way shorter. It's her turn.

Agreed.

The "nagging wife" is such an outdated mysognistic trope, it really pains me to see this brought up in this thread. "She made him quit" no, they made this decision as a family and he couldn't even put his family first for TWO MONTHS. Aint nothing wrong with wanting "her turn" after raising HIS children for over a decade. Now that the kids are a bit older it certainly allows some freedom.

 

[MissGotRocks]

I don’t disagree with his wife. She has a right to be very unhappy with him reneging on his decision. She apparently has left before over other things and returned so he might have thought she was crying wolf again. Apparently not this time. It is not so much a criticism of her and her emotions but rather how they have handled conflict in the past. This issue apparently will not be solved in the same way as it was in the past. I feel bad for the family unit and the kids are caught in the middle. Even if Tom does not continue to play, he apparently will be part of the broadcast crew so his life will still revolve around football. That might be the final dealbreaker for her.

 

[LemonMoonLex]

Agreed.

The "nagging wife" is such an outdated mysognistic trope, it really pains me to see this brought up in this thread. "She made him quit" no, they made this decision as a family and he couldn't even put his family first for TWO MONTHS. Aint nothing wrong with wanting "her turn" after raising HIS children for over a decade. Now that the kids are a bit older it certainly allows some freedom.

+1

I've personally always loved them together & have thought they were really well matched. If anything they seem like the same person to me just one is male and American and the other is female and Brazilian (I believe?).

Both have had amazing longevity at the top of their chosen careers, but I do feel for Gisele in this situation. I can totally understand why she might feel fed up. At the end of the day football is just a game and your family should come first. If he isn't acting as so, and treating it that way for so long....that'd take a toll on any man or woman.

In the end nobody really knows what has been said behind closed doors and I truly dont believe one is the villian or a poc. I know a divorce is going to be extremely hard on their kids and I pray they're able to have some semblance of privacy while they navigate these choppy waters as a family, for their kids sake.

Sad for both of them and I hope they both find what they're looking for.

 

[mrs-b]

All of that makes total sense. I’m leaning towards her career being the biggest issue over the CTE thing. If you love someone so much that you worry about their health, I just can’t understand exiting the relationship altogether. I think she could see that his career was (to him) more important than hers and she resented it. She has said in recent interviews that it is ‘her turn’.

There has to be more to it than his unretirement for sure, otherwise she would have left much sooner. According to the tabloids she has threatened to leave before even several years ago. I think she’s a hothead. As a Brady fan, I feel bad for him. He really seemed to adore her.

He gives me a pain - and I'm a Boston girl, too.

it's a huge assumption to say his career was more important to him than hers was to her. Women are more altruistic than men - having a larger part of their physical brain dedicated to altruism; it's part of biological determinism built into women's physical construction so that they stay committed to their young and ergo advance the species (not that it needs it any more, obviously). But her commitment to family isn't for one second an indication that her career was less important to her than his was to him. I think it's more a case of - someone had to do it, and in the end she took the hit, while he continued to pursue his own fulfillment and fun.

If they had an agreement, and I think the general assumption is that they did, him reneging is unfair to the extreme. And as for 'asking him to give up something he loves' - who cares?? Marriages that work are 100% based on compromise, and the fact that he has played so long is an incredible testament to her willingness to allow him - and even support him - to pursue what he likes best. Average retirement age in the NFL is 27.6 years. Brady is 45. He's looking at playing an extra 18 years over and above the average NFL player - and Giselle has had to put up 13 of those years. Obviously she knew he was playing when she married him, but it wouldn't have been AT ALL unreasonable to think he'd be retired by 40. And the fact that he's still playing at this age is fair testament to the extent both his and his family's lives have 100% orbited around him pursuing a career in the NFL; if he's had this kind of professional longevity, huge sacrifices have to have been made by - not only him, but also the people around him to allow him to do what he loves. Past a point, it's time to stop thinking about yourself and commit to the family who has supported you so much.

And don't even start me on the health risks - spinal and brain, particularly. Is she supposed to support him after he loses mobility or suffers reduced brain function due to a serious concussion? I mean - how sexist do we want to be regarding what we expect from her as opposed to what we expect from him?

 

[Mreader]

I did not read all of the comments but the ire directed towards Gisele really smacks of misogynism. I can completely understand the frustration of somebody whose husband says he’s going to retire and then changes his mind when she has plausibly been responsible for the majority of the child care. But we don’t know anything about the inner workings of their marriage and reasons for separation so it’s all speculation anyway.

 

[Mreader]

Agreed.

The "nagging wife" is such an outdated mysognistic trope, it really pains me to see this brought up in this thread. "She made him quit" no, they made this decision as a family and he couldn't even put his family first for TWO MONTHS. Aint nothing wrong with wanting "her turn" after raising HIS children for over a decade. Now that the kids are a bit older it certainly allows some freedom.

Thank you!!! 100% THIS.

 

[monarch64]

They made a great celebrity pair for people who are into that stuff. If I were her I’d be over it, though. He seems pretty one-dimensional and I’d have been super bored with him by now. Like, what does she really have to look forward to with him in the future? Him announcing, continuing on in the sports world, and playing golf? Blah. He’s a guy that needs milquetoast, and she ain’t milquetoast. I know I sound rather harsh, but I am in former Peyton Manning country and that guy is funny as hell, so my opinion of Brady is he’s a machine and kind of robotic, lacking in personality in comparison. Anyway, all that to say I feel pretty indifferent about them splitting up.

 

[Slickk]

Only a minute to post, but I had the thought that, for goodness sakes, it’s not as if he’s curing cancer or doing important work. He is merely a selfish man too afraid to walk away from the fame and adulation (it’s certainly not the $, that’s covered with the aforementioned broadcast contract). Risking his life/health, marriage and family, after their sacrifices over the years!? Nope nope nope.

 

[monarch64]

I’m not sure looking pretty while wearing someone else’s clothes is talent but she sure was successful at it.

Do you mean cheater in football or with Brigit. Neither of those is clear to me but for some reason I give him the benefit of the doubt on those. He seems likable but maybe he’s a jerk. I think he and Brigit had already broken up when he found out she was pregnant. Doesn’t seem like he needs to cheat in football but who knows.



True but I’m not sure she should be asking him to quit something he loves. Can you tell whose side I’m on here?

Not the same thing but for a while I tried to convince my husband to find a better job (because I knew he had more skills than he gave himself credit for) but eventually I realized that he needs to do what he wants and he was comfortable and happy with what he had and wasn’t a risk taker. Change is hard.

Girl have you not seen The Devil Wears Prada, specifically the scene in which Meryl Streep gives Anne Hathaway the business about the cerulean blue sweater? You are Anne Hathaway here.

 

[CaseyLouLou]

Girl have you not seen The Devil Wears Prada, specifically the scene in which Meryl Streep gives Anne Hathaway the business about the cerulean blue sweater? You are Anne Hathaway here.

Lol. I will have to rewatch that. I don’t remember movies very well for some reason.

it's a huge assumption to say his career was more important to him than hers was to her.

I didn’t phrase that very well - I meant that from her perspective he thought his career was more important than hers (not that she didn’t think hers was important), which does seem to be his opinion based on his actions.

I think the reason I’m siding with Tom a bit is because he probably didn’t get married thinking he would have to stop playing football. I’m probably naive but he seem to enjoy playing and prepping as a personal challenge, not just for the fame and fortune. I can understand that. I can also understand that after all these years she feels that she isn’t important enough to him because of it. He may have promised but didn’t anticipate how hard it would be to leave it behind. I also think if he had gone through with his promise he would have resented her and that wouldn’t end well either. No win situation for either of them.

She always rubbed me the wrong way but I can definitely see her side of this too. It’s unfortunate for everyone. I’m just surprised. It seemed like they were a great family.

This thread is sure getting a lot of discussion which is fun.

 

[Mary Queen of Scotch]

Girl have you not seen The Devil Wears Prada, specifically the scene in which Meryl Streep gives Anne Hathaway the business about the cerulean blue sweater? You are Anne Hathaway here.

Celebrity splits are so not my hill, but something about this thread has been bugging me since I first clicked on it yesterday. I agree with you and some others upthread. @LilAlex @Gussie et al.

Gisele is no slouch. For starters, she is worth almost twice as much as Tom. She was the top-earning model on planet Earth for decades, until Kylie Jenner usurped her (who, if you ask me, should hardly be included in that ranking anyway). Tom is what? The 16th highest paid QB?

Some might wish to write off everyone in her industry as a bimbo clothes hanger, but Gisele is significantly more influential worldwide than Tom (a bimbo ball tosser?). She also seems quite focused on good works and like a more interesting dinner party guest, to boot. Fairly confident Tom is about as riveting a conversationalist as a box of hair.

 

[CaseyLouLou]

Celebrity splits are so not my hill, but something about this thread has been bugging me since I first clicked on it yesterday. I agree with you and some others upthread. @LilAlex @Gussie et al.

Gisele is no slouch. For starters, she is worth almost twice as much as Tom. She was the top-earning model on planet Earth for decades, until Kylie Jenner usurped her (who, if you ask me, should hardly be included in that ranking anyway). Tom is what? The 16th highest paid QB?

Some might wish to write off everyone in her industry as a bimbo clothes hanger, but Gisele is significantly more influential worldwide than Tom (a bimbo ball tosser?). She also seems quite focused on good works and like a more interesting dinner party guest, to boot. Fairly confident Tom is about as riveting a conversationalist as a box of hair.

I feel bad for starting this thread now because of course none of us know either of them and shouldn’t judge. I just always thought they had the perfect marriage and suddenly it seems to be falling apart and I was surprised and kind of interested in the backstory so I wanted to see if anyone else was following it.

Girl have you not seen The Devil Wears Prada, specifically the scene in which Meryl Streep gives Anne Hathaway the business about the cerulean blue sweater? You are Anne Hathaway here

I just watched that scene and I am Anne Hathaway! I have no appreciation for the fashion industry and my wardrobe is boring, other than my jewelry collection of course.

My husband got me into football back in Boston but I agree that some of these comments about their relationship weren’t fair so now I feel bad. I’m done gossiping.

 

[LilAlex]

My husband got me into football back in Boston but I agree that some of these comments about their relationship weren’t fair so now I feel bad. I’m done gossiping.

My feelings evolved on this, too. It is my spouse who really hates Tom Brady.

Life in the public eye is suitable fodder for conversation, imo. And to all of those stars who say "It ain't my job to be a role model!" -- well, I'd say it kind of is.

 

[Mary Queen of Scotch]

I feel bad for starting this thread now because of course none of us know either of them and shouldn’t judge. I just always thought they had the perfect marriage and suddenly it seems to be falling apart and I was surprised and kind of interested in the backstory so I wanted to see if anyone else was following it.



I just watched that scene and I am Anne Hathaway! I have no appreciation for the fashion industry and my wardrobe is boring, other than my jewelry collection of course.

My husband got me into football back in Boston but I agree that some of these comments about their relationship weren’t fair so now I feel bad. I’m done gossiping.

Please don’t feel bad, for Pete’s sake!

1) Benign gossip like this is good fun (quoth the unrepentant yenta @Mary Queen of Scotch ). Of course none of us have an intimate understanding of this couple’s inner lives (what a relief), but they are public figures and you meant no ill will.

2) Oh to be a fly on my wall during the Farve retirement-reversal days (he’s a d*ck with ears but gotta 4give & 4get).

3) Hathaway is quite likeable in that movie. And heavens to Betsy, that outfit she wore with the Chanel thigh high boots! *fetch me my smelling salts.* There are far worse things to be in this world

 

[marymm]

Tom and Gisele are public figures who regular court public attention -- I'm not a football fan in general and not a fan of Tom Brady -- I do have admiration for Gisele and wondered why she chose to marry Tom and assumed it was for love -- relationships are the backbone of human existence and it makes sense that we can become fixated on why some relationships succeed and some fail -- and when young children are involved it is particularly difficult to be spectators to the break-up of a family -- I don't really care if they stay together or decide to divorce, but for the sake of the children I do hope they are able to maintain respectful and courteous public profiles.