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Phoenix, Proposal, holidays, family, accelerated timeline


Dec 11, 2014
1st post here, looking for some guidance, advice, help, and polishing of ideas.

SO here's my situation:
- My g/f moved into my my house in August and is renting out her own condo. One of the conditions of moving in was that I had a 1-year count down. If we are not engaged after 1 year of living together, time to move on to greener pastures...totally understandable.
- So I went home w/ my girl to her family for Thanksgiving. Her parents are divorced, so spent some days with mom, some days with dad.
- Before heading home after the weekend, her mother ended up giving us her old, unused wedding ring and engagement ring. It is a family heirloom from some grandma on her (divorced) dad's side..WHOA, big pressure now. (PS, we aren't superstitious, so no need to worry about a 'used' ring)
- The ring is an older style, too small. It needs to be resized and we both would want to put it in a different setting.
- Both of our parents and family (including grandmas) are coming out to Phoenix for the Xmas season.
- My girl and I have talked about this a lot and we are totally both on the same page as far as marriage and building a future together.

OK, phew, a lot of backstory. So here's where I'm torn. I'd like to propose after getting the ring reset and sized, at some point in the future. We both know about the ring and we both know about what kind of ring she wants. However, I've got the ring now, we are both on the same page, and all our families are coming together for the holiday. I am thinking it would be quite odd to say that we have a ring and are getting it customized but I have not officially proposed yet. Also, I am thinking that since our families will both be here, we should just stop dragging our feet and announce to everyone our future plans.

So what do yall think? Wait until after the holidays and after I can get the ring reset and customized? Or do it now(ish), use a ring that doesn't fit, but the symbolism and intention is there? Is it cheesy to do it around family time? What about greeting both our families w/ this announcement vs waiting until later in time when I can plan a really cool proposal?

I'll follow up w/ a later post on ideas I've got for here in Phoenix.


Aug 29, 2014
Re: Phoenix, Proposal, holidays, family, accelerated timelin

Hmm, I am torn for you on this one. On one hand, I feel like it's better to do it sooner so you can enjoy the holidays with your families as newly engaged, but I'm sure she would love to have the ring. Tbh, since it sounds like she is already involved, I would lean towards the former - just propose, and then you can go together and get the ring set/sized. So she won't have a ring for the holidays, but would have it soon after.


Jun 8, 2008
Re: Phoenix, Proposal, holidays, family, accelerated timelin

Which idea do you think your gf would prefer? Personally I say propose now and use the ring as it is now to do so and then after the holidays (when everything is less hectic) get the ring resized and customized. That way you can enjoy the holidays with family as an engaged couple. No reason you cannot make the proposal special and cool now even without the final ring. Good luck with whatever you decide.
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