How much did your wedding cost?

[HopeDream]

I got married last June (2012) for about 15k for about 65 guests. We got married in Stanley Park in Vancouver (a pricey area for weddings). I tried to do it as cheaply as possible without sacrificing quality. We dod our best to spend on things I knew our guests would enjoy and tried not to worry about anything I didn't think our guests would care about. We saved for 2 years to pay for it (We were students at the time).

What we spent on:
Harpist for the ceremony
Lovely flowers for the ceremony
Passed Canapes
Plated Lunch in a restaurant
an amazing wedding cake
a photobooth
a great photographer
a great videographer
a carnival band (instead of a DJ)
nice gifts for the wedding party

What we saved on:
second-hand wedding dress
discounted bridesmaid's dresses
homemade invitations
homemade wedding favours
homemade veil and wedding jewels
homemade centerpeices
the cheapest rental chairs for the ceremony
our Officiant was a family friend
wedding bands from ebay/eweddingbands.com
almost no decor - eg. no chaircovers etc.
Having the wedding in the morning followed by lunch

 

[webdiva]

I'm really proud that i was able to pull off a fun, beautiful wedding on a budget! Our goal was for our guests and us to have fun and great food! Hubby and I set the budget a year in advance and split the costs. About $5k for just under 50 people (in early 2011), with the entire weekend totaling about $6k for a fun Friday rehearsal BBQ taco cart party (catered) in a rented tent with rental tables, chairs and covers in our backyard, gorgeous Saturday evening wedding at a museum with a sitdown dinner (top sirloin, salmon, stuffed chicken) and Sunday brunch in the backyard tent. We DIYed flowers, cake, centerpieces, the venue was super cheap and included rentals and we only paid $9/pp for four hours of unlimited custom champagne and St. Germaine cocktails that matched our theme (I also made cute custom swizzle sticks). Dress was $299 at a wedding outlet, but Mom paid for it and my BFF did the bustle and sewed in pink tulle under the skirt for the pics. Got a daily deal for hair and makeup (which I loved!!!). DJ was free, a friend of hubby's volunteered - we made up a music list with themes (mellow music during dinner, etc) and did a run through before the wedding. I found the officiant on Craigslist. I found our photog on one of my fave blogs and he only charged $599 since he was relatively new to weddings. He was fantastic and is now charging more than five times that and booked a year in advance!

I had an excel sheet with all expenses and a project plan with hour by hour tasks for that day - all of my friends and family were so happy to be included and knew what to do while we took pictures before the ceremony. It helped manage the stress! The excel sheet helped me prioritize what was important to us and keep track of extras that can spiral out of control. I'm not the type that dreamt of my wedding my whole life, so hubby and I kept it low budge but very fun and representative of us. We all had so much fun and everyone still talks about it to this day! My pictures look like something from a wedding blog and I love looking at them! Everything turned out so great! I spent about six months ahead of time planning and making decorations. For example, I made cake plates out of candlesticks and plates from Goodwill, where I also scored some of the vases. My only regret is not steaming the linens! LOL

Beecushion, I advise future brides to look for DIY ideas on budget wedding blogs, shop around like crazy and stay away from those crazy wedding magazines! It can loom expensive without being expensive! PS has a DIY thread! [URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/the-big-diy-thread.106303/page-4']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/the-big-diy-thread.106303/page-4[/URL]

 

[justginger]

We had two weddings, one in Australia and one in the States, in 2011. We paid for everything ourselves, so budgeting was really important to me.

By some miraculous grace of God, I managed to get a small boutique winery/tea house that had only done one wedding before (their own daughter's) to agree to do our wedding for a mere $40/head, plus drinks package of $10 each. It was flat out robbery on my part - every other winery in the area charges $100-120 for food only, and another $35/head for drinks! Funny though...after our wedding they put together proper reception packages and they're 2-3 times as much as what we paid.

We managed to scrape in our Australian wedding around $12k total (average Perth wedding is about $30k), and the one in the States was about $8k. So both for $20k, which we were pleased with.

 

[gammygam]

A big cost saver for us was having a Sunday brunch instead of a Saturday night wedding. In retrospect, I regret feeling obligated to have a big wedding (120+) people for 20k in the Midwest.

I planned the wedding in 4 months, it would have cost about 4-5k less if we didn't have to have wedding planners. Long story but the gist of it is my MIL didn't like our dessert caterer and exchanged words/tried to cancel after we paid a hefty deposit! I would say my wedding planners were absolutely vital to my and DH's sanity.

Areas we cut back on: I bought my dress from preownedweddingdresses.com and it was brand new! From 7500 retail to $1800. Cut back on invites, favors and did floating flower center pieces. Our venue, photographer and videographer all had special discounted rates for Sunday.

Areas we splurged on: fancy cocktail hour and food for brunch with premium open bar. A videographer because my grandmother was unable to attend and our photographer is one of the best. Also a fancy veil because I just had to have one!

As a side note, I totally think its funny that we PSers don't consider our e-rings to be part of the wedding budget! Or at least, doesn't seem that way from responses!

 

[monarch64]

We eloped. Best decision ever...we had spent about 10 months of our engagement going back and forth over whether we should have a traditional wedding or just go away somewhere and get married just the two of us. Romanticism prevailed, and we couldn't have been happier with our decision. We kept it under $2k, and it was several days of total bliss spent on a beach/in a hotel room/traveling around the "island."

I had been married once before, and had a somewhat grand affair for which my parents paid. I think back in 2003, it cost somewhere around $30k, and that was in the suburbs of Chicago, I think 100 guests was the final count. I remember a lot of quibbling between the in-laws over cheese trays and nonsense, and a lot of stress over groomsmens' tuxes and bridesmaids' gowns, and silly generalities like open bars, how to keep costs down, etc. My aunt made our invitations, I chose a gown that was fairly inexpensive (under $1k with almost no alterations--I was lucky to be young and a sample size back then), and I found my dream location but we did the wedding on a Sunday so it was half the price of what a Saturday or Friday affair would've cost. Needless to say, we divorced just 5 years later. We skimped on...um, we didn't skimp. Oh, I don't think we had a videographer, but that was it. There was definitely concern on the part of my ex-in-laws over things being done "right" according to what was protocol for the area, which amazed me (and my family) as they weren't paying for any of it. Looking back, it was all just very strange.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

We eloped in Vegas, so I am not sure what we spent bc I still bought a dress/shoes, etc, and those all added up and I didn't tally them.

It was almost entirely stress free and that was our objective.

The only regret I have is we didn't hire a better photographer. We had to basically have a relative do a photo shoot to avoid hurting feelings of another relative. He didn't do a good job on the photos - which were just photos of my DH and I after we were married. If I had known the outcome, We would have had a second photographer do photos for us. It is interesting that a friend of mine hired a photographer for her pricey wedding, but used a photo from a family member as the picture for her thank-you cards.

 

[perry]

Cost of wedding last year not including Prince and Princess rings: Just under $4000 for about 30 guests

This included all cost for dress, shoes, flowers, incidentals, rental of resort location with a sandy beach on a lake, overnight rental of corner condo unit with stunning view and facilities, great reception meal in the resort restaurant (Veggie & appetizer trays for each table - then everyone ordered from the menu, cost of all drinks, special chocolate cake desert for all), professional photographer, officiant, marriage license, half dozen copies of marriage certificate, etc, etc, etc (I even rented a wheel chair for my mother to get her to the beach).

Perry

 

[rosetta]

Alright I'll admit it, before DF outs me...

Mine was 100k+. Out parents paid a lot of it, but we chucked in a few thousand as well. It's tradition in my culture that parents pay for everything, so they wouldn't hear of it otherwise. I had three weddings: one very small religious ceremony with only the ten members of my immediate family in a very expensive hotel suite (we had fans at the door, as lady gaga was staying in the suite next door that night, they probably thought I was part of her weird entourage ) a UK wedding (which is on 3 different vendor blogs and in a national wedding magazine and my then fledgling wedding planner now plans celebrity weddings) and a huge wedding back home with 400+ guests.

I loved every second of it. We wouldn't be able to afford it without our parents' help (I would have spent the ££ on bling obviously!) and they were absolutely thrilled to do so. We are both their oldest children, so they were practically dying to have a huge shindig. Not one single member of my far flung extended family missed my wedding, which to me is priceless.

Does anyone need a big wedding? No, it's all just a big excuse for a party. I had SO MUCH FUN though. I wouldn't have changed a single thing, especially the groom. I had the very intimate wedding, and the black tie event, and the chaotic Asian party. My marriage is awesome (touch wood, spit spit spit) but I'll never have such a fantastic knees up again!

You have to do what feels right to YOU.

 

[yennyfire]

Another thread and an upcoming friend's wedding has me thinking about wedding costs. So, how much did yours cost? For the engaged, how much do you think yours will cost? Please also tell us how many guests, and when you were married so we can adjust for inflation.

I was married in 2004. We had less than 30 guests. We paid for everything ourselves. Total cost for ceremony, cocktails and nibbles, open bar, plated dinner, cake, flowers, dress, rings (not e-ring), and photography was around $10,000. We didn't do a dance.

My wedding was in 2006 in Hawaii and cost about $10,000 for what is bolded above.

I can join this club! My wedding (10+ years ago!) was in a B&B in the North Georgia mountains in January (so, off season). We had about 35 guests and we did do a dance (we found a really cool "duo" who managed to sound like a small band). It was the best night of my life (along with the days my kids were born) and DH and I still drag out the photos every year on our anniversary. One of my cousins did the video (he's semi-prof.) and we've never looked at it....

 

[stargurl78]

We got married in June 2009 and it was around $22K for 140 guests. It was a great day but if I could do it again, our invite list would be cut in half. Our parents covered more than half of the cost and DH and I put in the rest (which we made back in gifts from guests). We splurged on the photographer and the church ( I had to get married in one of the big beautiful historic churches in our area) but we were pretty conservative for everything else.

 

[rubybeth]

We got married August 8, 2008, 50 guests at a Catholic ceremony, and a fancy restaurant reception with no dance, for around $5,000 in the midwest. My mom and dad paid for close to $4,000 of it, and DH and I paid the rest, around $1k. My parents appreciated us having a smaller wedding than most of my cousins have had, and were fine with not inviting all of the extended family. It was grandparents, godparents, and cousins and friends who lived in-state. We had plenty of time to talk to everyone who attended. We had a couple generous family members who helped in various ways, with music, tailoring, wine, chauffeuring, etc. People still mention the Mediterranean meal options from our wedding as being the best they ever had at a wedding, especially the tiramisu for dessert instead of wedding cake.

 

[gem_anemone]

Ours was a little over $16K for 150 people not including rings.

 

[bluebirrrd]

Fun hearing about all your weddings, especially yours rosetta!

We were married in 2010 at the coast in a private garden. There were only the two of us, a friend serving as officiant and two other friends serving as witnesses. We paid for everyone's stay at a beautiful lodge and had the BEST most relaxing, romantic, fun time. We had Mexican wedding cookies instead of a cake, homemade bouquets, and lots of other very personal but inexpensive details. It was a beautiful, memorable weekend but far from traditional and we got some flack from the families ahead of time. The whole shebang was less than $2,000 and it was perfect! The families have recovered.

 

[Elmorton]

About 30-35k for a Midwest outdoor wedding and indoor reception in 2007 for 120 guests , and a church ceremony 2 weeks later with about 30-50. My parents paid for the majority; what DH's family contributed covered rehearsal and honeymoon, mostly.The crazy thing is that I never felt we splurged - we were so conscious of not going crazy with my parents' carte blanche (I am an only). We had a buffet, iPod instead of DJ, minimal flowers, very basic decor (I DIYed center pieces and all printed items except invitations, no fancy linens, etc) wine and beer but not open bar, smallish bridal party. My dress was about 1k after alterations. But things add up quickly, especially when neither venue is an actual "wedding" location (park and theater/arts center). We had extra costs like chair rental because of that..and we did go quality/more expensive for photographer, ceremony musicians, food, and cake - and I don't regret a bit of that! In the midst of all the planning, there came a point where I didn't think it was worth it...but when I walked down the aisle and saw all my family and friends in one place, I realized that money couldn't have been better spent.

 

[armywife13]

We were married in 2008 and spent about $100. At that time we were not communicating with my family, so we had a courthouse wedding with just a handful of friends and my husband's father and sister attending. The $100 covered my outfit, the fee for the magistrate and marriage certificate. If we were to do a wedding now, it would probably have a budget closer to $5000-$10000 for a simple dress, ceremony at the church, and a small reception with our friends and family.

 

[yssie]

DH's family is Jewish and mine is Hindu, and our wedding was a big family event on both sides! We couldn't find a way to combine both religions and cultures into a single celebration without bulldozing through some fundamental tenets on both sides so we had two separate ceremonies. Which basically equates to planning and paying for two weddings!

My parents very generously arranged the Hindu ceremony. DH's parents helped with most of the Jewish ceremony/rehearsals/events for out of town guests, and their wedding gift to us was our honeymoon. We had family/friends do the photography, flowers, ceremony music, the bridesmaids chose their own dresses, I did my own makeup... The one thing we didn't cut any corners on was the food. All in all I think the whole thing was probably ~50k for both ceremonies for ~200 people - my parents still love talking about it

 

[vc10um]

We spent about $9500 for 85 people in Kansas City, MO in 2011. That doesn't include rings, honeymoon, dress (my mother considered that a separate gift), or flights/accommodations for myself and now-DH while we were in KC. That does include our amazing photographer, both venues, our deeeeeelicious food (Jack Stack BBQ, for those of you who have been to Kansas City ), our fabulous DJ, and all paper products, decor, and flowers (ordered online as a package from bridesign.com). I am SO glad that we didn't skimp on our photographer but that we passed on a videographer. The still images speak volumes!

We had a second reception in DC for our coworkers/local friends. That was about $1K for a casual get-together in the party room/pub of a friends' apartment building.

 

[Smith1942]

I got married in my own country, the UK, in 2006. My parents paid for every single thing and my dad said he wasn't going to add it up, so I have no idea how much it was.

I'm anti-weddings for myself, although I quite like attending the weddings of others if that's what makes them happy. I would have been happy with zero wedding, just going to an officiant's office and signing some papers. I had a wedding because my ultra-conservative parents were DESPERATE for it, and I didn't care either way. I was about to leave them in their old age and emigrate 3,000 miles away forever, and also Mum had been ill, so I basically did it for them.

We had about 83 guests for the day, and an additional 20-30 in the evening. We had a wedding at a modern non-denominational church on a university campus where my dad taught for 45 years and where I did my MA. We had the university choir. Then we had a champagne reception at one of the largest hotels in town, in the same room where my sister had her reception in 1996, followed by sit-down dinner. Then there was a band for the evening, and an evening buffet. We had a photographer and a videographer, and a vintage car, plus other limousines for the wedding party. I had two adult attendants and two kiddie attendants. We had a children's entertainer who had all the kids in a separate room and amused them during the dinner and speeches - good move on my parents' part. I think the kids had goodie bags too. I cannot even remember if we had an open bar, or what the song was we danced to. Something I'd never heard of that my husband chose.

What a horrendous waste of money the whole thing was. My parents had nothing handed to them, they worked hard for every penny and I just cannot believe that they so desperately wanted to blow so much on a single day, for someone who wasn't even bothered. It was basically a favour I did them. Isn't that weird? The whole situation was weird, though, because I was living at home with them in the UK and my husband was living in the USA. We had a cheap honeymoon in the Seychelles, weird 3-star place with not much food, then he had to return to the US and I returned to live with my parents for another 10 months before my green card came. Had we actually been living near each other, and had I not been with my parents at that time, things might have been different.

Like Monarch64, I also remember lots of squabbling. My mother was horrified at having the same buttonhole as my husband's mother. I ordered them from the florist and never did I dream that my mum would be difficult about something like that. My mother's wedding outfit cost the same as my dress, which for reasons I don't understand, annoyed me. I had three single friends become very bitchy towards me because I was getting married, including one who insulted me behind my back to my guests on my wedding day. I only speak to one of those now - not that one -and it has taken years to repair things with her. Even my best friend, also single, stayed away from me during the months before the wedding. It certainly wasn't because I talked about the wedding too much - I couldn't have cared less about it! I also received many, many unwanted, invasive, personal remarks about having babies, mostly from people I worked with but some from my MIL too. That has continued throughout my marriage, but I totally ignore them. However, it's not a nice thing to do to an engaged woman. I think it was just a way of getting at the bride - some people are very jealous.

Oh yes - I also got stuck with 100 per cent of the work. My husband was living in America and my parents buggered off on a four-month cruise, so Muggins got to spend every evening for three months administrating the wedding, getting the requisite three quotes for everything, emailing each supplier about all the details, confirming everything, making payments etc. On the bright side, working full-time, running a house and doing the wedding, all with zero help, was the making of my organisational skills.

As Monarch 64 said, looking back, the whole thing was incredibly strange. People close to me exhibited a lot of bizarre behaviour that I would never have thought they were capable of. It seemed to bring out the worst in a lot of people around me, and I'm sorry I had to see that side of them. The good thing is that I'll never have to go through anything like that again!


Things I didn't have:

No wedding planner
No make-up artist
No bridal shower
No bachelorette party
No engagement party - although we did have an engagement lunch at a nice restaurant with immediate family only, paid by my MIL.
No Master of Ceremonies
No save-the-date cards
No favours
No receiving line
I cannot even remember what we did for centrepieces - perhaps nothing, perhaps flowers. I really don't know.

When I read about the home-made weddings on here that people did on a shoestring, they sound really personal and fun - not to mention sensible. If I were to have a daughter, my ideal wedding for her would be a summer wedding at home, in our future large garden, about 40-50 people, doing the food ourselves, making the centerpieces, but hiring people to serve the food. I imagine an intimate family day. In the UK most people don't have the space for that and the weather is totally unreliable, but in the US you could have a lovely at-home celebration without all the clobber.

 

[BriBee]

Thanks for all the info everyone, this is great! (Sorry for the threadjack JaneSmith).
I love reading about everyone's different experiences and creative ideas! I definitely think we will save money on invites, STDs, wedding programs etc. Brother and FSIL did email STDs with paperless post which were really cute. I'm also lucky that FMIL is AMAZING with cakes...works with fondant and beautiful sugar creations, the whole nine yards. So she will do our cake for free and I have a close friend who owns a flower business, and I think my flowers will be free, or very cheap. My venue also comes with a lot of things included (hurricane centerpieces, linens, dishes, bartenders, servers, etc...) and the cost to rent is very reasonable compared to other things I've looked at. I think we'll scrap the videographer, but I'm still debating about the photographer. I definitely want to go with a pro for SOME time at the wedding...I'll just have to see who can work with our budget. We also want to get a photobooth for everyone to use. I think it's a fun idea, they come with lots of costumes and props, and we are thinking of doing that in lieu of favors.

 

[VRBeauty]

When I read about the home-made weddings on here that people did on a shoestring, they sound really personal and fun - not to mention sensible. If I were to have a daughter, my ideal wedding for her would be a summer wedding at home, in our future large garden, about 40-50 people, doing the food ourselves, making the centerpieces, but hiring people to serve the food. I imagine an intimate family day. In the UK most people don't have the space for that and the weather is totally unreliable, but in the US you could have a lovely at-home celebration without all the clobber.

Smith1942, I have to admit that I laughed at the juxtoposition of your feelings about the wedding your mother foisted on you, and your musings about the wedding you would like your daughter to have, if you have a daughter. Of course I know that there's a vast distance between the musing and the foisting, and I'm not suggesting that you would ever resort to foisting, but it still...

 

[Smith1942]

Well, I suppose I was really describing the kind of wedding I now wish I'd had myself, now that I live in a country with the right weather and land.

Don't worry, having been on the receiving end of so much foisting, I am determined not to foist on my own kids! My parents are pretty much along the lines of: everyone should get married and everyone should have kids and everyone should be religious. I don't agree with any of that - unless it's actually what people want.

 

[distracts]

Getting married in ~2 weeks, 170 guests attending, the wedding will be approximately 35k. If you include rings, rehearsal dinner, groom's bespoke tux (cost over 4x what my dress cost), and honeymoon the cost would double. My parents are paying for that first part and my fiance and I are paying for that second part.

Our problem with spending was that the things my fiance and I prioritized (photography, intimate guest list, heavy appetizers/light dinner) were diametrically opposed to what my parents prioritized (invite ALL THE PEOPLE, big dinner, flowers). So all the compromises somehow involved spending more money. I have never, ever seen my mother prioritize "keeping up with the Joneses" before but with this wedding she wants to outdo everyone. It's funny because my mom is usually the opposite of materialistic. She tried to invite like twenty of her friends that I had NEVER EVEN HEARD OF and I had to draw the line at that. Friends of hers that I also know? Okay. Friends of hers that I have never met or even heard her mention? Not okay.

We did a lot of shopping around for invitations we liked that were reasonably priced and ended up getting them from a shop on Etsy. For the save-the-dates, invitation suites, envelopes, and postage, it was less than $800 for 100 of each. I have a cousin who spent like 4k on paper goods which I cannot imagine.

The one thing I would recommend is to save on is to find a dress off the rack. My bridal salon experience has been a nightmare. It was supposedly ordered in my custom measurements, but even AFTER alterations if I move at all my boobs pop out. So I have to call and yell at the alterations lady because that is NOT OKAY. I don't even have big boobs but the top is just so loose. My dress is beautiful but after $1200 on the dress and $400 on alterations, you'd think it would fit! And of course it came in a month later than I said I needed it in/they said it would get in, so there's very little time for alterations.

The thing I'd recommend to splurge on is the wedding planner. My head would have exploded without her. I am definitely in the stage of planning where I give up. I was supposed to go do bridal portraits across the state today but I have a 102F fever and had to call my photographer to cancel. Sad sad sad. Our photographer is also amazing. He wasn't too expensive - about average price, but has his pictures in museums and stuff and is definitely way higher than average quality. He did fiance's bff's wedding about five years ago.

I also have no idea how people do DIY. I have simply had no time. The one thing I sort of DIYed - gluing envelope liners in the envelopes - took me 7 hours and left me crying.

 

[Smith1942]

Getting married in ~2 weeks, 170 guests attending, the wedding will be approximately 35k. If you include rings, rehearsal dinner, groom's bespoke tux (cost over 4x what my dress cost), and honeymoon the cost would double. My parents are paying for that first part and my fiance and I are paying for that second part.

Our problem with spending was that the things my fiance and I prioritized (photography, intimate guest list, heavy appetizers/light dinner) were diametrically opposed to what my parents prioritized (invite ALL THE PEOPLE, big dinner, flowers). So all the compromises somehow involved spending more money. I have never, ever seen my mother prioritize "keeping up with the Joneses" before but with this wedding she wants to outdo everyone. It's funny because my mom is usually the opposite of materialistic. She tried to invite like twenty of her friends that I had NEVER EVEN HEARD OF and I had to draw the line at that. Friends of hers that I also know? Okay. Friends of hers that I have never met or even heard her mention? Not okay.

We did a lot of shopping around for invitations we liked that were reasonably priced and ended up getting them from a shop on Etsy. For the save-the-dates, invitation suites, envelopes, and postage, it was less than $800 for 100 of each. I have a cousin who spent like 4k on paper goods which I cannot imagine.

The one thing I would recommend is to save on is to find a dress off the rack. My bridal salon experience has been a nightmare. It was supposedly ordered in my custom measurements, but even AFTER alterations if I move at all my boobs pop out. So I have to call and yell at the alterations lady because that is NOT OKAY. I don't even have big boobs but the top is just so loose. My dress is beautiful but after $1200 on the dress and $400 on alterations, you'd think it would fit! And of course it came in a month later than I said I needed it in/they said it would get in, so there's very little time for alterations.

The thing I'd recommend to splurge on is the wedding planner. My head would have exploded without her. I am definitely in the stage of planning where I give up. I was supposed to go do bridal portraits across the state today but I have a 102F fever and had to call my photographer to cancel. Sad sad sad. Our photographer is also amazing. He wasn't too expensive - about average price, but has his pictures in museums and stuff and is definitely way higher than average quality. He did fiance's bff's wedding about five years ago.

I also have no idea how people do DIY. I have simply had no time. The one thing I sort of DIYed - gluing envelope liners in the envelopes - took me 7 hours and left me crying.

Congratulations on your forthcoming wedding, Distracts! It sounds as if it will be just beautiful. Where are you going on your honeymoon? I agree that your dress should fit properly. Boobs popping out is definitely not OK!

I was amused to read at the change in your mum with the wedding stuff. Mine too! She was always so accepting of others, and then she got really competitive about the wedding stuff and ever since I got married has been growling at me like a wild animal to reproduce to her timetable! It's like - dude, relax! Live and let live a little, you know??

I also laughed at your description of attempts to DIY. I think that sort of thing takes a long time and you have to be really into it - and yes, some people have much more of an affinity for craft-making than others!

 

[KaeKae]

We were married in 1989, and I remember thinking we did it all for under $5k, when others were doing it for $10k or so. I'm not sure where I got that statistic, though. The $5k included everything but my dress, which was a gift from my aunt and uncle, and our honeymoon, which I wouldn't have thought to include in the total, though clearly that's a related expense.

 

[aviastar]

Married 2012, at home, 30 guests for around 5-6k and a BBQ reception a few months later for 200 for about 3K.

I don't actually feel like my experience is a good reference point, however- we're very lucky to have talented and generous friends and family. Our photography was a gift, flowers were a gift- we only paid the wholesale cost of the flowers themselves, cake was a gift, hair and makeup- you guessed it- gift. Our caterer was not a gift, but she is a family friend who only accepts about 10 events a year and works out of her home, so we got three courses including a prime rib main for about $30/head. And we basically DIY'd the invites, place settings, decor, music, we built farm tables, no linens. We did have to rent chairs.

The biggest expense and only reason we topped 2k at all was that we decided to take our venue/decor budget and sink it into my parent's property; we did much of the work ourselves, but sod and plants are expensive and it added up quickly. The improvements were for me and my wedding, but in the long term, my parents have about an acre (they have 12 total) of improved yard, complete with perennial beds and a wildflower meadow-not a bad trade off. We split the total cost of the wedding with my parents and planned it in 5 months.

We paid for the separate reception ourselves. Catered BBQ, bar, Pick Your Own flowers, Costco cakes; very casual and very fun!

I wouldn't change any of it, it was perfect for us!

 

[bunnycat]

These have been a lot of fun to read. I think everyone seemed to find a way to make their budget work for them to make a great day for themselves.

SMith's account of her wedding planning is everything I feared about planning a wedding, but thankfully was not the way at all that ours went. Both of us wanted it to be as stress free as possible. Since we paid for it, I think that was part of why it was relatively low stress (for a wedding). Had all the family needed to be placated due to funding it, I doubt it would have been as easy as it was. (And it was still tons of work that I don't ever want to do again!)

I think one of the smartest things I read when we started planning it out was to write down your most basic minimal must haves and then add on from there. It's a lot harder to remove items on the list once your mind is set on it, but easy to add on if there's spare funds in the estimate once your "must haves" are covered. So I printed off this huge list of things you are "supposed" to do for a wedding and just started saying yes, no, no, hell no, no, sure, ok, maybe, no, yes....(the hell no was for horse-drawn carriage...talk about the difference between the ideal wedding day for a 20 something versus a 40 something!)

 

[JaneSmith]

Thanks for all the info everyone, this is great! (Sorry for the threadjack JaneSmith).
I love reading about everyone's different experiences and creative ideas! I definitely think we will save money on invites, STDs, wedding programs etc. Brother and FSIL did email STDs with paperless post which were really cute. I'm also lucky that FMIL is AMAZING with cakes...works with fondant and beautiful sugar creations, the whole nine yards. So she will do our cake for free and I have a close friend who owns a flower business, and I think my flowers will be free, or very cheap. My venue also comes with a lot of things included (hurricane centerpieces, linens, dishes, bartenders, servers, etc...) and the cost to rent is very reasonable compared to other things I've looked at. I think we'll scrap the videographer, but I'm still debating about the photographer. I definitely want to go with a pro for SOME time at the wedding...I'll just have to see who can work with our budget. We also want to get a photobooth for everyone to use. I think it's a fun idea, they come with lots of costumes and props, and we are thinking of doing that in lieu of favors.

Not a threadjack! No need to apologise!
Get a good photographer, get lots of pictures. I love my wedding photos. They are the only thing I really have to keep from my wedding. Obviously, I have kept the husband too, he he!
My wedding photos are the only professional shots of me looking young and somewhat pretty. I'm sure I'll be glad to have them when I'm old and wrinkly! If I have any grandchildren they might want to see what I looked like and what the styles were in the olden days. I know I like to see old family photos.
As for a video, we just borrowed a camcorder with a decent mic (one that can handle a bit of wind), set it up on a tripod pointed at where we would say our vows, and got someone to hit record before we walked in. I've watched it a few times, and it will be cool to show my daughter. It was also nice to give a copy to family who could not attend.

 

[chrono]

Under $1000 for the courthouse and a small private dinner for immediate family members and extremely close friends. No bar, new dresses, flowers, professional photographer and all that. Of course, tradition dictates a second more formal wedding with the whole nine yards but given that it was done in Asia, it was very inexpensive to book the entire floor of the restaurant, rent the dress and etc. plus we received cash (again, this is traditional and expected) to offset the cost of the occasion.