Those in the US military or know about it...

[blackprophet]

Need your advice on a situation a friend is going through.

So I have a friend. Lets call her "G". G is seeing a guy in the military, lets call him "A".

G only sees A occasionally, like every few months. They have only been seeing each other for less than a year. Which is not suspicious, because he's in the armed forces right? Well a few months back she got an email from someone claiming to be in his unit (lets call this person "D"). D, emailing from his gmail account, claimed that A was missing in action in Afghanistan, where they were stationed. D however was not worried about A because he felt that A could handle himself. He was just giving G a status update, because he knows that A would want G to know what is going on with him. G was missing for a few days at least(Not sure exactly how long). G and D continue to correspond over email even after A was "found".

Is this situation plausible? All of G's friends are skeptical about A, but G is head over heels. I know nothing about the US military, so wondering if this should be a huge red flag for me.

Feel free to ask any questions to get more details. I'm sure I didn't do a great job explaining

 

[sonnyjane]

So now are you saying your friend is interested in the other guy? Or is she back in love with A? Either way, as a wife of someone with a long military career, I'll say I call BS. MIA information wouldn't be shared with non-family members, and this "friend" of the guy would be in serious breach of OPSEC (operational security) for sharing that information via email (at all really). Sounds like a catfish. My husband isn't even allowed to share that type of information with me. And to be declared MIA isn't a small thing, and you don't just "pop up" a while later and resume as normal. Lies for sure.

 

[amc80]

Does she know for sure that he is even in the military? If she knows his birthday she can check on here-

https://www.dmdc.osd.mil/appj/scra/single_record.xhtml

It all sounds weird to me.

 

[amc80]

So now are you saying your friend is interested in the other guy? Or is she back in love with A? Either way, as a wife of someone with a long military career, I'll say I call BS. MIA information wouldn't be shared with non-family members, and this "friend" of the guy would be in serious breach of OPSEC (operational security) for sharing that information via email (at all really). Sounds like a catfish. My husband isn't even allowed to share that type of information with me. And to be declared MIA isn't a small thing, and you don't just "pop up" a while later and resume as normal. Lies for sure.

Right. I'm guessing A = D and is married.

Your friend should ask him for his APO so she can mail him a care package. Guessing he won't give her one.

 

[blackprophet]

So now are you saying your friend is interested in the other guy? Or is she back in love with A? Either way, as a wife of someone with a long military career, I'll say I call BS. MIA information wouldn't be shared with non-family members, and this "friend" of the guy would be in serious breach of OPSEC (operational security) for sharing that information via email (at all really). Sounds like a catfish. My husband isn't even allowed to share that type of information with me. And to be declared MIA isn't a small thing, and you don't just "pop up" a while later and resume as normal. Lies for sure.

She is still in love with A. She has just continued to correspond with D over email. On strictly friend terms.

We've always suspected that A is a fraud. I figured that the over the email thing (an unencrypted public email like gmail at that) would be a non starter. Good to hear from someone with experience.

Specifically D said they "lost communications" with A.

I've done some of my own catfish type digging, and it seems like he is actually in the military. I just think G is his chick on the side.

 

[ImperfectGirl]

So now are you saying your friend is interested in the other guy? Or is she back in love with A? Either way, as a wife of someone with a long military career, I'll say I call BS. MIA information wouldn't be shared with non-family members, and this "friend" of the guy would be in serious breach of OPSEC (operational security) for sharing that information via email (at all really). Sounds like a catfish. My husband isn't even allowed to share that type of information with me. And to be declared MIA isn't a small thing, and you don't just "pop up" a while later and resume as normal. Lies for sure.

This. All kinds of red flags.

 

[blackprophet]

So now are you saying your friend is interested in the other guy? Or is she back in love with A? Either way, as a wife of someone with a long military career, I'll say I call BS. MIA information wouldn't be shared with non-family members, and this "friend" of the guy would be in serious breach of OPSEC (operational security) for sharing that information via email (at all really). Sounds like a catfish. My husband isn't even allowed to share that type of information with me. And to be declared MIA isn't a small thing, and you don't just "pop up" a while later and resume as normal. Lies for sure.

Right. I'm guessing A = D and is married.

Your friend should ask him for his APO so she can mail him a care package. Guessing he won't give her one.

A has admitted from the start that he is married and separated. He says he lives with his brother.

Not so sure about the separated part.

 

[amc80]

All I know is when my ex-bf was in Iraq, he called me every single day from his unit's satellite phone. If something happened in his unit (they had a helicopter crash), all communications got shut down so that info wouldn't leak out. One time he called me really fast (like a 10 second call) to say something had happened, he was okay, but I wouldn't hear from him in a few days. So I think it would be unlikely that your friend would get an email from anyone, especially someone who she didn't know personally. How long was he "missing"?

 

[sonnyjane]

All I know is when my ex-bf was in Iraq, he called me every single day from his unit's satellite phone. If something happened in his unit (they had a helicopter crash), all communications got shut down so that info wouldn't leak out. One time he called me really fast (like a 10 second call) to say something had happened, he was okay, but I wouldn't hear from him in a few days. So I think it would be unlikely that your friend would get an email from anyone, especially someone who she didn't know personally. How long was he "missing"?

This. If something like that happens, the unit/base goes "dark" - no emails, no calls. In addition if something really serious has happened, calls and emails can be monitored even after comms resume. And someone going MIA isn't just an "I'm sure he will turn up" situation..

 

[blackprophet]

All I know is when my ex-bf was in Iraq, he called me every single day from his unit's satellite phone. If something happened in his unit (they had a helicopter crash), all communications got shut down so that info wouldn't leak out. One time he called me really fast (like a 10 second call) to say something had happened, he was okay, but I wouldn't hear from him in a few days. So I think it would be unlikely that your friend would get an email from anyone, especially someone who she didn't know personally. How long was he "missing"?

I don't remember exactly how long he was missing, but it was a few days I'm fairly sure. Might have been longer than a week, but I'm not sure.

 

[sonnyjane]

Shared this story with my hubby who has been special forces for 11 years and has deployed several times and he laughed. Sorry, your friend is being lied to. I'm also sorry for you because I have a feeling your friend probably won't believe you.

 

[blackprophet]

Shared this story with my hubby who has been special forces for 11 years and has deployed several times and he laughed. Sorry, your friend is being lied to. I'm also sorry for you because I have a feeling your friend probably won't believe you.

This thread sort of confirms what we had all suspected for a while.

Now its just about building a big net to catch her once the truth comes out.

Thanks everyone for your knowledge.

 

[SB621]

No way would end of this happen in real life. Unless you are married and enrolled in the system a girlfriend is not recongized and would not be notified of anything.

What Sonnyjay said! I'm sorry for your friend as it sounds like the guy is a total dbag!

 

[perry]

Going missing for a few days.... in my days usually meant an unauthorized weekend+ of partying - usually with a new "friend"; and I cannot count the number of times after being AWOL someone had to visit the medical unit for some... "treatments".... They were usually cured of their infection(s)... by the time they got off of restriction and usually had less money to spend too due to the reduction in pay grade.

As for someone knowing about this and emailing someone to provide an update.... Bad karma is all over it. Certainly not a service buddy (who would cover for their real buddies).

Perry

 

[Nyc2chigal]

I find it very odd.
Why would someone go thru the trouble of emailing someone else's SO?

 

[blackprophet]

I find it very odd.
Why would someone go thru the trouble of emailing someone else's SO?

I could understand if it was a Guy who contacted his wife every day and the friend wanted to give the wife the heads up if that were allowed and if he really felt it was nothing to worry about.

But its not allowed as others have indicated in this thread.

Is personal email even allowed to be used on base? Or do you have to use a satelite phone to contact people back home?

 

[minousbijoux]

Shared this story with my hubby who has been special forces for 11 years and has deployed several times and he laughed. Sorry, your friend is being lied to. I'm also sorry for you because I have a feeling your friend probably won't believe you.

This thread sort of confirms what we had all suspected for a while.

Now its just about building a big net to catch her once the truth comes out.

Thanks everyone for your knowledge.

Wow, you are truly a good friend.

 

[Indylady]

Strange for sure.

 

[Ninna]

BIL retired from military this year, he said probably A got cought by his wife. He produces D, a gmail and a story to keep contact with G. I hope he's wrong, Red flags all around

 

[sonnyjane]

I find it very odd.
Why would someone go thru the trouble of emailing someone else's SO?

I could understand if it was a Guy who contacted his wife every day and the friend wanted to give the wife the heads up if that were allowed and if he really felt it was nothing to worry about.

But its not allowed as others have indicated in this thread.

Is personal email even allowed to be used on base? Or do you have to use a satelite phone to contact people back home?

Depends on where you're located. DH has been deployed to places in Iraq where we didn't even have a sat phone let alone computer access. He's also been places (Djibouti) where he had a computer and we could email several times a week. There's no "normal" in that regard. Some people can Skype with their loved ones every single day, and yet others can purchase local cell phones. Depends on the mission, the base, etc.

 

[blackprophet]

I find it very odd.
Why would someone go thru the trouble of emailing someone else's SO?

I could understand if it was a Guy who contacted his wife every day and the friend wanted to give the wife the heads up if that were allowed and if he really felt it was nothing to worry about.

But its not allowed as others have indicated in this thread.

Is personal email even allowed to be used on base? Or do you have to use a satelite phone to contact people back home?

Depends on where you're located. DH has been deployed to places in Iraq where we didn't even have a sat phone let alone computer access. He's also been places (Djibouti) where he had a computer and we could email several times a week. There's no "normal" in that regard. Some people can Skype with their loved ones every single day, and yet others can purchase local cell phones. Depends on the mission, the base, etc.

He was supposed to be stationed in Afghanistan.

 

[sonnyjane]

He was supposed to be stationed in Afghanistan.

Even within the country it can vary quite a bit. When DH was in Afghanistan he could email me a few times a week for the most part with a weekly satellite phone call, but he was in the field a lot. Guys that have more "typical" jobs and are working around the base for the most part have very regular comms - in fact I've had friends who complain that their husbands do nothing but play XBOX while deployed and ignore them lol, so it's not always torture over there. It really depends on the person's specific job. Since DH is SpecOps he tends to be out in the field a lot so our comms are less than the "norm".

In the case of your friend, once again, it's not unusual to get emails - it's unusual to get unauthorized emails disclosing highly classified information from strangers.

 

[SB621]

He was supposed to be stationed in Afghanistan.

Even within the country it can vary quite a bit. When DH was in Afghanistan he could email me a few times a week for the most part with a weekly satellite phone call, but he was in the field a lot. Guys that have more "typical" jobs and are working around the base for the most part have very regular comms - in fact I've had friends who complain that their husbands do nothing but play XBOX while deployed and ignore them lol, so it's not always torture over there. It really depends on the person's specific job. Since DH is SpecOps he tends to be out in the field a lot so our comms are less than the "norm".

In the case of your friend, once again, it's not unusual to get emails - it's unusual to get unauthorized emails disclosing highly classified information from strangers.

Can't stress this enough. You have to be an idiot to do this in the first place.

 

[blackprophet]

He was supposed to be stationed in Afghanistan.

Even within the country it can vary quite a bit. When DH was in Afghanistan he could email me a few times a week for the most part with a weekly satellite phone call, but he was in the field a lot. Guys that have more "typical" jobs and are working around the base for the most part have very regular comms - in fact I've had friends who complain that their husbands do nothing but play XBOX while deployed and ignore them lol, so it's not always torture over there. It really depends on the person's specific job. Since DH is SpecOps he tends to be out in the field a lot so our comms are less than the "norm".

In the case of your friend, once again, it's not unusual to get emails - it's unusual to get unauthorized emails disclosing highly classified information from strangers.

Can't stress this enough. You have to be an idiot to do this in the first place.

As a Civilian this was my gut feeling. Good to get confirmation from people in the know.