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Ring Taboo?

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Clandestine

Rough_Rock
Joined
Apr 3, 2007
Messages
2
Didn''t know where it put this so I figured I''d post it here! I have a promise ring from a previous boyfriend that I got to wear for probably three months before we broke up. The ring is a decent size, and exactly what I''ve always wanted, I take it out and look at it a few times a week still. Keep in mind that I also paid for half of this ring. Now that I''m with my new boyfriend and we''re talking about getting married would it be horrible to want to reuse this ring? Normally I wouldn''t even consider it, but I''ve never found anything like it, or that I liked more. What I really dread is trying to explain to my family why I''m wearing it again. It''s a 1/3c white gold tention ring, very low setting and perfect for me. I just wish I had found it at a different time! Any advice would be great!
 

Hudson_Hawk

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 2, 2006
Messages
10,541
Hmmm...I personally would not be able to wear it again in it''s current form. I understand you paid for 1/2 but still, it was a gift from a previous love. I think my current bf and DEFINITELY my family would have a problem with me wearing it as well. What about resetting the stone into a necklace. Maybe you can find some sort of tension set pendant for it instead. Or, see about a trade-up policy at the store and trade it in to help finance a bigger/better ring for your new engagement.
 

MiniMouse

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 30, 2004
Messages
1,015
Clandestine, keep the ring as is since you like it so much, I'm sure in years to come you can wear it as a right hand ring.

My advice is start anew with a new ring from your boyfriend. If you really like the same style why not get a company like Whiteflash to reproduce a new one in a similar style? That way I'm sure you'd both be happy. However, I'd strongly advise you go shopping and try on as many styles as you can find, it's suprising what other styles you will fall in love with when you try them on. It's also very exciting to do so.
 

neatfreak

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 17, 2007
Messages
14,167
I might reuse the stone if it doesn''t have a bad vibe to it for you, but never the whole ring. Just me, but that''s a little too weird even for my practical side.
 

NYCsparkle

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 23, 2006
Messages
1,371
start fresh...does your bf know about this ring? he might be upset at the thought of using it. you will find some other ring design you like as much if not better... i do all the time
. stick around here and it''ll happen.
 

winternight

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2006
Messages
887
I would start fresh, you don''t want your new fiance looking at your finger thinking of your ex. Actually I''m in the process of selling some old jewelry because I don''t like to be reminded of my ex and I picked out the jewelry, so you know I love it!
 

Cehrabehra

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jun 29, 2006
Messages
11,071
I think you need to talk to your boyfriend about this - it really can only be a decision the two of you make. I have a friend who wears (happily and proudly I might add) the wedding set from her husband''s mom''s first marriage to his father (that failed) that he later proposed to someone *else* with, who accepted and wore it and they later broke it off... God only knows why the man thinks this set is so special (it''s a 1960''s solderd 1/4-1/3 carat forgettable to be blunt) but because HE thinks it is special, SHE thinks it is the greatest thing on the planet and would never dream of trading in or up despite the fact she admits it is not something she would have chosen.

If you like it and your boyfriend likes it then that''s all that matters. "Taboos" only have as much power as you give them.
 

FireGoddess

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 25, 2005
Messages
12,145
I would wear it as a RHR but I would not use it as an ering if it were me.
 

Tacori E-ring

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 15, 2005
Messages
20,036
I agree that you need to talk to your BF about this. I know my DH would not have been comfortable with it. I would not get rid of the ring and also agree it would make a great RHR but I think your new engagement should start out with a new ring.
 

Clandestine

Rough_Rock
Joined
Apr 3, 2007
Messages
2
Thank you for the great advice ladies! Now I realize how insane I must have sounded. I''m going to see about having it turned into necklace or perhaps have a few other rings dismantled and turned into a right hand ring along with it. Thank you again!
 

fabcrab

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Sep 2, 2006
Messages
507
Well, you might want to reset the old promise ring into a pendant. I personally wouldn''t want to re-use a ring from a failed relationship.
 

kcoursolle

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 21, 2006
Messages
10,589
How does your current bf feel about the issue? Have you talked about it at all? If he''s cool with it, and there''s little chance of ever seeing your ex...then why not? My dad wears the same wedding band from his previous marriage before my mom. My mom offered to buy him a new one when they got married, but he said "This one fits well and I like it, why should I get a new one?" Some would think it''s a little weird, but if you are fine with it and so is your current bf then who cares.
 
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