The infamous Two Months' Salary "rule"...

[Laila619]

...I know this is just something that was made up by DeBeers as a marketing tactic, but do you think this is a reasonable guideline? I'm curious to hear your thoughts. Guys, if you feel like sharing, did you spend about two months' salary on your gf's ring? Ladies, did your fiance/hubby follow this rule? Mine kind of did (maybe a little less), but it was completely by chance. He'd never even heard of this before!

 

[GMUAlum08]

Gross or net salary? Gross...no way

I came closer with my net salary but was still significantly under

 

[distracts]

Nope, my ring cost less than one month's salary.

 

[Rhea]

No, I don't think it's reasonable. I live in an area where cost of living is very high and housing alone is often 1/2 of a person's monthly salary.

No, he didn't spend 2 months salary. He spent 1 months savings on my ring.

 

[Enerchi]

Nope. My ring cost $1100 in 1984 and I paid for it because I had the money in my savings account! I think he's paid me back in other ways by now

 

[Laila619]

Gross or net salary? Gross...no way

I came closer with my net salary but was still significantly under

That's a good question. I'm not sure? Net is much more reasonable of course, but I'm sure DeBeers was thinking gross income when they invented this little "rule." If it's gross, then my DH definitely spent way less.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Certainly NOT on my original engagement ring, which cost about $1400.

My upgrade did not even cost 2 months gross.

 

[denverappraiser]

Why would anyone listen to the advice of a diamond mining company for how much to spend on a diamond? Spend what you can afford and what she'll like. Period. Zero is just fine. $100,000 is just fine. People with $100k budgets don't normally have a 'salary' in the classic sense and people with a zero budget normally have other things going on in their lives that take on more importance. So be it. Ignore DeBeers entirely. Do it based on your own finances, your financial advisors, and your objectives in exactly why you're buying it at all. This is among the most self-serving advice since the shampoo companies came up with 'lather, rinse, repeat'.

FWIW, I'm getting married soon and I spent more than that. Unfortunately, jewelry appraising isn't as good a gig as people tend to assume but my friends, family and neighbors still think I should have a big rock since I'm connected. Besides, I really like diamonds.

 

[Laila619]

Why would anyone listen to the advice of a diamond mining company for how much to spend on a diamond? Spend what you can afford and what she'll like. Period. Zero is just fine. $100,000 is just fine. People with $100k budgets don't normally have a 'salary' in the classic sense and people with a zero budget normally have other things going on in their lives that take on more importance. So be it. Ignore DeBeers entirely. Do it based on your own finances, your financial advisors, and your objectives in exactly why you're buying it at all. This is among the most self-serving advice since the shampoo companies came up with 'lather, rinse, repeat'.

FWIW, I'm getting married soon and I spent more than that. Unfortunately, jewelry appraising isn't as good a gig as people tend to assume but my friends, family and neighbors still think I should have a big rock since I'm connected. Besides, I really like diamonds.

Congratulations, Neil!!

 

[Missy]

Laila, I really think it depends on many factors. Not so much one's salary but the whole financial picture. What your expenses are, what money is coming in and what you are actually saving after all your expenses and if you have debt etc.

When my dh proposed we were financially secure (and older- not in our twenties), had no debt (I had already paid my mortgage and my dh had a mortgage but not a huge amount especially relative to money coming in) and so that factored into the ring. My diamond was bigger than couples who were getting engaged in their twenties and just starting out in their financial earning life. And I was absolutely comfortable with wearing it- it didn't make me self conscious. And we didn't hurt our savings at all.

So, it really depends on each individual situation. If our finances were different I would have been good marrying him with no ring at all or a tiny diamond. It really did not matter because all that mattered was I was marrying the love of my life. Everything else was extraneous. So that rule about 2 months or 3 months salary is ridiculous IMO. One has to take into account the whole financial picture so you can start your marriage in the best financial health one can. From my understanding finances are the number one problem in marriages where there are issues. And I am also risk adverse so that played into the whole decision as well as my dh knows this. Hell, we could have afforded a bigger ring if we used the 2 or 3 month rule but that's not my personality. The bank also was willing to give us a much much larger mortgage than we would have ever considered. Not my thing. I like to sleep at night.

 

[Enerchi]

Yes, congratulations, DenverAppraiser, on your upcoming wedding!!! Any chance you could share a pic of your fiance's ring??? "Enquiring minds want to know"

 

[Missy]

Why would anyone listen to the advice of a diamond mining company for how much to spend on a diamond? Spend what you can afford and what she'll like. Period. Zero is just fine. $100,000 is just fine. People with $100k budgets don't normally have a 'salary' in the classic sense and people with a zero budget normally have other things going on in their lives that take on more importance. So be it. Ignore DeBeers entirely. Do it based on your own finances, your financial advisors, and your objectives in exactly why you're buying it at all. This is among the most self-serving advice since the shampoo companies came up with 'lather, rinse, repeat'.

FWIW, I'm getting married soon and I spent more than that. Unfortunately, jewelry appraising isn't as good a gig as people tend to assume but my friends, family and neighbors still think I should have a big rock since I'm connected. Besides, I really like diamonds.

Congratulations, Neil!!

Oooh, congrats Neil!!!! Pics please!!

 

[Rhea]

Congratulations, Neil! I'd love to see the diamond ring if it's not against the rules.

 

[denverappraiser]

Yes, congratulations, DenverAppraiser, on your upcoming wedding!!! Any chance you could share a pic of your fiance's ring??? "Enquiring minds want to know"

I"ll let her post it if she wants and she may or may not admit to being related to me. I'm not sure what the rules are about me discussing my own shopping experiences. Obviously I'm a special case. It's not finished yet but I DID do some shopping with PS vendors. I bought 2 100% custom rings with diamonds, one for me and one for her and I got the diamonds and the rings from multiple different sources. Both rings are still in progress at two different suppliers. Yes, I"m going to get an independent appraisal done.

 

[Laila619]

Yes, congratulations, DenverAppraiser, on your upcoming wedding!!! Any chance you could share a pic of your fiance's ring??? "Enquiring minds want to know"

I"ll let her post it if she wants and she may or may not admit to being related to me. I'm not sure what the rules are about me discussing my own shopping experiences. Obviously I'm a special case. It's not finished yet but I DID do some shopping with PS vendors. I bought 2 100% custom rings with diamonds, one for me and one for her and I got the diamonds and the rings from multiple different sources. Both rings are still in progress at two different suppliers. Yes, I"m going to get an independent appraisal done.

 

[finallylooking]

My SO budgeted about 2.5 months net. Its more generous than I was expecting but I won't complain! We're both fortunate to have savings and no debt, though.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Why would anyone listen to the advice of a diamond mining company for how much to spend on a diamond? Spend what you can afford and what she'll like. Period. Zero is just fine. $100,000 is just fine. People with $100k budgets don't normally have a 'salary' in the classic sense and people with a zero budget normally have other things going on in their lives that take on more importance. So be it. Ignore DeBeers entirely. Do it based on your own finances, your financial advisors, and your objectives in exactly why you're buying it at all. This is among the most self-serving advice since the shampoo companies came up with 'lather, rinse, repeat'.

FWIW, I'm getting married soon and I spent more than that. Unfortunately, jewelry appraising isn't as good a gig as people tend to assume but my friends, family and neighbors still think I should have a big rock since I'm connected. Besides, I really like diamonds.

Now that is one smart man! And a lucky lady, too! Congrats, Neil!

 

[Enerchi]

Yes, congratulations, DenverAppraiser, on your upcoming wedding!!! Any chance you could share a pic of your fiance's ring??? "Enquiring minds want to know"

I"ll let her post it if she wants and she may or may not admit to being related to me. I'm not sure what the rules are about me discussing my own shopping experiences. Obviously I'm a special case. It's not finished yet but I DID do some shopping with PS vendors. I bought 2 100% custom rings with diamonds, one for me and one for her and I got the diamonds and the rings from multiple different sources. Both rings are still in progress at two different suppliers. Yes, I"m going to get an independent appraisal done.

Ditto the !!

And just who to YOU go to??? (ok, clearly not a fair question, so don't answer - I'm just razzin' ya!) I hope your FI decides to post - would love to see what an expert in the field, decided to go with both for yourself and your fiance. Now I'm TOTALLY itching to see the rings!!!

 

[pinkjewel]

No- my DH didn't spend anywhere near as much as 2 months salary-either gross or net! I didn't really care-it's a beautiful ring and what was more important to me was that he gave it to me.

 

[Diamond*Dana]

My original e-ring in 1995 was $1500, so DH spent less than 2 months salary.

DH purchased an upgraded e-ring for me last Christmas and was pretty close to
his 2 month take home but not gross.

 

[Frenchcut]

My husband spent around 2 months of his salary but that was not meant to be...and he didn't base his purchase on that "rule". I honestly didn't expect him to spend more that a month salary when we started looking for a ring!

 

[BigHenry]

Less than that. I am sure she would have loved it if I did but I didn't even want to spend $5k on it. As much as I didn't like the idea of diamonds, once I started my research and learning more and more. I wouldn't mind having some for myself But I was unable to think of any practical use that I would get out of them (I don't wear jewelry).

 

[Fife]

Shoot, I spent about 5 months income on her ring, but I don't care. She's worth it and I have no debt well, I do now... Like a tattoo, she's going to be wearing this for the rest of her life. She's going to look at it every single day, and people will ask her about it. I'm very thankful that I'm in a position to buy her a ring that she will be proud to show off to the world.

 

[Gypsy]

I think it's just silly. You can afford what you can afford. I think the reason they do this is to try to 'simplify' for the customer what generally they can expect to spend and to encourage greater spending. As most people have no idea what diamonds cost per carat. So they tried to come up with a 'guideline' to tell people what diamonds cost. It's not a very good one. But since their other goal was to get people to spend MORE -- well, I think that for most people two months is more than they would spend-- so it does probably guilt people into spending more. So in that respect it was probably successful.

You have to realize the source and their goals. De Beers is not an informational agency operating on a not-for-profit basis in order to provide customer education. They are in the business of selling diamonds. So their goal in any advertising is to sell more diamonds. So anything they say should be taken that way.

 

[yssie]

CONGRATS Mr & Mrs Beaty-to-be!!

 

[texaskj]

Marketing, pure marketing.
Would you let a home builder tell you how much to spend for a house?
An automaker or car dealer tell you how much to spend on a car?


Congrats Neil

 

[peasypeas]

congratulations on your engagement!

 

[whatmeworry]

Congratulations Neil.

I decided that the budget was going to have an ouch factor to it. So it was maybe 2.5 months worth. Ouch!

 

[Polished]

The two months rule seems so typical of marketers to bring the purchase down to simply being about money spent. As though it automatically folows that if you spend the max you can afford the result will be brilliant. The research and thought that goes into this purchase is more likely to bring about a ring that will be special to an individual woman than simply how much it cost.

Although it it is a huge generalisation, because it depends on people's circumstances and priorities, but I do like the idea that this special purchase should hurt a little. Forget de Beers, the L'oreal ad. is more apt for an engagement ring - "because you're worth it!"

 

[madelise]

Why would anyone listen to the advice of a diamond mining company for how much to spend on a diamond? Spend what you can afford and what she'll like. Period. Zero is just fine. $100,000 is just fine. People with $100k budgets don't normally have a 'salary' in the classic sense and people with a zero budget normally have other things going on in their lives that take on more importance. So be it. Ignore DeBeers entirely. Do it based on your own finances, your financial advisors, and your objectives in exactly why you're buying it at all. This is among the most self-serving advice since the shampoo companies came up with 'lather, rinse, repeat'.

FWIW, I'm getting married soon and I spent more than that. Unfortunately, jewelry appraising isn't as good a gig as people tend to assume but my friends, family and neighbors still think I should have a big rock since I'm connected. Besides, I really like diamonds.

+1 on both the post and your coming wedding!