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How old were you when your *biological clock* kicked in?

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E B

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Date: 4/23/2009 1:52:05 PM
Author: musey

Can you tell I'm feeling a bit conflicted?
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I understand both your feelings and your situation. DH and I lived in Los Angeles a few years ago as well. We knew we couldn't afford to buy a home (and ultimately raise a family) there, so we moved. Our careers didn't require us to be there, however, and we had no family there either.

Is it important to you and your husband to buy a house before you start trying for a baby? For some people it is, and that's completely understandable. Before we started trying, we decided it was important to us to be able to buy a house around the time kiddo #1 was starting school, but before then, we were (and are!) fine renting.
 

Loves Vintage

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Date: 4/23/2009 1:52:05 PM
Author: musey

Date: 4/23/2009 9:45:13 AM
Author: Dani
I always knew I wanted to be a mom....I feel a *slight* urge to have a baby now, but I know its not the right time yet. MH feels the same way. I''m 30, he''s 34. We are probably going to wait at least another 2 years. I know there will never be a perfect time, but we feel that we have a lot more things to do before children (buy a house, travel, etc). At this point though, we are the only couple in our circle of friends that are childless or not pregnant!!!!!

I am definitely looking forward to it when it happens though!!!
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I was always the same way, especially with traveling. I thought a baby would mean no more traveling, until they were old enough to be self-sufficient anyway, but my in-laws have completely put that fear to rest for me. They took my husband to Europe when he was six weeks old, and they never stopped traveling since. He was quite the jet-setter, and had been almost everywhere in the world by the age of 15.

So now that that''s a non-issue, the only thing standing in our way is income. We don''t make enough to do what we want to do AND buy a house AND have a kid. The problem is, though, that in a lower cost-of-living area, our income would be PLENTY to have a fantastic house and do a lot of traveling AND have a kid. So then the problem is no longer money, but money in our location - so if we got pregnant, we could move and slip right into the lifestyle we wanted to have with a baby... but then it would mean giving up my career (as I have to be where we currently are). So THEN it becomes an issue of career vs. kid, which is not a decision I''m ready to make.

Can you tell I''m feeling a bit conflicted?
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I used to travel quite a bit solo. A few years ago, I met a couple at a fairly remote Buddhist Temple in Japan, where you could stay and experience the lifestyle of a Bhuddist monk. They had their two little girls with them. They were maybe 5 and 7. They were traveling around Japan with them for a few weeks. How cool is that? At the time, I recall thinking -- that''s the kind of parent I''d want to be!
 

musey

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Date: 4/23/2009 2:31:28 PM
Author: EBree
Date: 4/23/2009 1:52:05 PM
Author: musey
Can you tell I''m feeling a bit conflicted?
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I understand both your feelings and your situation. DH and I lived in Los Angeles a few years ago as well. We knew we couldn''t afford to buy a home (and ultimately raise a family) there, so we moved. Our careers didn''t require us to be there, however, and we had no family there either.

Is it important to you and your husband to buy a house before you start trying for a baby? For some people it is, and that''s completely understandable. Before we started trying, we decided it was important to us to be able to buy a house around the time kiddo #1 was starting school, but before then, we were (and are!) fine renting.
Yes and no... we want to have a bigger place (than, um, our 500 square-foot 1-bedroom apartment) before kids, and we''d planned to stay here (it''s small, but it works) until we can buy so that we don''t ''waste'' more money than necessary on rent.

I think the one thing that makes me settle on "no, I''m not ready" every time I think about it is that even if we could afford to stay here, I couldn''t afford to pursue my career, period. We have no family in town so no options for free/low-cost sitting, so we couldn''t afford childcare were I to keep acting. So if we stayed here, I couldn''t afford my career anyway... so then we might as well move, which takes us back to square one.
 

DivaDiamond007

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Date: 4/22/2009 10:34:27 PM
Author: musey

Date: 4/22/2009 10:15:02 PM
Author: PilsnPinkysMom
Anyone have it kick in at a young-ish age? Diva, you said 24... To me, that qualifies.
I am also 24
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I was young when I got bit by the baby bug. I was just shy of my 23rd birthday when DH and I got married and we didn''t want to have kids right away - in fact, I was on the fence the entire time we dated and were engaged. I got pregnant when I was 25 and was 26 when I delivered. My mom was really young - she was only 18 when I was born.

Our son, James, is 9.5 months old and I want another one already
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I loved being pregnant (except for the morning sickness) and although I had complications during my labor & delivery it wasn''t enough to deter me from having another baby.

DH and I are planning on only having one more child so we don''t want them to be too far apart in age. If we get into a financial situation where I could stay home then we''d have 3 or more children.
 

Black Jade

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I always wanted to have kids, even though I was 20 in 1977, when expressing a desire to have children was just something NOT DONE among educated, ambitious women. But I still wanted to have kids as soon as I could, I just always loved them, not just babies, but all kids from toddlers up to teenagers.
I had my first child at 28, and although I had been married for two years, I took a lot of flack for it. I was very highly educated, Ivy League college, post-grad degree and people kept telling me how I was letting women down by becoming pregnant.
I didn''t really care.
I ended up having 3 kids and even though I have two in the terrible twenties now, they make me very happy and I''m glad I did it.
I just really want to have grandkids now!
 

Aloros

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I''m 26, nearing 27, and my bio-clock is ticking quietly right now. It''s a rather slow, rather complacent clock. I''ve got a lot going on career-wise, so I''m really not sure that I will ever have children. Plus, I am clueless when it comes to babies.

I wonder if it will ever really kick in at all.
 

icekid

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Date: 4/23/2009 1:46:36 PM
Author: mia1181
Everyone is different. Most of the women I know hated being pregnant (obviously happy with the end result) but I know someone now who is 20 weeks and still having brutal MS and all that, but is just loving being preggo. I also think it has to do with factors such as how easy it was to concieve. People who have had a difficult time concieving seem to enjoy (and appreciate) their pregnancy a bit more.

I personally don''t care about the pregnant part. I wouldn''t be disappointed if I never carried my child. I just want to have a baby that is mine.
Can I just DITTO my twin??
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musey- It just started for me around 6 months ago, so 27. Baby fever, in the worst way! I would personally prefer to never be pregnant, but adoption seems to be too long off for me to wait
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I need to lay off the preggo thread lurking though- the babies are toooo cute. So much like you, I have the itch... but we''re just not in the right place yet to fit a baby into our life.
 

Lauren8211

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Still waiting!
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PilsnPinkysMom

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Date: 4/23/2009 12:12:56 PM
Author: Blackpaw
Or is it finding the pregnant pricescopers thread on pricescope?
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Bingo. I''m seriously obsessed. Hope this doesn''t creep out the preggo or TTC ladies
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So, after being "honest" with myself, I realize in 3.4-5.5 years I would definitely like to have started the TTC process. FI is on the same page. I just had an IUD inserted, so technically I have five BC-free years. We''re going to "reevaluate" in four years, see how we''re feeling, if we''re at a point where one of us can take a year off of work, and then move forward.

FI will be into his 30''s by then.

I guess that I never view a baby as detracting or taking away from our relationship, though it will (of course) add some stress and a few trials and tribulations. It just seems like a happy, wonderful thing, once we''re actually able to provide and care for and give a little one every little thing he/she would want and need.
 

canuk-gal

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HI:

After 30, having been married about 6 years; absolutely no inkling before. At all. All of a "sudden" it just seemd like the time was "right". My DH had been ready since day 1.

cheers--Sharon
 

DivaDiamond007

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Date: 4/23/2009 4:14:26 PM
Author: Aloros
I''m 26, nearing 27, and my bio-clock is ticking quietly right now. It''s a rather slow, rather complacent clock. I''ve got a lot going on career-wise, so I''m really not sure that I will ever have children. Plus, I am clueless when it comes to babies.

I wonder if it will ever really kick in at all.
Yeah - me too, but we''re getting by. You don''t know what you can do until you have to.
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It''s cliche, but it is totally different when it''s your own kid.
 

Black Jade

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Date: 4/23/2009 1:12:24 PM
Author: Pandora II

Date: 4/22/2009 10:15:02 PM
Author: PilsnPinkysMom
Good question, Musey! This topic always interests me.

Anyone have it kick in at a young-ish age? Diva, you said 24... To me, that qualifies.

I don''t know that it''s my biological clock (I''m a baby! 23!), but man-oh-man I''ve got some crazy interest in pregnancy.

To be clear: I do not want a baby now, or possibly for the next 5-12 years, I definitely couldn''t support one the way that I hope to down the road, and I''m still in my honeymoon-wedding planning-self-centered phase, which I hope to drag out for a whiiiiiiiiile...

BUT: I''m totally fascinated by pregnancy and being pregnant, would love to share that experience with J and my extended family, and really love baby clothes. (Good reason to get KTFU, right?) Babies are okay, too
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, but once they start talking- I have NO interest
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So maybe I''m a few years behind you, Musey? It crosses my mind, I contemplate it, but I''m nowhere near being serious about starting a family. A few years ago, the wheels were NOT turning AT ALL. Even remotely. In fact, I despised babes. I think after a friend or two gets hitched, and someone in your peer circle pops a bun outta the oven, the mommy-thoughts begin (for those who think they may want to be parents, anyway)

Ah well. Perhaps when I''m a REAL adult I''ll hear the clock
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To be completely honest, being pregnant has been one of the more unpleasant experiences of my life - and my husband has zero interest in ever sharing the experience again, and we haven''t even got to the birth yet! In fact I''m so desperate NOT to be pregnant anymore that I''m not even nervous about the birth part - I just want it done asap!

I believe some people sail through and love it - and I never expected to feel the way I have, but 26 weeks of 24/7 morning sickness, rib and back pain so bad that you can''t walk for more than 5 minutes and all the other nasty bits that NO-ONE tells you about before you get pregnant have left me with no appetite to do it again and our daughter will definitely be an only child unless they find a way of growing them in jam jars for the whole 9 months!
Hang in there. I was the same. I had morning sickness 24/7 all nine months with ALL my kids.
No one had warned me that this was possible, either. I think it IS unusual, but that doesn''t matter when its YOU.
But the baby was so worth it that I did it two more times. and was just as sick each time.
Later I found out that I inherited this problem from my paternal grandmother, who had SEVEN kids in spite of it.
altough I didn''t want to do anything but lie in bed between barfing and wanting to barf, I did find, with the third pregnancy, that exercising helped a bit. I did a very mild aerobics class, no jumping and would at least feel better while I was in the class. I wouldn''t have expected this.
SOME people are amazingly healthy through their whole pregnancies and never have a single day of discomfort, let alone illness (my mother and sister are like that, and were very confused and not too sympathetic to me) but do remember, lots of people are much worse, I never had to do bed rest for months, or have a c-section, I never had a miscarriage, which is surprisingly common (I have hardly any friends who never had one), and I never got varicose veins, even (though my feet did grow two sizes and never went back). Someone once told me that women who have a ton of morning sickness actually have more than their share of certain hormones (I forget which ones) which make you have really healthy babies. so you can take comfort in that.
 

SarahLovesJS

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I''d say mine is ramping up in that I could see myself having kids within the relatively near future (less than 10 years)..I am 22. We don''t plan on having kids right now, we want to be more financially stable (have a house preferably, get some student loans paid down, etc.) and we both want me to finish law school first..but the babies are at least starting to look cuter and cuter to me! And I could at least see myself having one after about 4-5 years are so (that''s my goal). My parents were 20 when they had me which was a bit too young in my opinion, but we''re very close so it worked out.
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In the meantime I''ll just play with other people''s babies, send them home when they get cranky, and enjoy us-time with FI!
 

Dreamer_D

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When I was in my 20s I always said that I would wait until I was about 33 or 34 to have kids, mostly for career reasons. DH and I got married when I was 28 and I said, "We''ll wait 4 more years!" But after being married for about a year the bug hit hard. Now we have a two month old! I''m turning 31 this month.

Musey, I don''t know how long you have been married but I seem to think it is not too too long? I think getting married can be a real clock winding event for many women who always knew they would have kids. I''m willing to bet good money you won''t make it 4 more years!
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I didn''t!

And by the way... from the time I started asking questions like, "How old were you when your biological clock kicked in?" until we were preggo was about 6 months.
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Haven

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My clock started buzzing for a while shortly after DH and I married last July, but all ticking has since retreated back into the dark and quiet cave that it was hiding in before.

I''m 28 now, DH is 39, and we''re just not interested in having kids yet. I''ve always wanted to be a mom, and DH a dad, but we''re not ready yet. I can''t really say why, exactly. We bought our home together, we have a nice savings piling up, good jobs, and a puppy and three cats that are extremely well cared for.

Actually, I do know one bit of it: I get terrified and panicky whenever I think about having a baby. That''s not to say I don''t get a little dreamy when I see cute little baby clothes or well-behaved children out in public. But when I think about having a child of our own, I get scared. Just not there yet.

I suppose I thought I''d be ready by this age, but since I''m not yet feeling that urge I''m not going to push it.

Besides, literary critic Michael Dirda said something like "Anyone who isn''t ready to read to his child for an hour a day is not ready to have children." I''m not ready to give up that much of my *own* reading time, yet!
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MonkeyPie

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When I met DH
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I always said I would never have kids, and wished I could just tie all that sh*t up in there to prevent it, even when I was in high school. But as I got older the idea of babies repulsed me less, and now I can''t wait to have babies with DH. We plan to wait one more year - we want to be in a house so we won''t have to uproot a toddler moving from apartment to house or whatever - and then it is ON.

I wish we could adopt, but it is so damn hard, and we have a lot of factors that would probably prevent it from happening. Not to mention we don''t make enough money and it is EXPENSIVE to adopt. You would think it would be easier, there are so many kids that need homes!
 

luvthemstrawberries

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Date: 4/23/2009 10:18:40 PM
Author: Haven
My clock started buzzing for a while shortly after DH and I married last July, but all ticking has since retreated back into the dark and quiet cave that it was hiding in before.

I''m 28 now, DH is 39, and we''re just not interested in having kids yet. I''ve always wanted to be a mom, and DH a dad, but we''re not ready yet. I can''t really say why, exactly. We bought our home together, we have a nice savings piling up, good jobs, and a puppy and three cats that are extremely well cared for.

Actually, I do know one bit of it: I get terrified and panicky whenever I think about having a baby. That''s not to say I don''t get a little dreamy when I see cute little baby clothes or well-behaved children out in public. But when I think about having a child of our own, I get scared. Just not there yet.

I suppose I thought I''d be ready by this age, but since I''m not yet feeling that urge I''m not going to push it.

Besides, literary critic Michael Dirda said something like ''Anyone who isn''t ready to read to his child for an hour a day is not ready to have children.'' I''m not ready to give up that much of my *own* reading time, yet!
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Haven - I was just curious and wanted to ask you a question. Your husband is about the same age as my fiance (mine''s 38). I''m sure you, as I do (I''m almost 24), don''t see the age difference between you when you look at him and are around him. I know that more and more people are having babies in their 30s and 40s now anyway. But I was just curious if you guys have talked about that any in regards to him wanting to have kids by a certain age or anything. My FI has a stepbrother in his mid-40s who has one kid and a pregnant wife right now. FI''s not worried, but we''ve talked a little before about how he''ll be 39 when we get married, and we want some time together and to become more stable, but he also doesn''t want to wait that long before having a first child, because we hope to have a few. That would put him into his 40s also. He''s not concerned, and he''s very healthy and acts more like someone in his young 30s. I guess what I''m asking is, has your husband''s biological clock ticked at him any? Or does he ever express any questions or concerns over that? This really is just a curious question I wanted to bounce off you since we''re in similar situations. You don''t have to elaborate if you don''t want to.
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Bia

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I''m sort of torn. FI wants to start trying soon after we get married. Actually he said he might be interested in trying a few months before we get married
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BUT, that''s NOT going to happen.

He''s just turned 32, so he doesn''t want to be an ''older'' father. I just turned 27 and don''t want to have a baby before we have checked a few things off our ''to do'' list. But, I do want a baby. Two, to be exact.

So, my clock is still dormant...I''m just not sure how long it''s going to stay that way.
 

mayachel

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I work with pregnant women and babies and for years, said that while I knew I wanted one of my own, that it was far better to live vicariously through their births. Even going so far as to joke, that those first 48 hours post partum were good visions of birth control.

All the same, I am now 28 years old and that clock went BOOM and is ticking very loudly. A long time ago, I thought I''d be a "young" mom, say 22-25 with my first. Than around 25 I started saying 30 was the year. Right now I''m in the midst of grad school and the particulars make it a terrible time to have a baby. The year I turn 30, will be the year I graduate, also not ideal but I don''t know how I could wait much longer. (The suspense is killing me
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But wait we will.
 

musey

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Date: 4/23/2009 10:16:34 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie
Musey, I don''t know how long you have been married but I seem to think it is not too too long? I think getting married can be a real clock winding event for many women who always knew they would have kids.
Yep you''re right, about 6 months
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I''m willing to bet good money you won''t make it 4 more years!
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I didn''t!

And by the way... from the time I started asking questions like, ''How old were you when your biological clock kicked in?'' until we were preggo was about 6 months.
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No!!!!!! I''m holding firm. My life would be completely different if I had them soon vs. 4+ years from now, and while I would accept and be happy about the sacrifices, it would be a disappointment on some level - I feel like I''ve worked too hard for too long to let it all go just yet.

Wow, I guess I just cleared it up in my head
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Thanks, dreamer!!
 

Haven

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Date: 4/24/2009 9:02:27 AM
Author: luvthemstrawberries

Haven - I was just curious and wanted to ask you a question. Your husband is about the same age as my fiance (mine''s 38). I''m sure you, as I do (I''m almost 24), don''t see the age difference between you when you look at him and are around him. I know that more and more people are having babies in their 30s and 40s now anyway. But I was just curious if you guys have talked about that any in regards to him wanting to have kids by a certain age or anything. My FI has a stepbrother in his mid-40s who has one kid and a pregnant wife right now. FI''s not worried, but we''ve talked a little before about how he''ll be 39 when we get married, and we want some time together and to become more stable, but he also doesn''t want to wait that long before having a first child, because we hope to have a few. That would put him into his 40s also. He''s not concerned, and he''s very healthy and acts more like someone in his young 30s. I guess what I''m asking is, has your husband''s biological clock ticked at him any? Or does he ever express any questions or concerns over that? This really is just a curious question I wanted to bounce off you since we''re in similar situations. You don''t have to elaborate if you don''t want to.
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strawberries--We are in very similar situations, aren''t we? You''re right about the fact that the age difference isn''t really on my radar normally, sometimes I''m shocked to remember his actual age.

As for his biological clock, it hasn''t really made a peep yet, as far as I know. One thing I love most about my husband is that he doesn''t do anything *just because he should* and that, of course, seeps into the timing of having children. When we discuss when we plan to have kids our concerns are always focused on being ready emotionally and financially, and whether we are able to shift our entire lifestyle to raise children in the way we see as best.

At this point, he''s definitely going to be in his 40s, and I''lll be in my 30s when we start having children, and that is a-okay with both of us. I understand the very real concerns that come with being an *older* parent--health, lifespan, etc.--but it''s more important to us to simply be *ready* in a true-to-life way, rather than on paper. Yes, we''re secure in our careers, we own our home, we have a lot of savings, but that doesn''t mean we''re ready to be great parents right now.

I''m also enjoying being married and living together far too much to rush into any major changes in the near future!
 

lucyandroger

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Well I''m 24 and my biological clock ticking seems to come and go. Some days I just can''t wait to have a baby and some days I think how on earth are we ever going to make this work with a baby added to the mix...

SO and I have discussed it and we''re thinking that 2012 or 2013 would be when we''d like to start a family. Late twenties/ early thirties is when we always envisioned being parents.
 

anchor31

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Date: 4/23/2009 12:00:43 PM
Author: luvthemstrawberries

Date: 4/23/2009 8:09:07 AM
Author: anchor31
A lot earlier than I expected... I used to think ''no kids before 28-30'', but it kicked in recently and I''m 23 (24 in 2 weeks).
*Mini-Threadjack - Anchor, when''s your bday? Mine''s May 6!
lol Me too! Hey twinnie!
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I have a RL twin too.
 

anchor31

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Date: 4/24/2009 12:14:59 PM
Author: musey

Date: 4/23/2009 10:16:34 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie
Musey, I don''t know how long you have been married but I seem to think it is not too too long? I think getting married can be a real clock winding event for many women who always knew they would have kids.
Yep you''re right, about 6 months
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That''s what happened to me too. Before we got married, I used to say (and some people hear might remember) "oh, we''ll wait 3-ish years"... Right. I''ll be 9 months next week, and we "threw caution to the wind" for 2 months before officially starting to TTC this month.
 

snlee

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I have always known that I want to be a mom. Baby fever hit me pretty early - early twenties. DH and I held off having a baby until we were in our mid-twenties.
 

Burk

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Date: 4/24/2009 12:41:24 PM
Author: Haven
Date: 4/24/2009 9:02:27 AM

Author: luvthemstrawberries



Haven - I was just curious and wanted to ask you a question. Your husband is about the same age as my fiance (mine''s 38). I''m sure you, as I do (I''m almost 24), don''t see the age difference between you when you look at him and are around him. I know that more and more people are having babies in their 30s and 40s now anyway. But I was just curious if you guys have talked about that any in regards to him wanting to have kids by a certain age or anything. My FI has a stepbrother in his mid-40s who has one kid and a pregnant wife right now. FI''s not worried, but we''ve talked a little before about how he''ll be 39 when we get married, and we want some time together and to become more stable, but he also doesn''t want to wait that long before having a first child, because we hope to have a few. That would put him into his 40s also. He''s not concerned, and he''s very healthy and acts more like someone in his young 30s. I guess what I''m asking is, has your husband''s biological clock ticked at him any? Or does he ever express any questions or concerns over that? This really is just a curious question I wanted to bounce off you since we''re in similar situations. You don''t have to elaborate if you don''t want to.
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strawberries--We are in very similar situations, aren''t we? You''re right about the fact that the age difference isn''t really on my radar normally, sometimes I''m shocked to remember his actual age.


As for his biological clock, it hasn''t really made a peep yet, as far as I know. One thing I love most about my husband is that he doesn''t do anything *just because he should* and that, of course, seeps into the timing of having children. When we discuss when we plan to have kids our concerns are always focused on being ready emotionally and financially, and whether we are able to shift our entire lifestyle to raise children in the way we see as best.


At this point, he''s definitely going to be in his 40s, and I''lll be in my 30s when we start having children, and that is a-okay with both of us. I understand the very real concerns that come with being an *older* parent--health, lifespan, etc.--but it''s more important to us to simply be *ready* in a true-to-life way, rather than on paper. Yes, we''re secure in our careers, we own our home, we have a lot of savings, but that doesn''t mean we''re ready to be great parents right now.


I''m also enjoying being married and living together far too much to rush into any major changes in the near future!

Just want to say that I''m 27 and DH is 42 so I can totally relate to what you two are saying. My DH had no ticking of the clock WHATSOEVER. It was all me. I was the one who was ready and he was just like, "well, ok, I knew I wanted to do it some time." So, I don''t think age typically plays a part for men. And, like you guys I don''t even see DH''s age but sometimes he talks about how he wants to be retired in ten years and I''m like "what, why would we retire with kids in grade school??? What would we do?" And then remind him he needs to pretend he''s 27 again!
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KimberlyH

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Messages
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Date: 4/24/2009 9:02:27 AM
Author: luvthemstrawberries

Haven - I was just curious and wanted to ask you a question. Your husband is about the same age as my fiance (mine's 38). I'm sure you, as I do (I'm almost 24), don't see the age difference between you when you look at him and are around him. I know that more and more people are having babies in their 30s and 40s now anyway. But I was just curious if you guys have talked about that any in regards to him wanting to have kids by a certain age or anything. My FI has a stepbrother in his mid-40s who has one kid and a pregnant wife right now. FI's not worried, but we've talked a little before about how he'll be 39 when we get married, and we want some time together and to become more stable, but he also doesn't want to wait that long before having a first child, because we hope to have a few. That would put him into his 40s also. He's not concerned, and he's very healthy and acts more like someone in his young 30s. I guess what I'm asking is, has your husband's biological clock ticked at him any? Or does he ever express any questions or concerns over that? This really is just a curious question I wanted to bounce off you since we're in similar situations. You don't have to elaborate if you don't want to.
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luv, I'm not Haven but I am in a similar position to you, her, and Burk. DH is 40, I'm 31 and we've been married for 2.5 years. We want children and I have seen a shift in his desire to have kids more recently. He has some concerns regarding his age, but they are squelched by the fact that his mother was 47 and his dad 55 when he was born. His friends growing up all had older parents as well, so the age itself isn't what matters so much as being healthy and around for a long time. I often forget there is a 9 year age gap because he takes such good care of himself and is quite active, but his age does play a small role in our decision regarding when the right time will be for us.
 

IloveAsschers13

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Joined
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Messages
896
Date: 4/24/2009 12:14:59 PM
Author: musey
Date: 4/23/2009 10:16:34 PM

Author: dreamer_dachsie

Musey, I don't know how long you have been married but I seem to think it is not too too long? I think getting married can be a real clock winding event for many women who always knew they would have kids.

Yep you're right, about 6 months
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I'm willing to bet good money you won't make it 4 more years!
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I didn't!


And by the way... from the time I started asking questions like, 'How old were you when your biological clock kicked in?' until we were preggo was about 6 months.
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No!!!!!! I'm holding firm. My life would be completely different if I had them soon vs. 4+ years from now, and while I would accept and be happy about the sacrifices, it would be a disappointment on some level - I feel like I've worked too hard for too long to let it all go just yet.


Wow, I guess I just cleared it up in my head
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Thanks, dreamer!!

Musey- I always feel like you are SOOO much older than me, because you honestly sound SO WISE in your posts. I'm 21 (and a half haha if anyone's counting) and I have had baby fever for a while... It's not so much a baby fever thing as if I get pregnant *which would be pretty impossible we use 2 forms of BC everytime* I would keep it.

Me and my bf decided we are getting married in either 2012, or 2013 which makes us 24 or 25 and I wanted to start trying when I'm 26. My mom had me when she was 20, and let's just say she is soooo happy to have me, but she should have never gotten married to my dad. But hey, I wouldn't have my brother and sister right? And I would most likely be living in IL and never have met my BF... so sad to think about!

I just want to be a young mom. I want to be young when I start enjoying my life when my kids are older as well, like my mom, who is 42 and she is finally going to college and working since becoming a mom. My BF has no inclination to be a father right now though, which is a good thing I think! But a funny story about that-

My boss taped her births and this other girl I work with (I work at a daycare) watched it for some reason, I think for a class or something or maybe she was just interested? (I know, a little weird, but I would probably watch it too, after hearing all the birth stories month after month on the Mommies thread). So anyways I told my BF about it and he said, "EWE gross! The only birth I will ever be watching is yours!!!" and of course my heart went all mushy and I said," AWWWWWW."
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But another thing about motherhood for me is this: I'm completely prepared to be a mother, I swear! I have babysat for soooo many children and have seriously experienced so much when it comes to kids, I feel like I can handle anything. Honestly. I know some of you are thinking yeah, right, but really. I have babysat a week old baby for two nights overnight, and it was not easy, but great experience! So now I just want a baby of my own that I carried in my own belly, when the time is right!!
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
33,852
Date: 4/22/2009 8:59:46 PM
Author:musey
If applicable, of course
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I''ve always wanted to have kids ''someday,'' but never felt the urge to do it ''now.'' That''s been coming on rather strong lately, even though I know intellectually that I am not ready and do not want them yet (we have at least 4 years to go, which I''m sure will fly by in the end)... emotionally I''m just beginning to have a little conflict. My husband has been feeling the same way, too.


How old were you, or at what stage of life were you (newly married, graduating school, settled in a good job, etc.) when you first noticed it kicking in?
27 newly married. glad we had both kids before wife and i turn 30.
 

vetrik

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Sep 6, 2008
Messages
140
Date: 4/22/2009 9:29:00 PM
Author: fieryred33143
Mr. Fiery's came at around 25 (He's 30 now)


I'm still waiting for mine to kick in hahaha


Ditto for me and my DH, exactly!

I'll be 29 this year, and I'm due in July with our first baby. We'll be married 5 years next month, and we have owned our house for 3 years. We did try to get pregnant, and I'm ready, happy and excited to be having a baby. However, I don't feel like my biological clock had really kicked in and I could easily have waited a couple more years if DH had felt the same way.

It's funny - I did always want to be pregnant, I was just never ready for the baby that came at the end of it! I am enjoying being pregnant - I've always wanted to experience the baby moving, and that is definitely my favorite part. I'm also looking forward to everything we can do as the baby grows up, making new memories and traditions as a family.
 
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