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So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
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My FI is 1" shorter than I and it''s never been an issue. I wear heels all the time but I guess his regular shoes must have a good heel on them and I just dont'' notice. It puts us pretty even most of the time. But now that he''s tried on a tux and tux shoes, he''s anxious that the tux shoes have pretty low heels. I''m quite surprised at this but I wanted to see if any other women who have shorter fiances out there have gone through this. And what did you do? I do have ballerina flats that I can wear but I guess I don''t like the idea that now it''s an "issue" if I do change my mind and want to look at some of those totally drool-worthy wedding shoes that happen to have 2 or 3 inch heels.

He wants to appear taller than I on our wedding day. Bleh. I say who cares?!! But he says "me!". This is new for me as for the past 7 years, I''ve never had to worry about the heel of my shoe with him!!! He''s just not been worried about it until now.

Has anyone''s guy used lifts? This could ease this issue a bit.........although on principle I think it sucks!!!
 

poptart

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
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Men are weird sometimes
. And that''s why we indulge them... sometimes. If it''s really a big issue with him, I would just get some lifts for his shoes, or possibly find different shoes with a higher heel for him. And maybe you could compromise a little by getting a heel that isn''t four inches or something.

*M*
 

So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
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Date: 3/25/2007 1:31:02 AM
Author: poptart
Men are weird sometimes
. And that''s why we indulge them... sometimes. If it''s really a big issue with him, I would just get some lifts for his shoes, or possibly find different shoes with a higher heel for him. And maybe you could compromise a little by getting a heel that isn''t four inches or something.

*M*
Hey there :) Yeah, I say "no" to 4-inchers lol. That height would kill me after 1 hour. More my style, there are some 2.5" that rock! And I do already have my flats and they''re cute. I''m just peeved that it''s a "thing" now


I''ll do a google search for men''s formal shoes w/higher heels and also for lifts. I''d be interested to see what''s out there. I hope it''s as easy as finding shoes with higher heels. For some reason, having lifts sounds mighty unstable and uncomfortable to me.
 

poptart

Brilliant_Rock
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Does he also realize that one inch in pictures is going to look so minuscule you won''t even be able to tell? It doesn''t seem like it should bother him if no one will be able to tell! No one would probably be able to tell at the ceremony either. One inch just isn''t that much at all.

*M*
 

monarch64

Super_Ideal_Rock
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I''m actually a tall girl who''s dated guys a bit shorter than me in the past...are you maybe used to seeing your guy in gym shoes (probably 1-2" added height) or chunkier boot soles (same 1-2" height give)? Formal shoes usually are much thinner-soled and thus don''t make the most of a man''s height. However, I think there are some out there now with more rubbery, height-inducing soles! So I would say get him some good Dr. Scholl''s insoles, along with renting a shoe that has a thicker rubbery sole, and you can wear a lower heel than you are used to, or a ballet flat, to sort of even things out!
 

E B

Ideal_Rock
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I would wear flats in a heartbeat if I could. Imagine how much more comfortable you'd be! I guess I could, but I'm a full foot (technically, 14 inches) shorter than my fiance and so I'm looking for the tallest heels possible that won't make me trip and fall.

To be completely honest, in your situation, I'd wear flats. Some things are important to men and it seems height is one of them (think Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes). I wouldn't want my fiance to feel weird in front of all the guests, so I'd personally forgo the heels. There are TONS of cute flats out there.

It's up to you, of course, and I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you and your FH. I was just throwing in my $0.02.
 

diamondfan

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Even the most confident guy might be a bit self conscious on his wedding day, esp since everyone will be staring at the two of you standing next to each other for a period of time. I would look into lifts but since I am not sure how well they work or if they are comfy, they may not be a good idea. I would then skip heels, go with a great satin ballet flat with a small heel, or a kitten heel shoe. Probably would be more comfortable anyway!!!!
 

So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
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Poptart~ Good point. I''ll ask him later tomorrow about this.

Monarch~ Yeah, I just took a peek at some of his shoes and they all seem to have some serious heel action on them. It''s not like I didn''t know his true height or anything before. In fact, I know we are an inch apart.....but that really is a non-issue seeing as tho he appaently buys 3" heeled shoes and I wear usually no more than 2.5" heels to work/school (mostly flats or 1" numbers like sneaks or something). We''ve just evened ourselves out without realizing it lol.

Ebree~ You are right. I have wanted to wear flats since I started looking for gowns for thier obvious comfort :) However, sometimes it seems that flats don''t get as much styling as do those with heels so I''m seeing mostly skimmers/ballerinas and fancy-fied flip flops. I want to see Manolo Blahnik come out with a hot flat wedding-y shoe, darn it!!! (not that I would be able to afford it but.......oh.....just to look...........
). But, there I go being nonsensical again.........it is often the heel that gives the shoe its appeal. (sigh) I''m sorry you have to be so uncomfortable! It is good to hear the other side of this issue!! Have you found the shoes you will wear yet? I would love to see them if you have/when you do :)

Maybe I will launch another FLAT shoe search to find the hottest flat wedding shoe possible :) Maybe my ballerina flats wern''t "the ones" and that caused me to go astray in the first place?
. Bleh. If anyone knows of a formal men''s shoe that has a higher-than-normal heel, please pass along that info so I can let my (now asleep as if he didn''t kill my shoe dreams
) fiance know.
 

AmberWaves

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Oct 19, 2005
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So Happy, I wish I was in that situation!! I had to find the tallest shoes possible- my FI is 14" taller than I am, and no matter how tall the shoes would be- it would still be quite the distance left! I ended up getting 4.5" wedges, very cute.

Anyway, totally get flats, they may not be traditionally "sexy" but I must say that I feel sexier in comfortable flats than I do the super high heels!!

Good luck!
 

monarch64

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Girl, no problem! I never wanted to insinuate that he was keeping some detail about his heigh from you...just that in my experience men have told me they were 6'' and actually been 5''8 or something, lol! But anyway, your very honest and loving man has some chunky soles shoes and there is soooo nothing wrong with that. When it comes to your wedding day (and it is only one day!) you will probably want to make yourself a bit more diminuitive than you actually are, which will merely require a flat or kitten heeled shoe, no big deal because everyone will be staring at your dress anyway, AND will be mucho more comfortable!!! Can''t ask for much more than that! Everything is going to work out for the best and it is really all going to be fine, sis. Take care!
 

Maisie

Super_Ideal_Rock
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iheartscience

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Just to give you some flat options, I am a ballet flat fanatic, and I love ones from London Sole (londonsole.com) and French Sole (frenchsoleshoes.com).

I also love Sigerson Morrison and Belle by Sigerson Morrison flats. Both are available at zappos.com as well as a few other places online.

I think if it''s important enough to your fiance you should go ahead and wear flats. I normally would say a dude should just get over it, but it is your wedding day, and with all that attention focused on you two I can understand that he doesn''t want to feel awkward in any way. Just my 2 cents!
 

Blenheim

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 27, 2006
Messages
3,136
My fiance and I are the same height, so I decided to go with flat shoes. Normally I don''t care if I''m like 3 inches taller than him because of my shoes, but for some reason our wedding day is just different. In your case, I''d go with flats and not worry about lifts -- I don''t think an inch difference is going to be that apparent. Make sure that he stands up straight, though! (My FI often doesn''t.)

Blue Tux Shoes, flat and pointy with bow. I almost bought these.


The pointy flat I ended up buying. I got them in white leather. It''s whiter than my dress, and not satin, but at the same time that makes it a lot more rewearable. They''re pretty comfy as well.

And I know that I found more when I was searching, I just can''t remember where right now.
 

So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
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Wowzer! You guys are a resource


I love all of those ballerina flats that thing2thing suggested! And the links to myglassslipper yielded some possibilities, too! Right now, glass slipper these are ones I''d consider :)

FI and I chatted this morning about all of this and he is not opposed to getting lifts. Oh well, this isn''t a huge problem. I remember a looooong time ago, I dated a guy who was a bit shorter than I and he had a complex about it and that really annoyed me. Clearly, he and I didn''t work out so I think that now that my FI is mirroring some of that behavior, I''m a little annoyed. I''m sure he''ll be back to his nomral self directly after the wedding!

If anyone else has any flat or very low heels they''d like to share, I''d be very happy to see them
I like silver or white.
 

lehcarm

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 23, 2006
Messages
242
So, my FI is a good 4 inches taller than I am. I am planning on wearing flats just for the comfort factor. I am looking for something where I can put an arch support in. I''ve even toying with ordering these. I own them in blue, and they are super comfortable. I would totally be able to wear them again. Any opinions?

http://www.zappos.com/n/p/p/7156479/c/59246.html

Am I crazy?
 

So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2006
Messages
1,084
Omg, I really like those peep toes!! I put them in my shopping bag and everything but now I''ve gotta check to see if they have a good return policy or at least free shipping. (I''m spoilied by Zappos). Thank you!!!

Anyone have experience with JcPenny online shopping?
 

njc

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Sep 10, 2004
Messages
1,997
I'm about 2" taller than DH. He always complains (in a good way) when I wear heels. I kept teasing him I had 4" heels for the wedding. When we took pictures, he would get on his toes a little and I would bend my knees a bit, neither was obvious, just to even it out a bit. We really dont care about our height difference, but like someone else said, for some reason on your wedding day, it matters!

I wore these from Nine West (ones on the bottom). My favorite part... I still wear them! They dont scream wedding, but matched my dress like you wouldnt believe!

ETA: It took me a couple months to find these... I would just look every where that sold shoes and not limit myself to the traditional white wedding shoe since it was something I HAD to have.

 

So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
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Messages
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NJC~ Those are quite lovely :) I like the brocade (or is that paisley) look to them! Last night, FI and I figured we should measure ourselves so that if he gets lifts at all, we''d know what height he''d want to get. Turns out he is 2 inches shorter than I, not 1 inch! He can''t understand it but figures he''s either shrinking (not probable!) or was measured so long ago he can''t remember. So, since we''ve been together he and I just haven''t even given our heights a second thought; I just adored that he didn''t have a complex over it and I was thereafter blissfully in love lol.

This new finding explains why at the tux store when he had on tux shoes and I just happened to be wearing ballerina skimmers that he was still shorter than I. DUh!!! Okay, so he''s really excited about lifts and he asked me to just find a pair so he can see if they''ll be comfortable enough. I found some inexpensive ones on Ebay for about $20 so he can play around with them. We''ll go from here I guess. I got the ones that were 2.25 inches....I hope that he''ll feel okay in them!! It seems that anything less than 2" just won''t help even if I wear flats but getting ones that are 3" sounds dreadfully drastic!

I''m also concerned how these things will fit in the shoes he ends up renting or buying. They need enough heel back space, afterall.
 

dtnyc

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
1,088
My husband is only like 2 inches taller than me. I wore normal height heels but couldn''t wear my hair on top of my head or I would have looked taller than him- I wore my hair in a low bun. In pics we look almost the same height-
 

So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2006
Messages
1,084
Date: 3/26/2007 3:18:14 PM
Author: dtnyc
My husband is only like 2 inches taller than me. I wore normal height heels but couldn''t wear my hair on top of my head or I would have looked taller than him- I wore my hair in a low bun. In pics we look almost the same height-
Yeah, I just thought of that a little while ago. I probably do not need to wear the tiara if shoes are an issue now. Oh well, it didn''t cost me much.
 

Kerbear560

Shiny_Rock
Joined
May 29, 2004
Messages
439
My FI is only about 1 inch taller than me. Normally, if I''m wearing shoes with a heel, and I''m a little taller than him it''s not an issue. But, I''m with Blenheim...for some reason the wedding is just different! I actually bought two pairs of shoes- a pair of white slingbacks and a pair of gold satin flats (which I won''t post pics of because you said you wanted white or silver...unless you want me to) for if/when my feet start to hurt.

I had a really hard time finding elegant low-heeled shoes, but I was on a mission! I fell in love with the really pointy-toed look, but they all seemed to have a really high heel. I wanted a little heel, and one that wasn''t chunky. When I came across these silk satin Anne Klein''s, I just had to have them! The heel is only slightly over 1"!

AKEllen.jpg
 

amileegirl

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 17, 2006
Messages
144
My FI is only three inches taller than me and I'm nearly 5'8". I don't wear heels usually because I refuse to wear painful shoes. I found these great resort wedges that are 3 inches and they are so comfortable! I wasn't going to get them because I'm cheap and they were $45 but my FI said a good pair of shoes was worht it and told me to stop feeling guilty (he got lots of kisses).
Anyway, I put them on and I said, "Hey, honey, I'm taller than you" as I strutted around and he said, "Perfect kissing height" he kissed me and then wiggled his brows as if to say "...a little taller and..." He's such a naughty boy.

I think for some men they want to protect and if they feel smaller than the one they want to protect they don't feel like it looks like they can, I guess.
 

So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
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Date: 3/27/2007 12:51:03 AM
Author: Kerbear560
My FI is only about 1 inch taller than me. Normally, if I''m wearing shoes with a heel, and I''m a little taller than him it''s not an issue. But, I''m with Blenheim...for some reason the wedding is just different! I actually bought two pairs of shoes- a pair of white slingbacks and a pair of gold satin flats (which I won''t post pics of because you said you wanted white or silver...unless you want me to) for if/when my feet start to hurt.

I had a really hard time finding elegant low-heeled shoes, but I was on a mission! I fell in love with the really pointy-toed look, but they all seemed to have a really high heel. I wanted a little heel, and one that wasn''t chunky. When I came across these silk satin Anne Klein''s, I just had to have them! The heel is only slightly over 1''!
Okay.......THOSE are hot! I am always attracted to the pointy toed styles but with my size 9''s, they tend to make my feet look even bigger lol. But I so love them
Y''know what? I''m sick! I should just wear the shoes I already have and then splurge on some new shoes (that aren''t in white so I could actually wear them again!) for the honeymoon or something! Then, the height thing will be back to normal and we''d have our "perfect wedding pictures"


I don''t know if I posted it already but I found the Molly''s by Touch Ups to be rather darling and more bridal-y with thier lace front! What do you think about these? Touch Ups'' Molly
 

lehcarm

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 23, 2006
Messages
242
I don''t know if I posted it already but I found the Molly''s by Touch Ups to be rather darling and more bridal-y with thier lace front! What do you think about these? Touch Ups'' Molly

It doesn''t look like the Molly style would have much support at all. Maybe if you could slip an insole with arch support in them they''d be OK. I know that there is no way I could wear something like that all day, I have high arches and need the support. They sure are cute though!
 

Independent Gal

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2006
Messages
5,471
Hey, for flats, have you checked out the cook skechers Robbie is planning to wear? teeheee! but those might not be your style.

EBree and Amber how funny! M is 14 inches taller than me too! I will have to stand on a phone book or something for wedding photos.
 

AmberWaves

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Oct 19, 2005
Messages
3,672
IG, isn''t that just the funniest thing? No matter what shoes I wear, we''ll still be unbelievably far from each other. I wonder if it''s asking too much to make him stand in a hole...
 

jcrow

Ideal_Rock
Joined
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Date: 3/27/2007 5:11:45 PM
Author: AmberWaves
IG, isn''t that just the funniest thing? No matter what shoes I wear, we''ll still be unbelievably far from each other. I wonder if it''s asking too much to make him stand in a hole...
haha. i had the same problem. i wore 4" heels and i was still SHORT! sheesh!
 
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