Jennifer W|1373233121|3478712 said:jmarshall|1373231007|3478692 said:madelise|1373215913|3478568 said:I find it upsetting that this very in-love, very excited man comes to our boards and asks for tips, but instead gets his intentions called sexist and is discouraged from doing what he has been dreaming of doing.
Not that big of a deal. I'm a big boy, and used to taking crap. I asked for opinions, that is exactly what I am getting.
Niel|1373216927|3478573 said:I do think she would be very happy to know how much thought you put into every facet of this proposal.
I don't think she would expect any less. I am a quick thinker, and good at making decisions on my feet, but if I have the opportunity to research and plan something, I research and plan like no other.
Jennifer W|1373228265|3478665 said:Circe, I'd go further than peeved. Honestly, I would have to decline any proposal of a life together where I wasn't the first person to hear, or at least to be asked about it.
So what about a situation where your SO had consulted with you about marriage in the past, and that you had both agreed that that is what you wanted.... but you weren't the first to know of the actual proposal?????
Well, I personally wouldn't be thrilled, to be honest. It just isn't something that I'd be comfortable with. I'm a control freak, and I like to be right at the very centre of my own life, with no surprises along the way. I wouldn't be pleased to know that any aspect of this very significant decision was discussed when I wasn't there. (Not at all important, since I'm not the one you're hoping to marry, but just my immediate response to your question, without over-thinking it.)
If you are confident that your intended is going to be ok with this, and welcome it, no worries. If you aren't absolutely certain, or hadn't thought it could even be an issue, maybe some discrete digging around first would be a good idea. I hope it goes well, if you decide to do it - If I was doing this, I think I'd probably ask both parents, since you said they are close. I'd guess her father will speak to his wife, so she'll hear about it anyway - if you're worried about a slip, then maybe best you tell them both, and swear them both to absolute secrecy. Good luck!
We've discussed it, It's not a requirement for her, but not a turn off either... You just made me curious.
And to everyone, please quit your childish **edited by moderator. please use family friendly language and simply report issues to the moderator** and arguing on my post. NOT appreciative.