Size Queen?

[IrishEyes08]

Hi Girls,

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season, very exciting that so many of us got engaged!!

So, over the weekend BF and I were shopping for a gift for someone and happened upon a large display of oval solitaires. I was very excited because we hadn''t seen so many together in any other stores and we decided to try a few on. I know he has his mind sent on a 1 ct oval and I have to say (and am a bit ashamed to say it), but 1 ct seems a wee bit small on my hand.

I feel awful even typing that. Seriously.

I don''t know if it''s my age (30), my occupation where I am surrounded by giant rocks, or that I live on Long Island which is a very money conscious area, but I had a twinge of.... "What about the 1.5er over there????"

How do I get over this? I don''t want my sweet BF to go into debt over an engagement ring, and I know I''ll love any ring he chooses, but I''d like to take steps now to get these evil thoughts out of my head. Sooooo.... any ideas how to do that?

Gosh I sound like such a brat.

 

[Italiahaircolor]

Have you ever been shopping for a car before with a firm budget? You know how when you''re at the dealership and they have some amazing things and options, and all the cars are shiny and fresh and flashy...and while you''re shopping for your new car, you''re always able to find a nicer model with bigger options, and once you see a few of those really nice cars suddenly what you can afford seems a little cheap or underrated? But then suddenly, when you pull off the lot in your brand new car that smells goods, and drives nice, and is shinny is your favorite color, you fall in love with it like it''s the greatest thing since sliced bread??? Thats'' like ring shopping.

When you''re in the middle of big bling at a jewelry store, sure 1ct gets a bit dwarfed. But the minute you''re away from it, and you have a lovely 1ct on your finger, that 1ct will look huge, and sparkle like crazy...it''ll be perfect, but you''re seeing it in the wrong atmosphere to truly appreciate it.

IMO an engagement ring is nothing to go into debt over. Its a symbol, not the marriage. A 1 carat is a perfectly respectable size stone, and an oval is a beautiful cut...it''ll be great.

 

[IrishEyes08]

That was the ideal analogy, THANK YOU!

Especially since I am about to buy a new car, lol. I know that I was swept up with all the bigger, blingy rings surrounding me. And once I get the ring he selected for me I am going to adore it, I just needed someone to bring me back down to earth.

Thank you for your post, it really helped.

 

[~*Alexis*~]

I had the same thought when I tried on the 1.21 emerald cut that FFI was looking at getting....it a TINY on my hand....

But its what he wanted but I told him about diamond shrinkage and let him know that there would be an upgrade....EVENTUALLY....he was ok with that....just not within the first 5 years.

But I told him how I felt and he understood and he was ok with the possibility of getting a smaller looking band to make the ring pop...

have you tried looking at consignment shops? Sometimes you can get a decent deal on a used stone rather than a "new" stone...go down in color a little and you might be able to get a cheaper stone (but not down on cut or clarity)

There are options out there...perhaps you can pay for the setting and he can pay for the stone?

 

[Rhea]

With a previous bf, I got used to the idea of a .75-1 carat pear or oval. When DH and I started looking we could afford a bit under .5 carats (and no upgrades says DH). If you can contribute, that''s a good idea. I didn''t think to contribute, but I did pick out my own wedding band so I have a look I like a lot.

I think the new car analogy is a good one.

 

[sammyj]

IHC, I love your analogy!!

IrishEyes...don''t kick yourself over this! First, your personal preference of the size of your diamond is greatly affected by your ring size (which I don''t think you mentioned)...

Second, I definitely think most people''s preferences are shaped by their environment. If you''re surrounded by big rocks and all you ever see are big rocks, then yes, it''s somewhat natural that you think something smaller is actually smaller.

Third, being a PSer, we all know that cut is king!!! Don''t focus on the size of the rock and worry about the sparkle. If it sparkles like crazy then I''m sure you wouldn''t think twice about the actual carat weight.

I told me BF the other day that I could care less how big my diamond was as long as it sparkled like mad.

 

[IrishEyes08]

These are all really good points. For reference, my ring size is 6.25.

I definitely agree that quality over quantity is so important, I think I just had momenty size-itis. I am feeling much better about things.

Also, I am contributing some to the ring, however it was agreed that BF would make the decision as to the stone/size which is fine with me. We shopped together, he has ideas about what I like and I want to step back and have him make the final decision on his own. I am actually really looking forward to seeing what he ultimately selects.

Thanks again for letting me vent ladies!

 

[Miscka]

Italia I LOVE the way you phrased that. Excellent analogy!

 

[MissDimity]

Have you thought of a different cut of diamond i.e Pear, Marquise ?, as these shapes have a larger size per carat. Here is the link to a downloadable pdf which compares diamond size vs cut.
http://images.amazon.com/media/i3d/01/actual-diamond-size.pdf

Or again, if size is an issue, having a diamond set in a bezel or diamond halo, which would make the diamond appear larger?

Last, tip (which I am sure you probably know already) the thinner the band the larger the diamond will appear.

 

[tlh]

Well... if you dont want to go into debt now... dont... maybe you could upgrade after a year or two? But if it feels small now... it always will. So what are your thoughts on the upgrade?

Honestly my hubby surprised me w/ a ? pop... and I did everything I could to make the center stone look bigger. 1ct just was not big enough... still isn''t. We''ll be upgrading secretly (we dont want others to know what a spoiled brat I am) in a few more months.

I am glad he proposed when he did... but honestly wish he would have gone lower in clarity- and bigger on carat weight. But.. how would he know, I like you never voiced that size matters until after he bought the ring... after we were married.

Glad he bought it from a store w/ a trade in policy! So anywho.. good luck... but dont keep it quiet. Seriously, you might regret it!

 

[that_someone_special]

Date: 1/5/2009 10:53:17 AM
Author: Italiahaircolor
Have you ever been shopping for a car before with a firm budget? You know how when you''re at the dealership and they have some amazing things and options, and all the cars are shiny and fresh and flashy...and while you''re shopping for your new car, you''re always able to find a nicer model with bigger options, and once you see a few of those really nice cars suddenly what you can afford seems a little cheap or underrated? But then suddenly, when you pull off the lot in your brand new car that smells goods, and drives nice, and is shinny is your favorite color, you fall in love with it like it''s the greatest thing since sliced bread??? Thats'' like ring shopping.

When you''re in the middle of big bling at a jewelry store, sure 1ct gets a bit dwarfed. But the minute you''re away from it, and you have a lovely 1ct on your finger, that 1ct will look huge, and sparkle like crazy...it''ll be perfect, but you''re seeing it in the wrong atmosphere to truly appreciate it.

IMO an engagement ring is nothing to go into debt over. Its a symbol, not the marriage. A 1 carat is a perfectly respectable size stone, and an oval is a beautiful cut...it''ll be great.

Yeah. This was great advice-- even for me. Well said.