Is having kids addictive?

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 5/16/2009 1:03:38 AM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 5/15/2009 3:31:40 PM
Author: tlh

Date: 5/15/2009 12:34:06 AM
Author: LAJennifer
My brother says that once you have a baby, you always want one. Meaning you miss the baby when they''ve grown past the baby stage, so you want another one.

really???? man, poopey diapers...

Kind of funny, but poopy diapers were the least of my concerns. Even the big ones don''t faze me. But sleep deprivation! That is the #1 reason why I can''t fathom having another. It was only 3 months, but every day felt like hell, especially the first 5 weeks. I was always teetering on the edge, staring down into cuckooland.

So when did you finally fall over then?

Oooohhhh I kill me

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 5/16/2009 10:17:22 AM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 5/16/2009 1:03:38 AM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 5/15/2009 3:31:40 PM
Author: tlh

Date: 5/15/2009 12:34:06 AM
Author: LAJennifer
My brother says that once you have a baby, you always want one. Meaning you miss the baby when they''ve grown past the baby stage, so you want another one.

really???? man, poopey diapers...

Kind of funny, but poopy diapers were the least of my concerns. Even the big ones don''t faze me. But sleep deprivation! That is the #1 reason why I can''t fathom having another. It was only 3 months, but every day felt like hell, especially the first 5 weeks. I was always teetering on the edge, staring down into cuckooland.

So when did you finally fall over then?

Oooohhhh I kill me

Dreamer, that was where I WANTED to go, as I was sitting in hell!

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Oh, god, no way!!! There is NO way I'd ever want to be pregnant again or be stuck getting up 20 times a night to breastfeed! Plus all the diapers and stuff.

 

[LaraOnline]

Date: 5/15/2009 11:50:13 AM
Author: Jas12
Lara--ha! Oysters. You may be onto something there...need to build up a tolerance (not for the kid, but for the 'experiences' that are part of the pakage) I think the joy and love you feel for a child is what gets mom's thru the icky stuff. And once you have one, you know from experience that the hardest parts will end, to be replaced by something else challenging but again, fleeting. Went something like this for me


Hated being pregnant

strongly disliked the first weeks of motherhood

started to warm up to the idea

actually enjoyed it

could even use the word 'love' now

got itch for baby #2

(repeat)

HA!That's funny! I have heard it said by more experienced mums (two mums of four) that baby number TWO is the hardest to get used to, because it is a big change to get used to juggling the needs of two children... it's kinda a step up in pressure from the one. I have to say, that kind of makes sense to me, I found baby number two more difficult to adjust to, for a variety of reasons.
Ten days into this new third baby, I have to say I am finding her fitting more easily into my routine than I expected.
But it is confronting, isn't it, realising just how much is expected of mums. That sense of shock has diminished now haha. But after the first baby, for the first six months I really was thinking, ' Why isn't this baby stuff on the tv news headlines?!!" It's just so intense when you first go through it!

Pandora, have you had a baby yet??!! Reading your post was surreal! I hope it all went well!

L.

 

[SparkleSparkle]

OMG no! I wasn''t planning to have any kids at all but... stuff happens

. My pregnancy was uneventful (no sickness at all) but the rest was enough to convince me - NEVER AGAIN. 46 hours of labor in a teaching military hospital having countless people asking to "check me"

- 2.5 hours of pushing, forceps delivery, a week in the hospital (with 24-hour rooming in) with my arm splinted and an IV to treat an infection. Then came the colic (screaming 3 out of every 4 hours for 4 months).

Nope. Uh-uh.

My baby girl will be 21 in 2 weeks and I love her like there''s no tomorrow . The time does fly by...

 

[innerkitten]

Not for me. We wanted one, we had one and we still don''t want another. We are very happy as a small family.

 

[partgypsy]

I think it can; for me it was. For both pregnancies I just had this great vibe, despite physical discomfort something about it just made me feel happy as a clam, content. Once I started weaning my kid I had this hormone withdrawal which made me want another kid asap. I waited a respectable time to have the next to be sure it wasn''t just the "hormones talking".

When I was young was even considering being a surrogate mom/egg donor, only talked out of it by my partner and family because it could potentially affect future fertility. But if I didn''t plan to have kids I think it would have been great, to be part of bringing another child in the world without all the hard work of raising the child!
I love love my kids but I am done. Not only my age but lack of energy. And yes there is a reason sleep deprivation is a form of torture!

 

[trillionaire]

Date: 5/18/2009 12:52:24 PM
Author: part gypsy
I think it can; for me it was. For both pregnancies I just had this great vibe, despite physical discomfort something about it just made me feel happy as a clam, content. Once I started weaning my kid I had this hormone withdrawal which made me want another kid asap. I waited a respectable time to have the next to be sure it wasn''t just the ''hormones talking''.

When I was young was even considering being a surrogate mom/egg donor, only talked out of it by my partner and family because it could potentially affect future fertility. But if I didn''t plan to have kids I think it would have been great, to be part of bringing another child in the world without all the hard work of raising the child!
I love love my kids but I am done. Not only my age but lack of energy. And yes there is a reason sleep deprivation is a form of torture!

Hormones and biology fascinate me endlessly...

THANK YOU ALL for Sharing all of your stories! Great reads! I am so intrigued by everyone''s varied experiences!

 

[SparklyLibra]

I didn''t have the "need-to-have-baby-now" syndrome until recently. DH brought two girls into the marriage and I brought one as well. I very much am aching to have one of our own together!

 

[trillionaire]

FBIL just had a baby girl on Monday, and I am SO EXCITED! His wife came to the marriage with a son (almost 7) and I REALLY hope they have one more! They say they are done, but I''m keeping my fingers crossed! SO and I are not planning on kids, so it would be nice for them to have a boy to carry the family name

 

[atroop711]

not sure if it''s addictive but in my case I had 3 great pregnancies and easy deliveries. I loved being pregnant and do miss it (my youngest is 7mo). I loved the feel of the baby growing and moving inside of me. Honestly if I was younger, had lots more money and a huge apt (we live in NYC), I think I would have 1 more child.

As a teen I knew I wanted kids..then in my 20''s I said HELL NO to kids. I was too immature and selfish. Once in my 30''s I realized that I was still a kid and in a different place in my early 20''s and now I think I want kids. After lots of soul searching, I had my 1st at 32yr, 2nd at 36yr and 3rd at 40yr

 

[LtlFirecracker]

I don''t have kids. But my mother wanted three and after 2 had her tubes tied. She never said anything to me, but I can kind of tell by the pictures she was miserable pregnant.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/25/2009 3:28:59 AM
Author: trillionaire
FBIL just had a baby girl on Monday, and I am SO EXCITED! His wife came to the marriage with a son (almost 7) and I REALLY hope they have one more! They say they are done, but I''m keeping my fingers crossed! SO and I are not planning on kids, so it would be nice for them to have a boy to carry the family name

Trill, just keep you opinions on how freaky and gross pregnancy is to yourself and maybe your FBIL and FSIL might have one more, if they are able.

 

[KimberlyH]

My sister has one, she's done. She loves him and can't imagine expanding their family. My BIL would love another but the only way that's happening is by a major accident, which would mean IUD failure in their case.

All of my friends who have children have or want more than one. Some are limited (by age, finances, etc.) so they may never fulfill their wish but they would have more if they could.

 

[jas]

Date: 5/15/2009 7:44:45 AM
Author: EyeElle

Date: 5/14/2009 11:51:12 PM
Author: purrfectpear
Not in my case

Of course throwing up aproximately 1300 times over the course of 9 months will tend to put a damper on that urge

I have read alot of studies that show the more morning sickness you have throughout your pregnancy, the smarter your child will be. A total of 10 points higher, if I recall correctly. There is always a reason in nature to suffer.

Hmmm... I would love a source!

 

[trillionaire]

Date: 6/25/2009 4:51:25 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 6/25/2009 3:28:59 AM
Author: trillionaire
FBIL just had a baby girl on Monday, and I am SO EXCITED! His wife came to the marriage with a son (almost 7) and I REALLY hope they have one more! They say they are done, but I''m keeping my fingers crossed! SO and I are not planning on kids, so it would be nice for them to have a boy to carry the family name

Trill, just keep you opinions on how freaky and gross pregnancy is to yourself and maybe your FBIL and FSIL might have one more, if they are able.

Will DO TGal! Anything for more nieces and nephews!

I save those thoughts for SO, and PS only. I mean, come on, who wants to listen to someone blabbing about how pregnancy is icky? BLAAAAH! What a kill joy!

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 5/15/2009 7:51:18 AM
Author: Pandora II

Date: 5/15/2009 7:44:45 AM
Author: EyeElle

Date: 5/14/2009 11:51:12 PM
Author: purrfectpear
Not in my case

Of course throwing up aproximately 1300 times over the course of 9 months will tend to put a damper on that urge

I have read alot of studies that show the more morning sickness you have throughout your pregnancy, the smarter your child will be. A total of 10 points higher, if I recall correctly. There is always a reason in nature to suffer.

In that case, I''m expecting the next Einstein!

I NEVER want to be pregnant ever again in my life I have loathed it so much...and I haven''t been through labour yet.

Babies? I don''t know - I''m waiting for DH to come and get me to take me to the hospital since our ONLY child appears to have decided to turn up today.

Ask me in 4 weeks time

Okay, I''m back with the verdict:

I NEVER want to be pregnant again...

I NEVER want to give birth again...

But, our daughter was worth all of it and I do really enjoy having her and just seeing all the tiny changes every day. She''ll be 6 weeks on Sunday and is now starting to get a bit too big for the newborn clothes (but still too small for the 0-3 months) and I felt so sad packing some of them away!

They''re just so adorable when they are teeny tiny and I will miss that hugely as well as the lovely baby smell - but it''s made up for by seeing her grow... and learn to manipulate me more every day!

 

[LtlFirecracker]

Pandora,

It sounds like your daughter is giving you a lot of joy. Enjoy every minute of it!

 

[Black Jade]

Hated being pregnant. I was a thrower-upper.
Loved having babies. there''s nothing like holding a baby, nursing a baby, talking to a baby. I''m definitely looking forward to grandkids.
I don''t know if having babies is addictive or not--I think you have to be rather strong-minded to have lots of babies nowadays because it''s socially looked down on so much. I know several women who have very large families (6-9 kids) and they are all very independent minded, strong-minded types. Also very efficient! They make mothering look easy, which it sort of isn''t. It''s every bit worth it, but it''s a hard job, you need a good support system and you really need to want the kids and be sure that''s what you want to do with this phase of your life. But no matter what you do, it''s only a phase of your life. the kids grow up and you have to think of something else to do, which is the stage I''m in now. Fortunately, I''m very well-educated so have lots of choices there.

 

[LtlFirecracker]

Date: 6/26/2009 7:29:29 PM
Author: Black Jade
Hated being pregnant. I was a thrower-upper.

Loved having babies. there''s nothing like holding a baby, nursing a baby, talking to a baby. I''m definitely looking forward to grandkids.

I don''t know if having babies is addictive or not--I think you have to be rather strong-minded to have lots of babies nowadays because it''s socially looked down on so much. I know several women who have very large families (6-9 kids) and they are all very independent minded, strong-minded types. Also very efficient! They make mothering look easy, which it sort of isn''t. It''s every bit worth it, but it''s a hard job, you need a good support system and you really need to want the kids and be sure that''s what you want to do with this phase of your life. But no matter what you do, it''s only a phase of your life. the kids grow up and you have to think of something else to do, which is the stage I''m in now. Fortunately, I''m very well-educated so have lots of choices there.

This is kind of what I am expecting. I see pregnancy as something I have to "get through" to have children. I have seen several pregnant women over the last few years. Most of them just want it to be over. But once it is, they are very happy.

 

[Maisie]

Loved being pregnant (apart from the last one)

Giving birth was an experience ... I felt proud of myself afterwards but during the labour I hated it!

I really hated the first 2 months because of how exhausted I felt. Loved the baby, hated the effects on my body.

I had 5 children so I guess for me it was addictive. I would have another one if my husband hadn''t had the snippety snip!