Do you listen to naysayers about your bling aspirations?

[House Cat]

I never asked anyone’s opinion before I upgraded but I sure got them afterward. Sigh. I will state that my husband loved the idea. He wanted a boat...we go tit for tat, so I got my upgrade, he got his boat and unlimited ocean fishing. We’re both happy. Now I have a freezer full of fish and a beautiful ring.

I recently had a friend ask me if I “still” liked my ring only a few months after I had it. This felt so snide to me. It hurt my feelings, considering it came from someone that I felt would never judge me.

 

[lambskin]

House Cat, what a horrible thing to ask to you. That 'friend' is no friend. How did you respond?

 

[House Cat]

House Cat, what a horrible thing to ask to you. That 'friend' is no friend. How did you respond?

I was in such shock by the whole thing that I froze. I said nothing witty. I just answered that I loved it and changed the subject.

 

[Weeivy73]

Lots to think about here.

I never thought about misogyny in judging jewelry purchases more harshly than other extras, but it sounds true.

Something else commonly overlooked is that good jewelry retains some value, unlike many other ways people spend their disposable incomes (vacations, spa treatments dining out, smaller but more frequent shopping splurges, etc.). For ex., I bought a decent quality 1.5 carat diamond ring a decade ago for $5,500 and I think I could get more for it now. It's not an investment but it does have some financial worth, on top of the enjoyment of wearing it every day.

Also, the snide comments mentioned all screamed "JEALOUS" to me. It would be different if someone's family was going without while they enjoyed luxuries themselves, but that hasn't been the case here. So if someone is that competitive with you that they just can't be polite when you have good fortune, then: (1) Ha ha, you won! And, (2) It shows you who's got your back and who doesn't, so I wouldn't forget it.

I'm especially thinking about this because I have a big purchase on the way. I'm older and my big responsibilities are done so usually no one says the judgy things they might say to younger women. I am also more guarded about who I share my business with than I used to be, because there are always those who might feel the need to "bring you down a peg," and it's no fun to share only to feel like you got your face slapped for it.

When visiting friends who are struggling to make ends meet, I'll probably just leave my big new pretty at home.

This is a wonderfully thoughtful comment and nails everything I've been contemplating lately. Thank you seaurchin, I'll look forward to seeing what you have coming up!

 

[Weeivy73]

I never asked anyone’s opinion before I upgraded but I sure got them afterward. Sigh. I will state that my husband loved the idea. He wanted a boat...we go tit for tat, so I got my upgrade, he got his boat and unlimited ocean fishing. We’re both happy. Now I have a freezer full of fish and a beautiful ring.

I recently had a friend ask me if I “still” liked my ring only a few months after I had it. This felt so snide to me. It hurt my feelings, considering it came from someone that I felt would never judge me.

House Cat this is what happens to me, and I agree it does feel a bit snide and underhanded. I experience this if I'm with a group of friends say for someone's birthday etc, I will get called out for wearing real bling while they sit there in their plated, plastic baubles that they have to keep re buying cos they don't last! Lol

 

[missy]

I was in such shock by the whole thing that I froze. I said nothing witty. I just answered that I loved it and changed the subject.

House Cat this is what happens to me, and I agree it does feel a bit snide and underhanded. I experience this if I'm with a group of friends say for someone's birthday etc, I will get called out for wearing real bling while they sit there in their plated, plastic baubles that they have to keep re buying cos they don't last! Lol

Ugh, that sucks @House Cat and @Weeivy73 , I'm sorry this happened. I think your reply was perfect @House Cat.

As the saying goes With friends like those one doesn't need enemies