PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

[Mrs Mitchell]

I just popped into this threat to take a look at BPF (sooooo cute!) and I saw your post, Anchor. I''m so sorry to hear what you and your family went through. Hugs to you and Jacob and I hope you never, ever get a scare like that again, you poor thing.

Pandora, just wanted to say that if you''re really having a problem with dental treatment, you could look into sedation. I had a root canal treatment last week and it was a breeze with sedation, absolutely fine.

Jen

 

[sugarpie honeybun]

Anchor, I can''t imagine what you must''ve gone through this past week. While reading you story I had chills down my spine, but I am so glad everything worked out in the end.

 

[Mandarine]

Anchor I can''t imagine what you guys went through!!!!...wow, that is just terrible! How scary!!!!!!!!!!
I am happy to hear you''re all home now and Jacob is feeling better!!! Hugs!!

 

[AGBF]

Hi, Mara. I came visiting to see Julian. This is a great thread. The babies are at a great stage. (I should say that the babies are at great stages since between birth and 12 months they go through so much! I know that for my daughter, four months was a major turning point.)

At any rate, you said that sometimes you think Julian has hair like my daughter's? I don't think so. So many of the other babies his age have no hair that I understand why you might equate him with my daughter. I mean, Julian has hair and she has hair, so they share something: hair. But poor Whitney looks as if she is wearing a bad toupée whereas Julian looks as if he has a receding hairline. Was that too blunt? I forgot that you are a new mother. Never mind the wording. Whitney grew up to be beautiful. Julian is a handsome guy and chances are that he will continue along that path since you and Greg are so good looking. Someday he may even have hair.

PS-He is the most beautiful baby. I love the picture of him when he was younger, holding his sleep sheep!

Hugs,
Deb/AGBF

 

[Mara]

LOL thanks Deb. My Mom says the same thing re: Julian's hairline. He has all this baby fuzz towards the front. I am like he's a BABY ... Mom, that hair is going to fall out...it's not like he was born with a receding hairline! Oh and I didn't mean that W's hair is like J's hair, but their round little chubby cheeked, darker eyes, dark hair looks. W's hair is awesome...it's HUGE! My sister's hair was crazy like that, it was like a big astronaut helmet when she popped out. I was just glad J had HAIR when he came out, its one of my fave things, smoothing his little hair.

 

[fieryred33143]

Ugh I''m having major anxiety issues today.

I can''t pinpoint what is bothering me.

We had a choking/gagging episode during dinner w/ R''s parents last night. The thing is that I *know* it wasn''t Sophia''s doing. I gave her some puffs to snack on bc R''s mom doesn''t like to eat in front of her unless she''s eating too. She was doing fine. Normally she puts it in her mouth but only half of it and then pushes the other half in when she''s ready for it. Well, R''s dad thought he would help her by pushing it all in (lightly) and I guess it went too far back because she started gagging. His mom FLIPPED out yelling "OMG the baby is choking" and jumped out of her seat. I remained calm and grabbed Sophia before she could and just said that Sophia was fine as I patted her back.

But the whole thing just freaked me out and I couldn''t sleep last night. Tonight during dinner, R knew how I was feeling so he sat her in her chair and gave her puffs and a sippy cup with water while we ate dinner to "show" me that everything is ok. And it was ok and really cute. She would look at us eating and then eat a puff and if we drank from our cups, she''d try to drink out of hers (she couldn''t but tried).

But I''m still feeling anxious. I''ve checked her about 5 times in the past 30 mins. Ugh I hate when I feel like this. I always tell myself that she has to go through these things so that she learns but then it happens and all I want to do is cry. And I don''t know why I''m feeling this way. If its because she gagged, the look on her face, MILs reaction, feeling like I can''t handle "table" food, or a combo or everything together.

I''m going to take a hot shower and drink some tea. Hopefully the feeling will pass.

 

[AmberWaves]

Oh Anchor, how horrible. I''m so sorry you had to go through that nightmare. I hope Jacob is back to his normal self soon. You poor things.

Fiery: You are a good mommy. NFT.

 

[rockpaperscissors67]

Anchor, OMG, I was scared reading your post -- I can''t even imagine what hell it was to go through all of that. I hope that Jacob gets better really soon. I had meningitis when I was 11 and had 3 spinal taps; I simply cannot imagine one being done on a little baby. But then to have it all be for nothing??

As a side note to everyone: It''s a good idea to be aware of the symptoms of meningitis -- high fever, vomiting and a stiff neck. My mom took me to our GP 3 times in one day and he didn''t know what I had. I finally had to beg her to take me to the hospital and that''s where I was diagnosed. The stiff neck is the tell-tale symptom of meningitis, so if your child has the high fever and vomiting, you want to ask them if their neck hurts (provided they''re old enough to tell you).

MTJ, I''m glad you talked to your doc and that your DH is understanding better. I hope that the blues pass soon!

Mara, I''m so glad it was an equipment issue! When I used my PY, I had to change those white membranes fairly often (like every 4 weeks or so). One of the plastic tubes on mine also split a little bit where it connects to the white cap on the horn. That doesn''t seem to be a problem, but if I were using that pump again, I''d replace the tubes.

I hate to say it, but the distractability doesn''t get much better usually. As babies become more aware of what''s going on around them, they''re more likely to pop on and off so they don''t miss anything. I think this usually starts around 4 months or so, but it''s possible J is starting it now. Some babies are also really efficient nursers so they get everything they need in just a few minutes, so they might spend 10 minutes nursing instead of hanging out at the breast like they did as newborns.

Ginger, sounds like you''re doing everything right! The acting like he''s still starving after a bottle is really common. Since he''s growing and having plenty of diapers, I wouldn''t worry about it at all. If it''s any consolation, when I give Ben a bottle, he will cry when it''s done even though I am 99% sure he''s full. I give him a pacifier so that he can suck and that seems to do the trick. As far as I know, Ben doesn''t have reflux so I think this is just normal behavior.

Fiery, I''m so sorry that you''re having anxiety issues and that Sophia choked. Can I ask if you''ve always had anxiety issues or is this something new that started when Sophia came along? I wonder if it might be worth checking into some sort of treatment since it''s affecting your sleep?

=======

The anniversary party went great -- the ILs were surprised and MIL started crying when she saw everyone there. The food was yummy and the cake was amazingly beautiful. Everyone seemed to have a great time. I came home afterwards and passed out with Ben; I think stressing over this for the past couple of weeks took its toll on me.

After finding that one house that we like the other night, we started looking at other houses in the same area. Yesterday, we drove around looking at them and found this one that everyone -- kids included -- fell in love with immediately. I was absolutely sure that it wasn''t in our price range. It''s not listed on the realtor''s site yet, but after looking at the assessments and sale prices of other houses in that area, I''ve concluded that it IS possible the house is in our range. It''s a dutch colonial with lovely landscaping that makes it look like an english cottage. It''s also right across the street from the community pool, playground and tennis courts. I hope we''re able to get more information about it today. Fingers crossed!

And finally, baby related: Ben has not pooped in 4 days. I know that this is fine for a breastfed baby, so I''m not worried. He''s still having tons of wet diapers and acting normal...but OMG he has the WORST STINKY GAS EVER. I hope that he poops soon so the stinky gas will go away.

 

[Mandarine]

Good morning ladies

The boys started to turn the corner!!! Yayy!!! I posted a video on FB to show it....hehe

They are still whiney and last night wanted to be rocked to sleep FOREVER!. Finally, my back had it and I put them down (wide awake just like I used to!) and walked away. They screamed BLODDY murder............for FIVE minutes!. So there, they won''t manipulate mommy into this never ending rocking!!!. They slept better last night than any other day in the past 3 weeks. Only up once each and up for the day at a respectable 7:15am!!!. I''m happy because I start working today and feel so much more refreshed!!!

I wanted to ask about solids and oatmeal. Seems like EVERYONE I know with younger babies has already started! I don''t get the hurry!!!. I''m still waiting 2 or 3 more weeks (they are 5 months and a week or so now). Anywho, as you may know, the boys are on the formula AR (Added rice starch) and they are constipated as it is. I know they recommend to start with rice cereal...but I''m afraid if I do they won''t go for DAYS! (they go like every other day now...and it''s hard poop!). I asked the Dr if I could start with oatmeal and she said they still recommend rice cereal. I want to go with my mommy instinct here and start them with oatmeal instead. Is there anything I''m missing? Is there a valid reason to not start with oatmeal??


***

RPS So glad the party went well!!!. I know you BF, but could you give him some sort of juice to help him? (I don''t know if he takes a bottle at all?). My boys have always been constipated, it sucks

Fiery I think it''s normal to feel anxious every so often....but just keep an eye out for how you feel. As moms I am sure we will experience MANY MANY more scares...but like with everything, the first few times I think are the hardest! So just hang in there momma!!!

 

[E B]

Remember me?

Been MIA during our move. Now that we're settled in, I can catch up a little. Not only were we moving, but H caught his first real cold. Coughing, sneezing, the works. It was awful. He's finally over it, for the most part, but is very cranky today. A new tooth, maybe?

First, I LOVE BFP. Gorgeous babies.

Ginger- fiery is right. In the beginning, the growth spurts seem to come back to back. It gets better, I promise, and I have a champion eater. He's 9 months old and still needs to feed once during the night.

Anchor- Poor Jacob and poor you! What an ordeal. I'm so glad to hear it wasn't something more serious, even though a UTI is no fun.

Fiery- Oh, hon, I'm sorry. I think a certain level of anxiety is normal, esp. as a first time parent. Gagging seems to be normal at this stage, even if something is pushed in lightly. Part of the learning to eat process, I guess. H even gags on his purees once in a while. I hope the feeling has passed.

RPS- How exciting! Can't wait to hear more about the house.

Mandarine- How about starting with something like pears, or prunes? May help with the constipation. We didn't give rice cereal until, well...we technically haven't, yet! I give H prepared food that's a veggie/brown rice combo for dinner, but we haven't actually given him rice cereal from a box yet.

In Henry news, he's now actually crawling! He took his first crawl steps (?) on St. Patrick's Day (two days before he turned nine months), and since, he's managed to get around pretty well. We also finally bought him a high chair, so this is my super late, courtesy-of-my-iPhone BFP submission!

(Don't worry, I tightened the straps after the photo was taken.)

 

[rockpaperscissors67]

Quick update:

Our darling son finally pooped and OMG I do not want him to ever go for days without again! His diaper must have weighed 20 lbs. and he had poop everywhere. LOL!

The lovely house is as good as sold -- there''s a contract on it and they''re doing the inspection this week. I don''t know whether it''s a good or bad thing that I found out that the list price was right in our price range. The good news is that I talked to the listing agent and Wednesday night, we''re meeting her to go see several other houses in that same subdivision. All of them would be perfectly fine for us; I don''t think I will LOVE any of them, but I''m ok with only really liking a house as long as it has everything we want.

 

[vizsla]

hi everyone-

ginger FWIW - little ones with reflux often eat more often because it helps soothe the pain in their tummies - and a lot of the time they will eat small meals every hour to 2 hours to keep the acid down. during the height of c's reflux from about 6-10 weeks he was eating every 2 hours round the clock. if we skip a dose or two of prevacid even now, we know it b/c he will go back to eating very frequently and small meals.

fiery - i'm anxious by nature and have a hard time getting past little scary spells too. i have nothing but empathy and hugs for you.. it's hard when your brain says 'everything is OK' but your body is still reacting to the anxiety.

mandy - i wonder the same thing about rice (probably b/c it is fortified with iron??) anyhoo i have heard that rice can bind LO up too... and c is so so so sensitive to any type of intestinal discomfort. i thought the same thing about starting with oatmeal. our pedi wanted us to try just a tablespoon of rice cereal first.. so maybe i'll do that for a few days and if everything seems OK just switch to oatmeal. 3 days of 1 tbs can't bind him up that much right?? oh, and she wanted us to start cereal around 5 months but not start any food food until our 6month check with her.

rps - congrats on the party! and hooray for house hunting! i dream of having a driveway one day

anchor - OMG so so so so so scary! hugs!
__________

well the only thing that nighttime consistency has gotten me is that c is consistently NOT sleeping. i counted.... friday, saturday and sunday night ....... 11 times each night - retraction - 11 *different* times (not to be confused with the 3 or 4 PU/PD sessions for each time he wakes up). ELEVEN! so yeah, once an HOUR, all night for 20-30 mins each time he wakes up.

i've been doing the same thing for 2 weeks now... isn't it supposed to be getting BETTER??

i'm telling you, this kid follows NOTHING... i swear he would STTN if i did something different every night b/c he's the complete OPPOSITE of every other baby.

 

[anchor31]

Mara - You asked about other symptoms than the fever to indicate he was sick... The afternoon before he started his fever he has less of an appetite, but a smaller appetite doesn''t automatically mean a baby is sick. He didn''t seem to be uncomfortable peeing; he loves to pee when I change him and finds it hilarious, so I was surprised when they finally told me it was a UTI. The resident said that sometimes symptoms of certain illnesses are different in babies and adults. Sometimes Jacob can be warm too, but when he woke up that night he was really really warm, abnormally so. So I took his temperature and sure enough it was 103F.

Re: bedtime - Is 12 weeks too early to try to train Jacob to go to bed earlier at night? So far it''s nearly impossible to put him to bed before 10PM and we''d really like to see him go down at 8PM instead. We don''t expect him to sleep through to 8AM, he usually has one or two night feedings. Any ideas on how to do this without CIO?

 

[Mandarine]

Viz wow...you''re a Saint!!!!. That''s just crazy!!!!!. I know you are opposed to CIO....and I''m not saying it''s your only option, but sometimes we think babies will cry for hours and all they really cry for is like 5 minutes. Have you tried letting him before going in, or pick up/put down awake, etc?...maybe just tiny little things gradually will help. Heck I really don''t know what will help...but I hope it starts getting better for you guys!!!

Anchor At 4 weeks I started the bedtime routine with my boys to put them down by 8pm. It really only took like a week and then they gradually moved their bedtime closer to 7pm (I liked 8pm, but apparently they were ready before then!). I basically just started their bedtime routine at 7pm (bath on bath days, diaper change, PJs, bottle, swaddle, white noise, sing, rocking) and would rock them until they were OUT! (the first days for almost an hour!). After a few days they would go down sooner and sooner. At 8 weeks we weaned them from the rocking...at 16 weeks or so started to wean them off the swaddle...so now the bedtime routine is simple (bath on bath days, diapers, bottle, white noise -a loud fan!-, one song -same song every night-, down to bed).

 

[Sha]

Date: 3/20/2010 3:57:30 PM
Author: dreamer_d
Sha How old is delila? How much does she nap in the daytime? I ask because by about 3 months, I would expect a longer ''night'' time that 8 hours. More like 12 hours. Not sleeping all the way, waking for feedings in that 12 hours period, but otherwise sleeping for 12 hours. I wonder if her wakefulness is partly sleep deprivation? I know this has come up before, but I would aim to put her to ''bed'' by 8pm at the latest if she is up for the day at 8am.

Thanks for your comment, Dreamer. Dalila is 3 months and 3 weeks old. She takes at least 4 naps per day - usually a little over an hour each. I do agree that she should be sleeping longer at nighttime generally, especially with all those wake-ups. I''ve been trying to move her bedtime forward every week, - for the past 8 weeks she was really going to sleep too late (between 10-12 pm). Last week it was 9:30 pm - so this week will be 8:30 pm, which I think I''ll try to keep it at.

Don''t know what happened last night - but she slept for 3 1/2 hours in the first stretch, then another 3 1/2 hours, then 2 hours. MUCH better than the previous nights. Maybe it was because she had a busy day yesterday - not sure. I just hope it continues!

 

[Sha]

Anchor - sorry to hear what you and Jacob went through.

How scary!! And totally unnecessary too.

I would be angry myself!

Re: Jacob's bedtime - have you tried moving it forward by half-hour intervals? I used to put Dalila to bed late, but am moving her bedtime forward by half-hour intervals every week. This week we're finally where I want it to be - 8:30 pm. She doesn't have a problem falling asleep after eating, though. Not sure if Jacob is the same.

Fiery - sorry to hear about the anxiety as well. As a mom, I know it's hard not to think about all the horrible things that can happen. I read a quote somewhere that said, "Motherhood is like walking around with your heart outside of your body" or something like that. So true. I know another poster asked if anxiety was an issue before...? If so, I can imagine that that would only make things worse.

vizla - I feel you on the sleep issue!!

But Yikes. You have to get up evey more than I do... You must be exhausted!!

I don't remember what you wrote about CIO...I should've looked it up before posting...but are you sure you don't want to give it another try? The first time I tried CIO I relented and went to Dalila, thinking, "Nooo, I'm not going to do this... I don't want her to her last emotions before falling asleep to be frantic crying. Sleeptime should be peaceful..." . But two night ago when she was waking up almost every hour, I felt like I didn't have a choice but to try it again. It's still early days, but I think there might be something to it. The two nights she fell asleep after CIO, she slept for an additional 2 hours. Since then she hasn't done the waking-up-every-hour thing. I do go to her when she cries at the 2-3 hour interval, though, because I figure she's crying for food.

Here's any interesting article on CIO that DH referred me to last week, if anyone wants to read it: The Battle over Cry-It-Out Sleep Training

EB - Nice pic! Henry is a cute little guy! I love his big, bright eyes.

RPS - Did you and your SO discuss the marriage/insurance again?

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 3/22/2010 11:25:56 AM
Author: anchor31
Mara - You asked about other symptoms than the fever to indicate he was sick... The afternoon before he started his fever he has less of an appetite, but a smaller appetite doesn''t automatically mean a baby is sick. He didn''t seem to be uncomfortable peeing; he loves to pee when I change him and finds it hilarious, so I was surprised when they finally told me it was a UTI. The resident said that sometimes symptoms of certain illnesses are different in babies and adults. Sometimes Jacob can be warm too, but when he woke up that night he was really really warm, abnormally so. So I took his temperature and sure enough it was 103F.

Re: bedtime - Is 12 weeks too early to try to train Jacob to go to bed earlier at night? So far it''s nearly impossible to put him to bed before 10PM and we''d really like to see him go down at 8PM instead. We don''t expect him to sleep through to 8AM, he usually has one or two night feedings. Any ideas on how to do this without CIO?

No, it''s not. It may take some manipulation of his entire day, but it can be done. Does he go down now without crying at 10? If so, you can begin to inch it forward in 30 minute increments (or even 15 if you want to). Without knowing your daytime schedule, it''s hard to say if anything needs to be adjusted during the day.

Even though I am an advocate of CIO (and did use it in the later months when Amelia had a few days not wanting to be put down), I never had to use it once in getting her to sleep the 7 to 7 stretch. Before anything happens, the baby needs to be able to self soothe. We chose to do this with the two methods that wouldn''t require me to be around - a paci and a tight swaddle. I also hear white noise is great for that as well.

Once she got that down, we could start to play with sleep times a bit more. We did this starting at 6 weeks, which is also the time we moved her to her crib. We got her used to the crib, her surroundings, and went from there.

For us it was easier to lay down the foundation and then deal with the building.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 3/22/2010 11:33:20 AM
Author: Mandarine
Viz wow...you''re a Saint!!!!. That''s just crazy!!!!!. I know you are opposed to CIO....and I''m not saying it''s your only option, but sometimes we think babies will cry for hours and all they really cry for is like 5 minutes. Have you tried letting him before going in, or pick up/put down awake, etc?...maybe just tiny little things gradually will help. Heck I really don''t know what will help...but I hope it starts getting better for you guys!!!

Anchor At 4 weeks I started the bedtime routine with my boys to put them down by 8pm. It really only took like a week and then they gradually moved their bedtime closer to 7pm (I liked 8pm, but apparently they were ready before then!). I basically just started their bedtime routine at 7pm (bath on bath days, diaper change, PJs, bottle, swaddle, white noise, sing, rocking) and would rock them until they were OUT! (the first days for almost an hour!). After a few days they would go down sooner and sooner. At 8 weeks we weaned them from the rocking...at 16 weeks or so started to wean them off the swaddle...so now the bedtime routine is simple (bath on bath days, diapers, bottle, white noise -a loud fan!-, one song -same song every night-, down to bed).

Agree. I think by a certain age (debating what that age is, but that''s another story) babies can be conditioned to realize that a signal leads to something. In our case, the swaddle and paci were only given for sleep, so that signaled to her to calm down. For Mandy''s twins, it could be the same song.

It doesn''t hurt to try this...at best, it works and the baby will learn to read the signals. At worst, you get tired of the bloody song.

I figure, if lab rats can be conditioned to certain behaviors, isn''t my child smarter than a lab rat? I''m being facetious, of course, but you get the idea.

 

[gingerB]

fiery - thanks for that timeline, it helps to have an approximation of when to expect the crazy feeding frenzies! we only did the formula for 2 days, as an experiment that obviously failed. but what are your kids for if you can''t experiment a bit

sleep when baby sleeps is just hard to come by when he''s awake every 2-3 and i have to pump every 2-3 in addition so we''re pretty darn tired. sorry about the scare and sophia choking. glad she''s ok though.

mara - we THINK he has some mild reflux, but nothing confirmed as we don''t have a pedi appt. A does 21-27, avging mostly 24 oz. i know its a lot, but he is seriously not satisfied with an oz less (my little oinker) i worry aboiut it abit, but he doesn''t really spit up (unless we give him more, which we don''t after the first few spit ups) and he''s actually not that chubby. i think his growth is length wise because at 5 weeks he''s still fitting NB clothes width wise, but is flooding

and i tried the 0-3m this weekend which were loose around, but the length was better. that coupled with his humongo feet has DH hoping for a basketball player

. it''s good to hear that our child is not the only screamer while burping. we do it anyway but he sure does make me feel like i''m torturing him!

mandy - yay for the boys feeling better!

rps -

for the party going off well and

for finally getting a poop (although thumbs down for the 20 lber -- we''ve def had some of those -- no fun

) booo for the house being sold. def sending happy house hunting vibes your way. we do the paci after the bottle too, and he usually calms down which reassures us that he is full as we suspect.

EB - omg what gorgeous soulful eyes little H has! and so exciting that he''s starting to crawl! btw, which high chair is that?

in A news -- i believe he may be conspiring to drive mom and dad bonkers.

j/k

seriously though, this kid spends one whole day napping continously, then is wide awake and cute the next day then naps all day the day after while being a total grouch in between because he''s obviously exhausted from refusing to nap the day before. and btw, the wide wake pleasnt day occured during his one month party (a vietnamese tradition) so the whole family just went on and on about what a pleasant easy baby we had. so well behaved! which was nice in a way, but then no one believed us that this was a facade and the little fuss bucket who does rise is hiding in there. and we really are tired and don''t have it THAT easy.

in other news, last night i put in the 150th oz of BM in the freezer!

which sounds nice but really is only about 6 days worth of bm

but i''m still pumping away and my goal is to have about 1 months worth before i go back to work. wish me luck ladies!

 

[Mara]

thanks anchor and RPS for the additional info re: the meningitis and the UTI. scary stuff!!

re: moving the bedtime up, i''d love to do that with J but every time we try to move it up like 30 min (just by starting routine sooner) he typically won''t actually GO DOWN comfortably til 10 so the extra 30 min we just end up soothing for sleep. i''d love to get him to 8pm actually, but i dunno. maybe i should just try to start earlier and put him down at 8 rather than doing the gradual 30 min move up since that doesn''t seem to be working all that great.

and... moms with babies that aren''t sleeping, please don''t beat me..BUTTTT putting him down earlier is becoming more important because he is starting to go longer and longer stretches of sleep. the last 2 nights have been 9 and 9.5 hours. so since he goes down at 10 that puts his wakeup at 7 and 7:30. but i still need 2-3 more hours of sleep out of him and it''s easiest to get it right after feeding him his bottle at his wakeup, because he''s still tired and sleepy. it worked great when he was getting up at 4 or 5am since that means he sleeps til like 8 or 9 BUT now that he is getting up at 7, putting him down at 8am when it''s bright outside is harder...we keep all the blinds and shades closed but it''s like he knows it''s daylight and struggles more when we put him back down. SO if we could move bedtime up a bit if he DOES keep sleeping longer then it puts his wakeup for bottle at a more manageable 5am''ish. Also the other thing is Greg loves to feed him at his wakeup and he leaves for work between 6-8am depending on the day. So if J woke up at 4 or 5 then G could still feed him but if he keeps waking up at 7 or 7:30 then I do it and G misses out. ANYWAY that was a lot of words to say J needs an earlier bedtime lol. esp by the time i go back to work in 7 weeks, because right now it''s easy for me to kind of do whatever or have a weird ''non schedule'' with him, but when i go back to work i''d really like us to be on some routine.

of course by the time i get him to start sleeping at 8pm he will prob be like ''you know what i am over this sleeping long stretches thing. time to irritate mom and only sleep 4 hours !!''... because even though he has been a consistently great sleeper since day 1...i don''t have hopes that we will ESCAPE having to deal with sleep trauma, it seems like it''s a rite of passage for a new mom at some point.

viz i''m sorry to hear things aren''t getting better. since you have been trying something for 2 weeks (sorry i dont remember what it is)..maybe it''s time to modify it slightly and/or try something new? have you considered getting a sleep consultant in? i know we have them locally here because i have a friend who used one, but not sure if you do?

fiery awww you are a great mom and i think your worries are normal. we had a scare the first night we brought J home, FIRST NIGHT, where he was choking on some spitup, and we couldn''t get him to breathe for like 10 seconds. scariest 10 seconds of my life and the first day home with him!! after that i was super paranoid for a few days about him, i think i realized then just how fragile they really are. it was a grand day for me when he put out his first COUGH and i realized he could clear his lungs on his own. but they do have to go through these things, and i guess us as moms do too. you never stop worrying about your babies. i just try to think ...worry about what i can and keep my fingers crossed on things i can''t control.

rps good luck on house hunting! it''s fun and stressful at the same time. and i am so glad i figured out the pump issue, i was really getting stressed about not emptying my boobs!!

oh and in fun news we finally booked Hawaii ... YAY!!! 4 star resort with an ocean view and fnu with our friends. we are so excited. and my freezer stash is growing, so i am doubly excited. now if i can just get my mom to learn to swaddle J correctly and not with material up around his head

(''but his head is cold'') i''d be ecstatic.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 3/22/2010 12:47:27 PM
Author: Mara
thanks anchor and RPS for the additional info re: the meningitis and the UTI. scary stuff!!

re: moving the bedtime up, i''d love to do that with J but every time we try to move it up like 30 min (just by starting routine sooner) he typically won''t actually GO DOWN comfortably til 10 so the extra 30 min we just end up soothing for sleep. i''d love to get him to 8pm actually, but i dunno. maybe i should just try to start earlier and put him down at 8 rather than doing the gradual 30 min move up since that doesn''t seem to be working all that great.

and... moms with babies that aren''t sleeping, please don''t beat me..BUTTTT putting him down earlier is becoming more important because he is starting to go longer and longer stretches of sleep. the last 2 nights have been 9 and 9.5 hours. so since he goes down at 10 that puts his wakeup at 7 and 7:30. but i still need 2-3 more hours of sleep out of him and it''s easiest to get it right after feeding him his bottle at his wakeup, because he''s still tired and sleepy. it worked great when he was getting up at 4 or 5am since that means he sleeps til like 8 or 9 BUT now that he is getting up at 7, putting him down at 8am when it''s bright outside is harder...we keep all the blinds and shades closed but it''s like he knows it''s daylight and struggles more when we put him back down. SO if we could move bedtime up a bit if he DOES keep sleeping longer then it puts his wakeup for bottle at a more manageable 5am''ish. Also the other thing is Greg loves to feed him at his wakeup and he leaves for work between 6-8am depending on the day. So if J woke up at 4 or 5 then G could still feed him but if he keeps waking up at 7 or 7:30 then I do it and G misses out. ANYWAY that was a lot of words to say J needs an earlier bedtime lol. esp by the time i go back to work in 7 weeks, because right now it''s easy for me to kind of do whatever or have a weird ''non schedule'' with him, but when i go back to work i''d really like us to be on some routine.

of course by the time i get him to start sleeping at 8pm he will prob be like ''you know what i am over this sleeping long stretches thing. time to irritate mom and only sleep 4 hours !!''... because even though he has been a consistently great sleeper since day 1...i don''t have hopes that we will ESCAPE having to deal with sleep trauma, it seems like it''s a rite of passage for a new mom at some point.

viz i''m sorry to hear things aren''t getting better. since you have been trying something for 2 weeks (sorry i dont remember what it is)..maybe it''s time to modify it slightly and/or try something new? have you considered getting a sleep consultant in? i know we have them locally here because i have a friend who used one, but not sure if you do?

fiery awww you are a great mom and i think your worries are normal. we had a scare the first night we brought J home, FIRST NIGHT, where he was choking on some spitup, and we couldn''t get him to breathe for like 10 seconds. scariest 10 seconds of my life and the first day home with him!! after that i was super paranoid for a few days about him, i think i realized then just how fragile they really are. it was a grand day for me when he put out his first COUGH and i realized he could clear his lungs on his own. but they do have to go through these things, and i guess us as moms do too. you never stop worrying about your babies. i just try to think ...worry about what i can and keep my fingers crossed on things i can''t control.

rps good luck on house hunting! it''s fun and stressful at the same time. and i am so glad i figured out the pump issue, i was really getting stressed about not emptying my boobs!!

oh and in fun news we finally booked Hawaii ... YAY!!! 4 star resort with an ocean view and fnu with our friends. we are so excited. and my freezer stash is growing, so i am doubly excited. now if i can just get my mom to learn to swaddle J correctly and not with material up around his head

(''but his head is cold'') i''d be ecstatic.

Mara, when''s his last nap before you attempt to get him down for the night?

 

[Mara]

ginger the fact that you said A won''t be satisfied til he eats a lot is what makes me wonder about the reflux or gas yanno, just because the sucking IS soothing to them. i can almost tell when J is hungry vs when he just doesn''t feel good and wants to be soothed. seriously i am like you do not need 7 oz of food kid...you are not that big!!! but he eats it and doesn''t spit it up and then feels ok ... but i tend to think the last 1oz or 2oz is more soothing. but since he''s not too big we don''t worry for now.

re: rice cereal and constipation, forgot to post on this, we have been giving J 1.5 tblsp''s of rice cereal at night in his bottle and he hasn''t been constipated at all but he is also mostly still on BM too...which has so much water. so not sure if a baby on formula could have more probs but seems like it... can you give them water too at that point then in a bottle? or like someone said, prunes.

oh and TG i agree re conditioned to know what to expect. our bedtime routine is solid and it''s always the same. the other night i was walking J into his room in his swaddle, he was totally peaceful and mellow in my arms. i walk in and he sees the lights are dim/low and the room is dark and i started rocking and sshing him and he immediately stiffens and started screaming. i told greg i felt like he was like HOLY CRAP ITS THAT SLEEP THING AGAIN!! he goes down within 5-15 min depending on the night, but i think he is def starting to realize (or his brain is even if HE doesnt realize it yet) what certain things mean.

re: self soothing, he can do it when he wants to, we have seen it in action. but sometimes he won''t have it. also...we don''t have him in his crib yet FT..i am paranoid about moving him because he does so well in his bassinet at night. and only sleeps 1 hour stretches in his crib for naps. but i know eventually we will have to move him to crib for nighttime. i am just worried that will mess with his night sleep.

 

[TravelingGal]

Oh, and Mara, what are you doing to soothe him? As I said, Amelia was already able to be soothed by herself when we put her down. So I didn''t care if she feel asleep or not for 30 minutes. The point was putting her down, which I did - I put her down and left. If she wasn''t crying or freaking out, it was a success. Sooner or later, they fall asleep.

Every few days, if she didn''t fight it, I put her down a little earlier. There''s no way I could tell you now WHEN she actually fell asleep (we only had a audio monitor, which I honestly think in hindsight was a godsend...a video monitor would probably have had me freaking out a bit more). If I heard no noise, I figured no drama.

Even now, she''s so used to being in her crib awake that she plays in there in the morning, which is great for me not having to go in when she wakes up early. I think this is really dependent on your kid''s personality, but I do think leaving her in there for a bit before we came in really helped. Again, she was so used to going down and being awake that for some reason, waking UP and being alone didn''t seem to bother her. Some kids aren''t like that though and scream bloody murder when they wake up.

 

[Dreamer_D]

We started training Hunter to sleep by himself and for long periods at 4 weeks. We did not use CIO until 9 months. Prior to that, we used to pick up, put down method in the baby whisperer, worked great, but it did take 1.5 hours the first time we used it. No nap for at least 1-2 hours before bedtime. Also swaddled and used a pacifier and white noise.

Now at 13 months when it is bed time, we put him in pajamas, give him a bottle of milk, and then its into the crib and walk out. No routine, nothing. Kid just puts himself to sleep within 20 minutes, he talks and sings and plays with his pacifiers (we give him four). It has been that way since he was about 4 months old, though at that time I nursed him prior to bed.

So the early ground work really pays off in the long term.

This is my 10000th post!

Thought I would save it for my mommy friends.

 

[Mara]

TG...his naps are typically around 1pm, 3pm, 5pm right now given that he gets up at around 10am or 11am. give or take 30 min one way or the other. he is only napping like 45min-1hour stretches about 3x a day. i can't get him to go longer at all right now, he totally wakes up regardless of the situation he's in. depending on if he got that 3rd nap in sometimes i will put him in his swing if he is fussy at about 6:30pm or 7pm so we can eat, and sometimes he 'catnaps' in there but only light sleep. we try to make sure he is 'up' for 7:30-8:30 since 8:30 is when we start his routine to have him hopefully down by 9:30 or 10. sometimes he goes down at 9:30 but more likely 10. so his last 'real nap' is usually about 3-4 hours from his bedtime. i KNOW he is tired even by 8pm, but he just fights it so hard.

ETA...congrats dreamer!!

re: soothing... it depends. sometimes i can tell from how he is acting and looking that i don't have to do much soothing for him. for naps i don't do much...i will swaddle him and rock him for just a minute or two til he is 'calm' but awake, turn on the sheep and put him down. sometimes he lays there and then falls asleep, sometimes he lays there and then slowly becomes more alert, fights it and eventually cries. then i go in and rinse and repeat the whole thing. typically 2nd or 3rd time he will drop off for ~45 min. these are naps.

for bedtime soothing, we swaddle, then go into dark room, and do the happy baby rocking and sshh'ing or sometimes i sing him a song. he goes through periods of drowsy, light sleep and then alert most times when we are holding him. if we put him down too soon he will usually wake himself up and cry within 15 min. then it's rinse and repeat, 2nd time usually works. for bedtimes we have not been able to just put him down drowsy alert and have him drop off. he will always fully wake and cry then.

also i said earlier but he knows how to self-soothe but it depends on his mood if it's successful. i try to gauge but not always successfully.

and waking up from naps or sleep... it also depends..sometimes he wakes up slowly, i can hear and see him in the monitor moving and making noise but he will drop off a few more times before coming fully alert and making weak cries. and other times it's up and crying full force.

 

[fieryred33143]

So I learned a valuable lesson just now. COPY before posting. Grr

lol

Ok here''s what I think I said:

Thanks ladies on the comments. I don''t think the anxiety is enough to see someone about it but I''ll be paying attention.

Anchor-Ditto on the conditioning. We don''t do song or a book because Sophia is easily distracted. She takes that time to let us know what she thinks about our song, including "clapping" at the end so that''s out. But her sound machine is her cue that it is bed time.

Mandy re: cereal-Sophia has never been constipated on cereal or oatmeal. I''m not sure why your pedi recommended that since the boys will be 6 months when they start. Cereal is really recommended for younger babies because the chances of allergies to fruits/veggies (fruits especially) is much greater when they are younger than 6 months. If you think they will be too constipated on either cereal or oatmeal, I would skip it all together.

****

In Sophia news, yesterday I put her in her crib with some toys while I folded her clothes. When I turned to check on her, she was trying really hard to pull up

. I don''t know why I''m rushing her to crawl/stand. She''s going to be a nightmare, I can feel it. But on the flip side, I''ll lose some weight in the process of chasing after her

She''s also found her voice...again. She screams for everything. During dinner on Saturday she spent a good 30 seconds screaming out of excitement and looking over to see if anyone was paying attention. This morning in the car she screamed almost the entire ride. But it''s not angry screams, it''s happy "Hello World" screams

 

[fieryred33143]

Date: 3/22/2010 1:05:44 PM
Author: dreamer_d

We started training Hunter to sleep by himself and for long periods at 4 weeks. We did not use CIO until 9 months. Prior to that, we used to pick up, put down method in the baby whisperer, worked great, but it did take 1.5 hours the first time we used it. No nap for at least 1-2 hours before bedtime. Also swaddled and used a pacifier and white noise.

Now at 13 months when it is bed time, we put him in pajamas, give him a bottle of milk, and then its into the crib and walk out. No routine, nothing. Kid just puts himself to sleep within 20 minutes, he talks and sings and plays with his pacifiers (we give him four). It has been that way since he was about 4 months old, though at that time I nursed him prior to bed.

So the early ground work really pays off in the long term.

This is my 10000th post!

Thought I would save it for my mommy friends.

We''re the lucky ones to have you DD! That''s for sure!

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 3/22/2010 12:59:45 PM
Author: Mara
ginger the fact that you said A won''t be satisfied til he eats a lot is what makes me wonder about the reflux or gas yanno, just because the sucking IS soothing to them. i can almost tell when J is hungry vs when he just doesn''t feel good and wants to be soothed. seriously i am like you do not need 7 oz of food kid...you are not that big!!! but he eats it and doesn''t spit it up and then feels ok ... but i tend to think the last 1oz or 2oz is more soothing. but since he''s not too big we don''t worry for now.

re: rice cereal and constipation, forgot to post on this, we have been giving J 1.5 tblsp''s of rice cereal at night in his bottle and he hasn''t been constipated at all but he is also mostly still on BM too...which has so much water. so not sure if a baby on formula could have more probs but seems like it... can you give them water too at that point then in a bottle? or like someone said, prunes.

oh and TG i agree re conditioned to know what to expect. our bedtime routine is solid and it''s always the same. the other night i was walking J into his room in his swaddle, he was totally peaceful and mellow in my arms. i walk in and he sees the lights are dim/low and the room is dark and i started rocking and sshing him and he immediately stiffens and started screaming. i told greg i felt like he was like HOLY CRAP ITS THAT SLEEP THING AGAIN!! he goes down within 5-15 min depending on the night, but i think he is def starting to realize (or his brain is even if HE doesnt realize it yet) what certain things mean.

re: self soothing, he can do it when he wants to, we have seen it in action. but sometimes he won''t have it. also...we don''t have him in his crib yet FT..i am paranoid about moving him because he does so well in his bassinet at night. and only sleeps 1 hour stretches in his crib for naps. but i know eventually we will have to move him to crib for nighttime. i am just worried that will mess with his night sleep.

Yeah, trust me...everything I did and thought of doing was paralyzing because I was so afraid of screwing up what we had "accomplished" thus far.

My two cents though, is sleep conditioning is easier when the kid is in the final usual sleep place - at least it was for US. This doesn''t mean that the crib move will be an issue. Amelia took to it without a peep. Loved her crib. You could possibly train J and THEN move him to the crib without a problem. But because at SOME point he will have to move there (since the bassinet will be too small), and if you have him totally trained and them move him and it''s an issue, you''ll be a bit more stuck if he doesn''t have a lot of time left to be in the bassinet. Either way, you''ll figure it out and he''ll be fine.

I also found that Amelia could sleep fine in the crib because she was still swaddled...I figure that helped her feel cozy in the big giant crib. Just for grins and giggles, here is her first trip to the crib. The info says the photo was taken on May 15, 2008. She was born on April 1, so this was just into the 6 week mark. I guess we were still using the hospital blankets then as well! (And yes, I know we have the ugliest, most uncozy crib for her. Talk about sterile and yucky!

)

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 3/22/2010 1:05:44 PM
Author: dreamer_d

We started training Hunter to sleep by himself and for long periods at 4 weeks. We did not use CIO until 9 months. Prior to that, we used to pick up, put down method in the baby whisperer, worked great, but it did take 1.5 hours the first time we used it. No nap for at least 1-2 hours before bedtime. Also swaddled and used a pacifier and white noise.

Now at 13 months when it is bed time, we put him in pajamas, give him a bottle of milk, and then its into the crib and walk out. No routine, nothing. Kid just puts himself to sleep within 20 minutes, he talks and sings and plays with his pacifiers (we give him four). It has been that way since he was about 4 months old, though at that time I nursed him prior to bed.

So the early ground work really pays off in the long term.

This is my 10000th post!

Thought I would save it for my mommy friends.

Dreamer, congrats! 10000 wonderful and wise posts and it''s great to have you here!

And yup, I agree. I have no real routine for Amelia now. Milk (which I am going to cut before bedtime in the the next few months for the sake of potty training), brush teeth, PJ''s and in bed. Sometimes I''ll hold her and sing for a bit, sometimes not. Last night it took her an hour to sleep though...she sang the entire time!

Are you happy her was a noisy sleeper and you were forced (I use that term loosely) to put him in his crib at 4 weeks? Hee!!

 

[Mara]

love the pic TG!! she looks so cute in there. and the mattress looks plush. we have a firmer one so he doesn''t make any type of dent in it. my MOM thinks he doesn''t love the crib because it''s too ''big'' and he likes cozier spaces. also the last few days i have put him in the crib with the new wedge we have he MOVES himself around now. i have found him sideways which of course pisses him off to no end.

we thought about starting to move him to the crib by putting him in there after his ''nighttime'' wake...which of course now is becoming ''morning'' wake. because typically he only gets like 2-4 hours of sleep after that feed. so it wouldn''t be as ''detrimental'' to our night sleep if he didn''t sleep the whole 2-4 hours whereas if we just move him to crib now at 10pm and he only sleeps 2 hours then that messes with our long stretch.

of course we are just THINKING all of this because like you said, it''s paralyzing to want to change anything or ruin something. even though tomorrow or the day after HE could decide ''hey i am over this, lets sleep 2 hour stretches'' anyway.