Do you object to this Time magazine cover?

[kenny]

Time ran a cover of a woman breast feeding her 3 year old son.

Here's an article about it: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/cutline/time-breastfeeding-cover-sparks-immediate-controversy-151539970.html

Please explain why you do or do not object.

 

[armywife13]

I don't object to public breast feeding, so I suppose I don't object to the cover...

That being said, I don't necessaryly agree with extended breast feeding. I understand everyone had their own opinions on extended breast feeding and I respect people's opinions and choices on the matter, but the sight of it is a little shocking and it isn't a choice I would make.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

I object because her boobs still look perky after 3 years of breastfeeding. Is there a jealous emoticon?

 

[kenny]

The reason I do not object to the cover is breast feeding is natural and better for the child than formula.
If ongoing research indicates benefits of continuing longer, this it is important medical info to get out.
It is a public service, public health issue.
The best way to get info out it to grab people's eyes.

This cover does that.
(Yes, obviously Time would like to make more money selling more magazines so there is also a profit motive. But hey, that's capitalism.)

I also do not think breast feeding is dirty, shameful, embarrassing, sexually stimulating - but I'm a gay man who is an Apatheist.
Maybe religious straight men feel differently.

 

[armywife13]

I object because her boobs still look perky after 3 years of breastfeeding. Is there a jealous emoticon?

+1

I am totally jealous, I don't think my boobs were EVER that perky.

 

[iLander]

I think it's pretty sensationalistic (is that a word?), and a step down from the Time I read as a kid.

I don't know about her, but I stopped breastfeeding when TEETH started to be an issue.

 

[mrs taylor]

I breastfed for longer than the "norm" and I take issue. Really? Are you MOM enough? That's a seriously inflammatory title and the last thing mom's need is the media fanning flames and pitting us against each other even more. We play the guilt/judgement game more than anyone IMO and we don't need any more reasons to feel insecure or inferior.

 

[makemepretty]

I do object to it, the breast should be covered if you are feeding your child IMHO. There are lots of natural things the body does, I don't particularly want to witness it.

 

[amc80]

I find it disturbing. 1) I'm fairly modest. I totally support breastfeeding and plan on doing it, but I'll cover up. I don't need random people seeing my boobs any more than I want to see some other person's boobs. 2) If the kid is old enough to ask for it by name, he's too old to be doing it.

Just my opinion, of course.

 

[mrs taylor]

I find it disturbing. 1) I'm fairly modest. I totally support breastfeeding and plan on doing it, but I'll cover up. I don't need random people seeing my boobs any more than I want to see some other person's boobs. 2) If the kid is old enough to ask for it by name, he's too old to be doing it.

Just my opinion, of course.

I know it's your opinion, and I'm not at all picking on you, but since we're on topic, the World Health Organization does not agree. Their official recommendation is two years and beyond-their words. By then they can most certainly ask for it.

http://www.who.int/topics/breastfeeding/en/

Most people don't understand what it means to nurse a 3 year old. It really isn't something you'd ever NEED to see in public IMO/E. At that age they may nurse a couple to a few times a day and they can most certainly understand NO or NOT RIGHT NOW.

And I'll eat my hat if that kid is actually 3. If he is, it's for another couple of days.

 

[kenny]

OMG, here's a 8-yr old.
People sure do vary.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxv6R9fUO74

 

[mrs taylor]

yeahhhhhhhhhhhh. no thanks. I know there are cultures that will nurse until kids lose their "milk teeth." Glad I'm not part of them!

 

[Laila619]

Nope, not at all. Extended nursing has proven benefits for toddlers. And nursing is a beautiful thing!

It's sad that no one would think twice about seeing a toddler drinking cow's milk or formula, but heaven forbid he is nursing.

 

[Dreamer_D]

It does not bother me.

I am pretty sure the title is suppsoed to be ironic, and the actual article is about how modern ideas about extended BFing and co-sleeping et al. actually corral and limit women just as much as any other gender-role expectations do. In a sense they are anit-feminist. But maybe not, I have not read it, just heard a lot about the furor over the recent book that proposed those ideas.

 

[Laila619]

I find it disturbing. 1) I'm fairly modest. I totally support breastfeeding and plan on doing it, but I'll cover up. I don't need random people seeing my boobs any more than I want to see some other person's boobs. 2) If the kid is old enough to ask for it by name, he's too old to be doing it.

Just my opinion, of course.

My little guy started pointing and lifting my shirt up by himself at just 12 months old. I certainly didn't feel the need to stop then. In fact, the WHO encourages extended bfing, so we're still chugging along and he is thriving.

I do think that kid on the cover looks way older than three though.

 

[ksinger]

Hate to break it to you Kenny, but while demonstrably good for a period of time, the benefits of breastfeeding appear to be overstated by the popular press and the La Leche League by quite a lot. And there seems to be a growing backlash against what women in certain circles (mainly affluent) are starting to see as a very oppressive environment created by "total motherhood". It has the same fervor as a religion in some respects, and as such, instantaneously sends up red flags with ME. This also ties in heavily with the current environment of attempts to slam women back into the 19th century, so there is a bunch more here than we can possibly address. But still... you have probably opened a serious can of worms by starting this thread.

I've just about finished "The Conflict - How Modern Motherhood Undermines the Status of Women." Not the best feminist work I've ever read - too short and too repetitive - but it makes some good points about the current societal model of the "good mother" and how the trope of total sacrifice for a helpless infant has actually done a better job of guilting women back into "their place" than anything men have attempted. It also punches back hard at the idea of "maternal instinct" and addresses that thing which must not be named - maternal ambivalence and downright regret at having had children.

I'm sure many of the attachment mothers in here might come frothing into this fray, but I see the whole thing as being not unlike the Komen situation - starting with the best intentions, the move to breastfeeding started as a backlash against the male-dominated medical profession treating women like children. However, also like Komen becoming something quite other than it started, the "breast is best" mantra has itself morphed into an oppressive guilt-inducing force in the other direction. Big lack of balance.

In any case, Time Magazine is NOT my trusted source for "public service announcements".

This is an opinion piece by Hannah Roisin, mother of three, and Slate blogger (or that's where I read her most). Take only this link! The Atlantic Online is being particularly wonky today and locking ME up at least. This link is a "print" option, without all the ad tracking crap...

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/print/2009/04/the-case-against-breast-feeding/7311/

 

[mrs taylor]

I'm sure many of the attachment mothers in here might come frothing into this fray, but I see the whole thing as being not unlike the Komen situation - starting with the best intentions, the move to breastfeeding started as a backlash against the male-dominated medical profession treating women like children. However, also like Komen becoming something quite other than it started, the "breast is best" mantra has itself morphed into an oppressive guilt-inducing force in the other direction. Big lack of balance.

this one isn't and I couldn't agree more.

 

[tammy77]

I don't know if I object to it, but even though I BF'd my children for 18 months and 13 months, I do find it...uncomfortable. That might just stem from my modest nature. I don't want to see ANYONE'S breast sticking out. I'm totally fine if you want to NIP. I just don't find any reason to let it all hang out, kwim?

Regarding the WHO recommendations, correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe that it's partly because in many countries the availability for nutritional food is less than ideal, so BF'ing as long as possible is definitely advantageous.

 

[Autumnovember]

I voted that I don't object.

My reason is because public breastfeeding isn't something that bothers me AND although I don't really think I'd ever breastfeed a child thats 3 years old, I don't care if other people choose to.

What DOES bother me is the title.

I don't feel strongly about breastfeeding in general. When I was doing my L&D rotation at the hospital, we had a lot of women who chose not to breastfeed and I never once really thought "omg, she's choosing not to breastfeed?!?!!?!!"

 

[Pandora II]

My daughter turns 3 next week and I am still breastfeeding. I even feed her in public and have yet to have an adverse comment or even look - although one woman told DD that she was 'a very lucky girl'.

She started talking at 7 months and could definitely ask for milk before the age of 1 so the 'when they can ask for it' thing doesn't work for me.

Breastfeeding till 3 or 4 is very normal in many cultures.

My daughter uses it as a form of comfort, a way of rebonding with me and because she just likes it. Not only is it good for her - she is almost never ill (although when she is she wants to feed all the time which is a great way of ensuring she gets enough fluids when she has a fever) - but it's also very beneficial for me especially in lowering the risk of breast cancer.

I grew up in a culture where co-sleeping, baby wearing and extended breast-feeding were the norm - the western idea of enforcing mother/baby separation as early as possible was regarded as very odd by the women there.

So, the cover doesn't offend me - I'd be interested to read the article - but unlike the breast beenies, I think it's probably overly provacative and unhelpful to those of us who do extended feeding. Although I still feed in public, I am pretty discreet about it even on buses etc so I don't think you need to shove it in other people's faces.

 

[kenny]

Hate to break it to you Kenny, but while demonstrably good for a period of time, the benefits of breastfeeding appear to be overstated by the popular press and the La Leche League by quite a lot. And there seems to be a growing backlash against what women in certain circles (mainly affluent) are starting to see as a very oppressive environment created by "total motherhood". It has the same fervor as a religion in some respects, and as such, instantaneously sends up red flags with ME. This also ties in heavily with the current environment of attempts to slam women back into the 19th century, so there is a bunch more here than we can possibly address. But still... you have probably opened a serious can of worms by starting this thread.

I've just about finished "The Conflict - How Modern Motherhood Undermines the Status of Women." Not the best feminist work I've ever read - too short and too repetitive - but it makes some good points about the current societal model of the "good mother" and how the trope of total sacrifice for a helpless infant has actually done a better job of guilting women back into "their place" than anything men have attempted. It also punches back hard at the idea of "maternal instinct" and addresses that thing which must not be named - maternal ambivalence and downright regret at having had children.

I'm sure many of the attachment mothers in here might come frothing into this fray, but I see the whole thing as being not unlike the Komen situation - starting with the best intentions, the move to breastfeeding started as a backlash against the male-dominated medical profession treating women like children. However, also like Komen becoming something quite other than it started, the "breast is best" mantra has itself morphed into an oppressive guilt-inducing force in the other direction. Big lack of balance.

In any case, Time Magazine is NOT my trusted source for "public service announcements".

This is an opinion piece by Hannah Roisin, mother of three, and Slate blogger (or that's where I read her most). Take only this link! The Atlantic Online is being particularly wonky today and locking ME up at least. This link is a "print" option, without all the ad tracking crap...

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/print/2009/04/the-case-against-breast-feeding/7311/

Ksinger, thank you for 'breaking it to me', though I'm not sure why you would "hate" doing so.

I welcome everyone's perspective, not just those from people similar to me.
After all, people vary and a variety of perspetives makes for a more educational thread.

 

[mrs jam]

I'm not a mom, but shouldn't that kid be on solid food by now? I think I would feel really disturbed if I knew my mother had breast fed me at age 3.

 

[mrs taylor]

Most kids are on solids by a year.

breastmilk is more than simply macronutrients. new components are being discovered all the time. The immunologic factors continue to influence the system beyond the time "real food" is introduced.

 

[amc80]

I find it disturbing. 1) I'm fairly modest. I totally support breastfeeding and plan on doing it, but I'll cover up. I don't need random people seeing my boobs any more than I want to see some other person's boobs. 2) If the kid is old enough to ask for it by name, he's too old to be doing it.

Just my opinion, of course.

My little guy started pointing and lifting my shirt up by himself at just 12 months old. I certainly didn't feel the need to stop then. In fact, the WHO encourages extended bfing, so we're still chugging along and he is thriving.

I do think that kid on the cover looks way older than three though.

I'm not talking about an infant who can point and say a word. I'm talking about a child who can ask for it in a full sentence. If the kid can say "Hey, mom, I'm hungry, lift your shirt" then I personally think he's too old.

I also agree that the kid on the cover looks way older than 3.

 

[mrs taylor]

By two all of my kids were speaking in full sentences. And had been for some time. They aren't super advanced, either.

Like others have posted, the whole "by the time they can ask for it" doesn't hold weight for me.

 

[qtiekiki]

I object because her boobs still look perky after 3 years of breastfeeding. Is there a jealous emoticon?

They don't get droopy until you stop breasfeeding, well that's what happened to me.

 

[qtiekiki]

I'm not a mom, but shouldn't that kid be on solid food by now? I think I would feel really disturbed if I knew my mother had breast fed me at age 3.

By this time, the nutrients in breastmilk isn't sufficient, but as Mrs Taylor pointed out, there can be immunological benefits. From what I understand, extended breastfeeding has more to do with attached parenting and comfort than nutrients. Correct me if I am wrong.

 

[Fly Girl]

There are two people involved in breastfeeding and they need to agree to continue it, or it doesn't work. I was planning to breastfeed both of my children for a lot longer than we did, but both of them wanted to wean before their first birthday. I suppose I could have tried harder to impose my will on them, but I respected their decision, young as they were.

As for TIME magazine, I long ago quit living my life according to the tips in there.

 

[Skippy123]

here is another article on this and says a lot about the cover imo. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/10/jamie-lynne-grumet-breastfeeding-time-magazine-cover_n_1506096.html

 

[Haven]

I don't object to the picture. Why? It's difficult to explain why something DOESN'T bother me, it just doesn't. Although I imagine that one day, this picture is going to come back to haunt the little boy. Imagine if his teenage friends get ahold of it?

The question "Are you mom enough?" bothers me because it implies a whole lot of things about what it means to be enough mom, or a mom at all, and that bothers me. I don't like the phrase "man up" either, because I think it makes unfair insinuations about what it means to be a man, and how men should behave.