Do you think he'll put it off?

[PrincessNatalie]

General update/thought/not really sure what you would call it.

It was my very best friends wedding on Sunday and that was beautiful, heaps of fun and went off perfectly.

We have a core close knit group of 8 best friends (3 couples and two single friends), this weekend was the first wedding within our group.

Both the other couple and us have been in long term/serious relationships except ours is just over 2 years and theirs is 11. She has spoken to us on a number of occasions this year mentioning she is itching for him to ask but doesnt think it will happen. Mainly because he popped the question a couple of years ago and she said "please dont ask me that yet", but she is now ready, so my bestie cornered him at her wedding and asked about an ETA. He said yes, its coming in early 2011, which is really close and now I am super excited for them both! Of course we dont think she knows and so wont be mentioning it to her.

But my bestie told me in front of my SO, and I could see a couple of clouds pass over his face... early 2011 is when I was hoping and I have a feeling he was planning for us to become engaged.

And now (and this may be unfounded because its not like we can't get engaged just because they are doing it too) I am worried that my SO might be polite and let them "go first", since they have been together much longer, since school actually, and so I would understand him putting ours off a couple of months to give them their special time. I am secretly sure SO has the ring and is just waiting for the right time. I would understand putting it off to give them their time. But I was quite happy to have my expected timeline.

*sigh* I need some kick up the butt/cheer up/look on the bright side/wake up call posts from you girls, I'm getting a little bit of LIW-itis.

 

[amc80]

I would be happy that I had a future fiance/husband who was so thoughtful. Whether he actually waits or not, your engagement will happen when it's right. Obsessing and worrying isn't going to make it happen any sooner. Relax, have fun, and enjoy your time together as boyfriend and girlfriend, especially if you know you will be engaged in the next 3-6 months.

 

[PrincessNatalie]

Yes I totally agree, I also actually do think its the right thing to do too, which is why I think he may put it off, but I guess I should have added the main reason I was happy with my timeline is SO and I are going over to SE Asia for New Years and Christmas and I was really hoping it would happen then, it would be amazing and perfect, and I am pretty sure he thinks that would be the best time.

If it doesnt oh well, but I guess we will have to wait for our next excursion overseas, which will be july/aug mid next year more than likely. It might even be further off. He could do it at home, but to me thats boring and not our style. I dont want to get engaged and then go back to work the next day, I have been looking forward to being able to enjoy it for a couple of weeks together, so thats all that gets me. We go overseas whenever we take time off work so if he does do it at home it will just be on a weekend or mid week evening, bleh. lol.

Oh well I do know your right.

 

[amc80]

After reading that, I think he'll still do it on your trip. Especially if the time is perfect, except for your friends' engagement. While it is very polite to delay it for your friends, your engagement is about the two of you. You know your BF better than we do. Which do you think he will do? And I mean which do you REALLY think?

 

[PrincessNatalie]

Honestly he would probably think it would be silly to not do it just because they might get engaged and what if they dont? How long shall we put it off.

He might also be worried about me prefering him to leave it until they have their moment in the sun, coz he knows me and because honestly if we weren't going overseas at the end of the year I actually do feel that we should let them have their time first (sounds stupid I know but they are awesome and I love them and want them to be happy. I wouldnt want her to feel hurt because everyone has lapped them, but unfortunately in this case I do still hope for it to happen while we are overseas). But I saw the clouds on his face and feel maybe that is what he was thinking of too. I guess I will just have to wait and see. It throws a bit of doubt in to add to the suspense I guess . There is a tonne of romantic stuff we are doing while we are away so even if he decides not to we will still have a wonderful time.

The trip is getting pretty close now too so I dont want to mention anything to BF about any of it because I dont want to jinx it lol. Which makes the guesswork even more covert, coz a couple of months ago I probably would have mentioned something like I would like to be engaged at the same time as my friend so that we could do bridey stuff together, to find out his thoughts on the matter.

 

[FuturePsyD]

The trip is what makes me feel that he won't put it off. IMO the clouds you saw pass over his face probably had to do with the "disappointment" of his proposal overlapping with that of your friends. But if I had to take a guess, I would say that he is going to take advantage of your romantic, overseas vacation to do what's right for you guys as a couple.

Of course you want to be considerate and polite to your friends, but if he had a proposal planned, with the ring purchased, the trip set, I feel everyone would understand why he went ahead and proposed as planned. Do any of your friends know that your BF has the ring already and about your timeline that's just around the corner??