PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

[fieryred33143]

Mandy-the boys are too cute!!

Vesper-so are your boys!

Re cuddly babies: Sophia isn''t one necessarily but she is a momma''s girl. I get lots of kisses from her on demand and when she''s crying, I get hugs.

Jcrow-I think it was Dreamer that was (maybe still is?) EBFing and she went straight to sippy if I''m remembering correctly. I think it was around 9 months, she had a thread on it. Anyway, if you won''t need to pump for every feeding then I would either not have a pump, get a handheld manual pump or a handheld single-electric pump. I''ve heard awesome things about the Medela Swing but it''s $149 and I''m sure you can get something less expensive for what you want to do. I personally think it''s a good idea to have a pump at hand for times when you need to be away (dinners, movies, alone time, etc.)

 

[blushingbride]

OMG Mandarine and Vesper - too cute for words!!!!

 

[Sha]

Hope everybody had a great Mother''s Day!

PG - yes, the babies and toddlers are together, I guess because it''s a small, home-run daycare. Most other private/governent centers have nurseries for the babies and separate areas for the bigger ones.

viz - ugh, ugh, and ugh....

I hope things get better for you and C soon.

Amber - yayy for getting some sexy time!

fiery - I''m glad you spoke to the therapist and have a way forward, at least. (( HUGS)) I hope things start looking up soon.

Love all the new pics!

 

[mtjoya]

I hate to be a debbie downer, but I am so pissed right now! My DH and I haven''t spoken to each other since Mother''s Day. We got into a huge argument because we came back from his parent''s house and had me carry all of our stuff back without helping me. He was being bossy and I got so frustrated that I went off on him not helping blah blah. I don''t really like to tell anyone IRL because I am a very private person and don''t want my personal business out there. I am so upset. I told him that this was the 1st WORST mother''s day ever. He never told me I am sorry nothing. He heard me crying and never hugged me or anything. He told me that I should go back to the doctor to get some pills cuz I am acting crazy. I called him an ass. I tell my mom and she said that it''s both our faults and to sit down to talk, but when we talk, somehow it always turns into being my fault. I am upset because I feel like he never puts any effort into helping. I am always lugging crap around, running like a mad woman. While big boss is over there chilling and asking he needs this and that. What is funny is that when we go over to his parents house he acts like super dad. He is so helpful. He caters to me but when we get home, he runs to his computer and does his thing. So annoying. I just don''t wanna talk to him. I was so pissed at him that I even told him that he should go to his parent''s house to stay there! Aw, girls sorry I just had to vent.

 

[vespergirl]

Fiery, your post caught my eye, and I just wanted to say that I know exactly what you''re going through. I had PPD with my older son, and going on Wellbutrin after he stopped BFing made a HUGE difference in my life. I also went to talk therapy for a couple of months. I just wanted to send you hugs, and let you know that there is help out there that works, so definitely talk to your dr. and figure out how to move forward - you will be fine. Sending hugs!

Mandarine, seriously? Those babies are ridonkulous! Not only gorgeous baby fat rolls, but on identical twins? That picture is adorable.

Viszla, I hope you''re feeling better!

MTjoya, I''m so sorry to hear about your issues with your DH. I know that you guys will work everything out, but it does feel good to vent to us here on PS. Still, though, it bites that he ruined your Mother''s Day.

Everyone else, I''m so sorry that I have no idea what''s going on with you - honestly, I''ve been really busy trying not to lose my mind, but I''m trying to check in to PS because it relaxes me, and I''m dying to find out what''s happening with everyone!

But, my 3 year old (who was previously totally potty trained) is now totally regressing, pooing his pants, and asking to wear the size 1 baby diapers, so I''ve really been trying to hold it together over here, but I''m losing my patience, and fast. Baby Connor is great, except for the fact that he projectile vomits several times a day - Andrew has only spit up twice in his entire life, so this has been a surprise, and the amount of laundry has been overwhelming :p

Honestly, though, the hands down most chaotic part of it is that my mom is staying here (and will be for the next two weeks) and is making me nutty. She is kind of pushy with the constant parenting advice (1970s style - feed him more when he has reflux, put him to sleep on his stomach, all those crazy old gems), and swoops in to pick up the baby every time he makes a peep, like I''m not getting there fast enough to take care of him. I know that I''m just being touchy, but she''s been really getting on my nerves. I''m just looking forward to getting my house back to myself ...

I guess I came on here to vent too - hope that everyone is doing well! BTW, I loved everyone''s baby pics this week!

 

[ChinaCat]

Fiery- Hugs aren''t even enough. You are such a lovely person and a super fantastic mom, I hate that you are going through this. Depression and anxiety are such dark places to be. I am still super proud of you for going to the therapist, and for following her advice, AND admitting all of this to us. That tells me you are committed to getting through this, no matter how hard it is. Please know we are here for you for anything, even just to be sad. I get so much out of your posts and friendship here. Just want you to know how much you are loved and appreciated. Now go put those sweatpants on and watch Lost tonight.

We can discuss tomorrow!

Mtjoya- Sorry about the DH. Men sometimes just don''t get it. I will say I think it is way more normal than not to go through this with a newborn. You are exhausted, feel underappreciated and are quick to be angry and have your feelings hurt. The men are bewildered and don''t know what to do, and often just go about their business like nothing has changed, whereas EVERYTHING in your life has changed. It''s HARD. But try to remember that you guys love each other and you will get through this. You''ve got to step up and start telling him what you need. It''s hard to do, but you''ll lose your mind if you don''t. It will get better, I promise!!! But please know, as great as my DH is, I wanted to throw him out of the window at times.

I think I remember our conversations going like this at times:
DH: You''re being mean to me.
Me: Well stop doing s**t to MAKE me be mean to you!

Vesper- Hang in there. I am sure it is that much harder to do the newborn thing with a kid already around that needs you. How old is Connor now? Remember it gets better every day. I read somewhere that older kids tend to act up, but after 4 months they go back to how they were before. Obviously you don''t want Andrew regressing for 4 months, but I bet he''ll get over this phase soon.

Lysser- Oh, how fun would a lunch date be? Or any sort of date! Laughing over here at the thought of TWO screaming monkeys!!!!!

Ebree and Sabine- Thanks for commenting. Good to know it''s more "normal" than flat-out brat.

Tell me when they get past it!

Mandarine- Full stop my heart. TWO chunkey monkeys, you''re killing me. That is an awesome picture, I just love their little grown-up expressions!

 

[phoenixgirl]

jcrow, that's a tough one. I think I probably would get a pump, just not one with fancy extras like a carry bag, and definitely not a super expensive one like the Medela Pump In Style, but something under $200. My thinking is, what if you were out for an errand and got stuck in traffic, or got the stomach bug and couldn't get up to feed her, or had too many margaritas and needed to "pump and dump"? I'd want to have a freezer stash just for peace of mind. I'd go crazy never being able to be away from Claire for more than 2 or 3 hours until she's weaned. Not that I'm away from her that much outside of work, but the ability to do things on your own is important.

Fiery, thinking about you! I give you props for still being so present and supportive here, even when you're having a difficult time. Be sure to take care of you!

Tao, hmmm, yeah, noon seems late. I would say don't worry, but don't ignore your intuition either. If it continues much more, I'd check again with the pedi.

Speaking of the pedi, I tempted fate by saying Claire had only been sick once . . . it looks like she has viral pink eye in one eye. Drat you annoying law of the universe! But stupid me for forgetting your power!

Sha, I gotcha. I hope there hasn't been any more biting!

mtjoya, so sorry. I hope the venting has helped -- it always helps me. This parenting thing is hard. All I can offer is that you've got to say what you need and compromise to make sure you're both being heard and accommodated.

vesper, what a sweetheart! So sorry to hear about the potty-training regression, projectile vomiting, and overly "helpful" mom. I've had such a hard time adjusting to having one baby; I can't imagine having two children, but I suppose you adjust just like you do for the first one.


Mother's Day, etc. Mine was good, and DH and I are good at communicating about things, but I feel like every week I have to say that I feel like he's doing too much outside of the house. And I guess if he can't adjust his exuberance for activity, this is just how it will have to be. He's receptive (usually) to my requests, but every so often I blow up about it, as I did Sunday night. The background is that my birthday was last month, and we "cashed in" our Christmas present from DH's dad to see a play and go out to dinner. So it wasn't like it was a present DH got me -- it was just a late Christmas present. We decided not to go out to our dinner that weekend, or the next, because we were busy, but I mentioned several times wanting to have a party or dinner with friends. DH mentioned how he would get me a cookie cake for this occasion, so I assumed this occasion would be planned/executed.

Well, no, DH plans nothing, I get upset, he whips up a dinner out with friends with two days' notice, only three couples come (one of which he had to bribe), but I appreciate the effort. His presents to me for my BD were all books he got the day before my birthday (i.e. last minute). His big present was a trip to France which, well, we'd already decided to take for our anniversary. And I'll have to plan it. But still, I took it in stride. He really tried with the last minute dinner. The trip will be nice. Etc.

But then he spent all this time planning this cookout last weekend for his bike team. Weeks of planning, invites, shopping for food, etc. For mother's day, he got me thoughtful gifts, but neither of them arrived in time (or yet), so I just got the promise of them. Still, I was fine. But then Sunday night he mentioned, for the first time that I can remember, that this Friday this guy I don't know whom my DH met once at a bike show will be spending the night with us. When he first mentioned how he met this cool guy and invited him to come visit us, I was like, yeah, that's weird, I don't think so. That's the last I remember about it! So finally I was annoyed. Thanks for giving me a Christmas present and an anniversary gift for my birthday. Thanks for putting way more thought into your cookout than to my birthday dinner. Thanks for leaving me with Claire all Saturday morning while you were at a bike race, then announcing at your cookout that you'd be riding Sunday morning too, on Mother's Day, leaving me alone for hours again. (I put the kibosh on that, right then, I'm not wilting flower, but I did say it was ok to ride in the afternoon after I had been sure to get in a run and a mother's day lunch). Thanks for inviting your mystery BFF to stay with us without asking me, or at least reminding me.

So Sunday I realized that DH had plans from Tuesday through Sunday nights of this week. Jumping jeepers, man, I don't think anyone thinks this is normal! But he does respond when I complain. He cancelled a bunch of the things. We've still got mystery guest coming. He says that he always makes it happen when I want to do something. I guess I need to be more proactive in "claiming" nights to do things for myself -- exercise, girls' night, etc. The problem is that I scale back on what I'm doing to preserve family time and don't ask or tell him I'm missing out, and he agrees to these things without consulting me.

So we're a work in progress.

 

[KimberlyH]

jcrow, I have an Ameda Purely Yours and really like it. I also have a Medela hand pump which I found extrodinarily frustrating, which is why I bought the electric pump. It''s a bit much for my needs, but very convenient.

Fiery, you are a great mom, and part of that is that you are taking care of yourself, which means you can take better care of Sophia. I can be a bit high strung and have had some anxiety revolving around Jane, it''s tough. Hang in there.

mtjoya, sorry about your frustrrations with your husband.

Ginger, hope you''re doing okay.

Pandora, your vacation sounded wonderful!

Mandarine, that picture is darlngi!

Vesper, hang in there.

Vizsla, hope the ENT appt. resolves some of what is gonig on.

Cuddling: Little Miss wants nothing but to be held. She''ll hang out in her vibrating chair or on a blanket for a bit, but then she''s ready to be picked up again. She will ride in her stroller when J takes her out alone, but with me she fusses/screams until I pick her up, so we''re using the sling a lot.


****

We''re doing great. Jane is getting more and more wonderful every day. She isn''t a fan of tummy time and I don''t do enough of it as a result. She''s growing and eating, and eating, and eating, and interacting and she just fills me with so much joy every day.

Still no real sleep schedule to speak of. I get one good chunk at the beginning of the night and then we''re all over the place; she takes one long nap during the day, and then catnaps here and there. I assume that this is, in part, due to breast feeding. I''m going to push her bedtime forward more, starting tonight, and see what that does. I''d be a mess if I had to go back to work f/t, but knowing I get to take a nap makes it totally doable.

A friend came to visit for several days, which didn''t help with the small semblance of a schedule I had going. We took our first trip to the zoo. Jane slept most of the time. I was a bit paranoid about being out with her for so long, it went really well though.

I start back to work next week. It is a pefect job/schedule, but I''m still dreading it a bit.

Mother''s Day was truly wonderful. I''ve been admiring a local artist''s work for several years and my gift was that I go to pick one of his works. We met with him yesterday and my new piece of art is now hanging above the mantel. I absolutely love it. It''s the first thing I''ve done to decorate our new house.

 

[Mara]

kim... J doesn't like tummy time either but we do it anyway...i figure not everything has to be what he loves...that's life kiddo! plus he needs to get up his arm strength.

fiery... hugs and i hope that the cognitive combo'd with the med works for you. it's hard to be patient.

viz... funny you say that about the work/home mentally flip flopping sabotage thing, i am returning to work soon and i totally feel like that is how i will be, sometimes i just wish they'd give me a package since we are in the middle of this reorg and then other times i want to go and prove myself all over again. anyway.

jcrow... i have the ameda purely yours. i got it on diapers.com without the extras/bag and their 10% for like $100 with free ship. it's great, it's electric double and it's closed system so it's supposed to be more sanitary. like the others have said i'd def want a pump for times when the kid is not draining you and/or you want to build a stash to be away for any reason.

i went with a gf today to some mommy group thing at her hospital where anyone is allowed to come. we weighed J and he's 14lbs!! my little chunk. and they have LC's there so you can ask Q's etc. it was great fun and J loved being out and around the other babies.

and sometimes it takes me being around other babies to realize that J is actually a pretty easy baby. my friend has to rock her baby to sleep for naps all the time, in fact she had to do this while we were at this group. i put J in his car seat, gave him the paci and jiggled the car seat with my foot til he passed out. she said she still has to rock him to sleep most of the time.

interesting cuz the LC we talked to said i should only be pumping for 15-20 min max. she said 30-40 min is too long. i said well what if the pump is not draining my milk in 15-20 min? she didn't really have an answer other than 'try it again 10-15 min later'...but what if the milk is flowing at min20? seems silly to stop it. anyway who knows. but i can take me a good 5-10 min to get a let down on the pump sometimes.

and the last 3 days J is suddenly rejecting one of the boobs during his one feed he still has directly on them. it's usually whatever boob he gets second but i know he is still hungry because then he pounds a bottle. ugh...so it might be all pumping for me soon.

oh and in case this helps anyone, she said that breast milk in a bottle is good up to 6 hours even if the kid has eaten from the bottle. she said BM has bacteria fighting properties. and i asked about what if formula is mixed in there and she said within 2-3 hours is what she'd estimate though formula companies say one hour max once they've fed. i was also thinking if it's a MIX of bm and formula that the bacteria fighting props from the BM prob work on the formula too. anyway.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Mandarine, omg! The CUTE! I just want to nom nom nom on their legs, they are so adorable. And I love those pointy eyebrows they have going on hehe.

ETA: Cuddling - Micah is SUCH a cuddle bug, unless he's really mad and wants a diaper change/bottle. Otherwise he wants me to snuggle him into my chest literally all the time. He is happiest when I have him wrapped him and in my arms. And in the crook of my elbow does NOT work - it has to be my chest lol. He loves kisses, too, he starts smiling if I kiss his belly and makes the "O" face when I kiss him anywhere else. I love that he's cuddly, my mom and dad really weren't affectionate that way with me as a kid so I crave body contact now.

 

[qtiekiki]

vesper
How cute your little men are in matching outfit.
Sorry Andrew regressed, but it''s really common when a new baby is around.
Hopefully your mom doesn''t drive you too bunker. They mean well, but sometimes it''s hard to deal with.

Jcrow
I wouldn''t worry about your DD (sorry I forgot her name) not taking the boobs after bottle feeding. I don''t think anyone on here had issues going back and forth between breasts and bottles. From my personal experience of BFing M and now J, they much prefer the boobs to bottles. If I am around, they make a big fuss on the bottle.
I would still get a pump in your situation. It''s nice to have option; you might need it for date nights or whatever.
If you don''t pump, then you don''t need bottles. And I would go straight to sippy when your DD is older. One less transitions to go through. M started using sippy at around 8.5 months.

Cuddly babies
M was not cuddly at all, not until she was past 1 year old. So I hope J is more cuddly sooner.

Mtjoya
Sorry about your Mother''s Day. Hope you''ll get to work it out soon.

Kim
Don''t worry too much about tummy time. She''ll eventually likes it. In the meantime, you can try tummy time on your chest or your leg. You can also put her on an exercise ball, and roll her back-and-forth and side-to-side. Or even carry her around on her tummy.
Good luck with going back to work next week. I go back on the 24th, and I am dreading it, even though it''s the second time around and I know it''ll be fine once I go back.

Mara
Good to know that BM is good for 6 hours after the baby drinks from it. I''ve always read 1 hour.
If milk was still flowing after 20 mins of pumping, then I would just keep pumping until it stops. Don''t know if that''s the correct answer, but it just makes sense to me. I usually pump for 15 mins, but sometimes I get a second let down at the 15 mins mark.

 

[natalina]

Okay, so I have been a bad, bad PS''er lately! We sold our house (yay!), went on a frantic search for a new one in a different city (suburbs of Chicago), and have been organizing/packing like crazy. Moving truck comes this Saturday- eek! I haven''t even really been lurking

. I have kpt up with FB a bit, so I''ve seen some of the new pics, but I miss you guys! But I decided to lurk tonight after Ellie went to bed and had to jump in about a couple things:

Fiery- I have always loved reading your posts about Sophia because of the love that just radiates from your words. It has always been clear that your sun rises and sets with your little girl, and you have such a beautiful bond with her. I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling right now, and my heart goes out to you. I''m so glad that you are getting help, and I hope that you will use us as a shoulder to lean on, ear to vent to, and anything else you need. ((((Hugs))))

Mandarine- seriously, they could not BE any cuter!! They are just yummy!

Viz- I hope the ENT can get Charlie''s situation taken care of! Poor little guy, and poor little mama taking care of him! You BOTH deserve to get some good sleep!

MP- Micah is so cute!!!!!!!! Congrats! (Sorry I am so late)

Vesper- Connor is a cutie, too! Congrats!

JCrow- I have the Ameda Purely Yours, and used it when Ellie was about 4-6 weeks old because I was raw from learning how to BF. Since I got back "up and running" I haven''t even taken it out of the box. While it was a lifesaver then, it feels like a big waste of money now. I''m a SAHM, so I just nurse Ellie as needed- no pumping. Granted, that means being available to her about every 3 hours, but that''s okay with me. I am rarely away from her anyway.

Sorry for everyone I am missing! I feel so terrible that I am so far behind. Quick update on things here: Ellie is a great sleeper now. At about 6 months I decided to use the HSHHC book as a guide. Whether it was that or just her age, I don''t know- but it''s like someone flipped a switch! I really do think getting her on a strict nap schedule made a huge difference. And yes, we are tied to it- no going out around nap times, etc, but it is so worth it! We also bumped her bedtime (was 8pm) up to 7-7:15pm. She will then sleep until about 5am, then I feed her and she goes back down until about 7-7:30am. I am really worried that it might all fall apart with the move coming up next week because we will be spending about a week in limbo staying with family, etc. She has tried everything in the first foods line, and is working her way through the seconds. Has had pretty much all of those except strawberries and raspberries. Also pretty much anything we eat that can be mashed really fine. I really want to try finger foods, but I am so scared she will choke! Any recs on that? Do any of the other 6-7 month babies have teeth yet? I don''t even see a sign that they are coming!
Also- thinking about getting her a big girl car seat

. Any recommendations? Looking into the Safety First Complete Air or a few different Britax models. Too many choices!!! I wish someone would just say "this one is best"! It''s not that $ is not a concern, but this is the kind of purchase that we are willing to splurge on if it means she will be safer, you know? Anyhoo, would love advice...

And a recent pic...

 

[Mandarine]

VesperAdorable!!!!!!!!!!

Love their outfits too!!!

Natalina Yay for selling the house!!!!!

You''ve been missed!. Ellie is so adorable!!!!!. My boys are also sleeping great at night...and naps are still a little bit all over the place. Do you mind sharing your schedule?.

Re: Cars eats...I was also very confused!. I ended up going with the Britax Marathon and got a great deal on it through diapers.com ($199+free shipping). Honestly I think if you stick with a good reputation brand you''re probably fine. I have heard great things about Safety 1st, sunshine kids (or something like that!) and Britax.

Mara I was laughing with the "not everything has to be what he loves" comment....hehe. Just too funny!

Kim Nice to see you!!!!. Did I tell you I love Jane''s name?. Love it!. My guys HATED tummy time...so honestly for a while I didn''t do it much....but I would try to at least make them do it for one minute. The one position mine seemed to hate the least was tummy time using the boppy pillows on the couch (either looking outside or looking at each other! hehe). But tummy time on the floor was like I was torturing them!. So maybe try that and see how it goes.

PG You know through some of the struggles you have mentioned here about DH I always notice that you''re really good about communicating with him how you feel. I think that''s really good/important because we (I) tend to think DH''s are mind readers!.

ChinaThanks! Don''t they look like they are 2 year olds? hehe.

Vesper My sister''s oldest also regressed when his little brother was born. Totally normal. I know it sucks but hopefully he gets over it quickly....hang in there!!!. I also had my "I need the house back to myself" moments since I had family helping me the first couple of months. Reminding myself that it was temporary and that I really needed the help really got me through it!

MtJoya ughh...I''m sorry you''re upset. I think men sometimes just like to blame "hormones" for when we get upset. I hate that!. We have all gone through some up and downs with the husbands because my God...having a baby really changes EVERYTHING!. I learned two important things: 1) If you want them to do something. Ask them directly...with very clear directions. 2) Once they do it, don''t criticize how they did it!....in fact, do the opposite and tell them how wonderful they are and what a great job they did. Men are just made different than women...and well, I found I was better off accepting that and changing my attitude about the whole situation early on...instead of "expecting" he would do things I would just flat out ask that he does them. It works better for everyone!.

***

I know I''m missing more...but it''s past my bedtime!!!

Thank you all for the ncie comments about my delicious fat chubby babies with 1,000,000 rolls

...yum, yum. I love those little men!

 

[Mandarine]

ohhh...definitely anted to add something else!.

I started putting the sleep sacks on the boys for naps and they have now started to nap 45 minutes to an hour.

THIS. NEVER. HAPPENS.

They usually nap 20-30 mins!!!

I'm not sure if it's the sleep sacks, or a growth spurt, or the shots...or all of the above. But they are napping like CHAMPS!.

I have a couple of fleece sleep sacks for the night time (we put the AC at 69F so it gets chilly in here!). For the daytime I got a pair of Aden&Anais sleep sacks...LOVE THEM!. I got them on sale at diapers.com.

So anyway, thought I would post in case that helps anyone!. We're swaddle free and now they're addicted to their sleep sacks, but I'm 100% ok with that! ...They look so comfy in them I swear I wish I had one myself! hehe.


ETA: So that's 3 or 4 one hour naps a DAY plus their usual night sleep.

. They must just be growing right?. Or maybe just more tired since they are more mobile now? Who knows. I still attribute some of it to sleep sacks!

 

[MonkeyPie]

Natalina, omgosh, she is BEAUTIFUL! What a little sweetheart!

 

[Mara]

yah for sleep sacks mandarine!! i have 3 of those for J just waiting for when he is ready. right now i nap him with arms out, in his sleep positioner and with a knitted blanket my mom made for him tucked around the crib sides. he''s still such a leg waver i don''t know if he is ready for sleep sacks yet. and he does 45min-1 hour for naps about 2-3x a day. i keep looking at the sleep sacks but we haven''t tried them yet.

and omg your house is 69 at night?? ours is 73 and i swear J''s room feels colder even though the grobag egg says 73. he likes it warm for sure, he goes down for the night in a sleeper then the miracle blanket on top of that and the room is 73. i used to sleep him in long sleeved tshirts only and legs not covered but then he will get a leg out of the MB and it gets cold and it wakes him up.

speaking of sleep, i have noticed he is starting to want to sleep with his cheek ''against'' something. he usually works himself down a bit through his positioner til he can lay his cheek near it and sleep.

re: tummy time...J likes boppy tummy time better too. and sometimes if i put him on his arms on the floor mat right next to the sliding glass doors he is entertained by being able to look outside. but most times he just HATES it and will scream and cry and turn all red but i make him do his 10 min! his legs are crazy strong but his arms def need work.

nat love her cute little hat!! and congrats on the house!
mandarine forgot to say the boys are sooo cute but you knew that already hehee.
PG all the stuff your hub has planned would drive me crazy too. G has been a little too busy for me lately what with his work travel and some music stuff but it''s a finite thing and he knows it too so he''s going to back off a bit.

did anyone else fill out the census for your kid and go ''what the heck do i check?'' when it comes to race? they need to really get better at having more options on those things due to all the mixed race kids nowadays!

i have an early confession. i am finally admitting to myself that i wish i could be a SAHM. not because i don''t love my work, i do. and i like my company, my coworkers, and i sure as heck LIKE my salary. but as the hours are counting down for me to return, i realize that i am going to have such a hard time missing out on J''s development, literally from one day to the next he changes. i saw him doing something today that he was not doing 2 days ago...and i won''t be around to see all the little things. it makes it a little better that at least my mom will be watching him, but it''s still not ME and yes it''s selfish because *I* want to be there. greg wants me to stay home with him, but financially it would be tight as our area is really expensive and our mortgage and prop taxes are

and i have never ''relied'' on anyone so one salary would be mentally hard for me. i plan to return to work and we''ll see how it goes. if it''s unbearable, we''ll figure it out. if i did it, i would want to stay with him until 1.5-2 years old at which point i''d be ok with daycare for him and he''d prob love it, so it would only be about a year or so i''d be out. anyway. it''s the typical struggle it seems. blah.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Do I have the only baby that LOVES tummy time? He would stay on his tummy all day long if I let him. Bad mommy confession #1 - he is asleep on his tummy right now, because he is right next to me and he sleeps so much better on his tummy than his back. Bad mommy confession #2 - I can smell that he is wet (yay for mommy nose), but I haven''t changed him because he is sleeping SO well, and he barely napped all day. Poor baby. I hope I am not scarring him for life or anything

 

[Mara]

MP i used to let J nap on his tummy in his boppy when i sat next to him, he loved it when he was newborn, but after about 8 weeks he was over it and won''t sleep that way now. it was so cute, i got some great pictures. here is one from when he was about... maybe 4 weeks old?

 

[MonkeyPie]

Lol Mara I have one almost like that - Micah was being the centerpiece of my mom''s kitchen table last weekend, when he was 4 weeks old, too. He was just on a pillow, though, and the nap only lasted about 20 minutes. He also looks like he''s smothering but he wasn''t!

 

[mtjoya]

Thank you ladies for all your input. I hate going to sleep mad and just laying there trying my best to sleep and can''t. Everyone is asleep except for me. But thank you guys for sharing your stories. I feel better that I am not alone. I will take into consideration the fact that I have to maybe next time try to draw a diagram to see that he gets it. I guess that I will try to make up for having a s**tty mother''s day by going to get me something special!

I asked my brother what he got my sis-in-law for mother''s day. I was surprised cuz he was like I got her a wallet, a necklace (custom jewelry) she like Guess & Juicy, and a bunch of other stuff that I don''t remember. He also said it was something small. I was like

That is something, it''s the thought that counts! They even got me a pair of earrings, that was nice. But anyways, thanks again for your comments. I feel so comforted and happy. I don''t like to tell my friends cuz you know how that goes.

****

I love all the bebe pics!

Mandy-The boys are soooo beautiful! They are going to be studs when they grow up!

Mara-J is such a cutie! I love when they sleep and keep a little bit of their mouth open!

MP-Micah is so cute! My little nephew has those mittens!

****

Here is a pic of J! I was trying to take a pic of her and silly closed her eyes! She looks soo funny!

 

[steph72276]

Hey, girls. I''ve got a busy day planned with the boys today. I''ve gotta make myself go for a jog after I get A dropped off at school, then we have to do more shopping...E has suddenly grown (mostly in his length and HUGE BELLY) so we have to go get him a few more sleepers to wear at night since most have feet and poor baby was smooshed into them when they just fit last week! Then we have a playdate at the park for A afterschool and then I''m making dinner (stuffed shells, homemade rosemary bread, salad and homemade chocolate chip cookies

) for a friend that had a baby last week. Hope everyone has a great day!

Mara, I know exactly how you feel about returning to work b/c I felt the same way when I did it with A. I really was excited to go back until about a week before and then I was like

. I called my mom crying on the first day back from the car going "why did I decide to do this?" And seriously, it only took like a week before I was fine and enjoying my job again. I had Adam''s sister watching Andrew then, so I felt okay about leaving him with family too. It will all be okay, I promise. It takes a while to get back in the groove of things, but you will remember why you loved your job and it is nice to get out again. I would actually like to go back to teaching, but right now is a horrible time since they are letting teachers go right and left, so I will be at home for a while longer, but I am sort of itching to get out....grass is always greener, right? You and J will be just fine girl!!

Anchor, so sorry about your inlaws.

Mandi, you boys are SOOOO adorable. I just love their chubbs

Fiery, big hugs to you. You are such a wonderful mother. I''m glad you are getting help sweetie, and we are here for you too.

MP, M is adorable and glad he is doing so well for you!

China, that is such a funny picture with the TV. I say sometimes it''s whatever works to keep them entertained. His brain won''t fall out from watching a few minutes!!

Amber,

to your news!

Pandora, that is awesome that the museums there are free. EVERYTHING here cost $$. The zoo sounds like fun.

Viz, C sounds like such a cutie with his cuddling...that''s how my A was and I hope E is too!

EB, sounds like a fun bday party. I think it is great to keep things simple for their first couple of bdays b/c they get overwhelmed with too many people. And the cake sounds so yummy!

Tao, oh no to him throwing up the food. Hopefully he just didn''t like the taste of that one and he will like others.

Viz, your boys look so sweet together.

Jcrow, I would get a pump too so you can have your hubby help out sometimes or you guys could go out for the night at some point. Hope you''re doing well!

MTJ, so sorry you had such a crappy Mother''s Day. Really, men don''t get it sometimes. It is stressful these first few months. I hope you guys can sit down and chat about things. Hugs.

PG, if my DH planned so many activities without running them by me first, I would be upset too. It is not fair to you to be stuck at home by yourself with the baby that many nights. I would just sit him down and say something like "look, I am okay with you planning something x number of nights per week, but I would really like you to be here to enjoy family time together all the other nights". Hugs.

Kim, glad you guys are doing well.

Natalina, she is GORGEOUS!!!

Hi, CDT, Sugarpie, Nov, Sabine, TGAL, Bella, LL, Sha, QT, and anyone else I missed!!

 

[gingerB]

hi ladies

i''ve been trying to keep up but finding time to post these days seems near impossible!

first of all...loving all the bebe pics...so much deliciousness!!!

fiery and viz...i want to give you two big hugs. hang in there.

i''''m going to apologize for my update only post as i only have a few minutes before i have to hit the ground running again.

so unfort my appt mon did not resolve the issue. i saw another surgeon and he thinks it''s something called granulomatous mastitis, but we can''t completely rule out abscess until the cultures come back. at first i was happy that it wasn''t an abscess, but after reading up on gm and all it entails, i am now rooting for an abscess. you know your in the midst of (and i quote viz) a poo storm when you are hoping you have an abscess

.

 

[steph72276]

Aww, sorry you didn''t get any answers yet Ginger....thinking of you. Hang in there girl.

 

[phoenixgirl]

Quick question . . . would you feel uncomfortable with your DH opening a joint checking account with his mother, especially if said mother is unstable and probably filing for divorce and bankruptcy? Ugh. She asked him to do it so he could write and deposit checks for her (because she is so busy with her part time job????). He thinks she feels alone and wants someone to look out for her. I think this has trouble written all over it. What if she overdrafts, what if she wants him to deposit our money, what if there are money battles with the divorce, etc. etc.

 

[Sabine]

PG YES I would have a major problem with that! She probably is looking for someone to look after her, and she needs to learn to look after herself (with the support of her friends/family of course, but still) and the sooner she learns that and how to DO that the better! Otherwise you''ll end up having your MIL moving in with you before you know it! My parents divorced a bit later in life, and honestly, it was THE best thing for my mom...she had to learn how to do so many things for herself and she really ended up blooming...going to school, joining groups that do all sorts of fun activities and trips, etc.

 

[steph72276]

PG, I would absolutely NOT do that!!!! I would tell your husband to go over there and help her set up her account, show her how to track her money, make deposits, etc. and have his mother give him passwords to her account so he can help her monitor the account, but in NO WAY would I ever have him sign up for a joint account. You are right, it has trouble written all over it and you guys would be responsible if anything happened.

 

[vizsla]

i have a busy day today but i wanted to do a quicky post

ginger - crap on a cracker! i hope you get some resolve soon.. limbo stinks and we need to get you better mamma! keep us posted!

PG - maybe b/c charlie is a (cough) difficult sleeper i always wonder 'how does PG do it?' - especially with all of the activities your DH is involved in. i think it's awesome that he DOES have so many hobbies, but i don't think i would stay as sane as i do without DH being around as much as he is. we totally get on each other's nerves

but at least there is another 'body' around for comfort. i totally admire the fact that you do talk to DH about his outside commitments vs. home commitments - and really, guys just don't 'get it'. not an excuse b/c i loathe when DH says 'you have to explain to me when you feel X' - 'umm no i don't - i *feel* like a human' anyhoo... hang in there.. i'm sure once school is over things will feel easier? or at least i hope they do. summertime is probably more nutso with the activities right? it's almost like you two need to make a family schedule and put it on the fridge to map out the month?? (just thinking out loud here) ((HUGS))
oh, and i do see trouble with a joint checking account. my dad did a huge amount of damage to my credit in high school when he opened up an account with my name.

it has taken all my 'adult' life to clean up that credit disaster!

mara - yeah.. it's crazy - before kids you will "never" do, say, want, aspire to be a certain way.... then one day - i've eaten many a words..

if there is one thing this kiddo has taught me is to stop saying the word "never". because everything i said i would "never" want... i DO!!! i totally get what you are saying about missing j's milestones etc. it doesn't seem fair that we have to go back to work right when our babies are getting "fun". i often think, do i really have to wait until C has kids before i can stay home with a baby? the whole system is whack - we need some sort of maternity leave reform for sure.. if not for us, but for our children's generation. ((HUGS)) the first month back to work was the PITS... but i'm sure you remember my posts from that time

fiery - how are you today girlie?? miss your posts!!

i'm so sorry i'm not keeping up with everyone else....

forgive!
the pictures are be-YOND cute... smooches all around!!!

don't even want to get into my broken record complaining.. still up all night, still not sleeping, still tired... has a terrible cough and runny nose - which makes me think he's never going to kick this latest ear infection if he's constantly sick. been pulling at his ear lately which makes me so sad... and i'm at work all day

oh, i've got to stop posting until i have something good to say....

 

[fieryred33143]

Sorry, hope you ladies don''t mind the Debby Downer/Negative Nancy me-centric post for a moment.

Last night I had a bit of a breakdown at home after S had gone to bed. I couldn''t think straight and had to breathe into a bag with my head between my legs. I had the same moment just a few minutes ago here at work but I walked to the bathroom to calm myself down.

And I realized that it''s not S and it''s not motherhood. It''s work. I''m stressed to the max and am finally at the end of my rope. I just can''t deal with it anymore. The problem is like FI says "You have been fine with the stress for the past 5 years, what has changed in the past couple of months?"

I don''t know if the answer is that now I''m a mom or if I''m just unhappy or what but I seriously cannot deal with the stress anymore. I''ve always dealt with stress really well-I used to manage a fast food restaurant, manager of a retail store, at one point I was taking 5 classes and working 3 jobs running on 3-4 hours of sleeps and little catnaps all day. I had no problems managing the stress at all. Now I just can''t do it.

While I was in the bathroom I wanted to walk over to my boss and say that I quit. I seriously felt that I would much rather risk losing everything-health insurance, our place, cars, credit, etc-than spend another minute working. And I know this is not something I can do. The option of just quitting and taking some time off does not exist but for a moment I really did not care. And then I tried to think of it a little more logically and decided that maybe I should just take a 5 day vacation. But I started to think of when I could do that...can''t be in the next 2 weeks because of my project, can''t be at the end of may because I''m out on business that week, can''t be the first 3 weeks of June because I''m assigned to another poject that has to get done in those 3 weeks. So I would only be able to take time off the week of June 21. And I get back to my desk and see an email that we may have to travel that same week.

It''s all just too much. And now I''m preparing for a meeting at 3 with someone that I know will be confrontational and I just want to sink into a hole

.

 

[cdt1101]

Fiery - I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I DEFINITELY think a vacation is in order. Is there anyway you can talk to your boss about taking a week off ASAP? Not sure what type of relationship you have w/ him/her but maybe if you explain a little of what's going on they'll be able to work w/ you??? At the very least it doesn't hurt to mention to you boss you need to take a few days off.

I wish I could hug you..hang in there.

 

[drk]

Damn the board ate my post!

Firey - hope you can feel better and destress work somehow soon. Sounds awful.
Viz - wish you were sleeping better.
Ginger - hope it''s "just" an abscess then. Sucks that you''re having to deal with this.

Diaper advice needed urgently. We''re heading away for vacation this afternoon and have to switch from our lovely diaper service prefolds to disposables while away. We have leftovr NB Pampers Swaddlers from when we brought her home, but I almost think they''re too small - fit ok in the waist, but seem a little tight on the srawny thighs and only barely reach her hipbones. DH bought a pack of Huggies NB for the trip since there''s that Drymax thingy right now. Kara''s 8lb7oz and just over 23" tall. Skinny and long. Would you recommend going up to size 1s, even though NB should be ok till 10lb? She''s almost 2 months old.