Is the knee mandatory?

[mydon]

Ok...I bought the ring today (posted about my remorse on the price in another forum but that''s a different story)...now I''m trying to figure out how to propose. We are both very laid back and really don''t like public attention. My question is if it''s disappointing for a women if the guy doesn''t do the whole get on one knee routine. I just find it uncomfortable and almost like forced romance...which isn''t romantic to me...I''m afraid she''ll laugh at me and think it''s corny. I know I want to do it on my birthday...as her being my gift...but just not sure if giving it as a present or hiding it in something like a flower or around my cat''s neck is "romantic" enough...or does it really even matter? Help?

 

[Christy42]

The cat thing is good......just do something that she''ll remember, not necessarily the knee thing.
Make it an event, a private one, if you prefer, that she''ll still gush about when she''s old and gray, about the lengths you went to making this a memorable, personalized proposal.

You know her, so what would she like? Treasure hunt, delivery by the cat, a shiny dessert course? One thread out here said the diamond was inside the balloons that were also filled with rose petals......Good luck!

 

[bopitaddict]

Date: 3/3/2005 4:34:20 PM
Author: Christy42
You know her, so what would she like?

definitely agree with christy42, you know her best. i''m old-fashioned so when i do propose, i''m going to get on one knee (not in front of everyone though, i''m not much of a pda person either).

btw, welcome to pricescope... i read your rockytalk entry and while i''m not even close to an expert in diamonds (i just bought my first one last week and now i''m looking for a setting ), i think as long as you have peace of mind with your decision, even if it was at a b&m, you''ll be fine. there are a bunch of isee 2 threads around also to educate yourself if ya want... and i''m sure some of the experts would definitely give you their two cents.

best of luck with your engagement!!

 

[strmrdr]

Do the one knee thing believe me she will remember it forever.

 

[JCJD]

I was sad FI didn''t get down on one knee the first time he proposed (no ring), so I insisted that when he presented me with my ering that he do it. He did, I LOVED it, and all my girlfriends ask if he did or not. It''s a sweet, chivalrous (spelling?) romantic gesture that makes it obvious that you are asking her to marry you, and she will love it! Practice a bit so it becomes less awkward for you when the time comes.

 

[Gale]

I think this all depends on the overall mood you are looking for when you propose and how the two of you are together. If you are not a man with sweeping, romantic gestures, and are uncomfortable with it, then don't do it. There is a great part of me that dislikes the down-on-one-knee thing. Afterall, you are not begging her to be with you - you're asking. And there's something that feels not-quite-equal about that pose, to me. However, having said all that, there's this silly, irrational part of m that says, please bend that knee and make that effort to make me swoon. I think many women expect it, but I don't know anyone (other than those on PS with all these fabulous proposal stories) who was proposed to on bended knee. Proposing is one of the most romantic things you will ever do, regardless of your posture.

Sorry about your ring purchase. I hope you can get everything worked out there.

 

[codex57]

I did it. Romantic and me are definitely not synonymous. (I''m trying to improve). Still, I got down on one knee when I proposed. Arthritic knees and all. Yes they creaked and I couldn''t do it smoothly, but I think it''s just a very important traditional part of the proposal (kinda like the ring).

 

[appletini]

Definitely get down on one knee, plus everyone will ask her if you did.

 

[windy1365]

My fiancee got down on one knee. I thought it was kind of embarrassing. I had asked him not to ask my parents for their permission, but I guess I forgot to ask him not to get down on one knee. If you don''t want to do it, then don''t. She might be just as uncomfortable with it as you are. You know your woman better than we do, so go with how you feel.

 

[Cath]

Well, it''s definitely not mandatory -- I''ve never heard of a girl who said No because a guy didn''t get down on one knee. That said, my guy did it and I thought it was really sweet.

 

[jenwill]

Not mandatory at all...I think knowing what your FI would like is more mandatory than going with a tradition. I personally am not comfortable with grand displays of romanticism...and I know kneeling isn''t a GRAND display to some, but for me personally it is over the top.

So, you see, it really all depends on what she will think. In fact, I am so not ''all focus on me'' type of person, that my dream proposal comes in the form of us sitting on the beach with him sitting behind me and supporting me and proposing that way. So, cat, knee, other means...whichever you feel best resembles her personality..that is the one that I would go with. And I have never asked any friends if their fiance got on his knee to propose...I figure any proposal is romantic in its own individual way.

 

[hoorray]

I''m with you on the knee front. I think that unless it just seems right and natural at the moment, it is kind of forced, and detracts from the romance. I would do what feels right and sincere for you and for her, and don''t worry about what others think or say.

 

[elepri]

It depends, i think if it feels forced and you''re wondering if she might laugh, don''t do it. Personally, that''s exactly how i feel about the knee thing, i think it''s corny and forced and not romantic at all. I''m glad my fiance didn''t do it. Of course, if you think you girlfriend would want that, by all means, get on that knee, but i actually find your cat idea a lot more romantic in a unique and personal way.

 

[Gale]

Last Friday evening, I was proposed to in the kitchen. I made him get up off of his knee.

 

[nick9c]

I think eventually you should get down on one knee even if it''s a surprise like the cat thing. You are asking the most wonderful person in your life to marry you...why shouldn''t you show how crazy you are for her by getting down on one knee? It''s called chivalry and respect - something that has become long forgotten in this day and age. I don''t think it should be an embarrasing moment, even if it''s in public. This is the love of your life.

 

[MissAva]

Just remeber she loves you and you love her. No matter how you propose the point is that you are getting married. Every girl longs for that perfect moment and I am sure that between the idea and rings ya''ll (men) have it pretty rough. Just ask...