Wedding In memory of...

[musincy]

How can I tastefully include our deceased grandparents on our wedding program? We do not plan on having flowers on the alter, but would like to mention their names in the program. Any suggestions?

Also, my grandmother is not well and will not be attending the wedding... is it okay if I still list her with our parents/his grandparents in the honored guests section of our program?

Thanks.

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 10/23/2008 5:04:11 PM
Author:musincy
How can I tastefully include our deceased grandparents on our wedding program? We do not plan on having flowers on the alter, but would like to mention their names in the program. Any suggestions?


Also, my grandmother is not well and will not be attending the wedding... is it okay if I still list her with our parents/his grandparents in the honored guests section of our program?


Thanks.

I think listing your grandmother is totally fine. As for the "in memory of", I like it when people leave one chair empty in honor of the relatives who couldn''t be there, and mention that in the program...I''ll try and think of other non-cheesy ways to do it...

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

 

[musincy]

Date: 10/23/2008 5:07:44 PM
Author: neatfreak

Date: 10/23/2008 5:04:11 PM
Author:musincy
How can I tastefully include our deceased grandparents on our wedding program? We do not plan on having flowers on the alter, but would like to mention their names in the program. Any suggestions?


Also, my grandmother is not well and will not be attending the wedding... is it okay if I still list her with our parents/his grandparents in the honored guests section of our program?


Thanks.

I think listing your grandmother is totally fine. As for the ''in memory of'', I like it when people leave one chair empty in honor of the relatives who couldn''t be there, and mention that in the program...I''ll try and think of other non-cheesy ways to do it...

I like the idea as well, but we have 5 grandparnets we would like to remember... I''m not sure I can leave 5 chairs empty.

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 10/23/2008 5:12:00 PM
Author: musincy

Date: 10/23/2008 5:07:44 PM

Author: neatfreak

Date: 10/23/2008 5:04:11 PM

Author:musincy

How can I tastefully include our deceased grandparents on our wedding program? We do not plan on having flowers on the alter, but would like to mention their names in the program. Any suggestions?



Also, my grandmother is not well and will not be attending the wedding... is it okay if I still list her with our parents/his grandparents in the honored guests section of our program?



Thanks.

I think listing your grandmother is totally fine. As for the ''in memory of'', I like it when people leave one chair empty in honor of the relatives who couldn''t be there, and mention that in the program...I''ll try and think of other non-cheesy ways to do it...

I like the idea as well, but we have 5 grandparnets we would like to remember... I''m not sure I can leave 5 chairs empty.

The idea is that it''s symbolic, you don''t actually need to do 5 chairs. The times I have seen it done it''s usually one chair for all people.

 

[musincy]

Date: 10/23/2008 5:15:10 PM
Author: neatfreak

Date: 10/23/2008 5:12:00 PM
Author: musincy

Date: 10/23/2008 5:07:44 PM

Author: neatfreak

Date: 10/23/2008 5:04:11 PM

Author:musincy

How can I tastefully include our deceased grandparents on our wedding program? We do not plan on having flowers on the alter, but would like to mention their names in the program. Any suggestions?



Also, my grandmother is not well and will not be attending the wedding... is it okay if I still list her with our parents/his grandparents in the honored guests section of our program?



Thanks.

I think listing your grandmother is totally fine. As for the ''in memory of'', I like it when people leave one chair empty in honor of the relatives who couldn''t be there, and mention that in the program...I''ll try and think of other non-cheesy ways to do it...

I like the idea as well, but we have 5 grandparnets we would like to remember... I''m not sure I can leave 5 chairs empty.

The idea is that it''s symbolic, you don''t actually need to do 5 chairs. The times I have seen it done it''s usually one chair for all people.

Oh, I see. I do like that idea... I''ll have to think about that!

 

[blackpolkadot]

We are leaving a chair with a single stem rose for each grandparent that has passed. Both set of parents loved that idea. I have also seen pictures on a table or candles built into an arrangement (the one I saw was on an alter type thing).

 

[lovemybug]

On the back page of our program above where our new address was listed, we just wrote ''In memory of our grandparents, who are now with our Lord'' and then their names

 

[DearBuddha]

I think it''s a sweet idea to include them somehow.

If I can make a suggestion, my grandfather and father both passed a few years before my wedding. I wanted to include them somehow but couldn''t figure out the right way to invoke their memories.

Finally I realized the nicest way to include them would be to remember them with music, and I asked our D.J. to play songs that the two of them would have played during the wedding dinner (i.e. lots of swing, Andrews sisters, classical, ect...). Everyone loved it b/c they felt like the two were still with us, and I loved it b/c it was meaningful and significant to me, my mother, and grandmother.

I think it''s lovely that you want to include them. I think it would be perfectly appropriate for you to include an "in memory", or a "we remember today..." Something along those lines would be really sweet.

 

[Nocturnius]

Gonna be honest here on the chair thing.

I personally think the "empty chairs" concept is depressing. I''ve only been to one wedding where this was done, and attention was drawn to it in the program... everyone was bummed throughout the ceremony and no one wanted to sit near the "memory chairs". It ended up leaving two full rows empty because no one, not even family, wanted to be seated next to the chair symbolizing the bride''s dead grandmother.

Candles with their names, mentioning them in the program, playing their favorite song during the reception, etc. are all nice ways to honor them without downing everyone. I''ll be totally honest with you - no one I know wants to go to a wedding and be reminded of those who are no longer here. Leaving empty chairs says, "gee, look at how much emptier our ceremony is without them" and it''s really sad. Dancing to your grandmother''s favorite song is a nice way to remind everyone of her, but in a good way - it lets them think about the happy times, instead of looking at an empty chair that just reminds them she isn''t there anymore.

 

[Gypsy]

I think mentioning them in the program is great. I think one symbolic chair with a rose (or one rose for each person that has passed) is great too. I love the music idea.

We didn't have programs, so we did a moment of silence for all who could not be with us. Then we did a memory table at the reception with the pictures of the deceased, candles and flowers. We got A LOT of compliments on that table, no one thought it was morbid that I know of, and actually I had two people who knew brides to be say that they would mention the idea to them.

But then, at Christmas every year I do a nice flower arrangement with candles with the pictures of lost loved ones, and it means a lot ot me to have them there in spirit.

Death is a part of life. It's a cycle. For me, to say that it has no place at a wedding just doesn't make sense... a wedding celebrates life, the joining of lives to be exact... and like it or not, death is a part of life.

 

[musincy]

Date: 10/24/2008 7:47:46 PM
Author: Gypsy
I think mentioning them in the program is great. I think one symbolic chair with a rose (or one rose for each person that has passed) is great too. I love the music idea.

We didn''t have programs, so we did a moment of silence for all who could not be with us. Then we did a memory table at the reception with the pictures of the deceased, candles and flowers. We got A LOT of compliments on that table, no one thought it was morbid that I know of, and actually I had two people who knew brides to be say that they would mention the idea to them.

But then, at Christmas every year I do a nice flower arrangement with candles with the pictures of lost loved ones, and it means a lot ot me to have them there in spirit.

Death is a part of life. It''s a cycle. For me, to say that it has no place at a wedding just doesn''t make sense... a wedding celebrates life, the joining of lives to be exact... and like it or not, death is a part of life.

I really like this idea. I was going to display wedding photos of our parents and grandparents at the reception, so maybe that''s really all I need to do. Anyone who knew them can remember them that way.