MissStepcut|1314493622|3002604 said:I wanted to, and always imagined I would, but I am not sure I will be able to afford it anymore. We're planning a move to NYC and the upfront costs for an apartment are astronomical. I feel bad because obviously he spent a great deal on my diamond. Maybe I will find something special that's more in my price range than an expensive watch.
jlp86|1314493825|3002632 said:I do not have any ideas right now but I had a question. Do men usually receive engagement gifts from their SO? I didn't even think about this! Is this something I should be thinking of?
JaymeC|1314497135|3003069 said:I am hoping to get him a watch at approx $5000. I think that cufflinks won't be substantial enough. I think that this is a drop in the bucket because I am thinking my ring will be upwards of $15000. I have a good job and good income, almost as much as him, so why shouldn't I get him something. He knows that I am planning this, so I think I'll wait until he proposes as it could be a while yet, then get him his gift. I think that its strange that we expect this large of a gift from our SOs, but many don't get them anything. Especially since women are moe substantial income earners than in times past.
At one time I would have agreed with this post whole-heartedly, but I see more nuance now. For one thing, this gift "for me" serves a purpose for him too: if I wanted a smaller diamond, he would be vehemently opposed because of how it reflects on him. For another, my income isn't really determinative of how I spend my money now, which will soon be our money: that is more of a budgeting question. Finally, the bride's family traditionally foots the bill for the wedding, which makes the tradition of groom paying for the ring equitable, or in many cases, puts a bigger financial burden on the bride. If you compare the median ring cost and median wedding cost, a groom would be getting the better end of the deal, assuming the bride or the bride and her family pay for the wedding.JaymeC|1314497135|3003069 said:I am hoping to get him a watch at approx $5000. I think that cufflinks won't be substantial enough. I think that this is a drop in the bucket because I am thinking my ring will be upwards of $15000. I have a good job and good income, almost as much as him, so why shouldn't I get him something. He knows that I am planning this, so I think I'll wait until he proposes as it could be a while yet, then get him his gift. I think that its strange that we expect this large of a gift from our SOs, but many don't get them anything. Especially since women are moe substantial income earners than in times past.
MissStepcut|1314507751|3003274 said:At one time I would have agreed with this post whole-heartedly, but I see more nuance now. For one thing, this gift "for me" serves a purpose for him too: if I wanted a smaller diamond, he would be vehemently opposed because of how it reflects on him. For another, my income isn't really determinative of how I spend my money now, which will soon be our money: that is more of a budgeting question. Finally, the bride's family traditionally foots the bill for the wedding, which makes the tradition of groom paying for the ring equitable, or in many cases, puts a bigger financial burden on the bride. If you compare the median ring cost and median wedding cost, a groom would be getting the better end of the deal, assuming the bride or the bride and her family pay for the wedding.JaymeC|1314497135|3003069 said:I am hoping to get him a watch at approx $5000. I think that cufflinks won't be substantial enough. I think that this is a drop in the bucket because I am thinking my ring will be upwards of $15000. I have a good job and good income, almost as much as him, so why shouldn't I get him something. He knows that I am planning this, so I think I'll wait until he proposes as it could be a while yet, then get him his gift. I think that its strange that we expect this large of a gift from our SOs, but many don't get them anything. Especially since women are moe substantial income earners than in times past.