How do you decide on how often to 'treat yo self'?

[Sprinkles&Stones]

I've been having 'gem fever' for what feels like forever, when my fingers get itchy to buy more diamonds. How do you folks decide how often and how much to spend on a new sparkle? I just bought a yellow diamond ring, but now I can't stop dreaming of bands to pair with it.... Do you guys give yourselves a limit for the month/year? I feel like I need someone to give me an allowance, haha!

 

[mwilliamanderson]

You can't ask a question like that without showing us the yellow diamond ring!

 

[elle_71125]

Simple...When my bank account allows.

In all seriousness though, I’d love to see your new yellow diamond too.

 

[diamondnewbieny]

I treat myself whenever I can... not good for me... but I can’t control how impulsive I am toward jewelry!

 

[dk168]

Yup, I treat myself whenever I need a pick-me-up and when the piggy bank allows me to do so.

And it does not have to be jewellery.

DK

 

[stonehunter20]

i guess that's a good problem to have?! it's a very personal choice. for me, unlike buying groceries which i do any time i want, buying a piece of jewelry that is going to cost $$$$$ has to be for some special occasion for me, to make it more meaningful or justifiable or whatever for me to feel confident putting down that money.

also it comes down to our financial goals, it's definitely easier for me to make big purchases when we feel comfortable about blowing $$$ away on non-necessities.

 

[AllAboardTheBlingTrain]

I force myself to stick to jewelry purchases 1-2x a year, it makes sure that I’m only making considered purchases, because I also won’t buy something unless it’s been on my wishlist for a long time. The budget is dictated by my savings - I don’t have an upper limit on my purchases as such, but I’m limited by what I’ve saved, obviously, and since I have some very pricey items on my list, I can’t spend all my money every year or I’ll never be able to acquire my pricey things!

I do treat myself to non jewelry purchases every month though - haircuts, mani-pedis, a really nice dinner, a handbag, sometimes clothes shopping (unfortunately because of global Armageddon I’ve only been able to indulge in the latter for most of this year).

 

[dk168]

@AllAboardTheBlingTrain a monthly haircut for me is a necessity, not a luxury, and appears on my monthly budget as a regular outgoing!

DK

 

[AllAboardTheBlingTrain]

@AllAboardTheBlingTrain a monthly haircut for me is a necessity, not a luxury, and appears on my monthly budget as a regular outgoing!

DK

Haha I have very long hair so I cut it only a few times a year. I’m aiming to grow my hair until below my butt but I think that might be impossible

 

[ThiaChelf]

Just as the budget allows. I'm new to this love of jewelry so bought the crop out of stuff for a bit but now I am out of funds. Maybe this will teach me to save....

 

[kenny]

Whenever I have the funds for something I feel like buying.
Why is this even a question?

 

[Bron357]

If an outstanding “upgrade” or “upsize” presents itself at a good price, I’m buying because I am going to then sell my other piece....well.....thats the intention.....Hmmmm
My upgraded Opal ring still seems to be in my jewelery box...

 

[missy]

If I see something I love and really envision myself enjoying and wearing and I have the funds I go for it.

 

[tyty333]

I usually limit myself to birthdays, anniversaries, and Christmas. My thinking (for myself) is somewhat weird. The ability to buy something at any time
sort of takes the specialness away. If I buy something for a special date or occasion it means more to me. I guess that is my unintentional way of
limiting myself.

 

[Yelena]

I've been having 'gem fever' for what feels like forever, when my fingers get itchy to buy more diamonds. How do you folks decide how often and how much to spend on a new sparkle? I just bought a yellow diamond ring, but now I can't stop dreaming of bands to pair with it.... Do you guys give yourselves a limit for the month/year? I feel like I need someone to give me an allowance, haha!

Ah Johanna I feel your pain. Perhaps we need a support group here on PS for those of us afflicted with this problem?
I am containing my desires for beautiful and interesting jewellery by just adding things to my wish list. I am doing my best to plan purchases rather than being driven by a whim. Now that I am older and know myself better I am far more choosy. I have plans for an ‘ultimate‘ sapphire ring which will be heirloom quality as I now know that I am unlikely to get bored of a blue sapphire paired with diamonds. I also have a plan for a signet ring. It’s very much about working on perfecting the designs and making sure that I am happy with them before spending any money. In terms of purchases birthdays are good excuses for new jewellery, especially significant ones. Less expensive pieces can be purchased more often, significant pieces less often. So for me, I toil away thinking about dropping $20k on a ring, but am more likely to go and spend $500-$800 on a pair of earrings as a birthday and Christmas treat for myself.

Maybe just give yourself a yearly budget and stick to it.

 

[MRBXXXFVVS1]

In these pandemic times, I say treat yourself as much as you want, as long as you can comfortably afford it. Meaning, bills are paid, no debt, emergency fund, retirement, savings and investments all taken care of.

 

[Sunstorm]

The sky is the limit.
When I have the funds and the right one comes along. I have a good excuse, I blame it on being in the trade and it being work related.

 

[scouty]

Um.... where’s the pics of your new yellow diamond?!

 

[RunningwithScissors]

I use a very specific jewelry savings/spending plan. It involves two parts -- a focussed, long-term "wish list" and a designated savings account just for jewelry purchases.

Part 1: Wishlist

My wish list has evolved over time. It contains a few classic, very high quality jewelry pieces that I know I will get lots of use out of for the rest of my life, and that will make me feel like a queen. These are all "forever" pieces, not just fun for now or whimsy items. I enjoy taking time to research each one. I try on pieces many times at many vendors to nail down exactly what I want. I am 46 years old and by now I know my style and my unique aesthetic. Each piece on my list MUST complement my look AND my lifestyle. (I can admire a piece of jewelry, but not feel the urge to buy it if it does not fit both lifestyle and aesthetic.)

Part 2: The Sparkly Fund

I have a separate bank account I call my "Sparkly Fund." I can spend money from the Sparkly Fund on anything fun I want -- jewelry for myself, a trip for my family, artwork (my other big love), a special gift for my husband, etc.

I ONLY put "extra" money into the Sparkly Fund. This includes money I get for presents (birthday, Xmas) or unexpected windfalls (bonuses at work) and money from my "side hustles." I have several side gigs I have created and grown specifically to bolster the Sparkly Fund. I find when I crave a piece of jewelry, I work extra hard at these. A little creativity and some elbow grease can earn serious money! Also, I have found my side hustles have always added to my life and not detracted.

I never use money from my regular day job for the Sparkly Fund, I put my regular earnings into our family account and savings accounts -- normal bill paying, designated longterm and retirement savings, etc.

When do I know it is time to buy a piece of jewelry? When I have enough saved to afford an item on my wishlist. Its that simple. Doing it this way, I have zero guilt associated with buying jewelry. Also, I am not tempted to overspend. Lastly, it makes me NOT spend on impulse items. Sure, I occasionally see a marvelous jewelry piece on Instagram, not on my wishlist, that tempts me. For example, last week I saw an antique snake bracelet for about $6,000 that I'd love to own. Right now I have $9,000 in my Sparkly Fund -- I could buy it if I want. However, I know I REALLY REALLY REALLY want the items on my forever wish list and a snake bracelet is just not one of them. I am more than half way to my next major purchase, I know how hard I've worked at my side hustles to get here, so I don't want to blow money on anything but my wishlist items.

The only difficult decisions for me are which wish list item to buy next. I have months to ponder this because it takes time to save up. The jewelry items I want tend to fall into similar price categories. For example, I have two items on my wishlist that are very different but are both around $15K -- an eternity band and a diamond pendant necklace (I know very specifically which ones I want and have had them priced out with the vendors.) When I have $15K saved up, I calculate by this coming winter, I will have to decide if I want to pull the trigger on one of those two lovelies, or, if I will continue saving until I reach the next price category for the higher priced items on my list -- namely to upgrade my CBI stud earrings or a WF tennis bracelet.

Having a wish list of heirloom quality items I love keeps me on track to not make impulse buys, to save every penny I can, and to be inventive and work extra hard at side hustles. Ultimately, my life is enriched by all of these things.

I know this plan is not for everyone, but it works very well for me. I love to own only a few, super high quality items and I'm willing to focus like a laser beam on making them a reality without taking any extra money away from my family, our happiness or our retirement savings.

As a side note, my husband has really gotten into helping with some of my side hustles and they have turned into times we both enjoy. Bonus!

I am happy to share what I do for side hustles if anyone needs brainstorming help in coming up with ideas to fund their Sparkly Funds. The side gigs are not glamorous, but they are fun in their own way. I want us all to achieve our jewelry goals! It is very doable with creativity, patience and elbow grease.

 

[seaurchin]

I budget $200 per month for guilt-free jewelry purchases, plus more for my special gift dates like birthday and Christmas.

 

[PreRaphaelite]

No real time limit or planned schedule. Opportunities tend to happen in clumps, in my experience. If I have the funds, I charge headlong.

#ShopsLikeTiger

 

[mommylawyer]

I have a budget that I set at the beginning of each year. In January, I write the number at the top of a new page in my budgeting notebook and subtract every time I make a purchase. When the balance hits zero, I'm done for the year.

 

[mwilliamanderson]

I am happy to share what I do for side hustles if anyone needs brainstorming help in coming up with ideas to fund their Sparkly Funds. The side gigs are not glamorous, but they are fun in their own way. I want us all to achieve our jewelry goals! It is very doable with creativity, patience and elbow grease.

You have me curious! I need a sparkly fund

 

[PreRaphaelite]

Following!

 

[RunningwithScissors]

You have me curious! I need a sparkly fund

Sparkly Funds rock! (bad pun intended.)

I have four side hustles.

I'm a professional artist (a painter.) That's my "day job," not my side hustle. I'm at the level where it pays well. Pick up this month's Fine Art Connoisseur magazine, and my paintings are in it. I am in multiple national shows each year, at galleries across the country.

But that means long hours in my studio, ALONE, getting my work done. Its solitary work. So, my side hustles emphasize connecting with other people, to have social interaction.

Side Gig #1: I board people's dogs at my house! Only one or two at a time, and only well behaved ones. They just hang out with me in my studio. I love it! They sit there smiling at me, occasionally I stop to give them a belly rub. I started doing this a year ago, but it has blossomed into a lot of extra money and not much extra effort. Also, I have met and made friends with people in my neighborhood I never would have met before. It provides companionship and love throughout the day. I only recommend this if you understand dogs, love them and stick to a strict schedule. I'm on a website called Rover.com which connects pet sitters to people who need them. You can set the parameters for anything you wish. Maybe you only like cats, or only want to walk dogs, not pet sit them. You decide.

Side Gig #2: I'm Marie Kondoing my home for the Sparkly Fund! I am going through each room of my house and seriously reducing the amount of stuff my husband and I own. It feels wonderful to get rid of clutter! I love the open space it makes! It can be difficult to part with items, but I take them to a local charity shop where I receive 60% of each sale. Other items I sell on eBay or Loupe Troop. I've made about $6K in the last year and have improved my home and my morale significantly! I hold each item in my hand and weigh whether it would make me happier to keep it or to sell it and be a step closer to my earring upgrade! My husband has gotten into this too and now he loves his closet and actually hangs out it it sometimes admiring his clothes in neat little rows (whereas before he hated it and couldn't find anything he wanted to wear.) For my friends in the DC metro area, try selling your clutter at the Christ Child Resale Shop in Georgetown. I'm in the Houston area and I use The Guild Store. Every single thing I take in sells, charity shops have great turn around! (And a percentage goes to the help people in your community too!)

Side Gig #3: My art career is centered on "representational" art (art that is realistic or impressionistic.) I started painting abstracts on the side as a warm up each morning, to get loosened up. Side Gig #3 is selling those warm ups! I have created a whole new body of work with these abstract pieces. I can't sell them through the galleries that represent my realistic work, (galleries typically only show one genre of art so my galleries are all realist-based). So, I sell these abstracts through online vendors such as Saatchi.com (an art clearinghouse). I use a pseudonym in order to keep my two bodies of work separate. I can create them quickly, so I sell them at a fraction of what my realist work goes for.

Side Gig #4: I write articles for some of the "how-to" art magazines. Art magazines are divided into two groups. One group targets collectors, and one is geared for artists. The ones geared for artists are always in search of articles explaining different painting and drawing methods and materials, advice on how to find gallery representation, how to apply for shows, grants, etc. So I knock out articles. I wake up an hour early each morning and make it my "writing hour" before breakfast. Doing that really fires up my brain for the day. There are many "how-to" magazines in all subjects, from fly-fishing to showing dogs, and most are actively looking for articles.

Pre-Covid I was considering waiting tables one night a week for a local restaurant because I love their food and eat there way too often (I know their menu by heart!) Its like my version of "Cheers," everyone knows my name! I thought the interaction with people would be good for me. I waited tables in college so I knew I could do it. But then Covid hit, so it didn't happen.

Here's other side hustles some of my real life friends have:

Teach a class. Everyone has some knowledge they can share. Perhaps you know how to speak Spanish? Or you know how to make old fashioned jam at home and can show people how to pickle, can or preserve. Maybe you can sew, quilt, or make backyard compost. Maybe you know the local migratory bird species and can show children how to spot them. How is your tennis backhand? Almost any skill you can think of, you can teach. Most communities have outlets for locals to teach non-professional level courses. In non-Covid times, this is a great way to make new friends. During the pandemic, online classes have really taken off.

Tutor students. You can do this online. You don't need to be highly educated in any particular field to help kids with their elementary school homework. But if you do have special skills, like foreign languages or math, those are highly in demand.

Babysit. I know several adults who love to occasionally take care of children. Its their fix for missing their own children or grandchildren. Snuggling with a baby elevates all our feel-good hormones and makes us happy. Pre-Covid I did this occasionally because I don't have children of my own.

My dad who was a high-powered attorney used to love playing piano in a bar to unwind. He started doing it in law school to pay bills and then just kept doing it for fun later in life, not for money (but it actually pays very well!).

My friend's dad who was a Colonel in the Air Force was into biking so much, he decided to work at a bike shop on the weekends once his kids left for college. He didn't want to sit around a quiet house and he loved talking "bike" with people.

Pre-Covid driving for Uber was an option. You could do it as much or as little as you like. I knew two retired men (engineers!) who loved it because they needed a break from their houses and liked the social interaction. Now with Covid, I personally wouldn't do it. But when the pandemic dies away (it will eventually) those options are back on the table.

I hope these ideas get your "side hustle" juices going. The trick is to find things that add to your life, that make you better or connect you to others in a meaningful way.

 

[mwilliamanderson]

Wow! I’ve always admired painters. It sounds like you’ve found a lovely balance within your profession. I used to draw for hours as a child but never had the patience it takes to progress as an artist.

I love all the ideas for side gigs. You’ve got me thinking....
Thanks.

 

[GliderPoss]

Yeah pretty much whenever budget allows which is rare as I'm trying to save for a house deposit! I did just buy a wee Ethiopian opal ring for $100 on the weekend as an impulse purchase but usually I try to save up for heirloom pieces, especially as I have a bunch of stones waiting with Daniel M waiting to be set...

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Sparkly Funds rock! (bad pun intended.)

I have four side hustles.

I'm a professional artist (a painter.) That's my "day job," not my side hustle. I'm at the level where it pays well. Pick up this month's Fine Art Connoisseur magazine, and my paintings are in it. I am in multiple national shows each year, at galleries across the country.

But that means long hours in my studio, ALONE, getting my work done. Its solitary work. So, my side hustles emphasize connecting with other people, to have social interaction.

Side Gig #1: I board people's dogs at my house! Only one or two at a time, and only well behaved ones. They just hang out with me in my studio. I love it! They sit there smiling at me, occasionally I stop to give them a belly rub. I started doing this a year ago, but it has blossomed into a lot of extra money and not much extra effort. Also, I have met and made friends with people in my neighborhood I never would have met before. It provides companionship and love throughout the day. I only recommend this if you understand dogs, love them and stick to a strict schedule. I'm on a website called Rover.com which connects pet sitters to people who need them. You can set the parameters for anything you wish. Maybe you only like cats, or only want to walk dogs, not pet sit them. You decide.

Side Gig #2: I'm Marie Kondoing my home for the Sparkly Fund! I am going through each room of my house and seriously reducing the amount of stuff my husband and I own. It feels wonderful to get rid of clutter! I love the open space it makes! It can be difficult to part with items, but I take them to a local charity shop where I receive 60% of each sale. Other items I sell on eBay or Loupe Troop. I've made about $6K in the last year and have improved my home and my morale significantly! I hold each item in my hand and weigh whether it would make me happier to keep it or to sell it and be a step closer to my earring upgrade! My husband has gotten into this too and now he loves his closet and actually hangs out it it sometimes admiring his clothes in neat little rows (whereas before he hated it and couldn't find anything he wanted to wear.) For my friends in the DC metro area, try selling your clutter at the Christ Child Resale Shop in Georgetown. I'm in the Houston area and I use The Guild Store. Every single thing I take in sells, charity shops have great turn around! (And a percentage goes to the help people in your community too!)

Side Gig #3: My art career is centered on "representational" art (art that is realistic or impressionistic.) I started painting abstracts on the side as a warm up each morning, to get loosened up. Side Gig #3 is selling those warm ups! I have created a whole new body of work with these abstract pieces. I can't sell them through the galleries that represent my realistic work, (galleries typically only show one genre of art so my galleries are all realist-based). So, I sell these abstracts through online vendors such as Saatchi.com (an art clearinghouse). I use a pseudonym in order to keep my two bodies of work separate. I can create them quickly, so I sell them at a fraction of what my realist work goes for.

Side Gig #4: I write articles for some of the "how-to" art magazines. Art magazines are divided into two groups. One group targets collectors, and one is geared for artists. The ones geared for artists are always in search of articles explaining different painting and drawing methods and materials, advice on how to find gallery representation, how to apply for shows, grants, etc. So I knock out articles. I wake up an hour early each morning and make it my "writing hour" before breakfast. Doing that really fires up my brain for the day. There are many "how-to" magazines in all subjects, from fly-fishing to showing dogs, and most are actively looking for articles.

Pre-Covid I was considering waiting tables one night a week for a local restaurant because I love their food and eat there way too often (I know their menu by heart!) Its like my version of "Cheers," everyone knows my name! I thought the interaction with people would be good for me. I waited tables in college so I knew I could do it. But then Covid hit, so it didn't happen.

Here's other side hustles some of my real life friends have:

Teach a class. Everyone has some knowledge they can share. Perhaps you know how to speak Spanish? Or you know how to make old fashioned jam at home and can show people how to pickle, can or preserve. Maybe you can sew, quilt, or make backyard compost. Maybe you know the local migratory bird species and can show children how to spot them. How is your tennis backhand? Almost any skill you can think of, you can teach. Most communities have outlets for locals to teach non-professional level courses. In non-Covid times, this is a great way to make new friends. During the pandemic, online classes have really taken off.

Tutor students. You can do this online. You don't need to be highly educated in any particular field to help kids with their elementary school homework. But if you do have special skills, like foreign languages or math, those are highly in demand.

Babysit. I know several adults who love to occasionally take care of children. Its their fix for missing their own children or grandchildren. Snuggling with a baby elevates all our feel-good hormones and makes us happy. Pre-Covid I did this occasionally because I don't have children of my own.

My dad who was a high-powered attorney used to love playing piano in a bar to unwind. He started doing it in law school to pay bills and then just kept doing it for fun later in life, not for money (but it actually pays very well!).

My friend's dad who was a Colonel in the Air Force was into biking so much, he decided to work at a bike shop on the weekends once his kids left for college. He didn't want to sit around a quiet house and he loved talking "bike" with people.

Pre-Covid driving for Uber was an option. You could do it as much or as little as you like. I knew two retired men (engineers!) who loved it because they needed a break from their houses and liked the social interaction. Now with Covid, I personally wouldn't do it. But when the pandemic dies away (it will eventually) those options are back on the table.

I hope these ideas get your "side hustle" juices going. The trick is to find things that add to your life, that make you better or connect you to others in a meaningful way.

You are an inspiration in so many ways! First of all, I really love how well thought out your jewelry collection is! I love some things I have bought but never wear them! I want to regroup and try to fix some of my errors (partly by selling and partly by giving pieces to my daughters). I need to clean out my jewelry box like you are doing with your home! I actually would do much better with a few great pieces since I tend to wear the same pieces 99% of the time!

You have great ideas for side gigs to save for the sparkly fund! However, I am very impressed that you have a successful art career, because my youngest is an artist and so desires to earn a living that way. She loves jewelry, too! I want to try to buy that magazine if I can find it. What month is it? August?

 

[diamondseeker2006]

To answer the OP, I would say that I try to tie most purchases with birthday, Christmas, or anniversary, even though many times something comes along months before or after those occasions. We use extra income or savings to buy all gifts. Many years ago we opened Roth IRA accounts in each of our names to save some fun money. We just let it sit and earn money and didn't touch it until we both retired. It can be used for trips, jewelry, or any luxuries since that is not part of our retirement funds or income. Actually I have not yet touched mine, because I like seeing it grow. But I may break into it soon while the stock market is relatively high! Obviously for those with incomes too high for a Roth, a regular mutual fund account is a great way to have a long term luxury investment account. I love RunningwithScissors' idea to have a side job to save extra money, too! It's great to have current savings that can be used as well as the long term account I mentioned.

I think the key thing is to always have emergency savings, retirement saving, and education savings taken care of first before funding a sparkly fund. It saddens me when I see people selling jewelry because of vet bills, car repairs, etc. Those things should be funded either from the emergency savings or a health care savings account. We bought very little major jewelry for me until I turned 50, and we had all of those other savings accomplished and 2 out of three kids out of college (fully paid for, no loans).

 

[Sprinkles&Stones]

You can't ask a question like that without showing us the yellow diamond ring!

haha! it's still in production, I should have it mid September! I know, I am impatient to get it!