Wedding Someone help me... about to go bridezilla

[anchor31]

Date: 7/3/2008 8:33:33 AM
Author: Cleopatra

Date: 7/3/2008 1:05:14 AM
Author: anchor31
My brother''s FI''s dress (in gold, of course):

No way! Yes, I agree with IG - your FSIL will look very silly - and overdressed.

Anchor, you''re a darling and I''m so sorry that you''re stressed like this! As I said in the other thread, I''ll be thinking of you and your mom and praying for her strength the week leading up to the wedding - it will be a joyous occasion and the fact that your family will be there to celebrate in any way is a blessing.

I think that in everyone''s planning experiences, the month leading up to the big day is the most stressful - things that wouldn''t have bugged you at month three are suddenly a big deal at 1 month out! Things have a way of working themselves out - maybe not necessarily in the easiest and least-stressful way, but the end result is still the same - you marrying the love of your life - how much more PERFECT can it get???!

And don''t worry about FSIL - no one can outshine you on your wedding day - you''ll look radiant in that beautiful dress!

Looking forward to our big day!

Tell me about it. Thanks for your support, sweetie!

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/3/2008 9:08:16 AM
Author: robbie3982
Awe, I''m sorry you''re so stressed out! I can definitely see why you''re upset. I think everyone gets to a point eventually where they say ''Screw it! I don''t care!'' I know I definitely did and I felt so much more relaxed after that. Like others have said already, in the end all that will matter is that you and your FI will be married.

PS - I agree that your FSIL''s dress is yuck

. And you should check out this dress from Target to wear to your brother''s wedding. I wore it to a wedding and got tons of compliments.

Robbie, I would totally rock that dress if it was longer! I''m very self-conscious about my legs because of my disability, so finding a styling long dress is a bit of a nightmare because long dresses are not in style right now. But I''ll find something.

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/3/2008 9:37:28 AM
Author: purrfectpear
Your mom is right, other than the RSVP issue (which some phone calls will take care of) the rest isn''t worth stressing over.

It will all be OK. Just keep repeating that. It will all be OK.

Thank you. Yeah, my mom''s right about a llot of things lately. She''s amazing.

 

[bensbride]

Hey anchor. Sorry I''m joining this late, but I just wanted to give you some ::hugs:: and let you know that I think you made lovely, classy decisions for your own dress and for your BM dresses. I''m guessing your FSIL wants to make herself look important and special and "part" of the day, which will only end in her looking pretty goofy in a dress that doesn''t match your attendents'' dresses at all. Nobody will mistake her for a bridesmaid, it will be clear that she''s just out for attention. I wouldn''t worry about your FMIL, either. She''s an adult and will figure it out. Maybe have your FSIL take your FMIL out shopping. They both seem to be a little bit high on self-importance. Maybe it''d be a love connection.

)

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/3/2008 10:02:53 AM
Author: gwendolyn
anchor, honey, I just wanted to offer you a virtual hug and let you know that I know exactly how frustrating it is being stressed when you are telling yourself not to stress over them! And I know other people have commented on it as well, but your brother''s FI is going to look like a sore loser. I think it''s in exceedingly bad taste to look like you''re trying to steal attention away from the bride at her wedding (dressing to look good and dressing to outdo are two VERY different things), and I find it disappointing that your brother would add to your stress by informing you that his woman is going to show you up. In your place, that would''ve hurt, so I can understand how you might let it get to you, my dear. But in all honesty, she doesn''t mean anything, and if she does end up in a few photos, she might just look laughably out of place--she certainly isn''t going to affect how radiantly beautiful you will be along with your lovely bridesmaids in their elegant, classy dresses.

All the best for your mom to feel healthy and strong on the big day, and I hope you and your FI enlist some folks to help you with the calling (maid of honour and best man, maybe?). Soon, it will be over and you will be married to the love of your life, which, after all, is what all these headaches are all about.

Gwen - Thanks a lot for your support! Sorry you''re having dissertation deadline trouble it seems... Talk about stress!

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/3/2008 10:11:15 AM
Author: KimberlyH

Date: 7/3/2008 12:14:39 AM
Author: anchor31

Thank you. I needed to hear that, really. You''re right, except for my mom''s chemo, none of this really matters. As for my mom''s chemo, there''s nothing I can do about it except pray that she will be feeling well the day of my wedding, and even that will not stop her from being there.

Anchor,

I don''t know if this will help or not, but I thought of you when talking to a friend/neighbor last night. A few weeks ago, at 2:45 a.m., two days before her brothers'' wedding, she recieved a phone call that her brother, his fiance, her mother, and her father were in a car accident. Her mom was in surgery, her dad and FSIL were both admited to the hospital for broken bones and bruising and her brother was in the ICU with two punctured lungs and a variety of other injuries. Her father and FSIL were both released from the hospital the following morning; her brother underwent surgery at noon the day of the rehearsal dinner and was released to attend, her mom didn''t make it to the rehearsal but did make it to the wedding the next day, in a wheelchair, imobilized. They got married, and more importantly everyone is doing okay now, but it''s just an example of how things sometimes just don''t work out as we plan, but they do work out how they''re supposed to.

The hardest part of illness is that sometimes there is nothing we can do, and we want to fix. It stinks. I''ll send my good thoughts about her feeling well the day of, and the days surrounding your wedding (along with every day during this difficult time).

Take care of yourself, and take lots of deep breaths. You''re getting married to the love of your life, you lucky lady.

That''s an incredible story, and it does make me feel better. It''s going to happen, and it''s going to be amazing no matter what.

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/3/2008 10:33:16 AM
Author: Linda W

Date: 7/3/2008 7:41:14 AM
Author: anchor31

Date: 7/3/2008 5:55:13 AM

Author: allycat0303

I would be totally surprised if you weren''t freaking out! Ok, starting with the dress. It''s going to be ok. I don''t think anyone is going to look at dresses and compare to see who is fancier. I think that they will just have all their eyes fixed on the bride (although considering your wedding and venue that dress she picked is a little too much, but lets not dwell...) As for FIL, I know you''ve had a lot of problems with her. I think you should enlist your friends to do some bows! Or FH if possible. Obviously FIL is super unreliable. And your mom. Oh honey, there is nothing I can say about that. You must worry, and SHOULD worry. She''s your mom! Some people tolerate the Chemo really well, and some don''t. Here''s to hoping she will get through it like a champ!

That''s why I''m upset (about the chemo). They pump her full of meds so she doesn''t get sick, but she''s still sick for 4 days following the treatments. We don''t tolerate meds very well in my family. Thanks, ally.

Anchor: This is just an idea: Do you think they can postpone your mother''s last treatment until after your wedding? I used to get sick for 4 days after my chemo also. At the time it was my grandparents anniversary and I wanted to be at their party and not be sick from the chemo. My Dr. said I could have chemo the following week.

It is just an idea and I am not sure if your mother''s doctor would suggest it or not.


Linda

Well, she says she''ll be alright. She might not make it to the rehearsal dinner (Thursday before the wedding), but she''ll make it to the rehearsal, and most importantly, to the wedding. We''re having an early wedding so she won''t have to be up all night.

 

[anchor31]

Date: 7/3/2008 10:49:47 AM
Author: bensbride
Hey anchor. Sorry I''m joining this late, but I just wanted to give you some ::hugs:: and let you know that I think you made lovely, classy decisions for your own dress and for your BM dresses. I''m guessing your FSIL wants to make herself look important and special and ''part'' of the day, which will only end in her looking pretty goofy in a dress that doesn''t match your attendents'' dresses at all. Nobody will mistake her for a bridesmaid, it will be clear that she''s just out for attention. I wouldn''t worry about your FMIL, either. She''s an adult and will figure it out. Maybe have your FSIL take your FMIL out shopping. They both seem to be a little bit high on self-importance. Maybe it''d be a love connection.

)

lol Thanks for the laugh.

 

[pjean]

Date: 7/3/2008 1:15:09 AM
Author: Linda W
Anchor. That dress in GOLD, is going to be hideous looking. Reminds me of a giant Christmas tree ornament

Hah! SO true. When you give your photographer a list of the shots that are really important to you (you''re going to do that, right?) ask for at least a couple of family shots where she''s standing in the back row. Then you''ll see as little of the gold as possible.

I love your dress! It''s going to be a gorgeous wedding.

 

[gtn]

Date: 7/2/2008 10:46:33 PM
Author: mimzy
aww anchor!

if i could i would give you the biggest hug, then a foot rub, then pour you a glass of champagne (or ginger ale, whatvs)!


one thing at a time!


- put one of your bridesmaids or MOH on call duty starting tomorrow. or maybe your FI??


- not your problem! if she looks ridiculous in pictures, that''s no reflection on you. YOU''LL look fabulous

. no one is going to relate what she''s wearing to anything you''ve done.


- i bet you are better off. they''d probably look

cheesy anyways. can you enlist someone else to do this? martha stewart bows!


- i''m sorry about your mom, BUT you know it''s ultimately for the best for her and what could be better than that?

- you had to argue, but it''s over!


- WOW. this is laughable! i would let him know that it isn''t appropriate and that you''re only letting him know to save her from embarrassment. if she doesn''t listen to him, then again, it''s her that''s going to look ridiculous, not you


i''m sorry people aren''t stepping up for you anchor

but despite that i know that your day is going to be wonderful and nobody is going to ruin it for you as long as you don''t let them. keep your chin up!

ditto. You are not being a bridezilla