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Wedding DW dress help!! Feeling very un-bridey...

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AlliMay

AlliMay

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 19, 2008
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Thought that maybe some of you lovely ladies can help!! I have seen the wonders that you dress gurus have done for others, so I''m hopeful you can help me

I am totally feeling like the anti-bride, as I cannot seem to find any dresses that are even in the running.

FI and I are having a DW in Mexico (Riviera Maya) 7/14/09. I am looking for a somewhat casual, strapless dress to wear (ivory or white). Here''s my stipulations:

-No beading, sequins, etc. Love it on other people, but on me it feels costumey...
-No full skirt. Even most A-lines feel too full for me.
-Lightweight breathable fabric. No taffeta, satin, etc. if possible. Not a huge fan of chiffon...Would love lightweight silk or even cotton (???) Mexico in July people!
-I''m cheap (cannot justify spending a huge amount for a one-day dress). <$500 if possible...

Seriously...am I out of my mind? Does a dress like this even exist?? Be honest, please, I can take it!

I have tried on dresses at 3 different very nice boutiques and have no contenders. Even tried on some birdesmaid dresses, but none were available in a fabric that felt light enough to me.

I am starting to feel like there is something wrong with me as everyone else that I know found something right away! It is to the point where I do not even want to go look anywhere because it just makes me feel like a bad bride, and the salespeople get exasperated with me.

Help??!!
 
Absolutely, you can find what you''re looking for, and you aren''t being unreasonable or wrong or a bad bride. (I get that feeling sometimes too. What does that even mean??)

It might be a little hard at this time of year, and you may find you have more luck in the spring, looking in department stores. But in the meantime, have a look at their websites, and also at Bluefly.com. You might find something like this:


http://www.bluefly.com/Parameter-white-pleated-strapless-sweetheart-dress/cat60019/211833300/detail.fly

Or this:


http://www.bluefly.com/Vera-Wang-white-pleated-cotton-strapless-dress/cat60019/300813501/detail.fly

Alternately, since you have a fair amount of time and you know exactly what you want, it might be worth going to a seamstress to have one made for you - then you could get incredible fabric that would be ridiculously expensive through a bridal shop, and get exactly the fit you want.
 
What do you think of this one? Priscilla of Boston has some beautiful bridesmaid dresses that can subsitute for a wedding dress.

Look here.
 
Thanks so much pjean! Glad I am not the only one who feels like a "bad bride"... I have no idea what that means, tho!

I
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the Vera Wang you posted! However I am not sure that I want short or tea length. I never wear long dresses, so I was kind of thinking that this is my one shot to wear one.

I love the idea of buying an off-the-rack dress, and completely forgot about bluefly! I am hesitant to have a dress made for the sole reason that FI and I now live in the middle of Iowa - many tailors, but not necessarily any dress-makers. Also, I am worried that I would hat the dress...

Anyone have any experience having a dress made??
 
Date: 11/24/2008 11:20:41 AM
Author: CDNinNYC
What do you think of this one? Priscilla of Boston has some beautiful bridesmaid dresses that can subsitute for a wedding dress.

Look here.
Click to expand...
OMG! Thanks so much CDNinNYC!!

I love several of those dresses--including the eyelet! The closest POB retailer would be 3-4 hours away, though, but as long as I could have the alterations done locally that would be OK.

Ok...I am starting to feel like there might be hope for me after all
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Here are some more cotton options for you. These (or some of these) dresses can be ordered in cotton eyelet:

http://www.ariadress.com/DressThumbnails.htm

Also, lots of pretty dresses here with different fabric options:

http://bridal.threaddesign.com/collections/pages/i597_16.php


I did look into having a dress made for me, but did not pursue. One shop told me it would be very expensive (over 1k) and another shop told me that I would be better off getting a dress that I liked and then having modifcations made to it.
 
Dresses by Eden are well within your price range, but the material may be a problem.

You might like Dessy better; a lot of them are silk.

I almost bought from Eden myself. BTW, I highly recommend bestbridalprices.com
 
Date: 11/24/2008 11:40:25 AM
Author: AlliMay
Date: 11/24/2008 11:20:41 AM

Ok...I am starting to feel like there might be hope for me after all
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Click to expand...

There''s totally hope. Not only are you going to find something great, it looks as though you''ll be spoiled for choice! That first POB dress is hot.
Click to expand...
 
You ladies rock! Seriously.

pjean, CDNinNYC, Loves Vintage, Ebree, choro72...THANK YOU!

You have ALL given me some great options (BTW, pjean-that last BCBG dress that you posted is fab! Off the rack, woo-hoo!).

More importantly, you all have made me feel like I may not be missing the "bride gene" (to quote SATC) after all...I have been absolutely struggling with the whole dress issue and beginning to really think that there was something wrong with me. Now I have hope! I cannot thank you enough!
 
You''re totally welcome. I''d way rather find dresses for you than work on my thesis.
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Date: 11/24/2008 2:52:08 PM
Author: AlliMay
(BTW, pjean-that last BCBG dress that you posted is fab! Off the rack, woo-hoo!).
Click to expand...

Right?? I want you to get it so I can live vicariously. Plus: it''s silk! The only problem is that I bet it would be a pain to hem, so you''d have to find a good seamstress. Still...
 
I love that BCBG dress, too! Its amazing!
 
Date: 11/24/2008 3:41:52 PM
Author: pjean
You''re totally welcome. I''d way rather find dresses for you than work on my thesis.
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Date: 11/24/2008 2:52:08 PM
Author: AlliMay
(BTW, pjean-that last BCBG dress that you posted is fab! Off the rack, woo-hoo!).
Click to expand...

Right?? I want you to get it so I can live vicariously. Plus: it''s silk! The only problem is that I bet it would be a pain to hem, so you''d have to find a good seamstress. Still...
Click to expand...
I was going to post that I was in BCBG this afternoon and they had a number of really pretty long white dresses available. The one pjean provided a link for was my favourite! It looks beautiful in person.
 
AlliMay,

I totally feel your pain. I was just married this past June in Cancun! I had similar parameters as you when looking for a dress. I ended up with a taffeta dress, and I was warm, but I wasn''t uncomfortable at all! This was my dress...

I just saw thisdress in the J Crew catalog and fell in love with it!
 
CDNinNYC---thanks! Good to hear from someone who has seen the dress in person...I am really thinking hard about that one
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indypitty---You and your dress are gorgeous!! I love that it is clean and simple, but still very stylish and unique. That is SO what I am going for! I saw that new J.Crew the other day, too! So pretty...not sure I can pull off that collar though...
 
I don''t know if you''ve shopped at BCBG before but as an FYI, they don''t allow returns if you buy from the store. Exchanges only. If you order online, though, you are able to get a complete refund if you''re not happy with the dress. All you''d be responsible for is the shipping and return costs.

Of course, if you buy a BCBG dress from a department store (Macy''s Nordstroms, Bloomindales, Saks) the BCBG return policy doesn''t apply.
 
I'm not doing a destination wedding, but my dress specifications are almost identical to yours! So far I have purchased the Sophia dress from JCrew and I really like it. I'll continue to look around, but if I don't find anything else I like more then that will be it. I do with their dresses came in white and ivory so I could compare ... but I'm ok with the ivory and it probably compliments my skin better anyway. The dress is simple and well made except that the zipper, which is on the side, is a bit wavy. I need to take it to my tailor/dry cleaner and make sure they can press that out, but I don't think it will be a problem.

I recently ordered the Rebecca, so we'll see how it looks. It worries me that I can't seem to find it on the site anymore (I clicked through the link that EBree posted when I ordered, but I have seen it on their site before). I hope they don't come back to me in a day or two and say it's not available (they've done that to me in the past).

I think this is a great thread and I'm really excited to hear everyone's tips (hopefully I can make use of some of them!). It's also nice to know that there are other non-bridey brides out there who are looking for the same things as I am. Good luck on your search!
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ETA: I love JCrew's silk tricotine (sp?) fabric. I'm trying to stay away from taffeta (as FI said, it sounds like ski pants, lol) and their silk looks formal without being swishy.
 
Date: 11/25/2008 9:55:39 AM
Author: CDNinNYC
I don''t know if you''ve shopped at BCBG before but as an FYI, they don''t allow returns if you buy from the store. Exchanges only. If you order online, though, you are able to get a complete refund if you''re not happy with the dress. All you''d be responsible for is the shipping and return costs.

Of course, if you buy a BCBG dress from a department store (Macy''s Nordstroms, Bloomindales, Saks) the BCBG return policy doesn''t apply.
Click to expand...
Thanks for the info., CDNinNYC! I have never bought at an actual BCBG store, only through other vendors (Nordstrom''s, etc.), but that is good to know that they won''t return in-store. Although I am sure I wouldn''t have a huge problem finding something to exchange for!
 
Elrohwen! Non-bridey brides unite
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I am so glad to hear that I am not alone!!

I always assumed that I would be a J.Crew bride, but none of the dresses they have right now really call to me. The one that I originally loved was their Caroline (modeled after Caroline Bisset-Kennedy''s wedding dress, but a halter), but then I realized that nearly every dress I own is a halter and I wanted something special and different for my wedding. Which is why I am leaning toward strapless...however, I may end up a J.Crew bride after all as I love their dresses.

Have you posted a pick of yourself in the Sophia??

I would also be curious to see how the Rebecca looks on a "real" person, so please post when you get that one in!
 
Another unbridey DW bride here. I suggest you go to the forums at Indie Bride and search. There are several pics of real women in all of the J. Crew dresses. I just don''t feel it is right to post pictures of real people on here without their permission, so sorry not to link to them. I would sell an organ for the Celeste, but I think they are almost impossible to come by now since they haven''t made them in over 3 years.

I also LOVED the Thread Maeve in white on white seersucker when I tried it on. It was very casual, but that also means it is crazy rewearable, which is a huge plus. And, it comes in knee length, too. I also posted the Jenny Yoo Audrey here the other day, but it was also mega cute.
 
Date: 11/25/2008 5:01:59 PM
Author: AlliMay
Elrohwen! Non-bridey brides unite
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I am so glad to hear that I am not alone!!

I always assumed that I would be a J.Crew bride, but none of the dresses they have right now really call to me. The one that I originally loved was their Caroline (modeled after Caroline Bisset-Kennedy''s wedding dress, but a halter), but then I realized that nearly every dress I own is a halter and I wanted something special and different for my wedding. Which is why I am leaning toward strapless...however, I may end up a J.Crew bride after all as I love their dresses.

Have you posted a pick of yourself in the Sophia??

I would also be curious to see how the Rebecca looks on a ''real'' person, so please post when you get that one in!
Click to expand...
I actually haven''t posted any pics yet because I don''t have any
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My family will be in town this weekend and I''ll be trying on a few dresses for them, so I''ll see if I can get some pics with the Sophia while we''re at it and post some for once! I agree that it''s hard to tell what they look like in person when they''re always shown on models.

I know what you mean about wanting something special and different. Sometimes I wonder about the Sophia because it''s so simple and plain ... and while that''s what I want, one of my friends (also a bride) pointed out that maybe this is a time to go for something different and not just a dress you would wear every day (beause I would so wear the Sophia as an every day dress in a knee length cut).
 
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