Smurfysmiles
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2007
- Messages
- 3,938
I''ve Been Banned!
- Thread starter PrincessLily2009
- Start date
- Status
ProseCuter
Rough_Rock
- Joined
- May 11, 2009
- Messages
- 70
I agree with those saying this is a bad situation, having been married to a man who also couldn''t stand up to his mother.
I highly advise against sending a letter or any written communication, for several reasons. First, you said she wants you to talk to her, so a letter may be seen by her as another way you are avoiding talking to her. Secondly, you don''t get tone and attitude from the written word, or, you can read in the tone or attitude you want. In other words, even if you carefully craft a letter to her, she will find a way to read something negative into it, without you being there to correct her assumptions when she reads it. DON''T DO IT!
I think it is your FI''s job to speak with his mother first, but it isn''t your job to force him to do so. If he did (on his own), then the 3 of you should get together (neutral place, as mentioned above) and discuss things. I don''t see this resolving without him taking some initiative here.
I highly advise against sending a letter or any written communication, for several reasons. First, you said she wants you to talk to her, so a letter may be seen by her as another way you are avoiding talking to her. Secondly, you don''t get tone and attitude from the written word, or, you can read in the tone or attitude you want. In other words, even if you carefully craft a letter to her, she will find a way to read something negative into it, without you being there to correct her assumptions when she reads it. DON''T DO IT!
I think it is your FI''s job to speak with his mother first, but it isn''t your job to force him to do so. If he did (on his own), then the 3 of you should get together (neutral place, as mentioned above) and discuss things. I don''t see this resolving without him taking some initiative here.
purrfectpear
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Mar 31, 2008
- Messages
- 4,079
Wake up and smell the coffee hun, you are in denial.
There is no "thinking of me as his future wife". There''s only him liking the "idea" of playing house, maybe, someday, you know, like fantasy time?
He likes things just fine the way they are. No rent, home cooked meals, laundry done, they probably give him gas money too.
Obviously whatever he gets out of living at home far, far, outweighs the idea of living with you, or standing up (aka pissing off) to his mom.
You are a distant second (probably more like third, after his ride and xbox) in his life. I suggest you move on.
There is no "thinking of me as his future wife". There''s only him liking the "idea" of playing house, maybe, someday, you know, like fantasy time?
He likes things just fine the way they are. No rent, home cooked meals, laundry done, they probably give him gas money too.
Obviously whatever he gets out of living at home far, far, outweighs the idea of living with you, or standing up (aka pissing off) to his mom.
You are a distant second (probably more like third, after his ride and xbox) in his life. I suggest you move on.
Italiahaircolor
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2007
- Messages
- 5,184
- Status
Past, Present, Future: The Meaning of Three-Stone Engagement Rings
Past, Present, Future: The Meaning of Three-Stone Engagement Rings - 04/14
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