Follow-up and thoughts

[budgetbride]

In a previous post I talked about a girlfriend who I had issues with...she was also my BM.
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/im-soooper-pissed-and-need-to-vent.50378/

The more we talked the more it seemed more confusing to me why she was mad. She kept telling me what was wrong with the MOH i did pick. When we ended our last conversation, she told me that i'd betrayed our friendship and we would never be the same. The words hit me hard...partly because I felt this was all blown out of porportion. Even if they were out of anger, why not talk to me for months!
Well we hadn't talked since October until now. Another friend opened up the door way to let us get issues out. I basically told her I didn't understand why she made everything into a big deal and now we are here. The gist of her argument is that we are both to blame.(i don't agree but whatever) Well in my last email to her, I told her that she shouldn't worry about being in the wedding anymore, instead we need to focus on becoming friends again. I "think" I want to be her friend...I just wouldn't feel right by having her pay money and everything else right now.The thing about me is that if I'm angry or hurt I really can't fake a relationship with you and that's what I'd be doing if I let her continue her duties. What do you think? What would you have done?

 

[sarie_j]

Well, it sounds like maybe now she realizes that she blew things way out of proportion and is trying to drag you into the blame too, to try and not look bad -- I''m not sure without knowing every single word that was exchanged but if you''re not comfortable with her then don''t try to keep her in your wedding. The last thing you want is a strained relationship weighing on you when you have shopping or planning trips with your attendants, or your other attendants feeling as if they are caught in the middle. I agree that asking her to step down or simply not allowing her to return may not be a pleasant situation, however when you look at everyone''s feelings together it may be the best thing. I''m sorry you''re still having troubles, but let us know what happens..

 

[anchor31]

What is it with friends and families and weddings?? I''m sorry this is happening... It''s not like you''re not involving her at all, you still asked her to be a BM, and MOH/BM are just titles... She might have realized her childish behaviour, I don''t know. I think the best thing you can do is sit down with her and talk this through.