So I''ve decided...I''m not picking her ring for her

[captainobvious]

At first I thought I would propose with a ring I thought she would really love. I searched all over and found a couple that really stood out to me. Of course though with a budget of $3500, stone and setting combos in the traditional B&M stores just werent living up to expectations. Online retailers and Ebayers are hit and miss, so I decided to do some research. Turns out that I can afford a pretty awesome diamond (H&A, ACA) in a respectable size which I never would have known since I honestly had never heard about it until joining this forum. This site truly is a fantastic resource.
Well, after reading through some of the proposal threads, specifically the "Did you let her choose her ring" thread, I have flip-flopped and decided that I''m going to take a different route. I think Picking out her stone and setting together would be a very special experience and something that we would have alot of fun doing together. Plus the fact that I want her to have the perfect ring for her, not for me.

I still plan on proposing in the coming days, but it will be with another surprise ring. I picked up a beautiful blue topaz ring from Na Hoku (Hawaiian Fine Jeweler) and plan on popping the question with that, and then of course letting her know that we will be taking the wonderful ride of choosing the perfect Ering for her, together.

I honestly would have ended up putting an inferior, less valuable and less appealing stone on her hand if it weren''t for finding this site. You guys are terrific

Thanks to all of you for your help thus far (you''ll be hearing from me again at diamond selection time), and Merry Christmas!

ETA- Pics of the topaz ring will be posted with hand shots on/after Christmas.

 

[Ellen]

Aw, how truly thoughtful of you.

I think you're right, in that it will be much fun, while building a very special memory, to pick everything out together!

And that's great you got her another ring, 2 for 1 special.

Can't wait for all the hand shots!!

 

[erica k]

i think that''s a wonderful plan! you sound like such a considerate and thoughtful person. i can''t wait to see how things turn out with the ring. and i''d love to see photos of the topaz ring, too!

 

[captainobvious]

Thanks guys. I appreciate the kind words.

She and I are both heading out of the house today seperately, so if I get back before her, I''l snap a couple shots of the ring to wet your beak

 

[BriBee]

You sound really sweet and thoughtful. I''m sure she''s going to love the Topaz and then have a great time picking the e-ring with you. I''m glad this is a happy thread because your title is cut off on the forum so I read "I''ve decided I''m not picking her" and then it cut off! I was thinking, oh no! A break-up? But I''m glad it was the complete opposite!

 

[portia]

I think that is a fantastic idea! My husband and I did that. We''re very non-traditional, but that works for us. We took several weekend trips looking for stones and rings. We had so much fun and we cherish the memories. We went ring shopping downtown Chicago and had a great time walking up and down Michigan Ave. We''d always end the day having dinner at the one of the restaurants there. Everytime we eat there now we remember how much fun we had. Starting out, I was really set on what I wanted and then ended up getting something completely different because we *both* fell in love with it together. So it worked perfect for us... I got what I wanted, but he helped me make the final decision. When either of us looks at the ring now (which is pretty much all the time for me since I love my ring), we both smile and remember that it''s something we did together.

Have fun and please be sure to share some pics!

 

[dani13]

MH and I did the exact same thing that Portia and her husband did. We made several day trips into NYC together to pick out my e-ring....and it was such a wonderful experience that we both look back fondly on....MH knows me well enough to know that I am particular about EVERYTHING, especially my jewelry!!!! In both of our minds, it was just too much money to spend to not know if I would be completely happy with the end product...Once the stone and setting details were finalized though, I left the proposal up to him, and he made it a complete surprise! It was perfect!

I completely agree with your plan, I think its very thoughtful of you to want to make sure she is 100% happy with an e-ring that she has to wear on her hand for a very long time.....Best of luck!!!!

And remember to post pics!!!

 

[Jenn5504]

My husband has let me pick out both of my erings (original and replacement following a stone break...). I''m SO glad he let me take part in the decision! Congrats, you and your future wife will have a wonderful time doing this together!

 

[dtnyc]

It''s great that you have a plan-
also the blue topaz ring will be a lovely "something blue" she can wear on your wedding day!

 

[bee*]

great idea! I picked out my ring with D and it was so romantic picking it out together and we had such a great time doing it! Best of luck with the proposal!

 

[KimberlyH]

DH and I picked my center stone and setting out together. It was such a great experience! I think you''ll be glad you''re going this route. Looking forward to seeing the topaz ring, sounds beautiful!

 

[captainobvious]

Doh!
Forgot that they gift wrapped the box in the store...

I guess you''ll have to settle for ths until tomorrow

 

[orangemonster]

CONGRATULATIONS! In my opinion, you picked the perfect way to choose a ring!
My (now) Hubby and I decided to look for the stone together and the setting. It was very special as we found something we both loved! The trick was, I did not get to see the ''finished'' ring until the day he proposed (a surprise and perfect!). The ring was more magnificent than I ever imagined!
I love your story and wish you much happiness with your engagement!

 

[Angel7]

Congrats! I think that is a GREAT idea! Plus, she gets a beautiful topaz!

Can''t wait to see pics once she unwraps that present!

 

[Fly Girl]

We also picked out my engagement ring (actually I got a wedding set, e-ring and w-ring matched...this was quite a few years ago!) together. That is a great way to do it, and I highly recommend it.

Good luck on the proposal. I think she will like the topaz ring as well.

 

[rainydaze]

i think that is a wonderful idea! it is the best of all worlds, and you are right - the experience of choosing together will be special in itself, and will make the ring all the more special to her.

best wishes for your proposal, and i cannot wait to see the topaz! (love that idea too!)

 

[stbfyffe]

I''m glad that my post changed your mind. i''m sure you will enjoy picking out the ring together.

 

[marcy]

What a thoughtful and great idea. I am sure she''ll adore the ring and love getting to help pick our the perfect ering.

 

[captainobvious]

Im getting nervous, so I''m passing the time on PS.

She''ll be here in about an hour, and she''s going to enter the door to a candle-lit living room and a special surprise. I dont want to spoil it for you all just yet though, but stay tuned

 

[bee*]

oooh how exciting!! Best of luck with the proposal-looking forward to pics!

 

[captainobvious]

She said YES !!

Here are the (many) pics I shot for you guys. Enjoy

 

[captainobvious]

Pic 2

 

[captainobvious]

pic 3

 

[captainobvious]

pic 4

 

[captainobvious]

pic 5, still going...

 

[captainobvious]

pic 6

 

[captainobvious]

Last one... Hope you guys dont mind me posting so many pics

 

[captainobvious]

So the ring is a pretty heavy chunk of solid 14K white gold. The ring is shiny everywhere except for the large grooves on the shank which have a satin/matte finish. It has 3 tiny accent diamonds on each side of the shank and the topaz speaks for itself. It really is a brilliant stone!

 

[coatimundi_org]

Congratulations!

That topaz is beautiful!
You''re very thoughtful too!

 

[DMBsGirl]

omg that ring is so gorgeous i''d be tempted to keep it as my e-ring!