Should I say anything? my daughter's bf bought her a..

[Dancing Fire]

GIA XXX .91ct H VS2 steep/deep ring from his jeweler friend. He showed me the ring and the copy of the GIA report then asked me what is my opinion on the stone?...I said wellll... the stone is a little too deep at 62.4%, crown is 36' X 40.8' pavil. ..

In the past I have had told both of their BFs when you guys are ready to buy a stone please let me know and I will point you guys to a few excellent online vendors, but DD#1 's bf wanted to be a hero and now my daughter will end up with a steep/deep rb. One positive note about this ring is that he didn't go to Zale or Kay's jeweler and purchase one of their $1999 1ct week end specials.

Anyhoo, Should I tell him to find a better cut stone? ..My wife said...JUST KEEP YOUR BIG MOUTH SHUT ..

 

[VRBeauty]

My wife said...JUST KEEP YOUR BIG MOUTH SHUT ..

Sorry, but I agree with your wife. Other than offering your congratulations (assuming this is an engagement ring) keep your opinion to yourself. You've already offered the bf your assistance and he decided not to ask for your help. At this point any decision concerning the ring is your daughter's to make.

ETA - your daughter's happiness, and your relationship with your potential future SIL, are far more important than any diamond could be.

 

[Gypsy]

KEEP YOUR BIG MOUTH SHUT.

 

[treasurehunter]

Its not that bad.. he could have got a 36 crown angle with a 41 pavilion angle.. and still GIA ex . .

 

[ForteKitty]

It's okay, she can upgrade in a few years.

 

[Dancing Fire]

I said it to their BFs many times, rule #1...don't buy diamonds from a jeweler friend!

I'm not saying his jeweler friend screwed him on purpose. He may or may not know anything about well cut stones. The GIA report say Ex, Ex, Ex., maybe that's all he care about.

 

[Dancing Fire]

It's okay, she can upgrade in a few years.

Don't know if the store offer any kind of upgrade policy. Anyhow, I think my daughter will never upgrade her original E-ring.

 

[MMtwo]

You'll know...
Daughter will think it is the most amazing, sparkly, FABULOUS diamonds ever. It may not be excellent, only "good" but at least it is not one of those 1999 weekend specials. Smile and say, "it's lovely sweetie" That is what your baby girl deserves...daddy's approval. Honestly, kinda good on him for moving without you. That's what a "man" would do. He is showing you he can care for your daughter...it's sweet. He came to you for blessing and approval. Aweeee.

Boundary Advice:
That steep deep issue is your problem, not theirs. They're happy.

If he asks for help - jump into action!

 

[dk168]

I agree with DF's wife too.

DK

 

[Laila619]

DF, it's actually not that bad of a cut. Believe me, it could be far worse!

 

[Karl_K]

I dunno do you really want your daughter marrying someone who would buy a steep/deep?

Just kidding!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

Seriously, there are far more important things to worry about.
If he is an otherwise good guy just let it go.

 

[kenny]

GIA XXX .91ct H VS2 steep/deep ring from his jeweler friend. He showed me the ring and the copy of the GIA report then asked me what is my opinion on the stone?...I said wellll... the stone is a little too deep at 62.4%, crown is 36' X 40.8' pavil. ..

In the past I have had told both of their BFs when you guys are ready to buy a stone please let me know and I will point you guys to a few excellent online vendors, but DD#1 's bf wanted to be a hero and now my daughter will end up with a steep/deep rb. One positive note about this ring is that he didn't go to Zale or Kay's jeweler and purchase one of their $1999 1ct week end specials.

Anyhoo, Should I tell him to find a better cut stone? ..My wife said...JUST KEEP YOUR BIG MOUTH SHUT ..

If he bought it, asked your opinion and has not shown it to your daughter, and can return it I'd definitely give him Diamond Cut 101.
Don't tell him to return it.
Just educate him on cut.

He'll figure out the return thing if he gets educated.

 

[Dancing Fire]

I dunno do you really want your daughter marrying someone who would buy a steep/deep?

Just kidding!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

Seriously, there are far more important things to worry about.
If he is an otherwise good guy just let it go.

Do I have a choice?...
There are more important things than diamonds?...

 

[Dancing Fire]

GIA XXX .91ct H VS2 steep/deep ring from his jeweler friend. He showed me the ring and the copy of the GIA report then asked me what is my opinion on the stone?...I said wellll... the stone is a little too deep at 62.4%, crown is 36' X 40.8' pavil. ..

In the past I have had told both of their BFs when you guys are ready to buy a stone please let me know and I will point you guys to a few excellent online vendors, but DD#1 's bf wanted to be a hero and now my daughter will end up with a steep/deep rb. One positive note about this ring is that he didn't go to Zale or Kay's jeweler and purchase one of their $1999 1ct week end specials.

Anyhoo, Should I tell him to find a better cut stone? ..My wife said...JUST KEEP YOUR BIG MOUTH SHUT ..

If he bought it, asked your opinion and has not shown it to your daughter, and can return it I'd definitely give him Diamond Cut 101.
Don't tell him to return it.
Just educate him on cut.

He'll figure out the return thing if he gets educated.

I'll have him talk to you...better for it to come from a stranger's mouth then his future FIL's mouth...

 

[Dancing Fire]

DF, it's actually not that bad of a cut. Believe me, it could be far worse!

Yes, could have been a $1999 salt and pepper special from Zales... I would have an instant heart attack

 

[kenny]

Normally I'd say keep your mouth shut.
But this is a unique exception.

So, every time you and your daughter are together you'll be wearing a 4th of July fireworks show and she'll be wearing a steep deep.
I think she's gonna be disappointed.

If you love super diamond performance and love your daughter, how can you hang with this?
It wouldn't be so bad if you weren't getting an Octavia.

I think the contrast in light performance is going to be an elephant in the room, forever.
Her hubby may feel bad cause he'll notice it too.

 

[missy]

DF, can your daughter's FI to be (congrats by the way!!!) return the diamond? If so I would tell him (as gently and nicely as possible) and help guide him towards the best for his budget. If I was your dd I would want that help from you because in this case ignorance is not bliss. From my perspective as the daughter I would say butt in (gently) and don't let her get an ER diamond dud. I know the prevailing advice here is MYOB but I disagree in this case. Good luck and best wishes on your dd engagement!

 

[Lorelei]

My feeling is keep your trap shut DF and let your daughter's fiancé handle this, I know it's hard and I would be biting my fist if it were my daughter in this situation but the stone might not be bad at all depending on a few factors. Plus it's a pride thing, he might not appreciate you putting your 5 cents in my American BF. You already told your daughters' BFs to let you know if they are going to buy rings to let you know and you would help, but it seems your SIL to be wanted to do it his way and if he wanted your help, he would have asked for it.

 

[missy]

Ask yourselves this. For those of us who didn't find Pricescope till after we had our original ER how many of us wish we could have gone back in time and redo our first choice and save money and get a better diamond? I think the answer would be an overwhelming majority of us would have preferred to have found the info PS has before we made that first big ER purchase...I am just saying it is something to consider. If done properly the bf/FI doesn't need to be offended or insulted by DF's offer of info.

 

[MissGotRocks]

It's hard to stand by and watch someone spend money on something when you know they could have done better. However, you really don't want to offend him and start off on bad footing. You had offered and he decided to do it on his own. Young people can be headstrong like that and we were probably all like that at one time. Lots of us got less than optimally cut diamonds in our day - who knew any better?

Only you know what your relationship is with him and how he might take some words of advice AFTER the purchase. It is probably a pretty stone despite not being ideally cut so if she's happy and he's happy. . . the only difference is that you and your wife have gorgeous diamonds - will she want to compare hers to yours? If so, she might see the difference. Tough call!

 

[Tourmaline]

This is dangerous territory. You could create resentment that never goes away. Did you actually tell him that it was too steep? Or did you just want to do so?

 

[missy]

Just to be clear. If the ring can be returned I would say something and DF's post leads me to believe it can be returned. If it cannot be returned I would keep quiet and know the future was/is made for upgrading.

 

[dk168]

IMHO, it is better to be told "You could have said something..." than to be resented as an interfering/controlling parent.

DK

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I am just glad it is a XXX. Otherwise, I really might have to say something. He could have done sooo much worse, DF!

My son-in-law did come to me for help and I am glad he did. A few months ago, his brother contacted me for help, too!!!

You know, this would be a great time to have had a idealscope handy. All you'd have to say is, let's take a look and see if it has any leakage. Then when he sees it, you can explain the dimensions that usually avoid that.

 

[Lorelei]

Another point to ponder might be this...Your SIL to be knows you have a lot of diamond knowledge DF and maybe he wanted to do this himself to prove to you he could pick out a worthy rock for your daughter...? I am not saying it is the reason why he wanted to do this himself, but it might be part of it.

 

[TC1987]

GIA XXX .91ct H VS2 steep/deep ring from his jeweler friend. He showed me the ring and the copy of the GIA report then asked me what is my opinion on the stone?...I said wellll... the stone is a little too deep at 62.4%, crown is 36' X 40.8' pavil. ..

Apparently you already said that it's a bit steep and deep. Hope that made him a little curious to find out what you meant, and he'll do more research and exchange the stone. Otherwise, I think you'll just have to wait until daughter gets the ring and gives it the 3rd degree. If she decides it's not good enough cut, then I predict she will get something done about it, right? This could be an expensive lesson for the BF. Men will research the purchase of a $700 TV to death, but will make a major e-ring purchase based on 20 minutes of what a salesperson says? Oh well. Live and learn. I just hope there isn't a big blowup.

 

[Niel]

Angles could be better but my stone is 62.4 and I regret nothing!

Let it lie!

 

[Dancing Fire]

Normally I'd say keep your mouth shut.
But this is a unique exception.

So, every time you and your daughter are together you'll be wearing a 4th of July fireworks show and she'll be wearing a steep deep.
I think she's gonna be disappointed.

If you love super diamond performance and love your daughter, how can you hang with this?
It wouldn't be so bad if you weren't getting an Octavia.

I think the contrast in light performance is going to be an elephant in the room, forever.
Her hubby may feel bad cause he'll notice it too.

I can't ...why you think I'm up at 5:30 am?..

 

[Dancing Fire]

DF, can your daughter's FI to be (congrats by the way!!!) return the diamond? If so I would tell him (as gently and nicely as possible) and help guide him towards the best for his budget. If I was your dd I would want that help from you because in this case ignorance is not bliss. From my perspective as the daughter I would say butt in (gently) and don't let her get an ER diamond dud. I know the prevailing advice here is MYOB but I disagree in this case. Good luck and best wishes on your dd engagement!

Here's the best possible scenario...after he proposes this weekend, and IF my daughter ask me the Q ..daddy what do you think about my ring? then my first Q to DD would be... why? can he still refund or exchange the stone?.. ..otherwise my wife will be pissed if I said something negative about her ring.

 

[pandabee]

Ooh DF...this is certainly tricky. I think it all comes down to the relationship you have with your future son in law...how did he take it when you told him the stone was kind of steep/deep? Hopefully like others have said that will prompt him to do a bit more research since you did not overwhelmingly give the stone a passing grade but I think Lorelai may be right in that he wanted to prove that he could find a good performing stone without help from a diamond aficionado like yourself.