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do girls know anything about diamonds?

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chughes555

Rough_Rock
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Sep 19, 2002
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7
i've been looking at diamonds for about 2 months now. when i started, i just wanted to know how much it's gonna cost me to get married. now, i don't think that i will ever decide on what to buy. there are too many aspects to consider. probably as a result of annonymously reading this forum and following many of the links that get posted, i've become very cut conscious. if my girlfriend was buying a diamond for me on my budget, i would want a hearts on fire dream or flanders cut diamond. the best i've seen that i can afford is a .67 I SI2. but i'm buying it for her. she once mentioned to me that she thought that i should spend about $X on her ring. i just took out a loan for almost twice that, so i don't think that i'll disappoint her. but is she gonna care about all of this 4c stuff and brilliance and firescopes and hearts and arrows and all of that? or, do girls just want big rocks on their fingers?
 

Icom

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jan 5, 2002
Messages
3
As a girl, I prefer in orden of importance:

-Cut
-Color
-Size
-Quality (as long as the quality don't go under S1)

Hope it help. :))
 

BreakerBacker

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 11, 2002
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3
I think you raise a good point. I have often wondered if girls do in fact take anything but sheer size into account. Nicole had told me a while back she didnt care what I spent, so really I had nothing to lose. After about a year of looking and much help from this site, I have decided and it is getting mounted now at DiamondBrokers. Jan, by the way, has been very helpful. Finally the decision was made on a .72, E, SI1, H&A with a score on the HCA of .6! BScope readings are VH2, VH3, VH2! Idealscope also looks great. I went down in clarity, but am fine just so it is eye clean. After asking Jan and then later Chris at AGA (appraiser) this question I know feel comfortable with the decision I have made. It is getting mounted in a platinum DVatche X prong, because this seems a little lower profile than most setttings. It probably wont be as big physically as most of Nicole's friends, but from a distance it should it should hold its own with the excellent cut leading to high light return. Final Price under $4k, 2-3k less than equivelent at our local well respected diamond shop, even less than the mall Signature? stuff!
 

mrmarius

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 15, 2002
Messages
63
Just like the answer to many questions in life, I don't think one can generalize and say that all girls care about is carat weight. It doesn't matter what "girls care about," it matters what YOUR girl cares about!

The only way to know what your girl thinks is important is to ask her.

Some girls want big rocks, some want perfect ones that might not be so big, and some want a balance of both (like mine).
 

diamondjake

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 12, 2002
Messages
10
I am with mrmarius. Try to find what is appropriate for your girl. If she is into large jewelrey, and seems comfortable with it, then size is definitely important. If she just wears a few quality accessories, then she is probably looking for a quality diamond, rather than just a large one.
 

BEDAZZLED

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Sep 8, 2001
Messages
115
Girls opinion...

The more it SPARKLES the better.

1st Color
2nd Clarity
3rd Size

I prefer:

F
VS
1.5 or larger

If your going to invest in something so expensive, do it right the first time.
 

StevL

Brilliant_Rock
Trade
Joined
Dec 31, 1999
Messages
598
Take it for what its worth (not much).

Everyone is different and there is no single answer.

After 32 years of doing this and selling hundreds (maybe thousands) of diamonds, an overwhelming amount of women prefer size.

Please don't get me wrong, there are many that prefer other aspects but the majority still goes back to size.

I guess you need to know your women!
 

caltron

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 8, 2002
Messages
13
Another girl here...

I personally like sparkle, sparkle, sparkle. I would rather have a diamond the size of a pin that sparkles than a big dud.

However, there are some women, especially those that aren't educated about diamonds, who care more about size. And of course, marketing has us all conditioned to want a carat before we even know what we're looking for. You don't have to be completely in the dark however. Here's some things to take into consideration with respect to size:

1. Does your lady wear a lot of jewelry? If she wears none, then more than likely a 2 carat ring would be way to big and she would feel self conscious wearing it. .67 would be perfect in that case.

2. Does your lady have small hands? If her hands are small to medium, then 2/3 carat diamond would look respectably big on her hands.

3. What size rings do her friends wear? If her friends all have one carat or less, then you can rest assured she will be proud of a quality 2/3 carat.

That being said, here's a question for you: Do you think she might like it if you both went and picked a diamond out together? Some women like to chose their own. I personally do, and my fiance was soooo relieved.

At the very least, I'd try to get some clues from your fiance. She's already told you how much to spend, so maybe she'll throw you a bone and give you a hint about the size. Or maybe you could just watch her like a hawk and see how she reacts to other women's rings.

Good luck!
 

chughes555

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 19, 2002
Messages
7
thanks for all the replies so far.

bedazzled, your post raises my main concern. you first say that you like sparkle most of all, but then at the end you say that you prefer 1.5c. who wouldn't agree with that? i guess my major dilema is should i put all of my money into sparkle and in turn get only half the size?

caltron, i've been thinking along those same lines. i know for a fact that she would like to come with me and pick out a ring together. however, the only way that i'm gonna enjoy this process is by picking it out myself and suprising her. that's what makes buying this ring fun for me. also, i am on a very tight budget. i am in school and am borrowing every penny that i will spend on this ring. i'm not sure that she would approve of how much i am going to spend. also, most of her friends, at least the ones that we went to school with, have diamonds that are twice the size of what i'm looking at. however, i will admit that until recently i've never payed any attention whatsoever to how much they sparkle or anything like that. most of the diamonds that i'm looking at have great brilliance, but they're gonna look puny next to her friends'.
 

caltron

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 8, 2002
Messages
13
Well, I'm sure she will love whatever you choose because you have spent so much time thinking about what she would like best. :)

I'm positive you'll find a happy medium between size and quality. I don't think anyone who comes on this board can make a bad decision.
 

mrmarius

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 15, 2002
Messages
63
You could still involve her in the process and also surprise her at the same time. My girlfriend and I have gone looking a couple times, with the understanding the point of our shopping is for me to get a general idea of what she likes. But when it actually comes to to pick out a stone and a setting, she will not be involved in that. This way it preserves some of the suspense while also making sure I don't get her a pear-shape when she really wanted a round.

good luck and have fun (I hope you are having fun!)

Marius
 

bingbongbug

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 20, 2002
Messages
61
Christ amighty...shows you that everything's subjective.

I think a half is a decently sized stone, with 3/4 a nice size, and a carat being big. Anything over that is quite large to me. A three carat would be huge to me, and I'd never wear it due to the "gaudy" factor.

As for what women like, the majority voice here is right. Everything depends on what your girl likes. What she likes is a combination of personal taste, where she lives (some areas like New York, people are incredibly concerned with the size of a diamond, designer names, etc while people in other regions don't care so much for size but for quality), and how materialistic she is. Find out what she likes.
 

fire&ice

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 22, 2002
Messages
7,828
A three carat diamond is only guady if your NOT the one wearing it.:bigsmile: ...but then I am middle aged and can carry it off better than someone younger.

If I were you, I would try to find a balance.

1. buy a well cut stone. You do not have to go ideal - a good to very good stone will suit you fine.

2. go SI in clarity (make sure it is truley represented as such)

3. Go H/I/J in color. Buy a stone with Blue fluor - it will make the stone face up whiter. A stone in the .75 - 1.0 should show no color once set.

that said, you will be buying a very good stone and can afford something larger. No need to go into debt - just an easy way of massaging the parameters. Once set, a well cut stone in this range will deliver a great punch. Most people make the mistake of overbuying on quality.

Friends can be quite cruel about diamonds and engagement rings. Case in point the first comment about my 3 c as being gaudy. I'm not in offense - just pointing out that people feel free to comment on diamonds for some reason.

Also, try visiting your local estate jeweler. Many times secondary market stones will cost less.

Good luck - I'm w/ Steve on this one - when it comes to diamonds size matters.
 

bingbongbug

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 20, 2002
Messages
61
Fire&Ice, I'm sorry if my opinion on stone size seemed cruel to you. It was not my intent to call your jewelry gaudy, as I've never even seen it. I was only pointing out to the original poster that personal tastes vary from one end of the spectrum to the other.

For myself, I am in my mid-twenties, wear a size 3.5, have a very physically active lifestyle, and am in the military racket. Add my personal preference for wearing a few small, tasteful, quality pieces of jewelry, and it equals out to smaller stones being what I like.

A middle-aged woman with bigger hands and a less physical lifestyle could carry off big rocks far better, and would probably have more interest in them.

Also, when most people go big, they go lower in quality to compensate for the cost and it results in a big, unattractive stone. It seems counterintuitive to wear such a stone because the bigness only attracts attention to the ugliness, but once again, that's a preference. (Of course, a pricescope regular wouldn't go that route, knowing what they do about quality.)

After all, jewelry is meant only to be pretty to the owner, no one else. If the wearer is happy, that's what matters. Jewelry is like food, vacations, colors, fashion, and everything else. Tastes run the gamut, and the choice only matters to who owns it.

Moral: Guys, when you buy your girl's ring, get her what -she- wants, not what you want her to have.
 

mbn

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Sep 8, 2001
Messages
212
A 3c would look big on someone in their twenties esp with a 3.5 size finger, young or middle age.

4.5+ size finger can carry off 3c no problem.
 

fire&ice

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 22, 2002
Messages
7,828
----------------
On 9/23/2002 12:30:02 PM


Also, when most people go big, they go lower in quality to compensate for the cost and it results in a big, unattractive stone. It seems counterintuitive to wear such a stone because the bigness only attracts attention to the ugliness, but once again, that's a preference. (Of course, a pricescope regular wouldn't go that route, knowing what they do about quality.)

----------------


No, you are missing my point. Lower quality DOES NOT mean that the stone will be unattractive.

My point to CHughes is simple. Many women prefer big stones, especially since you mention her friends have larger stones. By massaging some parameters you may be able to have the better (note I didn't say best) of two worlds.

A well cut H/I/J color stone w/ SI1 and some blue fluor will be a very good quality stone. If you choose to go that route - you will be able to bump the size up.

That said, only you can determine her tastes. She's the one that has to wear it for a long time. It has been my experience that men tend to be anal retentive about quality and women just want a nice quality stone that is larger.

Good luck....and maybe you can do some sleuthing to see if she has mentioned something to her friends on preference, etc.
 

bingbongbug

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 20, 2002
Messages
61
I wasn't even responding to any point you might have been making. I didn't address the issue of clarity (quality is an overall term, not a synonym for clarity). In fact, I prefer SI stones because I think the inclusions add a little character to the stone. What I said was:

Also notice my comment in parentheses at the end of the comment you quoted. This in fact shows intuitively that my post had nothing to do with your advice in selecting among different diamond parameters.

Meaning that clarity, color, and especially cut tend to suffer for the size of the stone. For the majority of women sporting multi-carat diamonds, the bigger the stone, the more the suffering. The end result is something the color of earwax that returns about as much light as mud would. Just to make sure I'm not understood, I don't mean that all large diamonds are poor quality. Far from it. I'm just talking about the kind of stuff that one tends to see on someone's hand.

That said, back to the thread at hand, hm?


CHughes, the consensus is that you find out your girl's preferences. And that you should probably go with an eyeclean SI stone and a little lower color grade so you can afford a larger stone. However, if you choose to go with a slight flourecense, make sure you take that flourescence into consideration and look at the stone in natural light--full sun and shaded. Flourecense can make your stone dull and dead. I've also heard about some flourecent diamonds looking oily, though I've never seen it.

Find out what she likes and do your diamond research so that you make a purchase you both will always be happy with. This isn't something you want to just do on the fly and regret later.

When you come up with some stones you might buy, you can show the specs here to get very worthwhile advice from pricescope's resident experts. :) (The real experts, not just the overactive novices like myself.)

Keep us posted on your search.
 

mbn

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Sep 8, 2001
Messages
212
I agree with Fire & Ice about H/I/J and SI clarity stone for any stone less than 2 carat. I have a girl friend who has D color and I have 2.16c H color, hers doesn't look any whiter than mine fr. 5 feet apart.

I put H color next to G color, and one can hardly tell. For smaller stones like 1c, I/J is good too.
 

BEDAZZLED

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Sep 8, 2001
Messages
115
These posts are starting to sound like a cat fight...

I am in my mid-30's and would love a 3ct stone, but it would have to be F/G and VS.

This is just my preference as I do not like SI stones or those with a yellow tint on my hand. I probably would never notice it on someone else, unless I examined it. And, how often do you ask someone to take off their ring for your inspection anyway.

Just another point, life is too short and marriage too hard to be caught up in diamond do's and don'ts. Just be happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

fire&ice

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 22, 2002
Messages
7,828
----------------
On 9/25/2002 2:20:37 PM

These posts are starting to sound like a cat fight...

I am in my mid-30's and would love a 3ct stone, but it would have to be F/G and VS.


Just another point, life is too short and marriage too hard to be caught up in diamond do's and don'ts. Just be happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
----------------


Thing is bedazzeled I started my 3c (which initially was 2c) search steadfast on NO lower than G VS2. When I was thinking of going bigger (simply because I didn't want to revisit this again at 60) my jeweler said I should consider an H stone. Without hesitation I said no and bumped up my budget another 5 figures plus. Since my jeweler knew that my enlightenment (one way or another) was only going to come from my experience, he showed me a g and an h. I could not tell the difference. He showed me a few SI's - again no difference except under the scope.

You may think I don't have an eye - I make my living on my eye - judging items of merit for clients w/ an extreme critical eye. I honestly could not see the difference in the stones.

I never even thought about an I color - but when one became available that matched my parameters, my jeweler let me know - plus the price was very appealing - considerablely less than budget. I told him that I was going to have a critical eye as I had seen an "I" color that I saw a tinge of yellow. I was completely blown away when I saw the stone. It has med/strong bl. fluor and faces up every bit white (as white as my F/VS1). The cut hid the flaws - I see nothing w/ my eyes.....and I have this stone set in platinum.

You see, I am NOT defending my stone - rest assured it is not guady. What I am defending is my experience w/ all the stones I looked at and my change of attitude towards buying approach. I had the money to buy a better stone and made a conscious decision not to. What I see with many of these young ones is that they (like hubby & I at that age)have a fairly strict budget - relaxing sterotypical views of a quality stone helps obtain a balance of size w/o noticeable quality sacrifice.

Maybe I was lucky and found a stone that everything just happened to work in life and not just on paper. Who knows....but it's killer.

I'm not going to get into the cat fight bit. I am too secure w/ myself & my selection of stone.
 

mbn

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Sep 8, 2001
Messages
212
I do enjoy reading this post. I think 3c F/G/VS2 w/GIA cert would be very expensive above 30K which is way too much for a diamond to wear on finger, at least for me unless I am rich with spare money to spend.

I finally decide to look for 3c GIA/VS2 stone or SI if jeweller can find it. He quote me H/VS1 3.18c with nice cut for $34K so expensive. I hesitate to go with EGL because I am afraid when I appraise it, grade shall come out differently, I'd be bummed. There is also good chance it shall come out the same grade, but it's a risk whereas most GIA stones appraised for same grade as stated on cert. just for peace of mind.

My 2.16c H/VS1 is very nice stone so I am ok with this no hurry to upgrade unless right stone.
 

StevL

Brilliant_Rock
Trade
Joined
Dec 31, 1999
Messages
598
I have a couple simple questions.

How many times over the years did you see a friend or loved one get engaged and they were showing off there diamond (answer not important)?

Out of these times did you take her hand and give the diamond a look answer again not important)?

Now, how many times did you walk away thinking "my gosh that diamond was yellow, imperfect, or poorly cut" (this is where I was going)?

I would really like everyone to be very honest in their answers.
 

bingbongbug

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 20, 2002
Messages
61
I worked with a girl who got engaged. She wore a small diamond (1/4 or 1/3) that looks like a glass chunk from an old-style glass soda bottle. I know she is happy with it though, so that's what matters.

I see a lot of women's hands at work, and maybe one out of a hundred wears a stone that is actually pretty.

Of course, when expected to give a response on an unattractive stone, I always give the requisite "How pretty, you must be so happy."
 

caltron

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 8, 2002
Messages
13
I can't say that I noticed color, cut and clarity before I knew what they were. However, I have seen friends' stones that left me feeling, well, underwhelmed, regardless of size. I've only seen a few in my lifetime that have really caught my attention. I think different people are just attracted to different things.
 

fire&ice

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 22, 2002
Messages
7,828
----------------
On 9/25/2002 8:41:42 PM

I have a couple simple questions.

How many times over the years did you see a friend or loved one get engaged and they were showing off there diamond (answer not important)?

Out of these times did you take her hand and give the diamond a look answer again not important)?

Now, how many times did you walk away thinking "my gosh that diamond was yellow, imperfect, or poorly cut" (this is where I was going)?

I would really like everyone to be very honest in their answers.
----------------


Steve, you are asking a captive geeky diamond audience. The general public has no idea what they are looking at and mostly relate to size. I make it my business to be quality conscious and I do notice a "good" stone. BUT, I never walk away and think boy is that one nice F VVs stone!

Most of my friends are not as geeky about diamonds as I. The funniest comment so far from one jewelery maven came after much inspection of my stone. She proclaimed "It's flawless"! I knew she meant it as a compliment - so I didn't feel the need to go into the specs. She later asked my friend if that was a D, IF stone. People only react to the "prettyness" of a stone.

..hope all is well w/ your family!
 
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