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Here''s the dress my cousin likes

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robbie3982

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...And here''s a reminder of what my dress looks like...



Is it just me, or are these dresses really similiar?
 

upgrading mama

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HAs she seen yours???

I would say they look strikingly similar except for the strap vs. strapless part....
 

Aurelia

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Jul 30, 2006
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Try to think of it this way. They''re both white. They''re both wedding dresses. END OF DISCUSSION!

Really - you''re going to kill yourself worrying about similarities/comparisons between your wedding and hers. YOU are going to be a beautiful bride with an amazing wedding. Period.

I love your dress more... not a huge fan of the neckline of hers. Didn''t want to take sides, but hey... there it is!

TRY to stop COMPARING!

Aurelia
 

larussel03

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I say from here on out, make a pact with your cousin and your mom and aunt--no discussion of wedding decor/styles/dresses anything like that. You could just be like "apparantly you have great taste--MINE" (just kidding, haha). You could say "it''s just that we have SUCH similar tastes, that I want to make sure we don''t inadvertantly end up having the same wedding." Or, in reality, you want her to stop taking your ideas!
 

psaddict

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I agree with sweet pea''s suggestion... are there any people who are very involved in the planning of both weddings? if not, you could just try to keep the rest of the planning on the down low, you could say you''re still considering options, and just not volunteer any information. If her wedding is before yours, she''ll have to make decisions soon, I would assume. It seems to me that she''s just jealous of you, and whether she realizes it or not she''s doing things similar to the way you''re doing them. If she doesn''t know the details of your wedding... she can''t use the ideas, whether on purpose or not!
 

robbie3982

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She has seen mine. I think you guys are right. I probably shouldn't discuss any more wedding details, though I don't think she's purposely trying to copy. I know our weddings will be different and mine will be great no matter what hers is like, but if you came to mine a month after hers, would you think i copied her dress?
 

psaddict

Shiny_Rock
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Dec 9, 2006
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Oh and I agree about your dress being a better cut, and I''m not just saying that. I think hers will show way too much cleavage, which in my opinion is not really appropriate for a wedding dress!
 

VRBeauty

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Date: 12/20/2006 10:13:27 PM
Author: Aurelia
Try to think of it this way. They''re both white. They''re both wedding dresses. END OF DISCUSSION!

Really - you''re going to kill yourself worrying about similarities/comparisons between your wedding and hers. YOU are going to be a beautiful bride with an amazing wedding. Period.

I love your dress more... not a huge fan of the neckline of hers. Didn''t want to take sides, but hey... there it is!

TRY to stop COMPARING!

Aurelia
DITTO! Focus on your wedding. The only aspect of her wedding you need to worry about is your flower girl (floral attendant?) dress.
 

Christa

Brilliant_Rock
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Dang, your dress is flippin'' gorgeous!
I can see the similarities, I guess, but I bet what people will remember the most about hers will be that her boobs were hanging out of it.
 

jesterjigger

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Apr 14, 2006
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274
A month difference I wouldn''t think you were copying...if yours was six months different I would maybe suspect it if you both were more distant relatives that I don''t talk to a lot and know well. But I think most people that would care (ie women) realize how long it takes to order a wedding dress. But that''s using the logic that the person with the later wedding wouldn''t copy the other unless they''d seen it at that wedding and one month isn''t enough time to pull that off (in most cases). I wouldn''t picture someone purposely copying someone based on knowing the planning info when their wedding was after the other person''s. And that if they did, they must just really LOVE the dress.

I doubt people will think they''re overly similar, at least at the actual wedding, which is all that really matters. Now if you send people pictures it might be a different story...as they''re holding them side by side. I agree though, your dress is much classier.
 

Cheekyprincess

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Oct 30, 2006
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I am tempted to ask, what is her figure like? If she is busty, that dress won''t look so good on her. Just keep an eye out on the day of what her hair/make-up looks like, and make sure yours is drastically different! That way no one will think you copied, and it is just a white dress with a fitted bodice and a ballgown skirt- same as 60% of brides (I made that figure up, but you know what I mean).
 

tiffanytwisted

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Date: 12/20/2006 10:35:45 PM
Author: robbie3982
She has seen mine. I think you guys are right. I probably shouldn''t discuss any more wedding details, though I don''t think she''s purposely trying to copy. I know our weddings will be different and mine will be great no matter what hers is like, but if you came to mine a month after hers, would you think i copied her dress?
No, I actually like yours better. I think the neckline is more flattering and I think there is a enough of a difference re straps vs strapless that people aren''t going to remember the details of the embroidery.
 

ephemery1

Brilliant_Rock
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Oh my goodness, THIS GIRL IS SO ANNOYING... how did you respond when she showed you the dress??

I am in awe of how her mind works... she's like a delusional 6 year old.


Bottomline, your dress is going to be better... it fits you perfectly, and everyone in your family knows you've already had it for months, so there's no danger of thinking you've copied. So relax and just enjoy the fact that she thinks yours looks SO good on you, that she sought out a similar one... that's a compliment!!
 

firebirdgold

Ideal_Rock
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That girl is just amazing! She totally copied your dress! Down to the inverted pleats and beading!! I''m just in awe of her %!^@#y little mind!
We noticed, but I doubt your guests will with a months difference. Besides, Christa and psaddict are right, no one will notice the rest of the dress with the way her boobs are hanging out!
LOL
 

robbie3982

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Thanks everyone. She is rather well endowed, so she will be showing some serious cleavage. She hasn''t actually tried the dress on, so there''s hope that she''ll get something completely different.
 

Jas12

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May 16, 2006
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She''s totally trying to copy you! So I decided to break it down


a) jealousy rage = she bad mouths you at a family function
b) nagging jealous thoughts = pressure on her boyfriend to propose
c) jealous ''comeback'' 1 = try to make robbie jealous by chossing a really over the top venue
d) jealous ''comeback'' 2 = try to make robbie enraged by marrying exactly a month before
e) jealous belittlement = make robbie the ''flower girl''
f) jealous comeback 3 (based on backfire of jealous belittlement) = copy robbie''s dress

um, ya, so I don''t think I am reading into it too much. From someone who has had similar experiences with a close friend (who later came clean about it) I think the writing is on the wall. Problem is, she''s not getting what she wants from you--you are stying cool, acting nice etc. etc. and that must just eat at her!

to copy is to flatter....but hell, I would be pissed, she''s nutty. Just keep doing what your doing Robbie and have fun planning your own day--not something you copied off someone else!
 

RoseAngel04

Brilliant_Rock
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865
Oh my she it totally trying to copy you! Wow...that''s a low blow!
 

dtnyc

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Jul 27, 2005
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1,082
Robbie-
The skirts are very similar.
Hopefully the dress will look like crap on her- also her mind could totally change when she goes into the store and she sees other dresses. I wouldn''t freak out until after she has purchased this dress.
I feel your pain - my SIL is pulling the same thing w/ me. I wore a very unique style dress w/ a trumpet skirt/v-neck and now the dress that she really wants is the same style. Remarkable because before our wedding she always said she wanted a strapless Vera Wang gown- I guess I must have inspired her! It pisses me off because I am one of those people who doesn''t want to look like everyone else and I thought my dress was very fashion forward, so when she sent me a pic of the dress she liked I was pissed- I feel her wearing the same style will take away from the uniqueness that was my dress. Also she is saying that she wants this style because she is so "slim" which is just obnoxious- who says that?

When she started mentioning that she liked V-neck dresses, I said "oh like mine" and she acted totally dumb and said- "oh yours was V-neck- I didn''t notice."

And now she is making me wear brown polyester (honestly I would prefer being a flower girl and wearing a cute dress!) it''s my nightmare!
 

Aloros

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May 2, 2006
Messages
947
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, right? I''d laugh it off. It seems like your cousin is trying to so hard to be like you because she''s so envious. Who cares if she even picks the same exact dress? She''s changing her name to Skywalker, for goodness'' sake (and this is from the nerdiest of nerds!)! Even if her wedding is an exact replica of yours, you''ve got what she''ll never have: CLASS. And believe me, it shows. Quit worrying!
 

mercoledi

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Jun 20, 2006
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Yikes! Well, we all know how dress shipping goes, odds are she won''t even end up with it. I suggest you stop telling her anything about your wedding though, it''s getting kinda wierd. Wasn''t she not really going to have a wedding at first? Whatever. Yours will be far more beautiful and appropriate.
 

gailrmv

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Yeah, she is blatantly copying you, IMHO. But I prefer your dress.
 

Mara

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Date: 12/20/2006 10:13:27 PM
Author: Aurelia
Try to think of it this way. They''re both white. They''re both wedding dresses. END OF DISCUSSION!

Really - you''re going to kill yourself worrying about similarities/comparisons between your wedding and hers.

TRY to stop COMPARING!
Can''t even say how strongly I agree with this post.
 

TravelingGal

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 29, 2004
Messages
17,193
Date: 12/21/2006 1:31:45 PM
Author: Mara

Date: 12/20/2006 10:13:27 PM
Author: Aurelia
Try to think of it this way. They''re both white. They''re both wedding dresses. END OF DISCUSSION!

Really - you''re going to kill yourself worrying about similarities/comparisons between your wedding and hers.

TRY to stop COMPARING!
Can''t even say how strongly I agree with this post.
Me three!

No one remembers your dress (except for maybe your mother). No one. They know it''s white. They know you look pretty. That''s about the end of it. What''s important is how you feel in it, and we already know how much you love it.

All people remember about my dress (from the comments I got afterwards) is that it was location-appropriate (they remembered it was white and flowy) and that it was cheap (because I told everyone how much it cost...hehehe.)
 

Tacori E-ring

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Date: 12/21/2006 1:39:43 PM
Author: TravelingGal
Date: 12/21/2006 1:31:45 PM

Author: Mara


Date: 12/20/2006 10:13:27 PM

Author: Aurelia

Try to think of it this way. They''re both white. They''re both wedding dresses. END OF DISCUSSION!


Really - you''re going to kill yourself worrying about similarities/comparisons between your wedding and hers.


TRY to stop COMPARING!
Can''t even say how strongly I agree with this post.
Me three!


No one remembers your dress (except for maybe your mother). No one. They know it''s white. They know you look pretty. That''s about the end of it. What''s important is how you feel in it, and we already know how much you love it.
I agree. You are driving yourself crazy. Just IGNORE her and ENJOY your wedding planning. We told you not to share any details with her or her mother from the start.
 

flopkins

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ok whenever anyone says anything about worrying that dresses look too similar, I have to share this story (i''m sure I''ve posted it before here)

A friend of mine bought a dress, wore it for her wedding, and then lent it out to a few other gals, including her cousin. At her cousin''s wedding, my friends''s OWN MOM said, oh, cousin''s dress looks really great on her!! And friend was like uh, Mom, Thats MY dress!!!!!


Let me tell you, we stress so much about these kind of things but I really doubt many ppl look that closely. For ex, I try to remember what my friends'' gowns looked like, I really have no idea. I mean, I can kinda picture the general thing, maybe remember the neckline, but the details? No way! (Except for maybe my BF''s dress, cuz she had major drama w/it... and I was MOH.. but that''s another story!)
 

TravelingGal

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Date: 12/21/2006 2:39:24 PM
Author: flopkins
ok whenever anyone says anything about worrying that dresses look too similar, I have to share this story (i''m sure I''ve posted it before here)

A friend of mine bought a dress, wore it for her wedding, and then lent it out to a few other gals, including her cousin. At her cousin''s wedding, my friends''s OWN MOM said, oh, cousin''s dress looks really great on her!! And friend was like uh, Mom, Thats MY dress!!!!!


Let me tell you, we stress so much about these kind of things but I really doubt many ppl look that closely. For ex, I try to remember what my friends'' gowns looked like, I really have no idea. I mean, I can kinda picture the general thing, maybe remember the neckline, but the details? No way! (Except for maybe my BF''s dress, cuz she had major drama w/it... and I was MOH.. but that''s another story!)
Hahaha, that is funny. Yeah, I don''t even think my husband can remember what your dress looks like.

And I agree with the poster who said don''t share any more info with her. I call your cousin PB&J. (Psycho B*tch and Jealous!)
 

Hopes

Rough_Rock
Joined
Dec 7, 2006
Messages
97
Huh, that's true! Of the weddings I've gone to I really don't remember what the brides' dresses looked like. They were white, yes, long, yes, but I don't remember much besides that. Does that make me weird? O.O

The cousin is definitely something else. I'd say jealous doesn't even describe it... she's absolutely crazy! Jealousy doesn't drive someone to insist on marriage when they had no such plans previously, say such nasty things and copy someone else's wedding plans. It has to be insanity.
 

FireGoddess

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 25, 2005
Messages
12,145
I definitely think your dress looks nicer, though the similarities are quite uncanny. I think mum''s the word on ANY more of your wedding decisions!!!
 

gail013

Shiny_Rock
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Sep 21, 2006
Messages
335
Well I guess it''s just the petty part of me, but I would want to ''share'' some detail that was really stupid, one that you would never do, and let her run with it
.

The neckline on the dress she likes looks too much like it belongs on a cocktail dress.
 

AChiOAlumna

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 10, 2005
Messages
1,678
While there are many similarities, I think it''s the highest form of flattery that your cousin found something so like your dress. She obviously treasures your opinion and your beautiful sense of style!
 
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