Wedding Pre-wedding gifts. Did you open them?

[CrownJewel]

A very generous friend of mine sent a bridal shower gift because she couldn''t go to the bridal shower. I opened the package because it was from one of my registry stores. I was so excited to get this gift but one of FI''s friends said that''s a big NO NO! Apparently "etiquette" states that we are not supposed to open our gifts until after the event. Well I told him that''s one rule which I think is really silly.

What did you do? Screw the rules or wait?

 

[Sabine]

Etiquette people, please correct me if I''m wrong, but I actually think you are supposed to open the gift when it was received, and send a thank you for it when you get it, even if it''s before the event, so that the sender isn''t wondering whether you actually got it or not.

 

[swimmer]

Wow, how did this friend move around his or her apartment with all those unopened boxes piling up before he or she got married?

You need to open it (and all the ones that will come) so that you and your FI can send a thank you immediately. Technically you aren''t supposed to use the gifts till you are married and some people think its a good way to be excited about after the wedding, getting your new stuff (if you were already living together etc).

Personally, I opened the gifts, wrote the TY and then used the flatware but little else. Our flatware mostly said Continental Airlines or was pinched from the university dining hall so we were in desperate need. I was however SUPER sure that we weren''t postponing or calling off the wedding (in which case anything not engraved must be returned with an explanatory note). But, I hope everyone feels that their wedding is going to happen... Besides that, I cannot imagine tackling ALL the TY notes the day after the wedding. "Sorry honey, gotta thank Aunt Edna first..."

So, this is a vote for open that puppy and send a TY within minutes of doing so.

 

[CrownJewel]

Yay I did something right!

Thanks ladies. I did indeed send a thank you note within the week. I was so caught off guard to receive this gift so early, that I didn''t even make my "wedding thank you cards" yet! So I used a pretty letterpressed thank you card from my regular stash. Actually, I wish the card I sent her wasn''t so expensive, because they would be perfect as "wedding thank you cards."

I boxed the gift back up and stored it away, so no one else could call me out for opening my gift, pre-event.

 

[doodle]

the logic of your FI''s friend doesn''t even make sense--i mean, how much fun would a bridal shower be if the guests never got to see you open the gift they brought you?! i think the tradition is that you''re not supposed to USE the item prior to the wedding, but as far as opening it, everyone else is right--you pop that puppy open, then you send a thank you note! you absolutely did the right thing!

 

[Haven]

Open those gifts, and send a prompt TY note.

I had a friend who refused to open anything before the actual wedding, that is, until she started receiving anxious phone calls from family friends who were calling to make sure their gifts weren''t lost in the mail. Then she realized how important it is to open and reply with a TY as soon as possible.

 

[Independent Gal]

Quintitto.

 

[neatfreak]

Open it and write the note right away. That is fine. BUT you need to remember that if by chance something were to happen prior to the wedding, you should return the gift. So while it''s fine to open it, you would want to avoid spending any cash, etc.

 

[sumbride]

Date: 5/29/2008 1:50:03 PM
Author: neatfreak
Open it and write the note right away. That is fine. BUT you need to remember that if by chance something were to happen prior to the wedding, you should return the gift. So while it''s fine to open it, you would want to avoid spending any cash, etc.

Exactly. Don''t spend the cash, but it IS ok to cash the checks because you don''t want to hold onto them. Just be aware that you may have to refund the money if something happens.

 

[Bia]

I heard somewhere that its bad luck or something...or maybe it was etiquette...shows how good my memory is.

In any case, if it makes you feel any better, when I get something in the mail, there is nothing that will keep me from opening it. I am just too damn impatient! That will probably go for wedding presents. I mean, they''re for me afterall, right?

 

[Laurie2]

I''m a teacher I got several gifts from coworkers. I opened them because I wanted to be able to give them a thank you card before school was out for the summer.