My new anniversary band outshines my original set :/

[MoreCaratsThanaSalad]

Hello! I'm newish. My husband bought me . . . (okay, me, I bought it for myself because when you've been married awhile I spend all the money anyway haha!) a semi-eternity anniversary band to celebrate our ten years. Problem: It way out-blings my original band and e-ring together.

I've always really loved my original set.I thought I was fancy stuff for having it. I mean, it's not huge, but it's high quality and always made me feel good. I thought this new band would take me to higher heights but in reality, it's kind of garish. I was reading some things on here that you fine folks have written that the sting of new bling will wear off and eventually I'll think it's shrinking or something, but I don't think so. My problem is really with the comparison of the two and I can't see that perception changing unless I just get used to it.

My husband suggested wearing it on the other hand, but imo, that defeats the whole purpose of a) enhancing my wedding set and b) being an anniversary band. I just don't want it on my right hand, you know?

Tell me what you think. I wish I could remember what my original ring is carat-wise. I know the center stone is 1.1, but I don't remember what the stats are on the setting and the original band. Supposedly the new one is 4 carats, 2-rows of 11 diamonds for a total of 22 diamonds.

Observe and tell me your thoughts.

 

[Tourmaline]

I agree with your husband. Wear it on the other hand.

 

[farrahlyn]

its GORGEOUS. and i have to agree, it totally overpowers your e-ring. i'd wear it as a RHR. If you're dead set on an anniversary ring to wear with your e-ring, i'd re-evaluate the style needed to complement your e-ring. when i was looking for an band for my e-ring (dh surprised me with a new ring on our 15th anniversary) I was set on a 5 or 7 stone ring but it just looked terrible with my ring. i settled on a double row pave band that complements the ring. but that 5 or 7 stone ring i wanted? i'm dropping hints BIG TIME as an anniversary gift to wear as a RHR.

 

[rubybeth]

I don't think you're in love with it (describing it as "garish" seems pretty negative), so I'd see about returning and finding something else that will either work better with your set without overpowering it, or that you feel better about wearing on your right hand.

A narrower stacking band like one from CvB/LAD could be lovely with your original set without overpowering: http://www.loveaffairdiamonds.com/wedding-bands/ or one of Erika Winters bands: http://www.erikawinters.com/Wedding-Bands-collection.html

I very specifically got an anniversary band (a 5 stone ring, something like 1.1 ctw) to be worn on my right hand, since it would completely overpower my 1/2 carat solitaire engagement ring. It's not like there's a tradition of having to wear an anniversary band with your original set like there is with wearing engagement ring and wedding band stacked--you can do whatever you like.

 

[Ally66]

I agree, too. That is gorgeous and substantial as a stand-alone ring, right or left hand, if you think you'd wear it on the left by itself sometimes. Nice to have options?

 

[ame]

Definitely not with your wedding set. IMO? Either in place of, on the other hand, or return it and get another band that matches your set in width and is colored stones.

 

[YadaYadaYada]

Wow, pretty band but it does overpower your engagement ring. I would wear it alone or in your right hand, that way you can change it up so it will give you another option.

 

[telephone89]

I'd wear it either in place OF your wedding set or on the other hand.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I agree, that is not a band to wear with a wedding set. It is a standalone ring. If you want to add a band to your current set, it needs to be a single row of diamonds.

 

[pearaffair]

That is the prettiest band ever! How about a pic of it all by itself? Happy anniversary!!!

 

[MoreCaratsThanaSalad]

Update! It's growing on me. My normal, daily thing is my e-ring and the thin wedding band on my wedding finger, then the blue ring on my middle finger. So, I guess my e-ring has been overpowered for quite some time. Now that I added the blue back in with the anniversary band all on one hand, I don't think it's quite as "much". Right?

Maybe who cares if it's too out-there anyway.

 

[MoreCaratsThanaSalad]

Thank you!! Too bad it's night now, or I'd snap one. I need to go read that "how to photograph your diamonds" thread haha

 

[rubybeth]

Hey, if you love it, that's what matters! I love the blue ring!

Edited to add: just make sure the prongs on the new ring aren't scratching your lovely wedding set. Sometimes those exposed girdles of larger stones can really mess up your other rings.

 

[MoreCaratsThanaSalad]

Hey, if you love it, that's what matters! I love the blue ring!

Edited to add: just make sure the prongs on the new ring aren't scratching your lovely wedding set. Sometimes those exposed girdles of larger stones can really mess up your other rings.

That's a great point. I'm already worried about that. Hm. I take it you guys don't have a solution for that, right? Is there such a thing as ring spacers? There should be. Get on that, Science.

 

[lambskin]

I'd wear it either in place OF your wedding set or on the other hand.

Ditto.

 

[rubybeth]

Hey, if you love it, that's what matters! I love the blue ring!

Edited to add: just make sure the prongs on the new ring aren't scratching your lovely wedding set. Sometimes those exposed girdles of larger stones can really mess up your other rings.

That's a great point. I'm already worried about that. Hm. I take it you guys don't have a solution for that, right? Is there such a thing as ring spacers? There should be. Get on that, Science.

Absolutely! Spacers are absolutely a thing--a lot of PSers have them. You can find 1mm or 1.5mm bands in any type of material (silver, white gold, rose gold, platinum, palladium, etc.) on Etsy for just this reason. Shared prong bands are notorious for eating into the rings that sit next to them, with the small amount of rubbing/friction that occurs all day, every day. I once made the mistake of wearing a steel band next to my white gold engagement ring--bad idea (thankfully Whiteflash fixed my engagement ring for free when they resized it, but I felt terrible about it!).

Some people like using rose gold for spacers since they visually blend with skin tone and kind of "disappear" between two platinum or white gold rings. Other people prefer a match for their set.

Here's an older thread about where some PSers have purchased them: [URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/how-many-of-you-have-the-1mm-spacer-from-etsy.164445/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/how-many-of-you-have-the-1mm-spacer-from-etsy.164445/[/URL]

 

[MoreCaratsThanaSalad]

Hey, if you love it, that's what matters! I love the blue ring!

Edited to add: just make sure the prongs on the new ring aren't scratching your lovely wedding set. Sometimes those exposed girdles of larger stones can really mess up your other rings.

That's a great point. I'm already worried about that. Hm. I take it you guys don't have a solution for that, right? Is there such a thing as ring spacers? There should be. Get on that, Science.

Absolutely! Spacers are absolutely a thing--a lot of PSers have them. You can find 1mm or 1.5mm bands in any type of material (silver, white gold, rose gold, platinum, palladium, etc.) on Etsy for just this reason. Shared prong bands are notorious for eating into the rings that sit next to them, with the small amount of rubbing/friction that occurs all day, every day. I once made the mistake of wearing a steel band next to my white gold engagement ring--bad idea (thankfully Whiteflash fixed my engagement ring for free when they resized it, but I felt terrible about it!).

Some people like using rose gold for spacers since they visually blend with skin tone and kind of "disappear" between two platinum or white gold rings. Other people prefer a match for their set.

Here's an older thread about where some PSers have purchased them: [URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/how-many-of-you-have-the-1mm-spacer-from-etsy.164445/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/how-many-of-you-have-the-1mm-spacer-from-etsy.164445/[/URL]

Brilliant!!! Thanks!! Rose gold bands by the dozen! lol

 

[MoreCaratsThanaSalad]

Sorry to obsess but . . . should I upgrade the e-ring diamond? I have a sentimental attachment to the setting but I already changed out the diamond once. The first one was the same size, just a lower grade color.

Then again I could always sell the diamond, get a whole new e-ring and keep the setting in the my jewelry box for when one of my daughters gets married. Surely out of the three of them, one future son-in-law would appreciate the free setting lol

What do you think? The consensus here seems to be the anniversary band has to be a stand-alone, but I really love it now. It was just a little shocking at first and I was annoyed/sad about my e-ring by comparison.

Real question: what size diamond would I need to get for it to look right? My ring size is 6.5, my current e-ring center stone is 1.1 ct and the band is 4 carats spread over 22 diamonds.

THANKS!

PS - I love this board. You guys are awesome.

 

[partgypsy]

Update! It's growing on me. My normal, daily thing is my e-ring and the thin wedding band on my wedding finger, then the blue ring on my middle finger. So, I guess my e-ring has been overpowered for quite some time. Now that I added the blue back in with the anniversary band all on one hand, I don't think it's quite as "much". Right?

Maybe who cares if it's too out-there anyway.

All your rings are beautiful but I don't think they "go" together on one hand. Especially the wedding/erring with small melee with your new ring. As you have already noticed, the new ring overpowers the old rings. The only way I could maybe see it working is setting your main diamond In a plain metal setting, and stacking that with the new ring.

No comment on upgrading engagement ring. That's between you and your husband.

 

[rubybeth]

I still think you could try wearing them on different fingers. There are really no "rules" for how to wear anniversary rings, so you could wear that on your right hand, or you could try moving your wedding set to your right hand (or mix it up depending on the day) . If you love your set and your anniversary bands, just wear them separately! They won't 'compete' as much on different fingers, and less likely to experience damage that way, too.

Sometimes I leave my engagement ring at home and stack my 5 stone anniversary band with my wedding band and other stacking rings, and wear a colored stone halo on my right hand.

 

[Queenie60]

The blue ring should be worn separately on your other hand. As for the new ring, maybe you can wear that as a wedding band on the days when you don't feel like wearing your actual engagement ring/ wedding set. All of them together on one hand just doesn't look right in my opinion. When I travel or just want to be "low key" I wear a very nice 5 stone ring on my left hand in place of my wedding ring. It's nice to change on occasion. But, whatever you like to wear is what you should stick with - you're the one enjoying it.

 

[hoofbeats95]

I'd wear the blue ring on the other hand. Does it not rub against your wedding set? I think it really overpowers your wedding set and belongs on a separate hand.

For the new ring, I'd wear it solo on the right hand or solo in place of your wedding set. I've not even been married 5 years and I often wear a 5 stone band in place of my wedding set. It's easier to wear than my wedding set in some ways and I like the simple look most days. I think this new ring would really rock when worn separately.