HELP! How do I teach a 3 year old to wipe?!?!?!?!

[Bella_mezzo]

DS is 3 3/4 and will be starting full day NYC public preK in a few weeks.

DH and I just realized that we don't think that although the potty is in the classroom, we don't think that they help with wiping.

$%^&!

So, how do we teach DS to wipe himself?

He has some tummy issues, so almost all his poops are massive and explosive. he won't just have a few streaks in his undies if he isn't wiped, he'll have a major situation...

He can lift up the seat and pee standing up on his own, he can wash his hands--though he like to run the water for a looong time and still doesn't always rinse the soap off--he will go to the potty, sit down and poop no problem, but the wiping...not so much. The few times he has tried have not been successful.

How do we teach him?

 

[mia1181]

Hey Bella this is a skill that I work on sometimes with my clients. There are a few different methods we use, but I'm not sure from your description what part your DS is stuck on. Does he try and just lacks the awareness of whether he has done a good job? if so, that's the hardest part to teach because we can't easily describe to a young child how it should feel to be clean. Some tips that might help:

1. Every chance you and DH get where DS is in the bathroom with you model to him your wiping and explain what you are doing and why.

2. Always have him wipe himself and tell him when he is done. If it's really bad, you could have him wipe several times and then mommy finishes.

3. Break it down into step-by-steps beginning with how much toilet paper he should take, and how to hold it. If possible try to hand over hand wipe so that you can show him where to wipe and how much pressure to use.

4. A fun activity you can do to better explain the idea and give him practice is to spread some peanut butter on a plate and have him practice wiping it off with toilet paper. Kids usually like this game!

5. Flushable wet wipes rock! Make sure they can be flushed. Kandoo is the brand marketed to kids, but Kleenex cottonelle or other toilet paper manufacturers make others that may be easier to find or cheaper.

I'll let you know if I think of any more...

 

[mia1181]

Oh, one more thing. You could determine the number of wipes it would take to be successful and then make a rule like "always five good wipes." Most kids his age are not perfect at wiping themselves but this may get him "close enough."

 

[Logan Sapphire]

Hi Bella,

We also use flushable wipes for C. She too doesn't do the greatest job wiping, esp. with poop, so like Mia said, she takes the first crack at it (ha! Get the joke?! ) and then we follow up. Fortunately (or unfortunately for us), C. likes privacy so she only poops at home. I think a lot of kids this age have the same wiping issue, but I hear your concern if B has stomach issues.

Good luck!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Bella, does B poop at daycare ever?

hunter basically just never poops at school anyways, he prefers to be at home so he goes in the am or pm. We have not tried to teach him to wipe as I believe they help him at pre-school... though I have never asked! Now I am going to ask them about it

 

[Bella_mezzo]

He occassionally poops at daycare, but rarely. He still has some parasite issues from our life in Africa so when he does poop at daycare it is b/c he really, REALLY has to go and its a giant, explosive, sometimes bloody fiasco Left to his own devices, no he won't poop there and he'll hold it and sometimes have an accident on his way home b/c he needs to go (it's a 20 minute walk home).

day 1 of wiping bootcamp started today Thank you MIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We practiced him wiping with me holding his hand. he can reach his bum now which is a big improvement over a few months ago.

Tomorrow we will try the peanut butter practice.

Also, after 4 rounds of antibiotics that didn't make a dent in the parasite, we're now trying a probiotic and a tincture from my acupuncture clinic and *cross your finger* it seems to be helping...

In the meantime, I'll just make sure not to pack prunes for his lunch

have I mentioned how much I love my PS moms? yesterday when i told DH i was going to post on here he was like, "what?!?!? You PSers talk about EVERYTHING!"

 

[Dreamer_D]

Bella I am sure you are trying the right things for the parasite, but wanted to suggest one more thing to try if your current approach still doesn't kick the bugs butts I have a few friends who went to India in their early 20s for extended periods and both came back with parasites that took a year or more to get rid of. Western medicine did not work, but they went to see an Indian practitioner and he prescribed a treatment that is used in India and it DID work. If you haven't, perhaps try to track down a health practitioner trained in the areas where these parasites are common. I think sometimes they likely know things that western doc's don't know.

I can't believe there is not a better solution to those parasites, how terrible for him

 

[TravelingGal]

I was surprised that they don't help wipe at all at Amelia's preschool...until someone told me that's not unusual since at a certain point, teachers don't touch privates. Apparently the kids are on their won, skiddies and all.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Thanks DD-we'll see if this works and then look for another treatment from an Indian practicianer or similar.

TG- I think that we are going to get well acquainted with skiddies this year

Mia-Thank you again! We did the peanut butter on a plate practice tonight and B seemed to learn alot from it. He calls it "the poop project" but I think we'll be doing it a few more times as it's helping him get dexterity in bunching the paper and actually getting something with it.

I love that this is a diamond forum where we talk about ultra luxury jewelry...and poop/teaching kids to wipe

 

[junebug17]

I don't have any additional advice Bella, just wanted to say I hope your little guy gets better very soon!

 

[fieryred33143]

These ideas are great and I'm stealing them! DD is also learning to wipe. She also can't seem to put her underwear and pants back on. I stand over her and say "first the front, now the back, and fix" but she still ends up with her pants lopsided and her underwear mostly on one cheek

 

[Bella_mezzo]

hi Fiery! Yeah, we have a lot of one cheek wonder days here too. B busted out "mommy, I have a wedgie" the other day. I cracked up!

 

[mia1181]

Hey Bella I'm so glad you found some of the tips I gave helpful! I hope he's getting it!

 

[ponder]

Great thread! I never even thought about this until you mentioned it. DD is starting 3 year old preschool in a few weeks and I don't believe they help them either. I tried your suggestions but she really can't reach that well. I guess I'll be checking her everyday when she gets home.