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School Shooting In Kentucky-January 23, 2018

I heard on MSNBC this morning that yesterday's school shooting in Kentucky (by a 15 year-old) was the first "deadly" shooting in the united states this year, but not the first shooting. (Two students died. More are in critical condition.) They said it was the eleventh shooting over all, which is also what "The New York Times" reported.

"The New York Times" believes that people have become jaded about school shootings. No one jumped into this thread to comment on it since I posted it yesterday. (And I almost didn't bother posting it.) I wonder if they could be right.

"ATLANTA — On Tuesday, it was a high school in small-town Kentucky. On Monday, a school cafeteria outside Dallas and a charter school parking lot in New Orleans. And before that, a school bus in Iowa, a college campus in Southern California, a high school in Seattle.

Gunfire ringing out in American schools used to be rare, and shocking. Now it seems to happen all the time.

The scene in Benton, Ky., on Tuesday was the worst so far in 2018: Two 15-year-old students were killed and 18 more people were injured. But it was one of at least 11 shootings on school property recorded since Jan. 1, and roughly the 50th of the academic year.

Researchers and gun control advocates say that since 2013, they have logged school shootings at a rate of about one a week."

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/01/23/...&WT.nav=top-news&login=email&auth=login-email
 
Awful. Unfortunately, I think people here are desensitized to these shootings and hence the lack of replies Deb.
So tragic.:cry2: When will common sense rule about gun control and something be done to really prevent these shootings. How many more innocent people have to die and suffer?
 
All we will hear is more thoughts and prayers and things like mentally ill teens, mentally ill lone wolves and terrorists, not guns are the problem. I for one am over that bulls@#* - thoughts and prayers don't bring innocent dead kids or people back to life, a failure to implement successful gun control laws and way too much gun access by people who should never be able to get guns in the first place are just tips of the Iceberg. Gun control, Trump, this backlash in the US against equality, and a move to far right conservatism - it's like a step back in time to an era where the US lost it's ability to apply common sense and any shred of critical thinking.
 
:appl:@arkieb1
 
Gun control, America.
Gun control.
 
Desensitized.

It’s happened.

I think the children are becoming more afraid though. My twelve year old has been mentioning shootings more. He’s talked to me about the Columbine shooters, their motives, their parents, the act... He’s also said that he’s afraid of shootings. One day, I could hardly get him to school.


Soooo.....how do I tell him he’s safe, when I don’t fully believe that he is? How do I tell him he’s safe when he’s doing active shooter drills? That is a type of thinking that I can’t encourage. It seems like sheer stupidity. I want my son to be logical. I want him to trust his instincts.

This shooting didn’t make me more afraid or more outraged and i feel like a piece of garbage because of that. I feel sorry for the families and the children who lived through it. I just don’t have the huge amounts of energy to put into these events anymore. It’s wasted. I have to direct it where it counts..on my child.
 
House Cat said:
... Soooo.....how do I tell him he’s safe, when I don’t fully believe that he is? .
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Pick 1 or 2:

1. You lie.
You just lie.

2. Tell him the truth, that safety is not a black and white thing ... safety is about odds and degrees.
Explain there is no such thing as 100% safe, only safer and less-safe.
Then segue into how drills make him safer.

The latter is how I'd raise my child.
Why teach certainty about what is not certain?

Is it wrong to be honest with small children?
Odds and degrees are just what is true when it comes to safety.
People tell little ones about their favorite Gods, yet there is no proof that Gods are real.
 
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I have a 9 year old and I would probably lie and tell him that he was safe too, it's our responsibility as adults to solve things like better gun control, and to keep our children safe, and to make them feel safe. Kids grow up way too fast as it is, so why make them more fearful, it's not their jobs yet to solve these issues. If something like that did really occur at their schools, or a shopping centre or a sporting or other event then the best you can do is make sure they know any drills and if a mass shooter or someone hellbent on killing people does come into contact with us, there is probably very little any of us could do anyway.
 
Yup. Thoughts and prayers!
Guns don't kill people, people kill people!

It's twofold for me. One, I definitely feel desensitized. My first reaction to the Benton, KY shooting was "at least only 2 died this time." What a terrible thought. But there it is. Two, I feel like it is pointless to talk about it here. Same arguments from the same people. It makes me feel hopeless when I see nothing being done, just the same old tug-of-war between two schools of thought. We are at war with each other, and our children are a reflection of our actions and inactions.
 
Imagine if you told your kid's they're safe, but the next school shooting is at their school?

Can you say, loss of trust?
Will they then they believe anything you say?

I'll never understand why honesty is the best policy is wrong for little ones.
 
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kenny said:
Imagine if you told your kid's they're safe, but the next school shooting is at their school?

I'll never understand why honesty is the best policy is wrong for little ones.
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Because as a former teacher honesty has to be age appropriate sometimes the ugly world truth can create anxiety and issues for some (not all but some) children and I'm not talking about making them special snowflakes I'm talking about various ages not having the brain development and or social and emotional skill level to always process the full adult version of full truth.
 
I don't think people are desensitized much as they are demoralized. And tired. Just like thoughts and prayers do exactly zip to change the situation, being constantly outraged and posting about it on a diamond site doesn't do anything either, except make the outraged person feel like crap. As monarch so eloquently and correctly put it, we are at war with each other. There is a cold(ish) civil war going on in America's collective mind. Is it any wonder that the violence in our heads erupts into real violence periodically?
 
To feel safe and protected is a basic need of childhood. How to approach this with children depends on the child's age. 4 or younger I wouldn't bring it up or have the news on if they are around. If they ask I would answer any of their questions of course but be reassuring and calm. That you will do everything in your power to keep him/her safe and if you thought it was dangerous you wouldn't let him/her go to school.

For the older kids I would answer their questions honestly (not a fan of lying to anyone and kids are smart and will figure out they are being lied to eventually and ultimately learn to not trust you) but I would be as reassuring as possible. It is important for kids to feel safe and if they don't they will become anxious and fearful adults.

I would acknowledge that yes bad things do happen in this world but reassure them that everything possible is being done to keep them safe. That the teachers and police and the parents are all working together to make the schools, home and neighborhood as safe as possible. As adults it is important to help them put the fear in proportion to the real risk.

And of course as parents you know when your child is struggling and showing signs that they might need professional help.
It's a scary world but it really has always been a scary world. It's just different kind of scary.

Maybe if the kids of today grow up smarter than we did gun control in the USA will become real making us all a lot safer. Just maybe if we give them the building blocks of common sense that they need we will see real change in the coming decades.
 
In response to the shooting, my son’s school had an active shooter drill yesterday. My son told me that he doesn’t like where they have the kids stand in the classroom. They have all of the children stand up against the lockers and in that instance “a shooter could spray bullets through the window and kill us all.” He wants to submit a question to the principal, asking about their positioning in the classroom.

Does anyone else see that there is something inherently wrong with the fact that my twelve year old needs to ponder such issues?

When I align these events into my value system, I believe my child is not overly fearful. He is just the right amount of fearful. These drills, the positioning in front of the window, the fact that he is twelve, none of this should be happening...if he is afraid, that seems about right.

Of course I am as reassuring as possible. Of course I don’t speak my mind on this issue. But I am trying to tell all of you that this issue actually runs a lot deeper than what you see on the news. It runs deeper than your sarcastic “thoughts and prayers” comments. Because now, we are indoctrinating our children to accept a bloody fate. We’re attempting to desensitize them, rather than doing the right thing. This issue is far sicker than I realized.

Truth be known, as a parent, I feel like I am a hostage to this whole thing. If I don’t go along with this desensitization project, my child will be fearful. If I do go along with it, he won’t be as afraid but he won’t be the type of adult to incite change on an issue that i hate so much.
 
House Cat said:
In response to the shooting, my son’s school had an active shooter drill yesterday. My son told me that he doesn’t like where they have the kids stand in the classroom. They have all of the children stand up against the lockers and in that instance “a shooter could spray bullets through the window and kill us all.” He wants to submit a question to the principal, asking about their positioning in the classroom.

Does anyone else see that there is something inherently wrong with the fact that my twelve year old needs to ponder such issues?

When I align these events into my value system, I believe my child is not overly fearful. He is just the right amount of fearful. These drills, the positioning in front of the window, the fact that he is twelve, none of this should be happening...if he is afraid, that seems about right.

Of course I am as reassuring as possible. Of course I don’t speak my mind on this issue. But I am trying to tell all of you that this issue actually runs a lot deeper than what you see on the news. It runs deeper than your sarcastic “thoughts and prayers” comments. Because now, we are indoctrinating our children to accept a bloody fate. We’re attempting to desensitize them, rather than doing the right thing. This issue is far sicker than I realized.

Truth be known, as a parent, I feel like I am a hostage to this whole thing. If I don’t go along with this desensitization project, my child will be fearful. If I do go along with it, he won’t be as afraid but he won’t be the type of adult to incite change on an issue that i hate so much.
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House Cat, your kid is smart and perceptive and that is why he is fearful. He is old enough to realize there are no guarantees in life and not everybody has a happy ending or even a happy life. You are doing everything you can to help him but the reality is life can be scary and unsafe. If this were me and my kid I think I would seek out professional help. A therapist who is an expert is child counseling especially one who deals with these issues. I am sorry for all the kids going through scary uncertain times and it is a hard and bitter lesson about life one has to learn at such an early age.
(((Hugs))).
 
My very best friend (from pharmacy school) just moved back to Paducah last year when she had her baby... The last school shooting to affect that area was when she was a senior in high school, so there is a lot of PTSD for this community in addition to the heartache.

She works with the mother of the girl who was killed at the scene. Please keep these families in your thoughts and prayers.
 
msop04 said:
My very best friend (from pharmacy school) just moved back to Paducah last year when she had her baby... The last school shooting to affect that area was when she was a senior in high school, so there is a lot of PTSD for this community in addition to the heartache.

She works with the mother of the girl who was killed at the scene. Please keep these families in your thoughts and prayers.
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I am so sorry to hear this, msop. Real people are harmed by each of these terrible acts. I will certainly pray for your friend and her family. I wish we could also do more legislatively.

Hugs,
Deb
 
House Cat said:
Truth be known, as a parent, I feel like I am a hostage to this whole thing. If I don’t go along with this desensitization project, my child will be fearful. If I do go along with it, he won’t be as afraid but he won’t be the type of adult to incite change on an issue that i hate so much.
Click to expand...

Yes unfortunately you are a hostage because you live in a country that allows small wealthy narrow minded organisations like the NRA to control votes and overall legislation for all Americans regardless of whether or not all Americans want guns in their lives. The US isn't a third world country I'm appalled that your son even has to go through that.
 
arkieb1 said:
Yes unfortunately you are a hostage because you live in a country that allows small wealthy narrow minded organisations like the NRA to control votes and overall legislation for all Americans regardless of whether or not all Americans want guns in their lives. The US isn't a third world country I'm appalled that your son even has to go through that.
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Don't get discouraged: we're definitely working on it. Some areas are well on their way, trust me. In my state's case, it's less third world, than feudal, but still, hurtling back at a clip? You bet.

:rolleyes:
 
AGBF said:
I am so sorry to hear this, msop. Real people are harmed by each of these terrible acts. I will certainly pray for your friend and her family. I wish we could also do more legislatively.

Hugs,
Deb
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Thank you, Deb...
 
msop04 said:
My very best friend (from pharmacy school) just moved back to Paducah last year when she had her baby... The last school shooting to affect that area was when she was a senior in high school, so there is a lot of PTSD for this community in addition to the heartache.

She works with the mother of the girl who was killed at the scene. Please keep these families in your thoughts and prayers.
Click to expand...

Ugh, I lived there for a very brief time when I was 19. I remember when the shooting happened and how hard it rocked the community. I believe it was the second mass school shooting, after Columbine. It was 20 years ago, and nothing has changed. Things have become progressively worse, it seems. My heart goes out to your friend and all the families whose lives will forever be affected.
 
arkieb1 said:
Because as a former teacher honesty has to be age appropriate sometimes the ugly world truth can create anxiety and issues for some (not all but some) children and I'm not talking about making them special snowflakes I'm talking about various ages not having the brain development and or social and emotional skill level to always process the full adult version of full truth.
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Thank you.
... and thank goodness we'll never have an opps-baby. ;)2

I know I'm not suitable parent material.
 
Makes me want to home school both my kids. I can't even think about it.
 
Our country continues to allow this to happen. Denying we have a huge problem with guns sure hasn’t made this problem go away. 20 years ago school shootings were considered horrific. Now it’s a just a regular news story. SAD
 
More than stupidly easy access to guns, what we really have is a problem with white males and an even larger one with masculinity in general. Think Kimmel's term "aggrieved entitlement". And it's not getting better in our current environment of semi-hysterical nostalgia amongst those in the power structure for When (White) Men Ruled The Earth.

Why Are So Many Mass Shootings Committed by Young White Men?
https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/...ss-shootings-committed-by-young-white-men-623
 
Not just white men. They are loners. Obsessive. Sit at their computer games, hating the world and themselves. Have profuse imaginary world. When it becomes incredibly large and spills over the real world, they start shooting.
 
Am I the only one who thinks that gun control will be another Prohibition, and instead, it makes sense to divide the gun market between two lobbies by mandating the owners buy gun insurances? Insurance companies have the way of figuring out whom to sell insurances, and whom not to.
 
Calliecake said:
Our country continues to allow this to happen. Denying we have a huge problem with guns sure hasn’t made this problem go away. 20 years ago school shootings were considered horrific. Now it’s a just a regular news story. SAD
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We have the same pattern, the same type, the same face, it seems.

A huge mistake was made when the conclusions of the commission working in the Columbine were never published. I think the commission working in Littlejohn, CO, was trying to protect a huge group from being stigmatized by association, but as the result, we are continuously reading about the same profiles of the shooters. And many of them are copycat shooters.
 
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