Keep what I have, or return for something simple

[mintve]

i think my FI is starting to freak out a bit. My step dad was laid off, so we are probably going to have to foot all or most of my mom and step dad''s contribution to the wedding.

I love my e-ring and had a hard time finding a wb i liked to go w/ it. We found one and I just picked it up last week. Well, now we are thinking we should return it. I still have about 10 days to decide. He likes the idea of a simple platinum band like this one https://store.weddingringhotline.com/product.php?xProd=598
which is about $1k less than the WB we bought. He said we can add an anniversary band down the road. I am torn b.c I love the WB we have, but then the idea of a simple ring and adding an updated anniversary ring in a year or so makes sense and I do like the idea of having a wedding band being a simple band.

What are your thoughts? I am torn and think my mind is clouded right now and I need some help.

 

[mintve]

here they both are on my hand.

unfortunately, I don''t have a photo of the plain platinum band on my finger w/ the e-ring.

 

[Maisie]

Is there any way of scaling the wedding back a bit so you can keep the ring you love? Your wedding is just one day but you will wear the ring for a lifetime. I would rather find ways of cutting costs than send the ring back.

 

[mintve]

Date: 3/17/2009 4:55:11 PM
Author: Maisie
Is there any way of scaling the wedding back a bit so you can keep the ring you love? Your wedding is just one day but you will wear the ring for a lifetime. I would rather find ways of cutting costs than send the ring back.

I wish that was possible, but at this point we are 6 weeks away and most things are set already.

 

[melz]

If it were me, the most important thing right now would be stress reduction. I wouldn''t want to stress about money every time I looked at my wedding band. A plain band would be lovely and then as you say, down the road you can get another. I imagine a plain band would come in handy when you are gardening or traveling, etc. anyway....

 

[shimmer]

Date: 3/17/2009 4:58:12 PM
Author: melanie987123
If it were me, the most important thing right now would be stress reduction. I wouldn't want to stress about money every time I looked at my wedding band. A plain band would be lovely and then as you say, down the road you can get another. I imagine a plain band would come in handy when you are gardening or traveling, etc. anyway....

I totally agree.

I got a diamond band for my original wband and later decided to get a plain band for it instead b/c then I can ALWAYS have my wband on, I don't have to send it away if it looses a stone...or take it off for sports etc. I got pretty sentimental and wanted matching bands too

(well his is 4mm, mine 2mm).

I'm sorry about your step dad

ETA: didn't you get the diamond band in WG but wanted plat? this way you can save enough to get the plat down the road!

 

[Maisie]

Date: 3/17/2009 4:56:59 PM
Author: mintve

Date: 3/17/2009 4:55:11 PM
Author: Maisie
Is there any way of scaling the wedding back a bit so you can keep the ring you love? Your wedding is just one day but you will wear the ring for a lifetime. I would rather find ways of cutting costs than send the ring back.

I wish that was possible, but at this point we are 6 weeks away and most things are set already.

Is the refund you would get enough to pay off the wedding? I would definitely get a plain band if you are going to have the bills coming in soon.

 

[ATM]

I sort of know how you feel. I was just about to pull the trigger on a nice stone when my GF''s mother lost her job. so it was either get the ring or pay her rent till she could get back on her feet.. now im back at almost $000 and have to start saving all over again. Remember its not about the ring when it comes down to it.. its about who your with.

things will get better.

 

[ATM]

also i have seen platinum bands after a few years.. ... really don''t hold up well.

 

[mintve]

Date: 3/17/2009 5:08:07 PM
Author: Maisie

Date: 3/17/2009 4:56:59 PM
Author: mintve

Date: 3/17/2009 4:55:11 PM
Author: Maisie
Is there any way of scaling the wedding back a bit so you can keep the ring you love? Your wedding is just one day but you will wear the ring for a lifetime. I would rather find ways of cutting costs than send the ring back.

I wish that was possible, but at this point we are 6 weeks away and most things are set already.

Is the refund you would get enough to pay off the wedding? I would definitely get a plain band if you are going to have the bills coming in soon.

it will not cover the remaining contribution from them, but it will put a dent in it.

At point I wanted a plain band b/c its classic and traditional, then I saw sparkling My fiance says to do what I want to do, but I think my waffling back and forth is driving him nuts.

 

[Maisie]

I understand where you are coming from. I am trying to decide between a plain wedding band or a sparkly one for when we renew our vows next year. I know it would be more affordable to buy a plain one.. but the sparkle just calls out to me!

Just remember if you can''t get the sparkle now, there is no reason you can''t get it later on. Its not like your FI is asking you never to get another ring. Hopefully it won''t be too long before you can get what you really want. Plus a plain band is much easier to wear 24/7.

You must be getting really excited for your wedding!! I wish my renewal was so close!

 

[swingirl]

I'd return it for a simple band. When you can afford it at a later date it'll be all that sweeter.

Plus, your FI should really be comfortable with how much is spent and it sounds like you both know the money is needed elsewhere.

I think a really skinny plain band would look very nice with your setting. Don't get anything too thick that will detract from the shape of your ering.