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Engagement Ring not perfectly circular?

Discussion in 'RockyTalky' started by Jen Wallace, Aug 7, 2019.

  1. yssie
    Super_Ideal_Rock

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    by yssie » Aug 8, 2019
    Ditto @the_mother_thing, @Karl_K, @distracts
    I hate to say it, but $1200 is a very low budget for a setting with pave.
    I agree with other posters - the mount was likely ordered in a "standard size 7" (it would not have had the diamonds in it at time of order, just the holes) to get costs down as much as possible.
    The unfortunate reality is that most women would be fine with the ring as-is... And I would expect that having this done properly would cost quite a bit more.
    That said, the off-center arch is a travesty and he should fix that (at no charge).
     
    Sunstorm, Acinom, JrJ and 3 others like this.
  2. bludiva
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by bludiva » Aug 8, 2019
    agreed, a setting like that will typically go for 2x or more over what your fiance paid, OP. sounds like he was really trying. i hope you can get the issues ironed out to the point that you are happy with the ring.
     
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  3. Shinybaubles
    Rough_Rock

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    by Shinybaubles » Aug 9, 2019
    The off round would not bother me at all, but the hump is odd. That said, if it doesn't show and is not uncomfortable, it wouldn’t bug me.

    I agree that it sounds like your fiancé did the best he could. He sought your parent’s advice re a jeweler, picked a ring you think is beautiful, and did it all within a reasonable budget that does not require him to take on a sizable debt. He sounds like a keeper! Whether the ring is a keeper is up to you!
     
  4. Jen Wallace
    Rough_Rock

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    by Jen Wallace » Aug 12, 2019
    I understand my fiance's budget was not very high and I am in no way blaming him for that...at all. The mount was ordered exactly as you describe (I even said that), with the holes in the ring for him to place the diamonds later on. The ONLY thing that bugs me is how much does it really cost to order a size 5? Again, I am not in this trade so don't know much about this but I have to believe that if the cost difference was say like $500-800 to order the blank setting in my size, my fiance would have paid that difference if he knew the ring wouldnt be round.

    The budget is not the issue here, it's just that he failed to communicate ANY of this to my fiance. And to people saying that we should have asked, we asked the questions WE as consumers know to ask. But to someone else's point on here, there is literally NO way my fiance would ever think he would be getting a non round ring. At the end of the day, it is an investment. This was not a ring either of us wanted to replace the setting on in a matter of like 4 years if one of the diamonds falls out or something. I'm just saying clarity and being clear/transparent on what was being done to the ring would have alleviated all of this. I would have even chipped in money myself had I known it wouldn't come out round! And my fiance wouldn't have been bothered by that at all. He has pride but he also is smart enough to know a ring is meant to be a piece you don't just keep fiddling with until it is right.

    I do appreciate everyone's insights, POV, etc. Thank you!
     
    Daisys and Diamonds likes this.
    


    


  5. anon34985
    Shiny_Rock

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    by anon34985 » Aug 12, 2019
    Can you take a photo with the diamond pointing directly north? In all of your photos the ring is placed slightly facing North West, its hard to understand what you mean when you say "not round" the only glaring problem i see with this is the hump. Maybe you could get that taken out and see how it fits, my finger is a size 5 but my ring is a 5.25, and while it does spin sometimes, most of the summer it fits well. But i do think a photo with the diamond facing directly north could help to see how off center it is!
     
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  6. Jen Wallace
    Rough_Rock

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    by Jen Wallace » Aug 13, 2019
    sure, here are better photos, tried to get it as straight as possible. IMG_5966.jpg IMG_5968.jpg
     
  7. yssie
    Super_Ideal_Rock

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    by yssie » Aug 13, 2019
    You aren’t being unreasonable! Here on PS we can all sympathize with being unhappy with an engagement ring - it’s not “just a ring”.

    I think the reason your jeweller didn’t communicate this side effect to you is that most women really would be perfectly okay with the ring as-is - for most women, if they noticed at all, it would be just a(nother) small compromise for budget. You’re not okay with it. Because you’re not most women in this regard. That’s 100% understandable.

    The thing is, this jeweller is a person too, and all people want to make other people - especially their valued customers - feel good about their choices. When someone comes in with a too-small-for-what-they-want budget, a jeweller who finds a way (ie. finds corners to cut) to make that budget work most likely isn’t going to spout off the litany of possible side effects. That wouldn’t make the customer feel good, it would just highlight the fact that he doesn’t have the budget to do this without all the disclaimers. The budget isn’t your blocker, turns out, but the jeweller didn’t know that - it’s what drove his decision-making.

    Should your jeweller have sat you down and explained exactly what he was going to do and what potential outcomes of all those decisions would be, discomfort aside? In my opinion yes. Because he should have sat down with you and made an effort to understand how particular you are. The list of side effects would be very long, and very confusing to new buyers, and very scary, and the reality is that if he made it a blanket habit he’d lose a ton of business to other vendors because to uneducated ears “confusing” and “scary” reads as “incompetent”.


    Okay. What can you do about it now?
    1. You need to talk to your jeweller. You aren’t happy, and you’re more particular about what will make you happy than your FI. Tell him exactly what you aren’t happy with and ask him what can be done (and at what cost). Let’s find out what the options are!
    2. Put the ring away for a few days and give yourself a short break from all of this. Maybe go out and choose your wedding bands? ::)
     
    Last edited: Aug 13, 2019
  8. motownmama
    Ideal_Rock

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    by motownmama » Aug 13, 2019
    I too think you need to address this with the jeweler. Things that bug you NOW, when you're basking in its newness, , will bug you MORE in the future.
     
  9. Pimberly
    Rough_Rock

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    by Pimberly » Aug 13, 2019
    I think I must need my eyes checked because the ring looks pretty round to me :shifty:. That sizer thing would drive me crazy though!
     
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  10. distracts
    Ideal_Rock

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    by distracts » Aug 13, 2019
    I can't tell that it's not round either... but the sizing bar needs help.
     
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  11. Daisys and Diamonds
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by Daisys and Diamonds » Aug 13, 2019
    5K is still an awful lot of money when you think about what 5K can buy in general
    Could maybe you mum or aunty take it in to the jewler if he's the family jewler and be
    nice and polite but express disappointment ?
     
  12. Lovesparklesparle
    Shiny_Rock

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    by Lovesparklesparle » Aug 13, 2019
    If you’re not happy with the sizing bar get that fixed, but asking the jeweller to make your ring to a sub retail budget then expecting retail results is unreasonable. It seems like the jeweller really tried to meet your requirements but it wasn’t possible to meet your expectations. I’m no fan of salesman believe me, but it’s also possible the issues were explained to your SO but not understood. Ring buying is a highly stressful and emotional experience and often rational, logical thinking goes out the window and you don’t think or hear clearly in the heat of the moment.

    I’m sorry you are so upset, I get it, but try to calm yourself. Fixating on what you hate or think is wrong with your ring will continue to perpetuate these feelings- you have a beautiful ring and fiancé. You will ding your ring up eventually anyway and not notice the slight out of round on your hand.
     
  13. new-beginning
    Shiny_Rock

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    by new-beginning » Aug 13, 2019
    did we ever determine why the 'jeweler' didn't order the ring in her size?
     
  14. cmd2014
    Ideal_Rock

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    by cmd2014 » Aug 13, 2019
    Many stock settings only come in one size and then need to be sized to fit. 6 - 7 is the norm.
     
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