shape
carat
color
clarity

Family Member Driving me Nuts!

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
4,651
Just wanted to say that he is my uncle and is very elderly, and I know a lot of people have said "Cut him loose" but I don't want to leave him alone at Christmas just because he has a weird speech that comes out every so often. I'd rather try to remind myself that I just can't take any notice of his ramblings. It's not like I have to see him much - and yes, he can be a bully, and I can't explain his treatment of his family. But he has done nice stuff for me in my life. Once, I was working in a kitchen when I was 16 in the school summer and this chemical they always used made my hands peel. He told me to quit the job and gave me some money to make up for the lost wage as he didn't want my hands to suffer. Another time, I needed extra tuition in French to get into college, and he arranged for that with a French professor he knew, and another time he gave me a rabbit which my parents wouldn't let me have, so it lived at his house. He has been nice to me in the past. It's a pity he has to behave this way now.
 

packrat

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 12, 2008
Messages
10,614
I'd probably just be a rag back at him. "Well then tell me, Oh Great Swami Nanda, Knower of All Things, what do you suggest I do to fix what you feel is wrong w/me?" And I'd do it w/much fan fare and dramatics. :praise: :saint: "Well, yanno, you seem to take great pains to point out what you think are my problems and how I messed up my life, can you just lay off me for a while? Please? It just gets old after a while, dontcha think? I have enough shit going on in my life and have enough anxiety about myself, I don't need you making it worse with your Speech of Doom"
 

stracci2000

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 26, 2007
Messages
6,872
Why not level with him.

When he comes through your door, greet him warmly.
Then tell him that he's your uncle, and you care about him. It kinda sounds like you do care, a little bit.
Tell him how you are so happy that he came, etc. Lie through your teeth, if you must.
Then sit him down and tell him that you would love for this holiday to be wonderful, and could he be so kind as to NOT
give the Speech of Doom. When he says "What do you mean?", you will say, "You know, when you start in on all that old stuff that makes everyone uncomfortable. I would prefer that you don't do that." Explain in detail if he feigns ignorance. Be firm. Just tell him that you won't have it.
Don't say that it's just you that becomes upset, include the whole family.

Then, if he does start into that, say over dinner, speak up and stop him before he gets started. Say "Excuse me Uncle, but I think we discussed this before, and you agreed--remember? Please don't." Be firm, and don't allow him to start.

Maybe if you are kind to him, and asked him nicely, but firmly, maybe he will comply.
Take the bull by the horns, and just don't let him.
 

Rockinruby

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 27, 2013
Messages
2,740
Jambalaya, I just want to say that I understand the need to vent. Life is hard and people can be very frustrating at times. :wall: I hope you will be able to have a good Holiday somehow. :wavey:
 

VRBeauty

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 2, 2006
Messages
10,925
Jambalaya - I respect your willingness to host your uncle in spite of his picking on you. I hope one of my nieces or nephews will do the same for me when I'm old and crotchety.

I also have to admit to rolling my eyes when I saw the title of this thread - because you do seem to have a lot of them. It could be that you have more than your share of nasty users in your life, or it could be that you could do a better job of setting boundaries.

In this case setting boundaries doesn't have to mean un-inviting your uncle... it could just be putting the brakes on "the speech of doom." You could do it when it comes up, or you could do it pre-emptively. I'd suggest the latter since you can plan in advance and you'll be in control, rather than reacting. Write it down some bullet points beforehand, sit him down with a glass of wine when he arrives, and let him know that you're laying down some ground rules to keep the visit pleasant for both of you. It'll probably be a gut-wrenching half hour or so, but that beats having your stomach tied up in knots for the whole visit in anticipation of little snipes.

BTW I was the subject of some nasty bullying by a family recently, at a most inappropriate time... so I totally understand your need to vent. I hope you'll also give some consideration to the insights and advice others here are offering.
 

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
4,651
packrat|1447290024|3948497 said:
I'd probably just be a rag back at him. "Well then tell me, Oh Great Swami Nanda, Knower of All Things, what do you suggest I do to fix what you feel is wrong w/me?" And I'd do it w/much fan fare and dramatics. :praise: :saint: "Well, yanno, you seem to take great pains to point out what you think are my problems and how I messed up my life, can you just lay off me for a while? Please? It just gets old after a while, dontcha think? I have enough shit going on in my life and have enough anxiety about myself, I don't need you making it worse with your Speech of Doom"

Thanks, Packrat. He was quite status-conscious when he was younger and I think he probably reckons I should be some big-shot, because that would reflect well on him. However, I am happy how I am. In the absence of external problems like family illnesses, I am very content to care for others as I am not very ambitious - last time I checked that wasn't a crime, and I'm fine with it! If he thinks I have messed my life up or have problems, that is news to me! This stuff is all in his head. Since there is nothing real to criticize about me, he just has to make something up. The job which was very busy and corporate, together with the corporate weight gain, was 23 years ago. He's got nothing on me, nothing to bully. I lead a blameless life caring for others and hurting nobody, so he just says ridiculous things.
 

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
4,651
stracci2000|1447290407|3948506 said:
Why not level with him.

When he comes through your door, greet him warmly.
Then tell him that he's your uncle, and you care about him. It kinda sounds like you do care, a little bit.
Tell him how you are so happy that he came, etc. Lie through your teeth, if you must.
Then sit him down and tell him that you would love for this holiday to be wonderful, and could he be so kind as to NOT
give the Speech of Doom. When he says "What do you mean?", you will say, "You know, when you start in on all that old stuff that makes everyone uncomfortable. I would prefer that you don't do that." Explain in detail if he feigns ignorance. Be firm. Just tell him that you won't have it.
Don't say that it's just you that becomes upset, include the whole family.

Then, if he does start into that, say over dinner, speak up and stop him before he gets started. Say "Excuse me Uncle, but I think we discussed this before, and you agreed--remember? Please don't." Be firm, and don't allow him to start.

Maybe if you are kind to him, and asked him nicely, but firmly, maybe he will comply.
Take the bull by the horns, and just don't let him.


That is a very good idea, Stracci. Maybe I will do that. I would mostly enjoy his company while I still have him if it were not for the Speech of Doom. Perhaps I will point out to him that the time period he's referring to was 23 years ago. Mind you, when I pointed out that the babies were almost ten years old, he seemed to think that wasn't long enough to lose baby weight. He just gets in these moods where you can't reason with him.
 

PintoBean

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 27, 2011
Messages
6,584
Monarch is on point about the reaction.

Can you look at this from a positive place? You are important enough for him to deliver a speech. Its his convoluted way of expressing that he gives a damn. And when he finishes his speech, maybe he wants to see you annoyed, pissed off, etc, bc maybe he thinks these reactions mean he's getting through to you? So then he feels motivated to lather rinse and repeat.

Could you laugh it off when he's done, and say something like, it wouldn't be the holidays without your signature speech. I'm glad that that's all that is wrong with me uncle, so I'm feeling pretty fab right now!
 

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
4,651
Rockinruby|1447290958|3948512 said:
Jambalaya, I just want to say that I understand the need to vent. Life is hard and people can be very frustrating at times. :wall: I hope you will be able to have a good Holiday somehow. :wavey:

Yes, and yes. Thank you for being so nice.
 

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
4,651
VRBeauty|1447296914|3948569 said:
Jambalaya - I respect your willingness to host your uncle in spite of his picking on you. I hope one of my nieces or nephews will do the same for me when I'm old and crotchety.

I also have to admit to rolling my eyes when I saw the title of this thread - because you do seem to have a lot of them. It could be that you have more than your share of nasty users in your life, or it could be that you could do a better job of setting boundaries.

In this case setting boundaries doesn't have to mean un-inviting your uncle... it could just be putting the brakes on "the speech of doom." You could do it when it comes up, or you could do it pre-emptively. I'd suggest the latter since you can plan in advance and you'll be in control, rather than reacting. Write it down some bullet points beforehand, sit him down with a glass of wine when he arrives, and let him know that you're laying down some ground rules to keep the visit pleasant for both of you. It'll probably be a gut-wrenching half hour or so, but that beats having your stomach tied up in knots for the whole visit in anticipation of little snipes.

BTW I was the subject of some nasty bullying by a family recently, at a most inappropriate time... so I totally understand your need to vent. I hope you'll also give some consideration to the insights and advice others here are offering.

Thank you VRBeauty! Excellent points, all. Regarding the hosting, he is not always bad and can be very helpful in the house despite his age, and for me in this case, cutting him loose isn't really what I want. I just want the Speech of Doom to stop, I don't want to be a family who doesn't speak.

About me having a lot of these threads, I'm just having one of those mid-life periods where many people around you get sick and die. It's happened in earlier middle age for me rather than later middle age - just the roll of the dice, and it's also happened in a three-year cluster. I'm hoping this means that I get much of it over with sooner! But it's been intense, and some relationships haven't survived it, especially with those whose families are all fit and healthy. (Many people have both parents until they're in their sixties. I know one family where the parents are in their eighties, the kid in their fifties and sixties, and there are grandkids. There is not one single case of cancer or illness in the whole family.) I apologize if I made you roll your eyes at the sight of my thread. I do post wanting advice because people here are so experienced and my world has changed a lot in the last three years. And usually I'd ask the tribal elders, but they're not here anymore.
 

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
4,651
PintoBean|1447302470|3948617 said:
Monarch is on point about the reaction.

Can you look at this from a positive place? You are important enough for him to deliver a speech. Its his convoluted way of expressing that he gives a damn. And when he finishes his speech, maybe he wants to see you annoyed, pissed off, etc, bc maybe he thinks these reactions mean he's getting through to you? So then he feels motivated to lather rinse and repeat.

Could you laugh it off when he's done, and say something like, it wouldn't be the holidays without your signature speech. I'm glad that that's all that is wrong with me uncle, so I'm feeling pretty fab right now!


This made me laugh, PintoBean. I do try hard not to react, to keep my voice steady and chat about other things, because I do believe that when someone gets at you, they do want a reaction. Humor is a great lubricant, you're right. Yeah, his signature speech. His mother had a signature speech, too, and we still refer to it as her Doomed At Birth speech. She would pick an item out of the paper involving some unfortunate family where perhaps they were on the poverty line and the kids had turned to petty crime or whatever, and she'd say, "These children are doomed at birth! Dooomed!" And she said it a lot, and then not long before she died it turned into "These children are doomed from the moment of conception!"

Because, y'know, the thought of anyone overcoming their background and giving them necessary support to do so is unthinkable. They're all doooooomed!

Oh, and I spoke to his sister the other day, who is a cheery little soul. She was widowed three years ago, has tons of kids and grandkids quite near, goes on lots of vacations and has a cute rescue dog and a very funny little bird who talks. But she says to me, "It's a lonely old life and it doesn't get any better!" That's her strapline - "It doesn't get any better!" At least I never have to have her for the holidays!!
 

LLJsmom

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 24, 2012
Messages
12,187
I guess there are two choices, either cut contact or suck it up and deal with it. I don't mean to say that in a mean way. I do think that Kenny is right, and life is short. I would rather cut out people than be bitter and resentful of other people for taking away my happiness.n good luck Jambalaya.
 

LAJennifer

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 2, 2005
Messages
2,029
Jambalaya|1447283033|3948405 said:
kenny|1447282869|3948402 said:
Jambalaya, you have lots of these threads.

Nobody can drive you nuts unless you let them.

Clearly you've been taught lots of stuff that doesn't work for you.
I recommend adjusting yourself so people can't drive you nuts so often.

Excellent advice. Any tips?

There's an of Montreal song for that. Start with this one: https://youtu.be/LPKw94eVG_k
 

packrat

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 12, 2008
Messages
10,614
Tell him he's lucky you're such a caring person and not a slave to some big shot career so when he's old and gray and needing someone to help him out, take care of him and such, you'll be around to do it.
 

House Cat

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 22, 2009
Messages
4,555
I am really a head-on kind of gal. I never do passive aggressive, I am more of an aggressive-aggressive type. This is why I say that I would drop the guy, tell the family, give them the choice to pick him up, and eat pie.


But...

I have seen others "handle" people like this in an artful way. It almost looks like a dance. My husband is really good at this, so is my dad. Ok, here it is:

Speech of doom starts -- You quickly interrupt and change the subject with a subject about him that he will find even more interesting than the speech. This way he won't go back to it quickly.

Speech of doom starts again -- You quickly excuse yourself to use the restroom, do something in the kitchen, straighten a bed, make a phone call, count the hairs on your head, paint your toenails, etc...

Speech of doom starts again -- You get up and say, "oh my goodness, I forgot I have to run to the store!" grab your keys and go

You never let more than a couple of words of the speech come out of his mouth before you interrupt it and change the subject or leave.

The point is that you are taking charge of this situation now. There is no reason for you to sit and take his insults just because he is your uncle or because he is older. It is that thinking that is causing you the most harm. It is ok to stand up for yourself against anyone who is giving you that awful feeling inside. You deserve to be emotionally safe at all times.
 

chrono

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 22, 2004
Messages
38,214
I have many relatives like this. I only share the bare minimum of information, nod here and there to appease them (this usually works and will shorten the speech), smile and move on. If you let it affect you, it will. If you shrug it off, it won't. It takes time to perfect this skill so keep working at it.
 

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
4,651
So much excellent advice, which is why I asked here. Reading through it all again, I don't accept that if someone makes me feel bad on occasion, it's all my fault for having them in my life, because it's not a constant or even frequent behavior. I addressed this in another thread a few weeks ago, that you can teach someone to treat you all you like but there is just no reasoning with some people when they get a bee in their bonnets. "Teach them how to treat you" only works with people who are at least somewhat reasonable, and sometimes people have moods or times when they are not reasonable. I think of it as my uncle's fits. I also think it's completely understandable and natural to feel bad when someone acts like an a$$ toward you, so I don't accept any blame for that. And it's not always practical or desirable to cut someone loose. There is a saying about throwing the baby out with the bathwater - that you throw away the good with the bad. He is not always having one of his fits, and has helped me in many other ways. Just the other day, he was being really supportive. Go figure.

Chrono - thank you for understanding that not letting someone get to you is a life skill that takes a lot of practice. I've never been that good at it because I seethe with the injustice of it. That is, I don't go around making remarks designed to make others feel bad, and I don't expect others to do that to me, either. You wouldn't believe the amount of friends/acquaintances I've tossed out because they started being verbally bitchy, which tended to happen after a success of some kind. I do not bitch at others and I do not expect to be bitched at, either. It's very hard for me to understand where the desire comes from to just lash out at someone who has done nothing to you. That is not in my nature so it's something I find it very difficult to swallow in others, and I am not very forgiving of that trait in friends. Since my uncle has many good points when he's not having a fit, I think for me the solution is to keep reminding myself that he's crazy and not to let it get to me. Thank you so much for the encouragement with that. The "bare information" bit is also valuable and I must remember that, because I like to share with others as a way of bonding - I'm naturally quite open.

House Cat - I found your post very interesting indeed. Some of these things are indeed a dance. I like the way you describe it as artful. I had quite forgotten that many years ago, I used the exact technique you describe with a sibling who would start on me, and it was indeed very effective. It worked and so it's been a long time since I've had to use it. I don't bother with friends - if they turn bitchy they're out, but family members are more entrenched in your life. (And before anybody tells me the solution is to just dump all my family, family has been a godsend during the last three years and for me, blood has proved mostly thicker than water.) HC, I applaud the way that you can see there is more than just one way, or your own way, to deal with a problem.

LAJennifer and LLJSMom, thanks for your help. Packrat - he's already old and gray! Well, white actually. He could be Santa at a department store, except he'd depress all the kids!
 

smitcompton

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 11, 2006
Messages
2,989
Hi,

I actually don't see this as an unsolvable problem. Somewhere along the road, he either heard you tell your story about weight or it was discussed by others in his presence, Its in his brain and he can't get it out. Your weight is not his concern. Tell him so. Tell him the topic is not up for discussion anymore, ever. As long as you sound calm, no-one will be angry at that. I have some topics that are not up for, discussion and I say so. People don't get angry. You must have had some people say to you, at the very least, I don't want to talk about it now. Same kinda thing. Just tell him its not up for discussion by him any more.

Years ago when I had a long stint in the hospital, I used to smoke in the designated smoking area. One day an elderly gentleman began to lecture me on smoking. I looked at him and asked him if I knew him? He said no. I said since this is a designated smoking area why he thought he could or should lecture me on smoking. He looked astonished, and apologized. He said, "you're right". We met there again and I didn't have to listen to his lecture again.

Just tell the man there will be n0 discussion about your weight. If you have to go further, tell him he's being rude.

Annette
 

december-fire

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 3, 2013
Messages
2,385
Jambalaya, you've received some good advice. My comments may not fall into that category, but here goes. :lol:

I came across the following quote (there was a picture of a lion, but I can't figure out how to post the image! Ha!).
"If you expect the world to be fair with you because you are fair, you're fooling yourself. That's like expecting the lion not to eat you because you didn't eat him."

Just because you are considerate, generous, whatever, don't think that means everyone will treat you the same way. The 'Do unto others' does not mean that others will necessarily treat you in the same manner. Trying to 'put yourself in the other person's shoes' doesn't usually shed light on a situation because you're probably transferring your values. The person's actions/words are based on their values/priorities/objectives, not yours. So the fact that you would never say anything hurtful to someone is absolutely irrelevant to what others say or do. People are not mirror images of you.

An unreasonable person is not going to suddenly become reasonable just because you try to reason with them.

Your uncle's speech upset you. If you want to continue to have him in your life, and if you accept the premise that you probably can't change him, then think about the fact that his comments say more about him than you. Smile, nod, shrug, whatever, and ask him if he'd like a cup of tea and go put the kettle on. Don't engage, argue, debate or give yourself an ulcer. Will it accomplish anything? He's not going to change.

All that being said, I like to be up-front, honest and direct in a respectful manner. But know your audience. If, in the past, you've tried discussing this matter with your uncle and he doesn't seem to get it, then let it go.

And, finally, I agree with boundaries and therapy.
 

azstonie

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 1, 2014
Messages
3,769
Jambalaya|1447287685|3948468 said:
Just wanted to say that he is my uncle and is very elderly, and I know a lot of people have said "Cut him loose" but I don't want to leave him alone at Christmas just because he has a weird speech that comes out every so often. I'd rather try to remind myself that I just can't take any notice of his ramblings. It's not like I have to see him much - and yes, he can be a bully, and I can't explain his treatment of his family. But he has done nice stuff for me in my life. Once, I was working in a kitchen when I was 16 in the school summer and this chemical they always used made my hands peel. He told me to quit the job and gave me some money to make up for the lost wage as he didn't want my hands to suffer. Another time, I needed extra tuition in French to get into college, and he arranged for that with a French professor he knew, and another time he gave me a rabbit which my parents wouldn't let me have, so it lived at his house. He has been nice to me in the past. It's a pity he has to behave this way now.

Okay, now I understand why you are cutting him slack. I do. Those were good things he did for you.

Here's the thing: When the Speech of Doom gets started, YOU move to another room, you turn on the TV or the stereo, etc. You don't have to listen :lol: When its over, TV is off/stereo is off/you're back in the room.
 

jess719

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jan 12, 2012
Messages
137
Jambalaya|1447287685|3948468 said:
Just wanted to say that he is my uncle and is very elderly, and I know a lot of people have said "Cut him loose" but I don't want to leave him alone at Christmas just because he has a weird speech that comes out every so often. I'd rather try to remind myself that I just can't take any notice of his ramblings. It's not like I have to see him much - and yes, he can be a bully, and I can't explain his treatment of his family. But he has done nice stuff for me in my life. Once, I was working in a kitchen when I was 16 in the school summer and this chemical they always used made my hands peel. He told me to quit the job and gave me some money to make up for the lost wage as he didn't want my hands to suffer. Another time, I needed extra tuition in French to get into college, and he arranged for that with a French professor he knew, and another time he gave me a rabbit which my parents wouldn't let me have, so it lived at his house. He has been nice to me in the past. It's a pity he has to behave this way now.

It is nice you are trying to find the good in him! Could you say something like "I am sure you did not mean to be insulting, but I have taken offense to some things you have said. I do not feel that I have any problems either present or past that need discussing now. I also do not feel that my weight should be brought up again. I am looking forward to spending the holiday with you, but I REFUSE to ruin my Christmas by having the same conversation. As I am sure you would not want to insult or offend the person hosting you this year, I look forward to seeing you."
 

Andelain

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 10, 2010
Messages
3,525
Jambalaya|1447286284|3948452 said:
He behaves himself for the most part; it's the Speech of Doom that bothers me. It's the sheer stupidity of it that annoys me so much.

"Excuse me, I have to go clean the cat box". Then walk away from him in mid-sentence.
 

rainydaze

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
May 1, 2007
Messages
3,250
Andelain|1447392290|3949120 said:
Jambalaya|1447286284|3948452 said:
He behaves himself for the most part; it's the Speech of Doom that bothers me. It's the sheer stupidity of it that annoys me so much.

"Excuse me, I have to go clean the cat box". Then walk away from him in mid-sentence.

Then ask him to open his mouth wide so you can get to it! :lol:
 

AprilBaby

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 17, 2008
Messages
12,566
I'm so sorry you are facing all this. All I can say is as I get older I don't give a s*** about what other people think of me or my weight. All I answer to is myself. Hard to do I'm sure but try it.
 

smitcompton

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 11, 2006
Messages
2,989
Hi,

I didn't read all the posts before I posted. Twenty three yrs ago is a long time for this man to be talking about this issue. You knew him as a child and your responses seem to be stuck as well as his comments are stuck. VRs suggestions are really good. Address this
when he comes in a firm way. Don't practice ageism yourself. He is still responsible for what he says. Bring him in the present, it will be good for him. Maybe it won't make a difference, but at least you tried. Its good practice for you.

Annette
 

marymm

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 21, 2010
Messages
5,079
I've had one or two elderly relatives in my life that also had "canned" stories/speeches similar to the "Speech of Doom" - it wasn't until after I had extensive experience with taking care of my father who had Alzheimer's that I was able to get a good fix on how to respond to these kinds of monologues (regardless of the speaker's age and mental state)... "I'll think on what you've said - thank you for caring about me."

As you know yourself, you can't always teach an old dog new tricks, but that doesn't mean you stop spending time with the dog - it just means you have to find it in yourself to assign an acceptable meaning to what the old dog is still able to do.

In your case, you love your uncle and he is someone who was there for you at several critical times when you were younger. If he mis-remembers/mis-states the facts of your personal chronology, does it really matter at this point? I know it does, because he hurts your feelings when he says these things... but what if instead of focusing on the actual words coming out of his mouth, you concentrate on the fact that it is just too sad that he no longer has the ability/interest in getting the facts right? And, that he has spent time thinking about you and "your problems" and has come up with theories/suggestions (however out of whack) presumably to help you improve your lot in life?
 

tyty333

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Dec 17, 2008
Messages
25,288
Jam, you've gotten some really good advice. I'd just like to add... do your best to NOT bring up any "triggers" that
gets him started on his speech o' doom. Your weight seems to be one of them...dont bring anything related to your
weight/depression/sadness up. Then I agree with the others, leave the room in mid-sentence..."Oh, I forgot to put
something out for dinner" , "Is that my phone?", "Oh, you know what I forgot to do...", leaves room before you have to
say what you forgot to do.

I have personally used these type of maneuvers in the past and they worked for me. Hoping they work for you too!
 

PintoBean

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 27, 2011
Messages
6,584
Is there someone you can sit across from or sit next to who feels the same about the speech? Someone that you can share smiles and winks with, thumb wrestle under the table with while its going on?

I don't know what uncle is like but I'm the type of person where when im up on my soapbox, I will follow you into the kitchen carrying that soap box lolololol.
 

Andelain

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 10, 2010
Messages
3,525
rainydaze|1447425697|3949238 said:
Andelain|1447392290|3949120 said:
"Excuse me, I have to go clean the cat box". Then walk away from him in mid-sentence.

Then ask him to open his mouth wide so you can get to it! :lol:

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
 

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
4,651
Such great advice, everyone. Thank you so much. You've given me a lot to think about. :read:
 
Be a part of the community Get 3 HCA Results
    Natural Diamond Prices - August 2022
    Natural Diamond Prices - August 2022 - 08/16
    Our Favorite Celebrity Engagement Rings Of 2022
    Our Favorite Celebrity Engagement Rings Of 2022 - 08/12
    Gifting Ideas: Pandora Bracelets
    Gifting Ideas: Pandora Bracelets - 08/10
Top