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OMG a naked dude just tried to get into my house

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Kay

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I am working from home today and was trying to stay awake while reviewing corporate tax returns. Someone tried to pull open my front door a few times and then rang the bell several times. I thought it might be my husband if he had his hands full and couldn’t get to his keys easily. I opened the little wood door that covers the small window in our front door. I didn’t see anyone standing in front of the door, so I looked to the side, and there was a naked guy sitting on the bench next to my front door. It’s kind of a shock to look out your front door and see a penis sitting there! I could only see him from mid abdomen to knee.


I called 911 on my cordless phone, while running around checking the back door lock and closing curtains. (I also called DH from my cell while on hold with 911, because he works 5 minutes away.) The 911 operator asked me to describe the guy and I said he was white. She asked if I knew how tall he was or if I recognized him. I explained my limited view. (I restrained myself from saying the only measurement I saw was approximately 4-5”, and no, I did not recognize that penis!)


I heard the sirens after about 5 minutes, so I walked out front and saw 2 police cars and 4 officers had converged next door. They were standing over the naked guy who was sitting on the lawn next door. Then a guy comes out of that house in a towel and tells the officers the naked guy is his roommate. By then, DH arrived, so we just waited for the officers to come over. Apparently naked guy took something he shouldn’t have and went a little wacko. The house next to ours is a rental, and we have had a whole series of loser neighbors in the 7 years I have lived here. We keep wishing the owners would sell the house to someone who would live there and fix it up, but it is unlikely they would sell in a down market since they held it through several good years.

So now I am wide awake, but having difficulty focusing on tax returns.
 

JulieN

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amusing. (:

all''s well...that ends well.
 

decodelighted

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WOW!!!! I''m glad you had your door locked!!!
 

Elmorton

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OMG - what a freaking lovely afternoon! I'm glad nothing more happened - who knows what a user on a bad trip could have done other than sitting on your porch and scaring the heck out of you. Do you know if your neighbor is spending the night at home or downtown?

As a follow up, maybe you should call the landlord to complain, even if it is one of those crazy corporations. This kind of behavior (well, definitely the drug use) is probably in violation of the lease, and if the landlord continues to get complaint calls, he or she is probably a lot more likely to want to sell the property instead of keep it up with lousy tenants.
 

purrfectpear

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As they say on the internet,

"This thread is worthless without pictures"
9.gif
 

mela lu

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hahah purfectpear! funny.

OMG though!

Terrible neighbor. What a Di@k!
9.gif


Glad you are okay
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packrat

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Oh heavens! I''m glad he was too whacked out of his gourd to do anything other than sit there and show you his wares!
 

somethingshiny

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Date: 3/30/2009 6:04:56 PM
Author: purrfectpear
As they say on the internet,


''This thread is worthless without pictures''
9.gif

\
tee hee!

I''m sure it was frightening though. How weird!!
 

Kay

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Date: 3/30/2009 6:04:56 PM
Author: purrfectpear
As they say on the internet,

''This thread is worthless without pictures''
9.gif
ROFL! Had I known it was only a stoned neighbor, I might have grabbed my camera for "evidence."
2.gif
 

Kay

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Date: 3/30/2009 6:02:57 PM
Author: Elmorton
OMG - what a freaking lovely afternoon! I''m glad nothing more happened - who knows what a user on a bad trip could have done other than sitting on your porch and scaring the heck out of you. Do you know if your neighbor is spending the night at home or downtown?

As a follow up, maybe you should call the landlord to complain, even if it is one of those crazy corporations. This kind of behavior (well, definitely the drug use) is probably in violation of the lease, and if the landlord continues to get complaint calls, he or she is probably a lot more likely to want to sell the property instead of keep it up with lousy tenants.
Yes, between tax returns and my "visitor" it has been a freaking lovely afternoon. I did not even think to ask the officers if they were taking him away. Once I found out who it was, I felt awkward about having called the police. I''ve actually never met those tenants before. I hope they do not retaliate. It is a single family home, not an apartment, so I am not sure how to contact the owner.
 

Skippy123

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Date: 3/30/2009 6:32:42 PM
Author: somethingshiny

Date: 3/30/2009 6:04:56 PM
Author: purrfectpear
As they say on the internet,


''This thread is worthless without pictures''
9.gif


tee hee!

I''m sure it was frightening though. How weird!!
hehe. Oh gosh, I am so sorry, how freaky though!
 

OUpearlgirl

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We had a drunk man sneak into our sorority house one day! He was standing in the kitchen, going through the cupboards. He was high as a kite and had no idea where he was or that he was even naked.

You wouldn''t believe all of the squeals that got!
 

Kay

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Date: 3/30/2009 6:44:47 PM
Author: OUpeargirl
We had a drunk man sneak into our sorority house one day! He was standing in the kitchen, going through the cupboards. He was high as a kite and had no idea where he was or that he was even naked.

You wouldn''t believe all of the squeals that got!
I bet there were a lot of squeals. I have no idea if this guy thought it was amusing to visit the neighbors while naked, or if he was just disoriented and lost. DH and I had a good laugh when we found out who it was, but it creeped me out to see him sitting there. I was just glad by little girl was at day care so I oculd work.

Man, now we have to hose down the front porch to get rid of naked guy cooties!
 

Ellen

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TOO funny. Now, of course!
9.gif
 

fleur-de-lis

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Wow, Kay! I would have been scared out of my wits. I''ve had drunken "let me in!" knockers at 2am before, but they''ve never been naked.

Date: 3/30/2009 6:42:47 PM
Author: Kay
Date: 3/30/2009 6:02:57 PM

Author: Elmorton

OMG - what a freaking lovely afternoon! I''m glad nothing more happened - who knows what a user on a bad trip could have done other than sitting on your porch and scaring the heck out of you. Do you know if your neighbor is spending the night at home or downtown?


As a follow up, maybe you should call the landlord to complain, even if it is one of those crazy corporations. This kind of behavior (well, definitely the drug use) is probably in violation of the lease, and if the landlord continues to get complaint calls, he or she is probably a lot more likely to want to sell the property instead of keep it up with lousy tenants.

Yes, between tax returns and my ''visitor'' it has been a freaking lovely afternoon. I did not even think to ask the officers if they were taking him away. Once I found out who it was, I felt awkward about having called the police. I''ve actually never met those tenants before. I hope they do not retaliate. It is a single family home, not an apartment, so I am not sure how to contact the owner.

County Hall of Records. Taking a quick look at your past posts for context clues, you''ve mentioned SD jewelers in the past, so if that''s still valid this should get you started:
County Hall of Records If the property is held by a CA corporation, the Secretary of State for CA would have registered address and agent info. Hope this helps!
 

Elmorton

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Yupp - it probably depends on your county, but around here, our property records are all on the internet and you can find the name of who owns a house if you know the address.
 

HollyS

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This story reminds me of when my grandmother came home and found a naked guy getting ready to shower in her bathroom!

She was frightened, but still pretty spunky. She yelled at him and he ran out the door, then she called the cops. They picked him up down the street; he was strung out on something.

Glad to hear you''re okay, just a bit freaked. Also, good to know you didn''t recognize those 4 inches!
28.gif
 

Mara

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lol Kay I am imagining you telling the owner.... ''hello i just want to be sure you aren''t upset with me calling to report your naked tenant to the police as an intruder?''.... can you imagine being the owner going WTF?!?!
 

monarch64

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Hasn''t this been the most "monday-ish" of Mondays? My co-workers and I were remarking on how freaky today has been. This has to be the topper, though. I do not envy anyone who looks outside to find a penis on their porch.
9.gif
 

PilsnPinkysMom

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Goodness!

Glad you are OK... Even if it was harmless in the end, that stuff can be spooky. Unidentifiable naked men. Eek.

Here''s to hoping you can find out who the landlord is! I can''t imagine he''d want to keep them as tenants. I''m certain during the leasing process they signed a contract indicating no illegal behavior (drugs, etc) would be taking place on the premises, so perhaps they won''t be your neighbors for much longer?
 

fieryred33143

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Kay

First off I''m glad you came out ok.

That said, this story was hilarious!!!

LMAO @ "I restrained myself from saying the only measurement I saw was approximately 4-5”, and no, I did not recognize that penis!"
 

Irishgrrrl

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OMG, my husband probably thinks I''m insane! I''m sitting here on the couch laughing my butt off! Kay, I''m sorry you had such an unpleasant surprise this afternoon . . . but imagine how MORTIFIED this guy will probably be every time he sees you from now on! LOL!
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April20

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Wow. So that doesn''t happen every day. I would have totally freaked out and then been ticked I didn''t take pics later.

I''m glad everything worked out and I hope dude locks himself in his own residence before taking things he shouldn''t...
 

Tacori E-ring

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Scary and SO strange!
 

DivaDiamond007

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OMG! I''m glad that you had your doors locked and that you''re okay! What a total weirdo. I would have freaked out and done the same thing.

The neighbor told my MIL that some strange guy wandered into his house the other day looking for "George". George is the neighbor two houses down
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We usually lock our doors but make a point to now.
 

canuk-gal

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HI:

Yikes! What a nutcase!
11.gif


cheers--Sharon
 

icekid

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Yikes, Kay..! Don''t feel badly, I would have done the exact same thing.
 

LaurenThePartier

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He was a little early for April Fool''s Day.
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doodle

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Oh wow. And I thought my neighbors were nuts, but hey, at least I haven''t actually seen their--wait, nevermind. In poor taste.
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Maisie

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Date: 3/30/2009 7:18:12 PM
Author: fleur-de-lis
Wow, Kay! I would have been scared out of my wits. I''ve had drunken ''let me in!'' knockers at 2am before, but they''ve never been naked.
This made me laugh!!! Where I come from ''knockers'' is a slang word for boobies!
 
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