Find your diamond
Find your jewelry
shape
carat
color
clarity

Second thoughts on engagement ring... Advice please!

B

birdietime

Rough_Rock
Joined
May 3, 2012
Messages
13
After months of reading all types of information regarding diamonds, I thought I had it figured out to this RB 1.11 E SI1 GIA X X X with H&A. However during my many discussions with friends they keep asking, why not trade some of the excellents and color for size. Then I started second guessing myself on my choice of going with the "perfect diamond" for the "perfect lady". This is a disaster since I'm trying to have the ring ready this week to propose over our Memorial Day weekend trip to Santa Barbra... and thought I did until my friends collectively started saying the same thing! My SO and I have not really discussed her dream engagement ring much and so I searched for what I thought was best for the budget in mind ($9,000 up from $7,500).

Could I get some input please I would like to know which you would prefer a diamond that is excellent in every way or a bigger not so excellent diamond. I'm thinking 1.3-1.5 H-J SI1-2 VG cut maybe have to go into K color to fit budget I definitely want it eye clean. Any advice from this community would be greatly appreciated.

Btw the setting would be a 4 prong white gold solitare. And here is my last post with photos of the diamond just as a reference.

[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/help-is-this-a-excellent-diamond-for-a-good-price.175532/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/help-is-this-a-excellent-diamond-for-a-good-price.175532/[/URL]
 
I'm not a diamond pro, but if I were the one wearing the ring, I wouldn't trade the E for a K. Maybe for an H at the lowest. And I wouldn't trade down the cut, I don't think. The stone you have is probably beautiful and perfect, don't stress! Good luck!
 
Personally I don't need the cream of the crop perfect H&A diamond to be happy. I would rather have more size than a perfect cut stone. I have a GIA excellent cut very good on sym and polish RB that looks just as good to my eyes as my whiteflash hearts and arrows ACA diamond. Let vendors know what you are looking for, great cut but not ideal standards and see what they can come up with for your budget. Most of the pricescope vendors carry diamonds in varying cut ranges. BGD, whiteflash, james allen, to name a few.

Good luck!
 
I would 100% go quality over quantity, personally. 1.11 is still large!
 
I would go for the following;

Excellent light return (Great idealscope). Don't care about patterning of percision cut hearts and arrows.
Balanced Color and Clarity (So H SI eyeclean would be a sweetspot IMO). I wouldn't go to K with your budget. H is beautiful and white and balanced.
Then largest you can find in those parameters.
 
I'd go as big & spready as possible up to H color!
 
Absolutely do NOT go down from GIA Excellent cut, but I would go to G-H SI1 in color and get the biggest stone you can. It needs to look like your first stone on the ASET, but it doesn't have to have perfect hearts. A drop in color should gain you a little size.
 
Its complicated because the price jumps if any of the characteristics in the basket get`better`.

It`s easy for you to lower the colour and increase the size and for the price to still jump up!

Well, that`s what I have found.....every time I tried to compare something that was a bit better the price went up even if some other things in the equation were down!

So it`s not an exact science for sure, and it`s easy for others to give off the cup remarks.


That being said I would go up in size where possible with your eyes being happy and your budget intact!

I would go to G or H and even SI2 where it is eye clean. I would be happy with triple excellent without the extra perfection of cut precision.

For under $10000 it sounds like you do have a very nice diamond.
 
I agree with Gypsy on every point, only I would go down to an I, happily. I am not color sensitive, so PERSONALLY I would even be happy with a J, in exchange for a larger faceup size. Only YOU know how sensitive to color your SO is and can decide accordingly.

I do prefer the patterning of the H that Gypsy posted (as opposed to the I), it looks like a gorgeous stone.

And shame on your friends for making you second-guess yourself. It sorta takes the fun out of the whole event, to slam on the brakes and change lanes at the very last minute, stressing out about getting it all straightened out on time. I'm sorry things aren't going a bit more worry-free for you. :nono:
 
And shame on your friends for making you second-guess yourself. It sorta takes the fun out of the whole event, to slam on the brakes and change lanes at the very last minute, stressing out about getting it all straightened out on time. I'm sorry things aren't going a bit more worry-free for you. :nono:
Click to expand...

Seriously!!! How dare they make this process more complicated.
 
I prefer the H too for the record. But with the 3 day wait for idealscopes at James Allen, unless he can ask them to make an exception for him, I'm not sure the timelining works for that stone.
 
Thank you all for your thoughts! It's greatly appreciated. Personally I have seen G and H diamonds and granted that they were side by side and not set I could see the difference in shade. Also the thought of it being near colorless rather than colorless doesn't sit with me well. But what do I know it's not for me I'm just basing everything on what I want her to have and that isn't very important.

So in order to accommodate all aspects I've come up with an idea. Honestly it's not one I would like but it's an option. I move forward with the ring and diamond chosen and after all goes well, i could talk it over with my SO and if she's interested we could shop for an exchange.

Is that tacky? Yea I don't like it much either but my time is so limited and I want to capture the opportunity to propose at a destination we really enjoy. Basically I'm fighting time.

Thank you everyone for your continued input.
 
Can you propose with a token ring, one that has much less financial value, and then the two of you can shop together for the 'proper' ring afterwards? Only you know what your SO is like - maybe she'd like a Ring Pop? :lol: Or more seriously, something like a nice pearl ring, or a plain band? Just a placeholder, so you can take her wants and likes into consideration, shopping together over the next few weeks. That way you get both a wonderful surprise proposal within your time frame, and the engagement ring will be "just right" for both of you. :bigsmile: I think you've got a very good mindset and love it when men put their SO's wants first when it comes to engagement rings.
 
Has she made a comment about her preference for color? My non-diamond loving friends don't know the difference as long as it's white. However, one friend of mine went down to a K, and it bugged her that it wasn't as white as everyone else's.

So I totally get your sentiment about wanting to go bigger, because it's the first thing you notice. But I think a J/K might be cutting it close, if she wanted a white white diamond.. I was able to spot the difference my very first time diamond seeing. In G/H's, I was only able to see a difference when put RIGHT NEXT TO a colorless. So I agree with all the other previous posters about the G/H/I's!
 
justginger|1337489046|3199538 said:
Can you propose with a token ring, one that has much less financial value, and then the two of you can shop together for the 'proper' ring afterwards? Only you know what your SO is like - maybe she'd like a Ring Pop? :lol: Or more seriously, something like a nice pearl ring, or a plain band? Just a placeholder, so you can take her wants and likes into consideration, shopping together over the next few weeks. That way you get both a wonderful surprise proposal within your time frame, and the engagement ring will be "just right" for both of you. :bigsmile: I think you've got a very good mindset and love it when men put their SO's wants first when it comes to engagement rings.
Click to expand...

Ring pop sounds cute LOL. However I am already committed with my jeweler. Otherwise I'd probably (although I haven't discussed with him since I was pretty confident in my selection) lose my couple hundred dollar deposit.

I am pretty certain that my SO really wants the diamond to shine bright. I got her an eternity ring with 5 point diamonds VS2 F-G color and she loves it. With this ring being much larger and visible I thought she would want something similar.
 
Honestly the E is a gorgeous stone. I think proposing with it is the right thing to do given your time restraints and your jeweler. It's really lovely and it's an E, and it's 1.1 carats so it's only a small bit smaller (in measurement) than the ones I've posted.

Just tell her that you want her to have her hearts desire (make sure your jeweler IN WRITING will take the diamond back for a full refund or exchange) and tell her that if she wants something different you won't be offended.

You are good to go, IMO.
 
The options as I see them:

Use deposit to purchase a plain ring from jeweler, thus sort of "losing" the deposit, but allowing your SO to pick out her own stone at a later time.

Speak with the jeweler and explain the situation. Most, I imagine, would be understand if you assured him you still intended to purchase with him - just in a week's time instead of now. Perhaps it even means taking this stone off hold and letting it be sold to someone else. Don't fear that situation, there are ALWAYS other diamonds that are equally as perfect...it might just take a month or two to find one.

Buy what you have picked out now and hope she loves it. :wink2: Honestly, most women are not as fussy as us PSers.

If the jeweler has a return period, or exchange policy, etc, that would be great to know about in this situation. I think it would be best to discuss with him and see how he thinks you should proceed, how much leeway he'll grant you.
 
justginger|1337491251|3199556 said:
The options as I see them:

Use deposit to purchase a plain ring from jeweler, thus sort of "losing" the deposit, but allowing your SO to pick out her own stone at a later time.

Speak with the jeweler and explain the situation. Most, I imagine, would be understand if you assured him you still intended to purchase with him - just in a week's time instead of now. Perhaps it even means taking this stone off hold and letting it be sold to someone else. Don't fear that situation, there are ALWAYS other diamonds that are equally as perfect...it might just take a month or two to find one.

Buy what you have picked out now and hope she loves it. :wink2: Honestly, most women are not as fussy as us PSers.

If the jeweler has a return period, or exchange policy, etc, that would be great to know about in this situation. I think it would be best to discuss with him and see how he thinks you should proceed, how much leeway he'll grant you.
Click to expand...

During this whole mess I have had an opportunity to ask the jeweler regarding the matter. He said we have 10 days after purchase to return/exchange. I will get it in writing when I pick it up and probably get several days on top since I wouldn't be presenting the ring for several days after pick up.
 
I think that sounds good. As Gypsy said, you've chosen a gorgeous stone. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with it, and if your friends had stayed mum, you would have never thought twice about the original plan.

My gut instinct is that she'll LOVE it and not want to give it up for anything. :bigsmile: However, that return/exchange policy in writing is an excellent safety net.

Continue with Plan A, be excited about it (!!), and let us know how it all goes.
 
birdietime|1337492107|3199560 said:
justginger|1337491251|3199556 said:
The options as I see them:

Use deposit to purchase a plain ring from jeweler, thus sort of "losing" the deposit, but allowing your SO to pick out her own stone at a later time.

Speak with the jeweler and explain the situation. Most, I imagine, would be understand if you assured him you still intended to purchase with him - just in a week's time instead of now. Perhaps it even means taking this stone off hold and letting it be sold to someone else. Don't fear that situation, there are ALWAYS other diamonds that are equally as perfect...it might just take a month or two to find one.

Buy what you have picked out now and hope she loves it. :wink2: Honestly, most women are not as fussy as us PSers.

If the jeweler has a return period, or exchange policy, etc, that would be great to know about in this situation. I think it would be best to discuss with him and see how he thinks you should proceed, how much leeway he'll grant you.
Click to expand...

During this whole mess I have had an opportunity to ask the jeweler regarding the matter. He said we have 10 days after purchase to return/exchange. I will get it in writing when I pick it up and probably get several days on top since I wouldn't be presenting the ring for several days after pick up.
Click to expand...

Tell him you have a lovely stone lined up from an online retailer who can have it to you in time. But you like supporting local businesses and would like to give the business to him because he's been very helpful. But the only thing holding you back is that the online store has a full 30 day refund and exchange and that's important to you because you want to give her time ample time to think about such a big purchase. And if he'll match that policy, IN WRITING (no questions, no stocking fee, so stipulations full refund), you will happily buy from him. Have him sign it and have it on the receipt.

That's what I'd do.
 
Gypsy|1337494089|3199576 said:
birdietime|1337492107|3199560 said:
justginger|1337491251|3199556 said:
The options as I see them:

Use deposit to purchase a plain ring from jeweler, thus sort of "losing" the deposit, but allowing your SO to pick out her own stone at a later time.

Speak with the jeweler and explain the situation. Most, I imagine, would be understand if you assured him you still intended to purchase with him - just in a week's time instead of now. Perhaps it even means taking this stone off hold and letting it be sold to someone else. Don't fear that situation, there are ALWAYS other diamonds that are equally as perfect...it might just take a month or two to find one.

Buy what you have picked out now and hope she loves it. :wink2: Honestly, most women are not as fussy as us PSers.

If the jeweler has a return period, or exchange policy, etc, that would be great to know about in this situation. I think it would be best to discuss with him and see how he thinks you should proceed, how much leeway he'll grant you.
Click to expand...

During this whole mess I have had an opportunity to ask the jeweler regarding the matter. He said we have 10 days after purchase to return/exchange. I will get it in writing when I pick it up and probably get several days on top since I wouldn't be presenting the ring for several days after pick up.
Click to expand...

Tell him you have a lovely stone lined up from an online retailer who can have it to you in time. But you like supporting local businesses and would like to give the business to him because he's been very helpful. But the only thing holding you back is that the online store has a full 30 day refund and exchange and that's important to you because you want to give her time ample time to think about such a big purchase. And if he'll match that policy, IN WRITING (no questions, no stocking fee, so stipulations full refund), you will happily buy from him. Have him sign it and have it on the receipt.

That's what I'd do.
Click to expand...


This is perfect! Good Luck! =)
 
I've been looking at pricing on some diamonds and there are no 1.3 G-H SI1 excellent cut under $8500. I haven't seen many si2 in person are there eye clean SI2 diamonds or are they few and far between. Best I'm finding is 1.2-1.25 SI1 G-H in my budget (and I can't say that they are eye clean).

Anyhow thanks everybody for all the thoughtful advice talking (posting) me through this :P . I will be proceeding with the option of being able to exchange but as justginger said I think it will be okay. I'll take the plunge hope for the best, be open about the ring and again hope for the best.

Thanks again everybody on your insight it has been most helpful and encouraging. It's greatly appreciated :D
 
The whiteness of E (compared to F, G ,H etc) is hard to resist when you are one with a preference for that icy white! I appreciate all colors myself, but I do absolutely love an extreme white look.

I sometimes think the old fashioned way of just recieving a diamond has some merits because as the reciepient of the gift you dont have to torture yourself having to choose between so many different combinations.

For me it was like being tempted by the devil himself. When I was shopping I remember that at first I was perfectly happy with a certain size and color.....then almost as if to show up how weak willed I was, I was shown another which was bigger and slightly lower color!

My innitial loyalty to the higher color sort of got thrown under a bus, for the bigger size, but it`s a decision I second guess all the time.

Your plan to choose for her and then let her choose seems to cover all bases. I bet she will love the one you chose.
 
Hi,

You'd only be going up a tiny bit in size and going down in color and possibly clarity and giving up a gorgeous icy E stone? I wouldn't do it! I bet your GF will adore the diamond you picked out.
 
YES!!!!! I agree wholeheartedly. 1.11 is NOT small - you chose a wonderful stone - stay firm to your convictions!!! Classy & Classic !! :appl:
 
I wouldn't change anything. If you are really that concerned she wants a bigger stone (and she might not) then you can suggest that there were other options that you waffled on before this stone was selected and if she wants to have input you would love her to be involved.
 
I got the ring on Tuesday!... I'm not very good at taking photos and my iPhone wouldn't take a picture any closer. Maybe I'm missing something. Anyhow without further ado...

photo%201.jpg


for some reason this one is upside down... :nono:
photo%202_0.jpg
 
Its beautiful!!! Very white and bright and a perfect size in that very classic setting - are you happy with it now that you've seen it? No more doubt or second thoughts? It is a gorgeous choice :))
 
GET 3 FREE HCA RESULTS JOIN THE FORUM. ASK FOR HELP
Jewelry Blog
PriceScope-Concierge-Ad
Find prime cuts.
Top