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She knows when I'm proposing, how to make it special

MLM123

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 14, 2019
Messages
38
My Fiance and I both travel a lot for work, we wont have much time together for the next several months so I'm proposing next weekend. She's my best friend so we talk about everything, so I'm lousy at keeping secrets. She knows I have the ring. She knows I'm proposing next weekend (we've already booked the honeymoon in Cancun )

Any ideas on how to wow and surprise her when she knows it's coming?
 
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foxinsox

Ideal_Rock
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Jul 18, 2015
Messages
2,922
Don’t propose next weekend, do it randomly this coming week like while you’re cleaning up after dinner, going to bed or when you’re just hanging out together if you want it to be a surprise.
 

mizzbutterfly

Rough_Rock
Joined
Apr 19, 2018
Messages
27
I agree with foxinsox. Don’t propose next weekend. Perhaps do it a day before she is anticipating the proposal? Doing it afterwards may introduce some unnecessary anxiety.

Unless she doesn’t like surprises... in which case do it when she is expecting, but while doing something “random”. Suggest going to get coffee and then a walk? Or get her a pair of shoes or something and ask her to wear it before going out to your “special evening” but then have the ring in the shoe box? Or none of these ideas, but something to still catch her off guard.
Just some thoughts...
 

OoohShiny

Ideal_Rock
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Apr 25, 2014
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6,681
I agree with foxinsox. Don’t propose next weekend. Perhaps do it a day before she is anticipating the proposal? Doing it afterwards may introduce some unnecessary anxiety.

Unless she doesn’t like surprises... in which case do it when she is expecting, but while doing something “random”. Suggest going to get coffee and then a walk? Or get her a pair of shoes or something and ask her to wear it before going out to your “special evening” but then have the ring in the shoe box? Or none of these ideas, but something to still catch her off guard.
Just some thoughts...
+1 to this - my good lady stresses massively if things don't go as she expects :rolleyes: :lol:


Do you travel together? On a plane? You could whisper it into her ear as you watch a sunrise through the window :)

Or you could wire up some hidden fairy lights in the garden while she's out, then tell her to come out and look at something when it's dark, so you can switch the fairy lights on and propose under the stars just before bed :)
 

MLM123

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 14, 2019
Messages
38
Great suggestions, thanks! We only have a 5 day window to be together in April. I won't see her again until June. We'll both be flying home from separate trips the same day. I'm picking her up from the Airport a few hours after I land.

I like the idea of doing something at home, If I take her somewhere special it will telegraph the proposal even more. You gave me some ideas:
  • We have a large garden in the back yard (empty, we have 4 seasons here). I could spell out a Marry me message inside them
  • I could do a marry me message in Christmas lights in the back yard, or have them lit up on the front of the house when we pull in the driveway form the airport.
  • I could decorate our bedroom with flowers, balloons, marry me messages, etc. We'll be getting home late from the airport and heading right to bed.
Please keep the suggestions coming.
 

OoohShiny

Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Apr 25, 2014
Messages
6,681
Ooh, I forgot - a friend of mine put the ring on a kitten's collar and then presented the kitten as a surprise, with the added extra surprise of the ring and proposal - you could substitute the kitten for a teddybear on the pillow while she's cleaning her teeth before bed, and see how long it takes her to notice the surprise addition :)) lol

I guess a lot depends on what sort of person she is - will she like an intimate proposal with just the two of you, or does she prefer huge displays in public with a flashmob of choreographed dancers, a videographer and a facebook live feed? lol
 
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MLM123

Rough_Rock
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Mar 14, 2019
Messages
38
Ooh, I forgot - a friend of mine put the ring on a kitten's collar and then presented the kitten as a surprise, with the added extra surprise of the ring and proposal - you could substitute the kitten for a teddybear on the pillow while she's cleaning her teeth before bed, and see how long it takes her to notice the surprise addition :)) lol

I guess a lot depends on what sort of person she is - will she like an intimate proposal with just the two of you, or does she prefer huge displays in public with a flashmob of choreographed dancers, a videographer and a facebook live feed? lol
We're pretty private people. I think she'll appreciate something more intimate.

When dating early on I passed her a silly note that said something like " I like you, do you like me" with yes and no check boxes. Like little kids do. She still has it and brings it up now and then.

I was thinking about passing her a note with something like " I love you, will you marry me?" with the same check boxes. Too boring?
 

cmd2014

Ideal_Rock
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Aug 6, 2014
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2,440
We're pretty private people. I think she'll appreciate something more intimate.

When dating early on I passed her a silly note that said something like " I like you, do you like me" with yes and no check boxes. Like little kids do. She still has it and brings it up now and then.

I was thinking about passing her a note with something like " I love you, will you marry me?" with the same check boxes. Too boring?
No, I think that's really sweet, and a nice call back to the start of your relationship. I actually think low key, intimate proposals are the nicest.
 

jamesallenrings

Rough_Rock
Trade
Joined
Jul 5, 2016
Messages
88
We're pretty private people. I think she'll appreciate something more intimate.

When dating early on I passed her a silly note that said something like " I like you, do you like me" with yes and no check boxes. Like little kids do. She still has it and brings it up now and then.

I was thinking about passing her a note with something like " I love you, will you marry me?" with the same check boxes. Too boring?
This is a brilliant idea! So personal and detailed.

Also wondering if you could find some way to set both of the notes next to one another, like in a picture frame or on the inside of a jewelry box. It could be a nice way to symbolize your journey together.
 

bludiva

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 23, 2017
Messages
1,995
We're pretty private people. I think she'll appreciate something more intimate.

When dating early on I passed her a silly note that said something like " I like you, do you like me" with yes and no check boxes. Like little kids do. She still has it and brings it up now and then.

I was thinking about passing her a note with something like " I love you, will you marry me?" with the same check boxes. Too boring?
This is such a cute idea. I love the teddy bear too if there is something like that she would appreciate you could combine both.....like a stuffed animal, toy, book, whatever she would like and hidden somewhere is the note and when she opens the note you can present her with the ring. Whatever you choose, I'm sure she will love it and congratulations!
 

seaurchin

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 2, 2012
Messages
900
I'd skip the backyard stuff because it's weather-dependent.

LOVE the note idea. I'd go for that in the decorated bedroom, if you have time. Please remember to get down on one knee, it's so romantic!

Also, I would not do it before she expects it. All just personal opinion of course but I would rather be proposed to when I've had a chance to do my hair, makeup, nails etc. suitable to the momentous occasion.

I agree with you on keeping it private. Whenever I see a proposal in public, I do kinda cringe, to be honest. I personally would hate a public display, whether in front of friends and family or strangers.Then again, that's just me. More importantly, congratulations!
 

bludiva

Brilliant_Rock
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Also, I would not do it before she expects it. All just personal opinion of course but I would rather be proposed to when I've had a chance to do my hair, makeup, nails etc. suitable to the momentous occasion.
i actually would prefer the surprise personally... she can always get all dolled up after to go out and celebrate and you could even take her for a manicure so she has her "nails did" in the photos she will most likely want to share w/ friends & family =) you know her best so i will stop adding suggestions ...let us know how it goes!
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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28,607
i actually would prefer the surprise personally... she can always get all dolled up after to go out and celebrate and you could even take her for a manicure so she has her "nails did" in the photos she will most likely want to share w/ friends & family =) you know her best so i will stop adding suggestions ...let us know how it goes!
Me too! My dh proposed when I was a wreck and during a snowstorm blizzard outside. I literally had unwashed hair, torn jeans and no makeup on at all. And it was perfect. For us.

You know your girl. If she wants a surprise make it a surprise. And as @bludiva wrote she can always get dressed up and made up later when you go out and formally celebrate.

And I agree with @seaurchin private proposal all the way! Sounds like you are similar in that a public proposal is not your cup of tea. I would have been super embarrassed if my dh did it publicly but he knew/knows me so well and knew that was not an option.
Good luck and please come back with photos.:appl:
 

MLM123

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 14, 2019
Messages
38
Wow, thanks all with helping me get this right. Here's what i'm thinking I'll go all out decorating the bedroom. Chocolate on the pillows and nightstands flowers everywhere, tons of candles maybe balloons, stuffed animals, the works.

I'll pick her up from the airport, we'll be home really late. When we get home and head toward the bedroom (the door will be closed). I'll stop in the hallway and give her the note, let her read it and drop to one knee and give her the ring.

When she says yes and after the hugs and kisses open the bedroom door That should surprise her. I think she'll love waking up the next morning with our room decked out and a ring on her finger.
 

OoohShiny

Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Apr 25, 2014
Messages
6,681
Wow, thanks all with helping me get this right. Here's what i'm thinking I'll go all out decorating the bedroom. Chocolate on the pillows and nightstands flowers everywhere, tons of candles maybe balloons, stuffed animals, the works.

I'll pick her up from the airport, we'll be home really late. When we get home and head toward the bedroom (the door will be closed). I'll stop in the hallway and give her the note, let her read it and drop to one knee and give her the ring.

When she says yes and after the hugs and kisses open the bedroom door That should surprise her. I think she'll love waking up the next morning with our room decked out and a ring on her finger.
I hear candles... i think fire risk... lol

(Personal experience when younger!!)

Maybe fairylights would be lower risk (and easier to light up quickly)?


You could open the door when she's finished reading the note, *then* drop to one knee with the romantic backdrop behind you?


Just my thoughts anyway! :)
 
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cmd2014

Ideal_Rock
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Aug 6, 2014
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2,440
I was also thinking “wait...how are the candles getting lit?” You shouldn’t light them and leave them unattended, and I imagine it would be tough to run in and light them without her noticing. Maybe invest in some flameless battery operated ones,
.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Jun 8, 2008
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28,607
Honestly any way you go about this she will love it because the effort and love you are putting into this will show. And your words (as well as actions) will be what she remembers. All these years later I remember what my DH said when he proposed. How he couldn't imagine living his life without me to share it...those were the sweetest words I ever heard and to this day they make me tingle in a good way. Good luck and congratulations on finding the love of your life to share life with. Life shared with your soul mate and true love is life sweeter than any other IMO.
 

mizzbutterfly

Rough_Rock
Joined
Apr 19, 2018
Messages
27
I agree with everyones comments: please find an alternative to real candles. There are some battery ones that flicker literally just like a real candle. Or you can get string lights (also battery operated) and put them in cute little bowls/jars or something: https://pin.it/e3qxmrt2yrnn34

This is going to be very romantic. I'm sure you guys will remember this special moment for years to come.
 

MLM123

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 14, 2019
Messages
38
This is a brilliant idea! So personal and detailed.

Also wondering if you could find some way to set both of the notes next to one another, like in a picture frame or on the inside of a jewelry box. It could be a nice way to symbolize your journey together.
Love the idea, 1st anniversary present shopping....done

Also, I'll go with unlit candles :doh:
 

LinSF

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Aug 21, 2018
Messages
427
We'd love an update! We want to hear how much she loved it!
 

Bron357

Ideal_Rock
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Jan 22, 2014
Messages
3,773
Ooooo I’m excited too!:appl:
Love the idea of a little note with “check boxes” - perfect.
Then you must have both that note and the original one framed as a lasting momento. That so the kids (later on!) can go “ahhhhhh” once they get old enough not to go “uggghhhh”!
 

MLM123

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 14, 2019
Messages
38
Ooooo I’m excited too!:appl:
Love the idea of a little note with “check boxes” - perfect.
Then you must have both that note and the original one framed as a lasting momento. That so the kids (later on!) can go “ahhhhhh” once they get old enough not to go “uggghhhh”!


Bite your tongue! We're in our late 40's with 4 grown kids between us :wall:. The baby factory is closed, but looking forward to grandkids someday, as long as we can send them home after sugaring them up :tongue:
 

elizabethess

Shiny_Rock
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Feb 18, 2016
Messages
391
I'll pick her up from the airport, we'll be home really late. When we get home and head toward the bedroom (the door will be closed). I'll stop in the hallway and give her the note, let her read it and drop to one knee and give her the ring.
What I especially like about this idea is the proposal is taken care of at the beginning of your time together and isn't hanging over either of your heads. And you'll have plenty of time to celebrate and feel lovey-dovey the rest of the time, hopefully stress-free :)
 
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