Suggestions for a hostess gift

[YadaYadaYada]

I hope you are all having a good start to your Thursday!

As some of you know I took a trip to visit my SIL in Brooklyn this past weekend. I didn't bring a gift with me since I was riding on a train and subway so food would be out and I didn't want to risk something breakable. However I want to send them something for their hospitality. Hopefully I didn't make a huge faux pas already by not bringing something along!

A little background, SIL is 24 and her roommate is 30, it's the roommate I'm more concerned about, she is an attorney and comes from a wealthy family. So my goal is something cool and on trend for their age group.

I don't know what a reasonable budget is even

 

[missy]

Stephanie the amount of money you're comfortable spending is up to you. There's no right or wrong. It's truly the thought. About 20 years ago when I went to meet my boyfriend's (now dh) SIL and brother and we stayed with them for the weekend (they lived in Florida at the time) I sent a beautiful Tiffany glass vase ahead. I ordered it from Tiffany and they shipped it for me. My (future but I didn't know it yet lol as we were just dating at that time) SIL loved it and I know she appreciated it. It was a long time ago but I want to say it cost about $150. But not completely sure. It wasn't super expensive but it also wasn't super cheap. It was right in my comfort zone. HTH.

 

[monarch64]

Succulents. On trend for that age group and area, very low-maintenance, and you can spend as much or as little as you like. It's also not a keepsake sort of item they might worry about dividing up if they don't always stay roommates.

https://simplysucculents.com/

https://www.anthropologie.com/garden-outdoor

 

[whitewave]

I prefer things I can use and then throw away, like interesting coffee or wine.

 

[telephone89]

My go to is always champagne. Even if they aren't heavy drinkers, there's been many an occasion to celebrate something and "Oh! We have that bottle of champagne from so-and-so!" haha.
Or, if you're me, you just open it on a random Friday night. (it's low carb ok...)

 

[CJ2008]

I prefer things I can use and then throw away, like interesting coffee or wine.

Same here.

And of course ideally you want to get something that does line up with their interests, if you know them or can find out (do they drink wine, or tea, or coffee, or do they like chocolate, etc.)

I like telephone's idea of champagne - had never thought of it but it's true champagne will always come in handy at some point! (hopefully!)

 

[SMC]

I think you can't go wrong with a nice bottle of wine!

If they don't have one already, Amazon Echo is also a nice gift.

 

[Asscherhalo_lover]

I'm 31 and work in brooklyn, we always love wine

 

[MaisOuiMadame]

I think you have an advantage now that you have visited them already. Did you have the occasion to talk about any hobbies/interests/passions while you where there? I'd work a very personal gift around this. Budget is less important this way also (because you mentioned the roommate's background).
- For coffee or tea lovers, a very very nice assortment of the best brands or a gift card for their local coffee shop.
-If they scented candles, a luxe one from cire trudon/diptyque.
-Wine or champagne if they love it.
I have gotten 300€+ bottles of booze on multiple occasions and I KNOW it
sounds ungrateful, but I DON'T enjoy drinking alcohol at all. So I was not super impressed...but I love nice candles, so a 50€ candle is something that I would be very excited about.

 

[YadaYadaYada]

You guys are giving me some great ideas. I wouldn't have thought of wine even though I noticed several bottles in the kitchen. The coffee and champagne ideas are great as well, it will be hard to decide!

Monarch, I like your succulent suggestion, in fact so much that I might get one for myself

 

[Tacori E-ring]

I think a GC to a favorite restaurant is always appreciated.

 

[YadaYadaYada]

I think you have an advantage now that you have visited them already. Did you have the occasion to talk about any hobbies/interests/passions while you where there? I'd work a very personal gift around this. Budget is less important this way also (because you mentioned the roommate's background).
- For coffee or tea lovers, a very very nice assortment of the best brands or a gift card for their local coffee shop.
-If they scented candles, a luxe one from cire trudon/diptyque.
-Wine or champagne if they love it.
I have gotten 300€+ bottles of booze on multiple occasions and I KNOW it
sounds ungrateful, but I DON'T enjoy drinking alcohol at all. So I was not super impressed...but I love nice candles, so a 50€ candle is something that I would be very excited about.

Kipari,

Unfortunately I didn't gain much insight from my brief conversations with the roommate, she is pretty reserved. However, she did have candles burning the whole time I was there, I might not have remembered if you hadn't mentioned them. I might find a way to do a coffee/wine/candle basket. That way there is something for both of them to enjoy.

 

[YadaYadaYada]

Tacori, that is a great suggestion especially because the roommate eats out a lot. I know a couple of the places they frequent so that would be a good possibility.

 

[MollyMalone]

A riff on Tacori E-Ring's suggestion: a gift card to Caviar, the restaurant delivery service. This idea came from my niece & her roommates who live in NYC and are 2 years older than your SIL. She says Caviar's service is superior to, e.g., GrubHub & it has a terrific selection of restaurants to choose from. And when they come home from work, many nights they feel like just putting their feet up ; - )
https://www.trycaviar.com/brooklyn-queens

 

[PintoBean]

Tacori, that is a great suggestion especially because the roommate eats out a lot. I know a couple of the places they frequent so that would be a good possibility.

I think a thank you card with a GC to one of the restaurants they took you to eat at or that you know they love is a great gift!

 

[arkieb1]

Another vote for either a gift card to a food service that delivers or tickets to movies, or some type of show you think both of them would like. A gift card for a service that offers a range of decent quality restaurant food is probably the safer option.

 

[azstonie]

So the gift card to the restaurant, what are you talking here, $250-$500?

I guess I'm old school: A hostess gift is a token of your gratitude for being entertained and isn't supposed to be on par with a wedding gift---a wonderful bottle of champagne or wine, flowers delivered after your visit is over, engraved note cards, a crystal item for the household, French soaps for the bathroom, etc. It comes with a charming note of thanks from you. Then, you extend hospitality when asked or when you sense they would like to be your guest.

 

[PintoBean]

So the gift card to the restaurant, what are you talking here, $250-$500?

I guess I'm old school: A hostess gift is a token of your gratitude for being entertained and isn't supposed to be on par with a wedding gift---a wonderful bottle of champagne or wine, flowers delivered after your visit is over, engraved note cards, a crystal item for the household, French soaps for the bathroom, etc. It comes with a charming note of thanks from you. Then, you extend hospitality when asked or when you sense they would like to be your guest.

i think there is also an efficiency aspect to a GC gift. Assuming the girls live in an apartment, sometimes the package won't be delivered to the recipient if the recipient isn't home, so the girls could end up having to make an extra trip to UPS/USPS/Fedex to pick it up. If the delivery driver is lacks, he could just leave it outside their door and the package could end up being stolen by someone. A GC in a thank you card is less conspicuous and would be safely tucked into their mailbox.

 

[junebug17]

If this is a gift for both of them, I'm thinking something consumable like a tea/coffee gift basket might be the best thing - that way they can both enjoy the items and there's no awkwardness about who keeps the gift if someone moves out. Soaps for the bathroom is a nice idea too.

I don't think you have to break the bank on the gift - I agree with azstonie, it's really just a token of your appreciation for their hospitality. I used to agonize over gifts and the older I get, the more I realize it really is the thought that counts.

 

[azstonie]

i think there is also an efficiency aspect to a GC gift. Assuming the girls live in an apartment, sometimes the package won't be delivered to the recipient if the recipient isn't home, so the girls could end up having to make an extra trip to UPS/USPS/Fedex to pick it up. If the delivery driver is lacks, he could just leave it outside their door and the package could end up being stolen by someone. A GC in a thank you card is less conspicuous and would be safely tucked into their mailbox.

Right, right. When I'm a guest in someone's home who works, I arrive with my hostess gift wrapped and ready to go. Then, from home, I follow up with a thank you note specific to the stay including an offer to host them in the future.

 

[azstonie]

Here's my problem with gift cards: The amount. I'm a generous gift giver. I never go cheap in any way. But if its going to show the amount of money involved (ugh), then I'm concerned because for a meal, you're including a guest of the recipient, and do they order appetizers, a cocktail, bottles of wine, dessert and cappuccino? What kind of tip on top of that to assume?

This is why a GC is fraught for this purpose.

ETA: If you want to give them a lovely meal, I think probably the best way to do that is to take them while you're a guest in their house. That way you take away the burden of giving you a meal and you can handle all the money aspects of your thanks discretely. Then follow up with thank you card.

 

[MollyMalone]

Stephanie, I don't know where you live, but since you indicated that sending a gift of wine or coffees appeals to you, is there a winery with some nice choices in your area (IIRC NY laws prohibit retailers from shipping to a NY address -- and you yourself can't box up some wine & send it off -- but wineries are free to ship to NY residents) or a local coffee bean roaster? Perhaps a bakery that makes tasty biscotti to send along with a duo of 1-pound bags of locally roasted coffee? Receiving a "hometown" gift always seems extra fun-special to me.

Or, speaking of wine, perhaps one of these gizmos? My other niece is quite fond of hers : - )
https://www.amazon.com/Secura-Stainless-Electric-Bottle-Opener/dp/B01261VEOG/

Or, because warmer weather is sure to arrive soon here in NYC, which means most of us are drinking even more iced beverages -- and our GreenMarkets will have an abundance of local fruits for infusing water, tea -- a pitcher like this?
https://www.amazon.com/Infusion-Borosilicate-Capacity-Stainless-BPA-FREE/dp/B01DNBER8I/

 

[YadaYadaYada]

You guys are lifesavers, I wouldn't have come up with half these ideas on my own.

So, I'm going with the Caviar gift card idea because she used it while I was there and she hadn't even heard of it prior to my visit. That way it isn't a package that could be stolen.

Thank you for all the suggestions everyone!

 

[Queenie60]

So the gift card to the restaurant, what are you talking here, $250-$500?

I guess I'm old school: A hostess gift is a token of your gratitude for being entertained and isn't supposed to be on par with a wedding gift---a wonderful bottle of champagne or wine, flowers delivered after your visit is over, engraved note cards, a crystal item for the household, French soaps for the bathroom, etc. It comes with a charming note of thanks from you. Then, you extend hospitality when asked or when you sense they would like to be your guest.

Completely agree with this.