Horrible year, anyone bought jewelry to turn the page?

[peonyinlove]

I am in the midst of a very sad time, and this year has been really rough. I'm mad and sad, and feeling a little reckless, and kind of want to forcibly turn things around ... Sort of "If I have to live through this stuff, at least I'll do it with diamonds".

It won't hurt my finances, but has anyone done this? Did the piece become important to you in a good way or did the memories of why you bought it tarnish your piece? I would hate to regret the purchase.

I'd love to hear and see what you bought during/after a tough time in your life.

 

[Kim N]

I'm so sorry to hear it's been a rough year, peonyinlove. I have made a substantial purchase after such a period, and the piece remains very important to me, in a good way. Sending you gentle hugs.

 

[PreRaphaelite]

I'm sorry things have been rough for you. I hope whatever little pick-me-up you find brings you joy and comfort. <3

 

[HS4S_2]

I had a really rough years a while back and decided I was going to turn it around and I purchased my Casablanca from @diamondseeker2006. I adore her and it made the piece even more special. I hope everything goes good for you and you find something special.

 

[Autumn in New England]

I am in the midst of a very sad time, and this year has been really rough. I'm mad and sad, and feeling a little reckless, and kind of want to forcibly turn things around ... Sort of "If I have to live through this stuff, at least I'll do it with diamonds".

It won't hurt my finances, but has anyone done this? Did the piece become important to you in a good way or did the memories of why you bought it tarnish your piece? I would hate to regret the purchase.

I'd love to hear and see what you bought during/after a tough time in your life.

Sending you big hugs for a better and brighter 2023, peony.

We all know that the love of family and friends is what truly sustains and fulfills us... it isn't the material "things." But I think most PSers would also agree that, as collectors, we greatly value our assemblage of gems as well. They make us happy too, lift our spirits, and, yes, even cause us to stop and feel grateful for all that we have. So I guess what I'm saying is, if you have the discretionary funds, go and grab yourself something sparkly. It sounds like you've earned every carat. I've never regretted a gem purchase, ever. Well, maybe some of my early purchases where I didn't quite know what I was doing! But even then, I just wished the pieces were bigger and better!! Best wishes to you.

 

[lulu_ma]

Yes, absolutely. I had my ering in its original setting for over 2 decades. Then my dad got cancer and had surgery and treatment. All of a sudden I had a burning desire to do a reset. It was a fun, positive project to focus on.

I hope you can find yourself joyful distraction!

 

[Tigerlilyrosepetal]

Yes-my rings are daily reminders to me to treat myself well. We can go through adversity and remain resilient. I feel that my jewelry can be symbolic of inner beauty and strength.

 

[Rons Wolfe]

My year has been beyond horrible, I haven't bought anything because even that wouldn't help.

 

[RunningwithScissors]

I'm sorry you are going through a difficult time @peonyinlove

I tend to crave sparkles when I'm going through a rough patch too. Perhaps I'm similar to you (or perhaps not, I don't know). For me, I believe the desire to buy sparklies comes from two triggers, and sparklies fills two needs/voids.

One is that I often feel taken for granted by my loved ones, my parents especially, but sometimes my spouse, sometimes by the people at the art organization I donate far too much time/work to, etc. When I feel taken for granted or treated badly, I want to buy myself sparklies as an act of self care/self love. I feel like "well even if YOU don't appreciate me/my time/effort/worth, I appreciate me, darn it! So I do it at times I need a loving touch from the world but the world is far from loving.

The second void it fills is that I often feel my life is filled with more than its share of drudgery, and mind-numbing, soul-crushing, grubby, less-than-glamorous work with zero celebrations, zero fun, and zero time off. Then I feel like I can, actually, purchase joy, or at least purchase "art" (I see really nice jewelry/diamonds as art) which to me, alleviates some of the drudgery of the mundane. Art of all forms, whether music, or extraordinary jewelry or paintings does bring me out of my grubby existence while I experience it. I believe it does add to life's meaning. I do believe true art gives us a glimpse of the divine (maybe divine isn't the correct term, I'm an atheist, so I don't really mean god, more like a glimpse of truth, or human nature, or eternity, or I don't know what but something more than ourselves.)

Sorry for the long self analysis or navel gazing. I'm laying out my feelings in case they are of help to you. If you feel something similar, please know you are not alone.

Hugs to you. I hope things improve for you.

 

[yssie]

I was going to say something kind and vague. But y’know what.

@peonyinlove, if something sparkly would help you feel better then buy it. Buy it, enjoy the heck out of it, let enjoying the heck out of it totally distract you from everything that you might need a break from. And don’t apologize for that. Don’t ever apologize for that. Nothing is ever more important than feeling like you can get through it.

Me, it’s dandy until it’s not. And bling just makes me happy. It enthralls me and distracts me. It’s something to daydream about and focus on when I feel panic brewing. Someone else might claim that it’s useless and unimportant and the last thing I should be expending effort on when There Are Bigger Concerns. F that.

I hope that things peach up for you quickly!! But until then… Cheers to sparkling our terrible horrible no good very bad days away together

 

[lissyflo]

I was going to say something kind and vague. But y’know what.

@peonyinlove, if something sparkly would help you feel better then buy it. Buy it, enjoy the heck out of it, let enjoying the heck out of it totally distract you from everything that you might need a break from. And don’t apologize for that. Don’t ever apologize for that. Nothing is ever more important than feeling like you can get through it.

Me, it’s dandy until it’s not. And bling just makes me happy. It enthralls me and distracts me. It’s something to daydream about and focus on when I feel panic brewing. Someone else might claim that it’s useless and unimportant and the last thing I should be expending effort on when There Are Bigger Concerns. F that.

I hope that things peach up for you quickly!! But until then… Cheers to sparkling our terrible horrible no good very bad days away together

I’m not going to attempt to follow that: Yssie said it more eloquently than I ever could. So I’ll add a big, fat +1 and let you know that I’m across the pond buying my way through a shitty year too. Yes it helps, and no it doesn’t help. But no-one ever promised this shit would be easy, and if you have the funds then who wouldn’t want to live life with a little joy whatever form that joy takes for you. Sending hugs and hopes that things improve for you soon.

 

[lovedogs]

I have bought waaaaay more than I should have this year for the same reason. It was beyond crap and I needed to: 1. Be distracted, and 2. Feel like I was spending MY money on something I wanted for ME.

I dont regret the purchases, though my wallet is very angry with me haha

 

[diamondyes]

For me it is all about the intention during the purchase. Am I stress-buying because im not coping well, or is this an intentional purchase to celebrate my strength?

I am ALL ABOUT the latter

 

[diamondyes]

Sending you big hugs for a better and brighter 2023, peony.

We all know that the love of family and friends is what truly sustains and fulfills us... it isn't the material "things." But I think most PSers would also agree that, as collectors, we greatly value our assemblage of gems as well. They make us happy too, lift our spirits, and, yes, even cause us to stop and feel grateful for all that we have. So I guess what I'm saying is, if you have the discretionary funds, go and grab yourself something sparkly. It sounds like you've earned every carat. I've never regretted a gem purchase, ever. Well, maybe some of my early purchases where I didn't quite know what I was doing! But even then, I just wished the pieces were bigger and better!! Best wishes to you.

Also, planning and talking about a project with bling friends can be a much-needed form of connection

 

[ArielleB]

I have actually just tried this approach, and I highly recommend it! My Cartier Love has already helped me deal with what ‘22 just keeps dishing out. I 100% second #runningwithscissors! Also, I’m pretty sure I get a hit of dopamine/oxytocin with every glance—what a wholesome antidepressant.

This has been an annus horribilus for so many, I’m so sorry you’re in that club. Let’s look forward with hope that ‘23 will be our annus mirabilis! x

 

[diamondyes]

Oh and to add/ bling buying is much less detrimental than drinking or gambling or many other coping methods.

 

[AllAboardTheBlingTrain]

I’ve had a rough year too, so I’m going to just say you’re not alone. I definitely bought a bunch of things - some expensive, some not - to put a smile on my face on the days getting out of bed seemed too hard.

Life is short. If you can afford the thing and you want the thing - buy the thing.

One thing I would say is that it’s not a miracle cure. I still have days of bone-aching sadness, especially right now around the holidays. Looking at sparklies hasn’t made the sadness go away. But it did provide a little pep in my step when I bought them especially, and now it doesn’t make me any sadder or remind me of unpleasant memories when I do look at them because buying them was an act of self-love.

Here’s hoping 2023 isn’t the shitshow 2022 has been. All my love with you.

 

[Autumn in New England]

My year has been beyond horrible, I haven't bought anything because even that wouldn't help.

Sending you a virtual hug too, and hoping you have a happy and healing 2023!

 

[Autumn in New England]

I'm sorry you are going through a difficult time @peonyinlove

I tend to crave sparkles when I'm going through a rough patch too. Perhaps I'm similar to you (or perhaps not, I don't know). For me, I believe the desire to buy sparklies comes from two triggers, and sparklies fills two needs/voids.

One is that I often feel taken for granted by my loved ones, my parents especially, but sometimes my spouse, sometimes by the people at the art organization I donate far too much time/work to, etc. When I feel taken for granted or treated badly, I want to buy myself sparklies as an act of self care/self love. I feel like "well even if YOU don't appreciate me/my time/effort/worth, I appreciate me, darn it! So I do it at times I need a loving touch from the world but the world is far from loving.

The second void it fills is that I often feel my life is filled with more than its share of drudgery, and mind-numbing, soul-crushing, grubby, less-than-glamorous work with zero celebrations, zero fun, and zero time off. Then I feel like I can, actually, purchase joy, or at least purchase "art" (I see really nice jewelry/diamonds as art) which to me, alleviates some of the drudgery of the mundane. Art of all forms, whether music, or extraordinary jewelry or paintings does bring me out of my grubby existence while I experience it. I believe it does add to life's meaning. I do believe true art gives us a glimpse of the divine (maybe divine isn't the correct term, I'm an atheist, so I don't really mean god, more like a glimpse of truth, or human nature, or eternity, or I don't know what but something more than ourselves.)

Sorry for the long self analysis or navel gazing. I'm laying out my feelings in case they are of help to you. If you feel something similar, please know you are not alone.

Hugs to you. I hope things improve for you.

This is such a great post...

 

[Autumn in New England]

I was going to say something kind and vague. But y’know what.

@peonyinlove, if something sparkly would help you feel better then buy it. Buy it, enjoy the heck out of it, let enjoying the heck out of it totally distract you from everything that you might need a break from. And don’t apologize for that. Don’t ever apologize for that. Nothing is ever more important than feeling like you can get through it.

Me, it’s dandy until it’s not. And bling just makes me happy. It enthralls me and distracts me. It’s something to daydream about and focus on when I feel panic brewing. Someone else might claim that it’s useless and unimportant and the last thing I should be expending effort on when There Are Bigger Concerns. F that.

I hope that things peach up for you quickly!! But until then… Cheers to sparkling our terrible horrible no good very bad days away together

Hear, hear!!

 

[Autumn in New England]

For me it is all about the intention during the purchase. Am I stress-buying because im not coping well, or is this an intentional purchase to celebrate my strength?

I am ALL ABOUT the latter

Excellent point!

Also, planning and talking about a project with bling friends can be a much-needed form of connection

And the way everyone here is always so excited for other members' new projects is really uplifting!!

 

[missy]

My year has been beyond horrible, I haven't bought anything because even that wouldn't help.

Rons Wolfe, I just want to say I am so very sorry for your great loss and my heart goes out to you. There truly are no words for your loss and I just wanted you to know I am keeping you in my thoughts. And sending you gentle hugs

 

[missy]

I am in the midst of a very sad time, and this year has been really rough. I'm mad and sad, and feeling a little reckless, and kind of want to forcibly turn things around ... Sort of "If I have to live through this stuff, at least I'll do it with diamonds".

It won't hurt my finances, but has anyone done this? Did the piece become important to you in a good way or did the memories of why you bought it tarnish your piece? I would hate to regret the purchase.

I'd love to hear and see what you bought during/after a tough time in your life.

@peonyinlove I am sorry you have had a tough year.

You do what you need to do to make life less painful and more pleasant and to that end if it won't hurt your bottom line (retirement and financial security) and you think it will make life better go for it.

Personally, I quickly learned that buying things didn't make my life better. This is me and I am not extrapolating to what others should or do feel. I have had challenging times in my life and yes I did turn to buying things. But it helped only momentarily. And honestly now, not even a little bit.

So I guess for me it is good as I am no longer impulse spending and buying. Of course now I am fixated on rescuing more animals but we are at full capacity indoors so I must resist. There are other things we do to help animals. Because that is what makes me feel better. Doing good if I can and doing what I can to make others lives better. But buying things for myself? Doesn't do it anymore. For me.

However, and this is important, you do you. And do what makes you feel better. There is no right or wrong. As long as you can afford it. IMO

 

[missy]

For me it is all about the intention during the purchase. Am I stress-buying because im not coping well, or is this an intentional purchase to celebrate my strength?

I am ALL ABOUT the latter

Yes, 100% yes to this. Buy from a point of strength and celebration versus buying from a point of weakness and being stressed out.

 

[missy]

I’ve had a rough year too, so I’m going to just say you’re not alone. I definitely bought a bunch of things - some expensive, some not - to put a smile on my face on the days getting out of bed seemed too hard.

Life is short. If you can afford the thing and you want the thing - buy the thing.

One thing I would say is that it’s not a miracle cure. I still have days of bone-aching sadness, especially right now around the holidays. Looking at sparklies hasn’t made the sadness go away. But it did provide a little pep in my step when I bought them especially, and now it doesn’t make me any sadder or remind me of unpleasant memories when I do look at them because buying them was an act of self-love.

Here’s hoping 2023 isn’t the shitshow 2022 has been. All my love with you.

Sending you good thoughts and gentle hugs. And I agree completely

 

[tyty333]

I bought a diamond bracelet during a divorce. It cheered me up at the time and I don't regret buying a little something to get
me through the sad times. However, it now sits in my jewelry box. I think its more the style because I think if I truly loved it I
would wear it even if I associate it with my divorce. (This was pre-pricescope so the quality is questionable).

 

[diamondyes]

Haha any jewelry that I associate with bad juju I just remind myself- it’s not the ring’s fault! It’s just a ring! It needs some love

 

[Eli22]

Sorry you (and quite a few other people here) are having a difficult year!

Everyone’s answers resonated with me, especially @Autumn in New England , @RunningwithScissors & @yssie . So +100 to all the thoughtful replies here!

Personally, I have a very high stress, “always on” career (I’m the chick who always brings a laptop on vacation and is typing away on it in the airplane…sorry if you had to listen to my furious tapping in the air lol). Planning jewelry purchases (especially custom) and vacations are what gets me through a lot of the day to day. I think of them as my “carrot” to look forward to/work towards…and it really helps, especially on days I just want to “quit life.”

My thoughts are: As long as you are not hurting anyone (and can afford it) - do whatever you need to do to inject some happiness in your life!!

TLDR: Life is short, buy the bling

Hoping 2023 is better year for all of us!