Titles on Escort Cards?

[goldenstar]

I'm debating whether or not to use Mr., Mrs., Ms. etc on our escort cards. I am leaning toward no titles at all, just the guest's first and last name. However, I have a few older relatives that are MD's and I really fear they might be offended if I didn't use the title.

What did you do and why?
Could I use titles only for the MDs and not for anyone else?

TIA! I need to get my escort cards done yesterday. Wedding in 5 days...

 

[lliang_chi]

I don''t know your MD friends but will someone really get mad if they don''t have their Dr. title on their escort card? If the answer is yes, then I guess put titles for everyone. I dunno, my hope would be that people don''t care that much... If you want to play it safe then do titles for EVERYONE

Maybe Haven can answer this for you....

 

[goldenstar]

Thanks,

Im not really sure. The 3 MDs I''m thinking of are my mom''s uncles and aunt. They are two generations before me, and admittedly a bit snobish. I can picture them doing a double take at the least, being offended at most. This is based on what I know of them.

I personally don''t mind using a title for those people and not for everyone else. I hope that''s not a huge faux pas.

 

[swingirl]

The older generation does expect to be called by their titles, it''s not snobbish, it''s just they way we were brought up. I would NEVER call my friend''s parents by their first names, it was always Mr and Mrs. and today 40 years later I still would not call my friend''s 80 year old mother by her first name. If it''s a tradition that you know they still keep you should follow it.

If your wedding is formal enough to have escort cards, it''s formal enough to use titles. You aren''t likely to offend anyone by using more formality.

 

[Kelli]

UGH! Those are are the kinds of details that make wedding planning such a hassle! I hadn''t even thought about that yet!

Based on what swingirl said, I''d go ahead and put everyone''s titles on there, just to be safe. I''m sure that''s not what you wanted to hear, but you don''t want to risk offending people.

 

[Winks_Elf]

Um, what''s an escort card?

 

[Kelli]

LOL! I actually don''t know what that is either!

 

[MakingTheGrade]

I wasn't going to do titles, all these people will be family and friends and I thought titles would be too formal, especially because our reception is pretty casual and in a restaurant. (We only have the cards because I think it's less stressful for our friends and families to have assigned seating)

I'll have an MD in another 3 years, I hope I never become someone who's offended when my MD isn't acknowledged at social occasions. My husband is in charge of keeping in grounded, lol.

(I believe escort cards are cards with your guests name, and table numbers. So they know where to sit. For example, in the Friends' episode with Monica's wedding, Ross meets Mona at the escort card table)

 

[goldenstar]

Date: 4/20/2009 1:07:46 PM
Author: swingirl
The older generation does expect to be called by their titles, it''s not snobbish, it''s just they way we were brought up. I would NEVER call my friend''s parents by their first names, it was always Mr and Mrs. and today 40 years later I still would not call my friend''s 80 year old mother by her first name. If it''s a tradition that you know they still keep you should follow it.


If your wedding is formal enough to have escort cards, it''s formal enough to use titles. You aren''t likely to offend anyone by using more formality.

I have decided to use titles. Our wedding and stationary are not ultra formal, but I''d rather err on the safe side.

I also never call my elders by their first names. My parents close friends are "Auntie____ " or "Uncle _____". Other new people are Mr or Mrs/Ms until they correct me, if they do. I actually thought it was weird when I started working and would call people (older than me) by their first names.

Oh, and my relatives actually are snobbish, not just traditional. They grilled me about what FI does for a living, what his family does etc.

I respect them of course, but they do have their noses in the air.

Thanks for the feedback! I''m freaking out over here...

 

[marchswallowbird]

Nobody will notice if you use MD for the two people you mentioned and not use any titles for the others. To me, this is the simplest way to solve the problem. If people think you''ve committed an etiquette sin, that''s their issue, IMO.