My daughter is not in her senior yearbook!!!!! :-(

[lyra]

I would like everyone in the yearbook staff to personally write her a letter of apology. Just for starters, so they understand the gravity of the situation. It won't help anything, but everyone should learn the consequences of not having high standards. That is, if it can be definitively proven that it was the school that made the error and not the yearbook company. This is such a hard one. On the other hand, yearbooks are tossed aside once they serve their initial purpose. In the grand scheme, it won't be a major issue. She IS deserving of an apology from everyone concerned though, IMO.

 

[valeria101]

While graduation was in June, her school yearbooks are not received until Sept. Everyone has scattered to the winds by now.

This should make things easier.

If anyone still has the necessary files for the yearbook, perhaps you can organize a bootleg reprint for your daughter, for the school powers-that-be to autograph with a nice wish ? I am affraid it might take this much doing ...

Just a thought.

 

[sonnyjane]

I was Editor-in-Chief for our HS yearbook 3 of the 4 years I was there. It's still not clear to me whether you're saying this was deliberate or an accident?

We did have a faculty advisor, but to be honest, they were kind of just there to make sure that deadlines were being met and that nothing obscene went into the book. I feel like it would be easy for this to be a mistake, especially with a class of nearly 200 (our entire school only had 200), but the way you've written it makes me think you believe it was intentional?

Regarding Josten's, if it wasn't printed, it's pretty safe to assume that it wasn't submitted. They basically are just printing the files submitted. Back when I was working, we still cropped physical photographs by hand. Nowadays everything is digital and you submit the layouts in "ready-to-print" digital format. Josten's wouldn't be able to remove just one person without messing up entire spreads of pages.

I would 100% be upset with the school. Seems like their response is not only unsympathetic but pretty much dismissive.

 

[VRBeauty]

As another former YB staffer, it seems to me that the question is whether the school administration or the yearbook staff screwed up. The school might have given the staff a student list that for some reason did not include your daughter's name. BUT had that happened, the staff would have ended up with (at least) a photo without a name, which they should have investigated.

Do you know whether any other kids were left out?

 

[Lisa Loves Shiny]

This actually happened to me in HS so I feel for your daughter. I don't know how she will feel about it later in life but if she is like me it won't devastate her. Honestly- it just isn't something you think about after you graduate and move on with your life.

 

[PintoBean]

While graduation was in June, her school yearbooks are not received until Sept. Everyone has scattered to the winds by now. All I got from the school was they will reimburse the cost of her book and an excuse that "the yearbook is made by the students for the students" they take no responsibility. I know this to be CRAP as I was in yearbook and we had students and teachers check it and went over the proof before it was printed to assure all were included.
I have also asked to be reimbursed for the graduation photo that we paid to have made for that wasn't used at all. No answer back yet.
In this day and age of technology I don't see how this happens, 180 students means 180 photos and names, not 179 but oh well let's print anyway.
I told them I am not the one who they owe an apology but that my daughter deserves a formal apology.

I am still beyond upset and so is she

This is so strange - delivering the books after graduation. How can they sign each other's books? Perhaps this is deliberate so that when errors, like your daughter being omitted, arise, they hope that everyone has moved on and doesn't care anymore. SMH... this school, ugh...

 

[sonnyjane]

This is so strange - delivering the books after graduation. How can they sign each other's books? Perhaps this is deliberate so that when errors, like your daughter being omitted, arise, they hope that everyone has moved on and doesn't care anymore. SMH... this school, ugh...

I agree, that part is weird! Our books were delivered the week of graduation (a few days before). We had a "spring supplement" that covered the spring sports that didn't finish in time for the deadline and that got mailed out separately and had a sticky thing so you could insert it in the book, but again that's back before things were digital so processing took a long time. very weird to me. Seems like a definite afterthought.

 

[kenny]

SMH... this school, ugh...

What does SMH mean?

 

[sonnyjane]

What does SMH mean?

Shaking my head

 

[PintoBean]

What does SMH mean?

Sexy man... HEY!!'

Shaking my head

 

[lambskin]

I would demand a recall and a reprint at school expense. Yearbook students are (or should be) supervised by a faculty member and the school has the ultimate responsibility. Schools are very concerned about "inclusion" and failure to comply can be troublesome for the school. I would also demand that this incident be reported in each and every yearbook student's record/transcript as future colleges need to know what kind of student they may be admitting. Also, I would demand that any member of the yearbook be immediately removed from the yearbook and any school newspaper position. Finally I would demand that a policy be implemented to prevent exclusion for future students. My heart breaks for her and your family. Thank God she has limited time left in this toxic environment.

 

[sonnyjane]

I would also demand that this incident be reported in each and every yearbook student's record/transcript as future colleges need to know what kind of student they may be admitting. Also, I would demand that any member of the yearbook be immediately removed from the yearbook and any school newspaper position. Finally I would demand that a policy be implemented to prevent exclusion for future students. My heart breaks for her and your family. Thank God she has limited time left in this toxic environment.

I would certainly get proof that this was intentional and not a mistake before I took that kind of action

 

[lambskin]

The failure to include her senior photo spoke volumes. If the student was not involved in any activities which a picture would be taken that is understandable. Even being excluded from candids can be explained away (there were none taken or submitted) but the senior photo? Obviously the poster and her daughter know the daughter's peer experience at school and how this would reflect the glaring omission of the her photo.

 

[monarch64]

Whoa. A mistake on the part of a MINOR would be grounds for smearing their record/name to any college to which they apply???
K. I will advise my child not to get involved with Yearbook. Good grief. There is weight to the OP situation, but seriously? Going a bit overboard here with things, methinks, Lambskin.

 

[Asscherhalo_lover]

Big time overboard. Most likely it was a mistake, they happen. My good friend from high school wasn't in the yearbook, at all. I took a picture of him giving the school the middle finger and we all taped it into our books. Done.

 

[monarch64]

I would demand a recall and a reprint at school expense. Yearbook students are (or should be) supervised by a faculty member and the school has the ultimate responsibility. Schools are very concerned about "inclusion" and failure to comply can be troublesome for the school. I would also demand that this incident be reported in each and every yearbook student's record/transcript as future colleges need to know what kind of student they may be admitting. Also, I would demand that any member of the yearbook be immediately removed from the yearbook and any school newspaper position. Finally I would demand that a policy be implemented to prevent exclusion for future students. My heart breaks for her and your family. Thank God she has limited time left in this toxic environment.

If a faculty member was supervising the process, shouldn't he or she be held accountable? This would be a student's first experience with documenting/archiving, and it is part of one's education, not their JOB. So why on earth you'd say the students on the yearbook "staff" should be held accountable is beyond me. Please explain further how your suggested punishment fits the alleged "crime" here. Please.

 

[monarch64]

Autumngems, I am very sorry to hear that your daughter was left out of her yearbook. It is an awful thing she's having to deal with and i wouldn't wish that sort of crap on anyone. Major problem! I googled quickly "i was left out of my yearbook" and found several instances of this happening. One of the families asked for a sticky insert, a revised copy for the student printed at no expense, premier seating at graduation ceremony, and a special mention of student omitted during graduation. I think those terms suffice, but obviously it's up to the student and family. What do you think? What will you and your daughter ask for?

 

[Rhea]

Lambskin, I think that's a bit harsh. It's also impossible on many levels. She's already out of the "toxic environment". Autumngems daughter graduated high school in June. It's fair to assume that a percentage of the yearbook staff did as well and therefore they've already started college seeing as how it's now mid-September. Smearing their names for what may be an accident would be unfair. I don't know their system for checking but I can imagine something like that happening and I know I wouldn't want any minor to have a high school mistake following them into their 20's.

 

[Rhea]

What I don't understand is why are the yearbooks just not being handed out? We had ours to sign on the last day of classes. Maybe kids don't sign physical yearbooks any more. I think that's the last time I saw it, the day it was handed out and we all signed them. That was nearly 20 years ago. I'm assuming my parents have it stored somewhere.

I do feel sorry for you daughter, Autumngems, how terrible to be left out of such a thing. I'm guessing in a few years, or even months, it won't feel nearly as important as it does now, but that doesn't help at the moment. If it were me I'd request a sticky to be added in addition to the refund for the yearbook cost and an apology.

 

[cmd2014]

You know, as tough as this is, bad things happen in life, and maybe a more helpful approach would be to help her accept it and move on, rather than going to war about something that 10 years from now won't really matter. Learning how to weather life's ups and downs and disappointments is what builds resiliency - and given that she graduated unexpectedly at the last minute IIRC, maybe that's why she didn't make it into the yearbook.

I hope that she is able to say "well, that sucks" and feel sad about it for a day or two, and then move on to her bright future life. Where she will keep in touch with those people she wants to from high school (which, honestly, may be no-one - how many of us can say that we are still in touch with high school friends other than those who have 'friended' us on Facebook?), and not think too much about those she doesn't.

 

[lambskin]

What if the omission was not a "mistake"? What if it was made on the basis of bullying, gender, race, sexual orientation, disability or other discriminatory reasons? By simply letting this go without consequences it basically affirms the practice for future yearbook staff.

 

[MollyMalone]

What if the omission was not a "mistake"? What if it was made on the basis of bullying, gender, race, sexual orientation, disability or other discriminatory reasons? By simply letting this go without consequences it basically affirms the practice for future yearbook staff.

I said this on Saturday
https://www.pricescope.com/communit...t-in-her-senior-yearbook.234271/#post-4217005
but your post leads me to think its bottom line bears repeating: none of us has any reason to think that the omission was a purposeful act.

 

[anne_h]

Agreed, we don't know what happened, if this was intentional or not. Either way, I totally understand why your daughter would be upset.

At the same time, I'll agree with another poster that the yearbook is old news in one's life very quickly. I know your daughter is in pain now, but within the next year or two she will very likely have moved on.

 

[autumngems]

I know back when I was in school we always got the yearbook in plenty of time for others to be able to sign it, that's not the case anymore, it's ridiculous to get it after graduation when everyone is gone but oh well.
I DO NOT know if it was intentional. I cannot get the school to tell me if my daughter's picture and info was submitted at all and Josten's is the same, they won't answer that question.
I finally heard from school POC for yearbook and they are sending me a check for the cost of yearbook and having Josten's make about 30 stickers for her and her friends yearbooks with picture name and quote. Although most are gone to college elsewhere so that is kind of blehhh in my opinion.
I did ask in my email if other's were left out and if my daughter's info was submitted but they ignored those questions. When I go to the school to get the stickers I will be asking them face to face.
My daughter has had some issues in school but I don't know if those personnel were in yearbook.
Josten's said they cannot print just one book, I asked

 

[ame]

I know back when I was in school we always got the yearbook in plenty of time for others to be able to sign it, that's not the case anymore, it's ridiculous to get it after graduation when everyone is gone but oh well.
I DO NOT know if it was intentional. I cannot get the school to tell me if my daughter's picture and info was submitted at all and Josten's is the same, they won't answer that question.
I finally heard from school POC for yearbook and they are sending me a check for the cost of yearbook and having Josten's make about 30 stickers for her and her friends yearbooks with picture name and quote. Although most are gone to college elsewhere so that is kind of blehhh in my opinion.
I did ask in my email if other's were left out and if my daughter's info was submitted but they ignored those questions. When I go to the school to get the stickers I will be asking them face to face.
My daughter has had some issues in school but I don't know if those personnel were in yearbook.
Josten's said they cannot print just one book, I asked

Nope. Nope. NOPE. Not acceptable. Lawyer. Up.

I personally wouldn't give two hot steaming shits if it was deliberate or an accident. The school administration should be the ones signing off on the proof before this goes to press, not a student staffer or a teacher that just kind of hangs out in the class. Their oversight is not only hurtful to your child, but could cause an issue later if it she has to provide proof of attendance, or her attendance at the school is ever questioned. This could cause her job issues later in life, and that alone is something 30 stickers and a reimbursement check is not going to cover.

Their immediate fix should be to recall and reprint the ENTIRE run, at the school's cost, or the teacher's cost because they should've caught that. The facct that they're acting like it's no big deal tells me that it's deliberate and intentional with the intent to harm, which I feel you need to push harder and pursue as a systemic bullying issue on. It might be an overreaction, but it took me 20 years to be able to use a public bathroom after some of the things that were done to me by classmates and the fact that their parents just made "donations" to the school made sure they were never punished. This shit has to stop, and make it cost them money.

 

[AdaBeta27]

It seems bizarre to not even issue a yearbook until essentially the following year. I've never heard of that before. The book comes out before the school year finishes, because that's when it's important. And relevant. Who gives a rip about it the next year?? (And the school's lack of action until pushed is completely indicative of the fact that the administrators think it's all insignificant past history now.)

The school should also be reimbursing the cost of her senior pictures. After all, students must comply with the school's regulations and deadlines regarding graduation photos for submission to yearbook. Who is to say that this student would NOT have opted for entirely different photo choices had she not been fettered by the school's yearbook photo dictates.

I know I live in a small town, and here, people do still read the local newspapers. But had this yearbook admission occurred, my family would require the school to pay for a nice, big, Congratulations, Graduate ad, from (the school and an extensive list of relatives' names), with that nice, big, clear graduation photo that the high school yearbook omitted. And then people would see that, and wonder why she got a big photo ad published in the paper, and soon, the story would be known all over town. And you can bet that every parent in town will be following up with the school to ensure that their child does not ever get omitted from current and future yearbooks.

 

[elizabethess]

Nope. Nope. NOPE. Not acceptable. Lawyer. Up.
I personally wouldn't give two hot steaming shits if it was deliberate or an accident. The school administration should be the ones signing off on the proof before this goes to press, not a student staffer or a teacher that just kind of hangs out in the class. Their oversight is not only hurtful to your child, but could cause an issue later if it she has to provide proof of attendance, or her attendance at the school is ever questioned. This could cause her job issues later in life, and that alone is something 30 stickers and a reimbursement check is not going to cover.

100% do not want to minimize anyone's hurtful experience, nor imply that intentional omission isn't bad. I'm so sorry for anyone who went through difficult times. However, there is no reason that omission from a yearbook should cause ANY job issues later in life. Yearbooks, like class rings, are essentially vanity projects and are not proof of attendance of a school. Transcripts and diplomas are. Jobs, grad schools, etc. ... they want transcripts, and/or a copy of your diploma, not your yearbook.

Hopefully that offers a bit of reassurance.

 

[monarch64]

Ame, I never had to produce a yearbook or school photo to prove my attendance. I did, however, have to submit my high school transcripts once.

 

[sonnyjane]

Jiminy Cricket. Lawyer up? At what cost? For what crime? And corporations don't check YEARBOOKS to verify school attendance. I feel like I'm taking crazy pills here.

Yes it's an upsetting situation. I would push for the refund of the cost of the book (you did) and I would probably complain that I wanted reimbursed the cost of the photos if they were taken specifically for the purpose of putting in the yearbook, but that and a written apology from the school is where you kind of have to, for your own sanity, draw the line.

 

[lyra]

I have always tried to minimize over the top reactions for the benefit of my kids. In this situation I wouldn't want her to think it is a great huge life changing event. I'd want her to learn that stuff happens, and life does go on. You can't make everything right all the time. Life disappoints. My mom was very clinical, and I'm the same really, although I can also have big over the top reactions. I just try to talk myself down, and try not to let my reactions rub off on others if possible. Be calm and make it less instead of more of a problem, IMO.