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Feel kinda awful....

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purelily

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jun 23, 2008
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So, my SO just let it slip today that he had his heart set on one of the Harry Winston rings I had posted in an earlier thread. I had asked him not to purchase it because, though gorgeous, I didn't want him to spend that much money. We ended up buying a Harry Winston replica for much less instead. Originally, that was my dream ring, but then i realized it was so much, i couldn't let him spend it. So, he bought me the custom ring.
He said he is happy with our purchase but he loved the story behind the other one. Taking me to Disneyland then to Beverly Hills and we chose our dream ring.

I just feel horrible.

Here is the thread with the diamond ring we were looking at Harry Winston Tryst (its number 2)

Here is the thread with what we bought:
Harry Winston Replica

It was a .7 E vvs2 Round, but we just bought a .94 F VS1 Cushion


What would you do if you found this out?
 
Not sure I follow. Are you asking how we would feel if we found out our SOs liked the story behind a ring we didn't buy? Are you asking because you can still back out of the custom ring?
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Do you feel bad because you talked him out of getting the ring he liked the best and now you have realised that you want that one too?

I think the ring you are getting is beautiful btw.

(is it too late to change?)
 
Keep in mind you still *chose* the ring on that trip to Beverly Hills, but this ring is even MORE special because no one out there will have one exactly like it--it was made for the two of you!
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I don''t get it either....what do you feel bad about?
Changing your mind, or having to compromise for $$ sake??
 
I guess I feel a bit guilty for wrenching the whole ring process away from him. Honestly, the ring I'm getting is *the* one I wanted and never thought would be in our price range. So, I'm more than excited about it :)

The other ring was out of our budget (way over budget) and beautiful, but it was what he would have chosen for me if left to his own devices. I am happy he didn't purchase the other one because an put the extra money towards savings (and I am so much more in love with this one!)! :) But, on the other hand, I just feel like maybe I've strong armed the process ;)

Thank you for all your help and questions :) I know this seems a little silly.

after writing the post, i asked him if he was upset or disappointed that he wasn't able to get *his* dream ring (he has said he loved the other one), but he said no. The one I chose is more practical and if I love it that is all that matters.

I guess the question is.. Would you feel guilty? or am I being silly? :)
 
Sweetheart, you''re being silly. I agree with the others about this ring you''re getting custom is made just for the two of you! And within the budget instead of going way over! My FI knew that if he spent about $10k which was the budget on my ring, I''d ask him to return it even though it''s my dream ring. He managed to get me my ring for way under! There''s nothing wrong being practical pricewise on your e-ring. You will have other expenses coming up like the wedding you need to think about as well. And don''t forget the economy! I am very proud of my FI for finding an awesome deal with my ring and I know he tells his friends and everyone is surprise at how well he did. I am happy that he wasn''t taken advantage of in the e-ring process.
 
Date: 9/3/2009 2:07:20 PM
Author: Luckyeshe
Sweetheart, you''re being silly. I agree with the others about this ring you''re getting custom is made just for the two of you! And within the budget instead of going way over! My FI knew that if he spent about $10k which was the budget on my ring, I''d ask him to return it even though it''s my dream ring. He managed to get me my ring for way under! There''s nothing wrong being practical pricewise on your e-ring. You will have other expenses coming up like the wedding you need to think about as well. And don''t forget the economy! I am very proud of my FI for finding an awesome deal with my ring and I know he tells his friends and everyone is surprise at how well he did. I am happy that he wasn''t taken advantage of in the e-ring process.
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agreed.

He got you the ring you wanted and he''s happy about it! Don''t beat yourself up over the details. Better to get your money''s worth (and love it!).
 
I''m pretty sure I get how you''re feeling. Is it that you wanted the feeling of him picking the one he chose for you, with the Disneyland/Beverley Hills story - ie the whole romantic fairy tale "he did it all himself" vibe?

You know, I think that feeling would have faded quickly. Imagine if you''d bought the Harry Winston - would you feel guilty about the money you could have saved, and that you could have got a much larger diamond if you''d gone custom?

I agree with the other posters that you should focus on your ring being unique and special because you developed it together. You still have the romantic backstory of picking out the design at Harry Winston together - it''s just you went one step further and got a gorgeous custom one inspired by it!
 
I could see where guilt is coming in. I mean, as you said the other ring would have been the one he purchased had you stayed out of it. But it sure is darn hard to be a PS member (diamond lover) and NOT stay out of the process. Rats!

I think the custom ring is gorgeous. It fits within your budget! If you are happy with it, then don''t worry about it at all and move on from here. If your guy still loves the Harry Winston and that''s what you really want, then cancel the custom or sell it and find what your heart is really set on and get that instead.
 
IMO, the reason he may feel disappointed about the situation, is because not because that was HIS dream ring so much as he loved it because he thinks/thought it was YOUR dream ring. And now he feels like he wasn''t able to get you what you truly wanted. So, it seems like if you show/tell him how much you adore the ring you are getting, and make it well known to him that you truly love your custom ring better and are happier with it than you would''ve been with the harry winston...then he will come around and realize that he actually did get you your dream ring!!

And btw...CONGRATS!
 
Date: 9/3/2009 10:13:14 PM
Author: pluck15
IMO, the reason he may feel disappointed about the situation, is because not because that was HIS dream ring so much as he loved it because he thinks/thought it was YOUR dream ring. And now he feels like he wasn''t able to get you what you truly wanted. So, it seems like if you show/tell him how much you adore the ring you are getting, and make it well known to him that you truly love your custom ring better and are happier with it than you would''ve been with the harry winston...then he will come around and realize that he actually did get you your dream ring!!


And btw...CONGRATS!
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That''s what I was thinking too! It is a very beautiful ring, too.
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Hi Everyone! :)

Thank you very much for answering me on this post. I know now I was being silly :)

Honestly, I''m SO excited at seeing my ring. (especially after seeing Luckyeshe''s in person *drool*)

a cushion halo is going to be perfect!!!! :)

Plus, he''ll get over it when I start drooling again right?
 
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