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I''m losing my diamonds... HELP!!!

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elc9983

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Mar 12, 2007
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After looking around at engagement rings my fiancé and I finally settled in on the perfect one. It consists of a largeer round center diamond on a full eternity band consisting of shared prong smaller round diamonds. I said I wanted something dainty, and it definitely is, as the band is pretty thin. I didn’t want anything to look bulky on my 4.5 size finger.



The ring fit perfectly, and looked perfectly in the beginning. The first couple of weeks my eyes were on it nonstop. Only after two weeks with my new piece of jewelry, I noticed two of the small diamonds missing. Taking off the ring, it appeared in an oval shape. Somehow the platinum bent, opening two the prong settings. Freaking out, we took it back to the jeweler who repaired it and told me to be careful with it. BUT I HAD BEEN!



They reshaped it back to a circle for me, and not even one day later, it bent back to an oval, although not so extreme. This time, I didn’t lose any diamonds. I took it to a different jeweler who said that sometimes platinum shapes to your finger. Assuming this is what it was, I did not worry about it. Two and a half months later… two diamonds are missing again.



I have read other stories on here about people losing their diamonds. I understand that over time, this can happen, but two times within the first three months of having it??? I do not want to spend the rest of my life replacing diamonds.



As far as the wear it goes through…
-I only wear it when going out of the house. Right now, I’m substituting, so work consists of reading a book and telling kids to be quiet.
-When I get home, I immediately take it off and set it on a jewelry dish.
-I do not wear it while working out, showering, sleeping, or when doing any housework or yard work.
Basically… it goes through NOTHING right now.

I know my life will get more fast paced shortly, and I am scared my ring won''t be able to handle any of it!



I just need help on how to handle this situation. The band was a pre-made band by a respectable family jeweler. I’m thinking it is just too thin or the jeweler used very poor platinum. Do I have any right to demand anything from the jeweler??? I understand there is no guarantee on wear, but I don’t understand why someone would make and sell a ring that had no chance of surviving less than six months. I know other people survive with their eternity bands, and I guarantee the only way to be safer with it than I am, is to keep it in its box.



HELP!!! WHAT DO I DO???
 

hopefulheidi

Shiny_Rock
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Jan 10, 2005
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335
Wow, I really don''t have any advice as we are just in the diamond purchasing stage but I feel for you.

I have a prefab Right hand ring in white gold and even after wearing it in SO many situations that I probably shouldn''t have, it looks just as good as it did 3 years ago when I first purchased it so I would expect for your more substantial Platinum piece to have a bit more staying power.

I hope someone here has some good advice for you because it sounds like you really need it!

~Heidi
 

Richard Sherwood

Ideal_Rock
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Sep 25, 2002
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Sounds like a design flaw (too thin) or a defective casting. Either way you''re due a new ring. Just tell the jeweler "I''m not happy with this ring. I love the look, but it is just not strong enough for everyday wear. I appreciate you trying to accomodate my preferences, but I need a ring that will last a lifetime. Please show me what you think will work."

They should give you a complete refund or full trade-in towards another ring. Don''t even think twice about asking for it.
 

Mara

Super_Ideal_Rock
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that doesn''t sound normal...i have an eternity ring set (prong set stones) in platinum and i have worn the e-ring for 4 years and the w-ring for 3 years and i am REALLY rough on my rings. bang them around, wear them while gardening, while working out etc etc...and they have held up amazingly. i only take them off at night basically. good luck getting things fixed and worked out!!
 

Richard Sherwood

Ideal_Rock
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Mara, you''re over 23,500 posts now. It''s time to start attending PA, Pricescope Anonymous.

The first step is admitting you''re a Diamondholic.
 

Mara

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hello, my name is mara, and i''m a diamondaholic. amongst other things.
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Richard Sherwood

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Good girl. There is a higher power that can help you. It is called, Colored Stones.

Go.....go to the light. The Colored Light.
 

elc9983

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 12, 2007
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I''m just worried because sometimes I can be a little of a pushover. I feel that they should definitely replace my ring or give me a full refund. I just hope I dont get in there and they somehow convince me that I have to eat the repair cost.

My fiance was the one who dealt with them in the beginning, but unfortunately he is out-of-pocket right now training for the marines. So now, I''m left to handle all this by myself. This is my first important piece of jewelry. With other things, if they break three months into having them, there is not much the store will do. Obviously diamond rings are a completely different transaction, though.

I DO deserve for this to be taken care of, right? They SHOULD be held responsible, right? What if they say that it is just common wear? Or that after we bought the ring, it is our full responsibilty now? Or that they already fixed it once, and they won''t do it again?

It isn''t unreasonable to demand a new ring, is it? Should they pay to have the diamonds replaced too, since it was their faulty ring that didn''t keep them in? Or should this be my cost???
 

Kaleigh

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Date: 3/13/2007 12:27:25 AM
Author: Richard Sherwood
Sounds like a design flaw (too thin) or a defective casting. Either way you''re due a new ring. Just tell the jeweler ''I''m not happy with this ring. I love the look, but it is just not strong enough for everyday wear. I appreciate you trying to accomodate my preferences, but I need a ring that will last a lifetime. Please show me what you think will work.''

They should give you a complete refund or full trade-in towards another ring. Don''t even think twice about asking for it.
Read this again, because it''s spot on.
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Hold firm, and please let us know how it goes.
 

Richard Sherwood

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A well made platinum ring should last a lifetime. I''ve seen plenty that have lasted two lifetimes and are still in great shape.

Unless your receipt says something about the merchandise being warrantied for less time, I would expect most stores would have a year''s warranty on a platinum ring.

Don''t wimp out. Your Marine husband is counting on you to hold up things while he''s gone. Semper Fi.
 

elc9983

Rough_Rock
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I should still be able to ask for an eternity band, right? Surely its just a desing flaw or defective casting, like Richard said. If others can wear them for years, surely I can too.

I absolutely love the look and I don''t want them to push "if you don''t want it to happen over and over again, you need to stay away from an eternity band."

Or do you all suggest I should do something different? It''s just that this is my dream ring!!!
 

kcoursolle

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Don''t feel bad about asking for a new ring, they made a mistake. Nothing to feel bad about, so stay strong.
 

justjulia

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Jewelers rely on repeat service. If they want yours, they will do the right thing.
 

Lynn B

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I am so sorry about this! What a DRAG! Yes, please keep us posted. (I also don't think you need to give up your "dream ring"... it may need a little tweaking but there are plenty of durable (and beautiful) styles similar to yours, so don't despair.) Can you post pictures of it?

On a side note... I knew what you meant by the title of your thread, but I still couldn't help chuckling. "I'm losing my diamonds!" reminded me of what we always say in our house when we've forgotten something or done something rather silly: "I'm losing my marbles!" BUT, I definitely like DIAMONDS better than MARBLES
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... so I think a new expression may have just been born in our house! So, hey thanks!
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PS Hey Rich! Good to see you, my friend!
 

elc9983

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First of all, to let you all know the situation with the jeweler... My fiance has a connection to a respectable diamond company. They, in turn, work with a preferred jeweler who does all their work. So when my fiance went in the first time, he met with the diamond people and they had all the jewelers sample engagement rings. The first time we had the diamonds replaced, we took it to the diamond people, who then took it to their jeweler. Basically, we have never had any contact with the actually designer/jeweler of the ring. I don''t know if any of this really matters, but I left it all out in the beginning because my first post was already long enough.

Anyways... I called the diamond people and the lady we have been working with was anything but nice. I told her the situation and that it had happened AGAIN. I explained that I had gotten several people''s opinions and what they had been telling me - design flaw, defective casting, etc. I even took it into another jeweler this morning, so someone who had actually seen the ring could tell me what they thought, plus I would have one more opinion. He told me that the ring was WAY too thin, and that it would bend no matter what metal it was.)

I told all this to the lady and she got quite mad. She said, "You know we have already fixed it for you once. It can''t be the ring because I have the exact same band and I wear it all the time, and do everything in it. The only time in the past three years I have lost a diamond was when I was clapping really hard at a concert and it knocked it out. If you don''t feel you can wear it then come in and the owner will talk to you."

Talk to me? What does that mean? Talk me into buying another band??? Talk and convince me they aren''t responsible. She definitely did not have that "you are the customer, how can we help you" attitude.

I got the feeling from her that they aren''t taking any responsibility. Which, in a way, it isn''t there problem. They only provided the diamonds. BUT the jeweler made a faulty band. Which I guess is what makes it complicated. Plus, since she has "the exact same band" and nothing has happened to hers, she feels that it is NOT the ring, but ME!

I''m going in soon and I feel that they will not be helpful. I just don''t know what to do!
 

mrssalvo

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Date: 3/13/2007 1:27:27 PM
Author: elc9983
My fiance has a connection to a respectable diamond company.


I always try to discourage folks from making large jewelry purchases from a friend of a friend or 'connection." It makes it so much more difficult to correct problems as you are know experiences first hand. I now it's tough buy you are going to have to try to be strong and say a ring that hasn't been mistreated shouldn't be falling apart and you would like to return it or exchange it for a new ring. i personally would no longer have confidence in the company and would fight to get the refund. Of course, it all depends on the policy of the jeweler, do you have a receipt or any paper work with warranty info? Good luck, fingers crossed that they will do the right thing for you and give you the outcome you desire. diamonds don't just randomly pop out of high quality rings and if the lady lost one while clapping too hard then her ring isn't well made either
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chiefneil

Shiny_Rock
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Feb 7, 2007
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That salesperson is a jerk. The ring is defective and they need to replace it. Tell her you''re happy hers is fine, but yours is clearly defective. I''ve taken jewelry to be repaired at the original store years after purchase and they always repair for free. B&M stores need to provide this type of service in the internet age if they want people to pay the premium for buying locally, and also if they want repeat business. You as the consumer also need to go in expecting good service, because a lot of times that attitude will actually help you get what you want.
 

elc9983

Rough_Rock
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Mar 12, 2007
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The thing that gets me about all of this is that we still have to purchase my eternity wedding band. We were planning on doing it through them, but after all the problems and how unhelpful they have been, why would we want to?
 

hikerchick

Brilliant_Rock
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Date: 3/13/2007 2:51:24 PM
Author: elc9983
The thing that gets me about all of this is that we still have to purchase my eternity wedding band. We were planning on doing it through them, but after all the problems and how unhelpful they have been, why would we want to?
Ouch !!! You wouldn''t and shouldn''t make any more purchases from them until they work to fix these major issues. And even if they do fix it, reconsider buying from them unless the rest of your interactions are pleasant and problem free.

Can you maybe post a picture? I am curious as to the style of ring.
 

elc9983

Rough_Rock
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Mar 12, 2007
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So, I made my trip to see the diamond people that we got our ring from. Talk about an awful trip...

The lady who I talked to on the phone that wasn''t too nice, was actually very sympathetic when I got in there, which was a nice surprise. She was dumbfounded by what had happened, twice, and her only thought was that the band might need a "comfort fit" which would increase the platinum. Of course, this is something extra we would pay for. I kept stressing that I''m not the only person with an eternity band and this isn''t a common occurrence... something is wrong. Her suggestion was for my fiance to go ahead and buy the wedding band (also eternity) and have them sautered together NOW, 6 months before the wedding. This would give the ring more stability. Unfortunately, being young, we can''t just plop down the money for a ring like that all at once and so soon from the original purchase. (They don''t have any payment plans, you pay for everything up front when you get the ring.) But she was just the sales lady...

Then she sent me in to see the owner/diamond dealer. He was the absolute rudest person I have ever met. He went on to explain that this band was his most popular seller and that this never happened. It is not too thin, it is not designed poorly. It is me. After telling him everything I had learned, from on here and from the jeweler, he said everyone was wrong. That yes, NORMAL people can wear bands like this, but with how I treat this ring, I would have to wear something two to three times as thick. That I obviously did not take care of it and I banged it around. I kept stressing that I don''t do anything in it, I wear it about 25-50% of the time I''m awake, and that I baby it. What did I get, "no, that is a lie, you don''t know what you are talking about. you have banged this ring up beyond repair to the point that you now have stress fractures in it." He cut me off everytime I started and said that I was not right. I walked out of there about to burst into tears.

The ONLY option he gave me was to jump up to a thicker band, which is not what I do. I don''t know how to handle the man or demand what I deserve. He seems to not care at all what I think or what they "owe" me. HELP!

I''m attaching a pic of my ring. I completely forgot I had pics on my computer of my ring. It''s a 1.15 center diamond, and 30 small diamonds, adding to .7 all together. The more and more I look at eternity bands on here, the more and more I feel mine is not good quality. Tell me what you think...

elc9983(1).JPG
 

elc9983

Rough_Rock
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Mar 12, 2007
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from another angle...

elc9983(2).JPG
 

iheartscience

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First of all, I am so sorry to hear about these problems you''re having!

Here''s my take: you have to decide what you want to accomplish first and foremost. Do you want the ring replaced by the same jeweler or do you just want your money back at this point? If it were me I would just want my money back so I could take my business elsewhere. That''s a very common style ring and you should be able to find a better quality one easily.

Either way, I think you need to march back into that jeweler prepared for a fight. If you have a firm, strong attitude and don''t allow yourself to be intimidated I think you''ll get much further.

Here''s what I would do:

I would start by asking the jeweler if he''s really calling a paying customer a liar to their face. I would also let him know that unless he replaces/refunds, you will not be doing anymore business (wedding rings, earrings, etc.) with him and you will be making a complaint with the Better Business Bureau. Furthermore, you will be informing all of your friends/families/coworkers not to do business with him.

If he gets rude with you again, I would do the interrupting and tell him you don''t appreciate his tone. I also think it wouldn''t hurt to bring a bolder, more forceful relative with you if you don''t think you can stand up to him. I know it might seem silly, but I think it''s better than getting bowled over again and leaving again without a resolution.

From what it sounds like, you have a poorly made eternity band and you are doing everything in your power to not hurt the ring. That''s all a jeweler should need to hear before offering to repair/replace. I understand gently suggesting to a customer a thicker band, but for him to dismiss everything you are saying in such a rude manner is completely unacceptable and unbelievable to me.

Good luck and remember-you are correct and you deserve to be treated in a respectful manner.
 

elc9983

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 12, 2007
Messages
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Thanks for the help! Your right, at this point, I do not want to deal with them anymore and just want my money back. He adamently believes it is not their fault at all, so getting anything of him may be a little hard. The way he talked, anything they did, I would have to pay for. I just want my money back. I do not know if there was any kind of receipt with refund/replacement policy that came on it. We trusted this place, so that was the last thing my fiance was worried about. All I have from my fiance to go in our records are the GIA diamond grading report, and the appraisal - not receipt of any kind.

Oh, remember when he said that I would never be able to wear a band like I have, and that I would have to get one two or three times as thick??? I found a picture online of the one he showed me. Nothing against the ring, but it isn''t ANYTHING like my dream ring. He said this was the best I could do, since I am not normal, if I wanted a ring that would last me. Here it is...

elc9983altring.jpg
 

jaz464

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 11, 2005
Messages
2,022
What is the width of that band? It looks teeny tiny. Too thin to be safe.
 

elc9983

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 12, 2007
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I don''t have the exact specs. But I think it is at least 2mm. Is this too thin???

I found a picture of teebee''s ring - this is what we wanted all along. They diamond guy had two choices... the ring we picked out, or something similar to the whiteflash ring I posted. I know the wf isn''t channel set, but it has that same sort of thick, outer rim of metal on both sides that I didn''t want.

Can I stay away from these thicker, outer rims and still have a safe ring???

elc9983(teebee).jpg
 

Diamond*Dana

Ideal_Rock
Premium
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Jul 21, 2006
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7,335
I am so sorry that you are having this problem with your ring, how awful! That guy is a jerk, period. I would be livid if I was in your shoes...I agree with demanding that you get your money back. Also, I agree with taking another person in there with you. Good luck, and I really do hope that this jeweler does the right thing for you.
 

boston_jeff

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Date: 3/13/2007 10:03:25 PM
Author: elc9983
All I have from my fiance to go in our records are the GIA diamond grading report, and the appraisal - not receipt of any kind.

I am sorry you are going through this, elc, and the problems with the rings are not your fault, and the jeweler is clearly not a good person or businessman, but... No receipt? I could not imagine making any type of purchase as large as an e-ring with getting (a) a receipt and (b) a clear understanding, in writing, of the vendor''s return and upgrade policy.

I am really pulling for you, and I think you should stand strong and use the threats of the BBB and future business to get this guy to side with you, but documentation of the policies would have made the argument easier. Does the vendor have a website where the policies might be posted?
 

elc9983

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 12, 2007
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Sorry I wasn''t clear... we have a receipt. I just don''t think their repair/replacement/refund policy is written out on it. It may be on another sheet he has from them, or it may not be written anywhere. I will check into it.

I, however, do not have the reciept. Immediately after buying the ring/proposing, my fiance left for marine training in Virginia. He gave me the appraisal and diamond grading info to turn in for insurance, but everything else is at his parents house.

So,
-he is out-of-pocket training in Virginia
-all the ring paperwork is at his parents house
-i am left alone to figure out everything WITHOUT all the correct information

Hence all the trouble I am in.

I wanted to leave his parents out of it as long as I could, but I ended up breaking down today and going over to let them take charge of the situation. Although the papers for the ring are at their house, there is no telling where my fiance hid them. You know men and their filing system, that only they know how to figure out...

Hopefully his dad will take charge and get me what I deserve. We will see...
 

Kaleigh

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
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29,571
I''d have his Dad go with you and demand your money back. You need back up support. I am pulling for you as well. Good luck!!!
 

mrssalvo

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 3, 2005
Messages
19,132
Date: 3/14/2007 12:56:47 AM
Author: Kaleigh
I''d have his Dad go with you and demand your money back. You need back up support. I am pulling for you as well. Good luck!!!

I agree having his dad may help you here. even if he goes to the store with you and doesn''t say anything, his presence will make a statement.

honestly, from the pics the ring looks very thin to me too. 2mm should be safe if it is a well made peice but this is where the quality of settings can differ greatly with some truth being getting what you pay for. If it were me, I''d go for the refund. Tell them you will report them to the BBB and the Jewelers Vigilance Committee (which is a bigger deal) if they don''t cooperate and make this right for you. Of course their refund policy is going to be key. If they are clear that they don''t give refunds under any circumstances you may have to chalk up the experience as lesson learned and buy a new setting somewhere else. I''m so very sorry you''re dealing with this, being engaged should be joyful and having major problems with your ring is no fun and I wish the jeweler would have been more compationate. good luck and I hope you can find the papers with the return policy.
 
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