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stranger going through my things

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Munchkin

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Ok, I need to vent because I am really creeped out. Warning, this post will likely be a garbled, stream-of-consciousness type deal!

So FI and I went to my home state of MA for our wedding tasting and I had a fitting. (yay!) I had gone to my parents on Thursday and he joined me on Friday. Since we had two cars I was able to stop at Providence Place (nice mall) to shop on the way back home to CT. I was behind FI by about an hour.

When FI arrived at my apartment, the front door was wide open. As he walked into my apartment, a woman came walking down the hall towards him. He said "Hi. Who the hell are you?" She replied. "You must be freaking out, I''m the previous owner." She went on to say that she had spoken to my landlord the previous day and he had given her permission to come by because she thought she may have left her wedding dress in the attic. She wanted to leave her name and number and asked that we call if we find her dress. She also asked my FI if she could try to get into the attic while he looked for a pen. He said she could try. She was back in about 30 seconds saying she wasn''t able to get up there. After leaving her name and number, she left.

I came home about and hour later and he told me the story. I was IRATE. I went back to my bedroom (the attic is above my closet) and noticed that my things had been disturbed. Drawers and trunks were open that I KNOW were shut. Objects were in the wrong place. Even my wedding band was placed in its box differently than I keep it! My passport was half in its place, etc. It was clear she had a field day going through my things. Even script bottles were slightly off from their normal resting place in my bathroom. Furious, I called my landlord.

He had never given her permission to enter my apartment. They had never had a discussion about a wedding dress. He had left her a message saying that a delivery of Poland Springs had arrived for her and to call him to arrange a time to come get it. He called her to find out what she was doing on the property. She informed him that my FI was already in the apartment and had given her permission to look around.

As for how she got in, we aren''t entirely sure. FI assumes he locked the front door, but does not specifically remember doing so on Friday morning. The screen door to the back was askew. It is possible the back door was left unlocked as that is how I get to the washer dryer. The place I rent is a house on a nature preserve, so it is entirely conceivable that the back door could have been left unlocked as I have (up to now!) felt completely safe!

I am really creeped out. Nothing is missing, but I feel violated that she was going through my things and walking around my home. (Which of course was horribly messy at the time!) Both my landlord and my Dad (attorney) told me to file a police report. I am just waiting for FI to come back to my apartment so we can go together. (I need him since he is the only witness.) I just can''t rid myself of this horrible feeling that a stranger was in my underwear drawer and likely tried on a wedding band that I haven''t even worn yet. Grrrrrr.

I just needed to vent. Thanks for the oppurtunity!
 

Maisie

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How dreadful! I don''t blame you for being upset. I would be livid!

I feel sorry for her going through your stuff but I really feel for you if you think she tried your wedding band on! Is there anyway you can exchange it for a new one?

I would definitely file a police report. Do it soon while the incident is fresh in your fiances memory.

Maisie
 

crown1

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Joined
Nov 22, 2006
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1,682
hi munchkin! i would be feeling just as you are. are you sure she does not have a key? were the locks changed? i would check that out if you don''t already know. i hope you get to the bottom of this.
 

Kaleigh

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That's really creepy munchkin!!! Were the locks changed after she moved out?? That takes a lot of nerve, and would be livid too.
 

KindredSpirit717

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Mar 26, 2007
Messages
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wow munchkin, that is seriously creepy! i thought it would have been odd for a landlord to let a former resident in without the present residents permission. i can''t imagine how violated you must feel to have a nosey person go through your things looking which were probably in places where a wedding dress would most likely NOT be. even her story about thinking she left her wedding dress there is a little odd...how long have you been living there for her to suddenly realize this? a wedding dress is an important thing to most women and often isn''t forgetten about for very long. i hope it works out for you and that you can feel safe in your home again, i know what it''s like not feeling safe in a house since i live in a very shady neighborhood at the moment (it''s temporary though). the only good thing about being aware of being in a not so safe environment is that my husband and i are very aware of our security and lock the door as soon as we''re in or out of the house (if only one of our housemates realized the same thing..
...). anyway try to feel better!! (btw your home sounds amazing, i would love to live on a nature preserve, it must look gorgeous in spring!!)
 

Munchkin

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Joined
Nov 3, 2004
Messages
540
I actually saw my landlord change the locks the day I moved in. He is adding deadbolts to all the doors tonight, too.
Thanks for you support!

Maisie: The band is actually a signed pieces eternity that was made to fit my size, so It would be have to be made again.
 

crown1

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Nov 22, 2006
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i would not feel to badly about the wedding band since it is entirely possible someone at the store or manufacturer has tried it on before. most rings bought from stores have been tried on also so i would try to put that out of my mind.

i am relieved that the locks have been changed and that the deadbolts are going on. life is full of these little things that are hurtful i hope this is the last you see or hear of her.
 

justjulia

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Apr 4, 2006
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I would file a police report immediately and get the police to try to contact her via the information she left you on that note. She must be stopped before she does this to someone else, and odds are good this is her routine. I''m amazed nothing was missing. How odd.
 

Ellen

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Munchkin, how creepy. I can only imagine how you feel...

What has me wondering is, how did she know you were gone? If she knocked, just because someone doesn''t answer doesn''t mean no one''s home....And why did she feel she had so much time to snoop? Most people who break in, are in and out quickly, even though we don''t think she was in there to steal stuff, still...

Let us know what happens.
 

justjulia

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Date: 4/1/2007 5:23:36 PM
Author: Ellen
Munchkin, how creepy. I can only imagine how you feel...

What has me wondering is, how did she know you were gone? If she knocked, just because someone doesn''t answer doesn''t mean no one''s home....And why did she feel she had so much time to snoop? Most people who break in, are in and out quickly, even though we don''t think she was in there to steal stuff, still...

Let us know what happens.
Good points, Ellen.
Did your boyfriend by chance see the car she came in? What in the world was she after? I''d get the boyfriend to work with a police artist to draw her face up and compare to others on file....
 

Maisie

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Date: 4/1/2007 5:00:21 PM
Author: crown1
i would not feel to badly about the wedding band since it is entirely possible someone at the store or manufacturer has tried it on before. most rings bought from stores have been tried on also so i would try to put that out of my mind.

i am relieved that the locks have been changed and that the deadbolts are going on. life is full of these little things that are hurtful i hope this is the last you see or hear of her.
Its very possible someone at the store tried the ring on but I would still feel upset about this particular person trying it on. The circumstances are very different in my opinion.
 

Munchkin

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 3, 2004
Messages
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"Good points, Ellen.
Did your boyfriend by chance see the car she came in? What in the world was she after? I''d get the boyfriend to work with a police artist to draw her face up and compare to others on file.... "

She actually WAS the previous owner, though! That wasn''t a line.

I feel like she probably was coming by to look for a dress, but saw an opportunity to snoop when she realized she was alone. (Brazen much?) The sad thing is, I absolutely would have let her look for said dress (keeping her company of course!) had she only contacted me to ask!

The circumstances in which she lost the house were not so nice (forclosure due to tax lien) so she did weird things like take all the smoke detectors when she moved out, anyway. I almost feel as though she is genuinely a bit "off" and feels as though I am living in her home.
 

iheartscience

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Jan 1, 2007
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Wow, Munchkin, this is beyond creepy. I''m glad you''re taking it seriously and filing a police report. This woman definitely has more than a few screws loose...yikes. I can''t imagine how terrible and violated you are feeling. I hope the police arrest her for breaking and entering. And I''m glad nothing has gone missing and you''re okay!
 

starryeyed

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Joined
Nov 6, 2006
Messages
2,398
Oh my goodness munchkin! This is outrageous! Personally, I would probably move when my lease is up.

File a police report asap!!! This is breaking and entering!! Nothing is missing that you know of, but you probably can''t check/remember everything. I would press charges. This is your home! I would not take this lightly.

Just because she is a woman and the former owner, she should not get away with this. She has violated a basic law. She lied to cover for herself. She probably knows all the tricks for getting in, so there needs to be an emotional barrier for her. Jail time would probably do it! That wedding dress thing was an excuse - don''t believe it for a minute!

If you should discover something missing down the road and need to file an insurance claim, you will need the police report. Call the police asap!
 

Tacori E-ring

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Messages
20,037
She''s obviously a crazy person. Did you look in the attic? I would be curious to see if anything was up there.
 

justjulia

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Messages
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Date: 4/1/2007 6:06:31 PM
Author: Munchkin
''Good points, Ellen.
Did your boyfriend by chance see the car she came in? What in the world was she after? I''d get the boyfriend to work with a police artist to draw her face up and compare to others on file.... ''

She actually WAS the previous owner, though! That wasn''t a line.

I feel like she probably was coming by to look for a dress, but saw an opportunity to snoop when she realized she was alone. (Brazen much?) The sad thing is, I absolutely would have let her look for said dress (keeping her company of course!) had she only contacted me to ask!

The circumstances in which she lost the house were not so nice (forclosure due to tax lien) so she did weird things like take all the smoke detectors when she moved out, anyway. I almost feel as though she is genuinely a bit ''off'' and feels as though I am living in her home.
I would think about a security system maybe? Had you met her before?
 

Munchkin

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 3, 2004
Messages
540
Neither FI nor I had ever met her before. She had dealt with my landlord before I ever moved in.

My landlord called her to discuss what happened. She states that FI was already in the apartment when she entered and told her she could look around.

So, she told FI that the landlord gave her permission, and she tells the landlord that FI gave her permission.

Well, I''m off to tell the police that no one gave her permission!
 

Kaleigh

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Joined
Nov 18, 2004
Messages
29,570
Date: 4/1/2007 8:01:33 PM
Author: Munchkin
Neither FI nor I had ever met her before. She had dealt with my landlord before I ever moved in.

My landlord called her to discuss what happened. She states that FI was already in the apartment when she entered and told her she could look around.

So, she told FI that the landlord gave her permission, and she tells the landlord that FI gave her permission.

Well, I''m off to tell the police that no one gave her permission!
Good, let us know what they say.
 

FireGoddess

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Jan 25, 2005
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Date: 4/1/2007 8:01:33 PM
Author: Munchkin
So, she told FI that the landlord gave her permission, and she tells the landlord that FI gave her permission.
That pretty much flat out says that no one gave her permission. Let us know what the police say!
 

KindredSpirit717

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 26, 2007
Messages
66
wow goodluck with the police report and keep us posted. i still can''t believe she is lying through her teeth to you about the landlord and to the landlord about you. i wonder if she really wasn''t there for a dress, but to check to see things at her house were going...so very creepy though...
 

kcoursolle

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Joined
Jan 21, 2006
Messages
10,589
This sort of thing creeps me out and I think it''s best to be safe. I''d report it to the police, tell your neighbors to look out for suspicious activity, and have your locks changed...and remember to actually lock your doors and windows!
 

dani13

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2004
Messages
6,183
WOW, Munchkin, how creepy!! I personally dont think it was about the dress at all....This woman obviously has major issues...Please file the report and get out of there ASAP....Sorry you are going though this.
 

justjulia

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Joined
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Messages
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Date: 4/1/2007 8:01:33 PM
Author: Munchkin
Neither FI nor I had ever met her before. She had dealt with my landlord before I ever moved in.

My landlord called her to discuss what happened. She states that FI was already in the apartment when she entered and told her she could look around.

So, she told FI that the landlord gave her permission, and she tells the landlord that FI gave her permission.

Well, I''m off to tell the police that no one gave her permission!
OMG.
This is like out of a movie. So, what about quoting back to her, "I know you must be freaking out..." I''d like to know what the police would say about his already being in there and her saying that...they don''t jive. Ya know?
 

sumbride

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Feb 17, 2006
Messages
3,867
Wow, yeah, I''d worry that she''d come back.

When I was about 10, some people came to our door and said they used to live there and thought they might have left something in the attic. I can''t remember what it was now, but though my parents were the 2nd owners of the house, they moved in the year before I was born. Waiting 11 years to come by and see if something was in the attic? weird. Anyway, since I was 10, I told them we couldn''t get into the attic (as far as I knew!) and told them to come back at night. They never came back, and my dad said he''d been in the attic a lot and never seen anything there, and we didn''t use it for storage so it wouldn''t have been mixed in with our stuff. My parents were pretty sure they were trying to case the place for robbery. Or maybe they found whatever it was they were looking for elsewhere. It still sort of creeps me out.
 

IrishAngel7982

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
May 5, 2006
Messages
1,412
Oh wow that is so scary! I hope you were able to file the report with the police...I would be so creeped out if I were in that situation. I can''t believe she would lie to your landlord, and your fiance, let alone enter your home as she pleases. I hope the name and contact information she left are legit so the police are able to find her (hoping they pursue this for you!)
 

Munchkin

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 3, 2004
Messages
540
It''s gotten worse.

We stopped by the downstairs neighbor to see if the 23 year old son could remember what time he had spoken to her. (She went to the downstairs apt first and spoke to the 23 year old son, then aparently proceeded upstairs.) I was hoping we would be able to estimate how long she had been in my apartment before FI came in.

He couldn''t remember what time it was but mentioned "She seemed like a junkie. She asked me if I knew where she could score some Oxy." Ummm...hello...that would have been helpful information to tell me yesterday! (After I learned about it last night, I went down to warn the neighbors in case she had gone through their stuff. The son mentioned he had spoken to her briefly, but did not mention the drug stuff.)

So, I went back through my belongings with the perspective of someone who is drug seeking, rather than simply nosey. I can not find my SS or the one prescription pad I always have in my home. Thankfully, my Rx pads do not have my DEA, so it would be difficult to fill a Rx for a controlled substance, but this makes things MUCH more problematic.

We did go to the police station and they were very nice. They will be getting in touch with her.

I don''t even know who to alert if my SS is truly missing! I moved in a month ago, so things are still a bit in disarray, so I just don''t know if it is lost or stolen!

So mad right now.
 

Kaleigh

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
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Messages
29,570
Date: 4/1/2007 10:00:41 PM
Author: Munchkin
It''s gotten worse.

We stopped by the downstairs neighbor to see if the 23 year old son could remember what time he had spoken to her. (She went to the downstairs apt first and spoke to the 23 year old son, then aparently proceeded upstairs.) I was hoping we would be able to estimate how long she had been in my apartment before FI came in.

He couldn''t remember what time it was but mentioned ''She seemed like a junkie. She asked me if I knew where she could score some Oxy.'' Ummm...hello...that would have been helpful information to tell me yesterday! (After I learned about it last night, I went down to warn the neighbors in case she had gone through their stuff. The son mentioned he had spoken to her briefly, but did not mention the drug stuff.)

So, I went back through my belongings with the perspective of someone who is drug seeking, rather than simply nosey. I can not find my SS or the one prescription pad I always have in my home. Thankfully, my Rx pads do not have my DEA, so it would be difficult to fill a Rx for a controlled substance, but this makes things MUCH more problematic.

We did go to the police station and they were very nice. They will be getting in touch with her.

I don''t even know who to alert if my SS is truly missing! I moved in a month ago, so things are still a bit in disarray, so I just don''t know if it is lost or stolen!

So mad right now.
Sounds like she knows a whole lot about you. Meaning she knew you''re in the medical profession, stole a script pad!! I''d also call the local pharmacies to alert them as well. The SS is your social security card?? I''d call first thing in the morning. This is getting creepier by the minute. So glad the police have been notified.
 

VRBeauty

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Premium
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Apr 2, 2006
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10,225
Munchkin:

I''m so sorry that you''re going through this. My house has been broken into twice (fortunately both times at least 10 years ago) so I know how disconcerting it can be. And her taking your prescription pad and social security number/card makes it that much more complicated.

It sounds like she is a junkie looking for a quick fix, but that doesn''t mean that she might not have been looking for information that would be easy to sell, such as your social security number. Is there any chance that she picked up a credit card statement or other correspondance that would giver her information about your other accounts? Also, be sure to check your checkbooks. One of my friends ran into problems when someone stole a blank check from the middle of her checkbook.

As for the ring... I know cooties are just a childhood ''thing,'' but under the circumstances I understand why if might feel like it''s somehow tainted. Maybe you and your FI can think of a way that you could get the ring blessed, or something the two of you can do to ''resanctify" it.
 

diamondfan

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Joined
Jun 17, 2005
Messages
11,016
That is so upsetting and creepy. Is there a chance she knows you and is just an oddball? Yick. I would make sure landlord knows she is not to come near your property for any reason in the future. Can your guy describe her well? I am so sorry this is not a nice thing to deal with. Change all the locks, look into some extra security measures and make sure you always lock up...
 

justjulia

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Joined
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Messages
2,308
I think things will unfold as they should, now that the police are on it. I wonder if they can dust for prints near your medicine cabinet. It is interesting that she talked with the downstairs neighbor first...I mean, why''d she do that? Did he let her in? I''m confused now as to who she says allowed her in. She seems to be saying that the landlord let her in, but where''d the key come from? Oh, now I remember about the back door possibly being open. Man, it sounds like she thought she''d get away with running through your place unseen. Honestly all the hallmarks of someone on a controlled substance.
Well, now you have two witnesses and clearly she was there without anyone''s permission. And she did not know how to get into an attic that supposedly she herself put her dress in. I tell ya, this is weird.
 
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