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How long did you wait to start planning?

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musey

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Sep 30, 2006
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11,242
I've only been engaged (!) for two days, and of course all those weeks spent in the LIW have created some pent-up wedding planning energy! I think FI was hoping the questions (from other people, not me) would calm down after getting engaged, not pick up! So now we're being asked "when/where is the wedding?" all the time, but haven't even thought about setting a date yet. Well, I have
but I'm trying to give him some adjustment time.

My question is, how long should I wait before I start asking him planning questions myself? --Assuming that we're not rushing to get married, I'm thinking it will probably be sometime summer/fall 2008. I want to give him time to adjust, but I don't want to put it off for too long!


Thoughts? Experiences? Advisories?
 

AmberWaves

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Oct 19, 2005
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3,672
Well, we got engaged March 31, 2006. The wedding date was set a few weeks later (Nov. 3, 2007) and then I took a break. Until June, when I booked our reception.
So, after the inital date making, we made up a few mock guest lists, and then we took a two month break- and started planning and saving full force.

btw: Congrats on your engagement! And WELCOME!
 

indecisive

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 9, 2005
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1,240
We got engaged at the end of April and we started very casually looking at reception locations after we graduated. We just booked a location and officially set the date yesterday(!!!) so it took us a while. If I was you I would start looking at locations now as they book up quick. I live in Northern VA and most wedding places already have a lot of bookings for spring/summer 2008. If you are really flexible or want a non-holiday Sunday then you can wait awhile but if not you might want to go look around! Have fun and congrats again!
 

ephemery1

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 20, 2006
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1,724
We got engaged in June of 2006 (after 3.5 years together) but already had our venue booked for May 5, 2007 (we did that even before getting engaged since we knew the hotel books up fast!)... so that gave us an 11 month engagement.

I started researching a little right away, but saved all the big stuff for August (since I had a month break from classes). We did photographer first, then my dress/BM dresses and flowers... we put off finding a band until October, which ended up being stressful... many we liked were already booked by then!

There was a lull for a while (Nov-Jan) but now I am back at it in full force... invitations, food-tasting, favors, etc. We know a lot of other couples planning weddings right now, and the feeling I keep having is "Thank GOD we are having ours in the beginning of the season, rather than dragging out the planning all spring and summer!" It will be so much nicer to just enjoy all the other weddings we''ll be attending, rather than worrying about ours simultaneously. Choosing the May date was definitely the best decision we''ve made so far, even though these 11 months are going REALLY REALLY quickly!!!
 

dani13

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2004
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6,183
Congratulations on your engagement!!!


We were engaged on 11/11/05, and waited till this past summer to book our reception site, since we knew that the wedding would not be until the fall of ''07. The wait was due to both mine and my FI''s grad school schedule- we just knew we couldnt pull off a wedding within the year. We were not in a rush- and it actually worked out better, b/c we have had plenty of time to save $$!

We booked our reception site in July, and I started working on more things in November, and now I am just doing everything slowly. Its so nice to be able to take your time and enjoy every step of the planning- I am really loving it! Our wedding is 9/28/07, and we can''t wait!

Good luck!
 

E B

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 31, 2005
Messages
9,488
We were engaged November 6th, 2005. I was secretly finding things I liked here and there, but we didn''t actually BOOK anything until June of 2006 (our ceremony/reception sites).

Since then, we''ve done very little else and we''re getting married in 7.5 months! I''m going to try to book the photographer this weekend, and then the caterer next month. I already have a florist and hair/makeup artist. I should also order my dress at the end of this month.
 

nytemist

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 11, 2005
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962
We had discussed a date before getting engaged and had already decided on Halloween. We got engaged Feb 8th, 2006 (wow can''t believe that was a year ago!!!!) and we really didn''t start planning things until mid March or so. That''s when we went to look at the place where we had the wedding. I really didn''t start doing more planning until roughly May. Our wedding was so small and we didn''t do a lot of the little things, so we didn''t have a whole lot to plan.

it''s completely up to you two. Once you both feel more settled about being engaged, that'' the time to start talking dates and details. Trust me, you will feel it when your ready
 

Pandora II

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 3, 2006
Messages
9,613
I got engaged on Christmas Eve 2006. Booked the venue the 3rd week in January and the registrar last week. My wedding date is 26th July 2008. I thought I was being very premature in getting my bookings in so early but...

My venue only has 4 Saturdays available in the summer and I know that only 1 is now left for 2008 (I got first choice because I was so paranoid I rang from 2nd Jan onwards!) - you can''t marry on Sundays in the UK so that really narrows choices down and our families live all over the UK so a weekday was a no no.

When I rang the registrar I got my first choice of time - 3.00pm and a firm provisional booking that I have to firm up after the 26th July 2007. They then told me that they already had six other bookings for that date!
If they book up, then you can''t get married - If you are having a venue wedding rather than their office you have to have 2 registrars there and I believe they only have 10 on any one day.

I had a look at a few of the UK''s answer to the Knot and discovered loads of summer/autumn 2008 brides have booked everything - even the dress
and others are finding that photographers/bands are already booked up.

My feeling is: If you desperately want a particular venue/church/band/photographer you need to book early. If you''re very flexible/budget isn''t an issue then you can afford to wait plenty of time.
 

RoseAngel04

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jun 8, 2006
Messages
865
We started planning right after our engagement. It wasn''t like the next day, but within a few days I started researching ideas etc. Within the first few weeks to a month we set the date. I found and bought my dress 2 1/2 weeks after our engagement!
 

FireGoddess

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 25, 2005
Messages
12,145
I started planning right away. We got engaged in November, and wanted to get married outdoors so we had to plan it within the non-rainy season...which left a max of 10 months from when we got engaged! I started researching potential venues on my own, and when I got an idea of a timeframe I brought it up to him.
 

firebirdgold

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 30, 2005
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2,216
It took us a couple of months to really be firm on the date and another couple of months to pick and book the location. And this is despite the fact that I had A) Picked 3 possible dates and already decided I liked March best. and B) Already picked the location as my favorite.
I just wanted to make sure it was a mutual decision.
 

Officers girl

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jan 16, 2007
Messages
218
Weve been engaged for quite some time but he has just now been home long enough to set a date and begin planning I think like ten months out is good. But to be honest I started planning when I was like 17 with no fiancee in sight
 
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