Complimenting a stranger on her diamond

[Moh 10]

Is it rude?
I have a done this few times, just a brief compliment to a cashier, and the women seem flattered.
I wouldn't actually walk up to a woman to do this.

But I'm wondering if they were just being polite.
Perhaps they'd prefer people not mention it, especially if is a valuable one or in a place she didn't feel too safe.
Plus, I'm a man.

How would you feel if a strange woman complimented your diamond?
How would you feel if a strange man complimented your diamond?

If it depends on the scenario where/when would it be okay or not okay?

 

[atroop711]

I feel flattered when someone compliments my rings...in fact there is this Con Ed (electrical) worker near my house. I've seen him 3 times in the last 9 mo and each time he says NICE RING Mam! I thought it odd that a man commented on my ring (never happened before) but it didn't bother me.

 

[Anastasia]

I''m always baffled as to why people would think it is rude to compliment someone on their ring. I''ve seen the issue addressed before on PS, and I just don''t get it.

Obviously, everyone here has a great love of jewelry. They take care in choosing their diamonds and design of their rings. Why would it be offensive to have someone compliment that? I find it flattering.

I guess if you were in a place where you didn''t feel safe, I could understand it. But under ordinary circumstances, I think it is a compliment.

I have had men (not strange men, but men I knew), compliment some of my jewelry, and I thought it was very nice of them to even notice.

 

[Kaleigh]

You'll like this Moh.

A guy was looking at my RHR, it's an oval diamond with half moon sides. He said nice ring but isn't it on the wrong hand,( he didn't see my left hand. ) I said thanks, but no it's a right hand ring, a 20th anniversary ring from my husband. He said I have never heard of that!!! He walked away very confused... LOL

ETA: to answer the question I never have found it to be rude. Even those that say OMG is that real?? LOL!!

 

[Circe]

I''ve only been bemused one time when the guy at my local comic shop asked me how big mine was and then nodded sagely, saying "Aaaah, 1.5 carats? I would have guessed 1.25 ...." which, I guess, was his attempt to make small talk. But generally I''m flattered and pleased that someone''s taken the time to pay me a compliment.

 

[trillionaire]

I

jewelry compliments!

 

[DiamanteBlu]

I just say "thank you". But, then again, people that have complimented my stones have not been strange - they have seemed pretty normal.

 

[Lilac]

I love getting compliments on my rings. It makes me smile

 

[radiantquest]

I compliment other diamonds and settings often. I also get compliments often. I don''t mind them at all. I appreciate it.

I do think that it makes a difference how you compliment. If you simply say that is a beautiful ring. I think that would be appreciated by anyone. If on the other hand you go on and on, grab the hand and things like that it can make someone uncomfortable.

 

[Tuckins1]

I have had people compliment me, and I am always flattered. I don''t think it''s rude at all. I have also complimented many people on their rings, and they are always gracious about it. I think women like it when others notice their sparklies!

 

[Shopaholic]

I compliment people's rings when I am already communicating with them, for instance a salesperson that is helping me, or the waitress, friends, etc. But I have never just complimented a stranger out of the blue, I think I just don't want them to feel that I have "stalked out their ring" or for them to take it wrong in any way. Almost always when I compliment a woman's e-ring, she will then look at mine or compliment it back, and I don't want them to feel as though I am fishing for compliments, if that makes sense.

I do get compliments from men on my jewelry, mostly my necklaces and second would be earrings. I do occasionally get compliments from men on my e-ring, but they are usually not genuine. There's always an alterior motive to find out my marital status and to get me to talk about my feelings for my husband.....if you get my drift. The only genuine compliments from men on my e-ring that I ever got were from those in the jewelry business. Of course, this is just from my own personal experience.

 

[Haven]

Date: 8/2/2009 7:07:43 PM
Author: Shopaholic
[ . . . ]
I do get compliments from men on my jewelry, mostly my necklaces and second would be earrings. I do occasionally get compliments from men on my e-ring, but they are usually not genuine. There''s always an alterior motive to find out my marital status and to get me to talk about my feelings for my husband.....if you get my drift. The only genuine compliments from men on my e-ring that I ever got were from those in the jewelry business. Of course, this is just from my own personal experience.

Yikes! The upside is that you should *definitely* take it as a compliment that all these men are obviously quite attracted to you. I can''t say this has ever happened to me or anyone I know. If I were getting all that attention I''d be quite pleased with myself.

Moh--To answer your question, I try to graciously accept any compliments that I receive. I usually give an emphatic "Thank you!" and go on my way with a big smile, silently wondering if I just ran into a fellow PSer.

 

[Luckyeshe]

I love getting compliments on my e-ring. I just always say thank you! I give compliments to women all the time for their jewelry. I''ve gotten compliments from guys before but more along the lines of put my rock away, since it''s blinding them.

 

[Lynn B]

I love getting compliments, too; and I am not adverse to complimenting someone if I notice and like their ring(s), either.

I don''t gush toooooooo much

but I do often just say something sincere like, "Beautiful ring!"

 

[MonkeyPie]

Date: 8/2/2009 7:29:45 PM
Author: Haven

Date: 8/2/2009 7:07:43 PM

Author: Shopaholic
[ . . . ]
I do get compliments from men on my jewelry, mostly my necklaces and second would be earrings. I do occasionally get compliments from men on my e-ring, but they are usually not genuine. There''s always an alterior motive to find out my marital status and to get me to talk about my feelings for my husband.....if you get my drift. The only genuine compliments from men on my e-ring that I ever got were from those in the jewelry business. Of course, this is just from my own personal experience.

Yikes! The upside is that you should *definitely* take it as a compliment that all these men are obviously quite attracted to you. I can''t say this has ever happened to me or anyone I know. If I were getting all that attention I''d be quite pleased with myself.

Moh--To answer your question, I try to graciously accept any compliments that I receive. I usually give an emphatic ''Thank you!'' and go on my way with a big smile, silently wondering if I just ran into a fellow PSer.

Shoot, me too! I''d be happy if any guy was hunting that hard for an opening, even if it''s kind of a bad way to go about it.

I love getting compliments, and I accept them graciously. I see no reason to be offended - otherwise why would I even have the thing? I wear it because I like it, it''s pretty, and it has a sentimental value for my marriage.

 

[Shopaholic]

Date: 8/2/2009 8:13:18 PM
Author: MonkeyPie

Date: 8/2/2009 7:29:45 PM
Author: Haven

Date: 8/2/2009 7:07:43 PM

Author: Shopaholic
[ . . . ]
I do get compliments from men on my jewelry, mostly my necklaces and second would be earrings. I do occasionally get compliments from men on my e-ring, but they are usually not genuine. There's always an alterior motive to find out my marital status and to get me to talk about my feelings for my husband.....if you get my drift. The only genuine compliments from men on my e-ring that I ever got were from those in the jewelry business. Of course, this is just from my own personal experience.

Yikes! The upside is that you should *definitely* take it as a compliment that all these men are obviously quite attracted to you. I can't say this has ever happened to me or anyone I know. If I were getting all that attention I'd be quite pleased with myself.

Moh--To answer your question, I try to graciously accept any compliments that I receive. I usually give an emphatic 'Thank you!' and go on my way with a big smile, silently wondering if I just ran into a fellow PSer.

Shoot, me too! I'd be happy if any guy was hunting that hard for an opening, even if it's kind of a bad way to go about it.

I love getting compliments, and I accept them graciously. I see no reason to be offended - otherwise why would I even have the thing? I wear it because I like it, it's pretty, and it has a sentimental value for my marriage.

Haven and MonkeyPie - you guys are such sweeties! Honestly though, that kind of attention is not all that great -quite an annoyance actually. I used to even seriously think about wearing a ring on that finger even when I wasn't engaged or married to avoid the approaches but I now know that it still doesn't work.

 

[elle_chris]

I think it depends on where you're from.

I live in manhattan and if someone random came up to me and complimented my ring, the first thing i'd think of is, uh oh I'm gonna get mugged. So even when I notice someone's ring, necklace or whatever, i won't say anything. I think we're a bit paranoid here and I wouldn't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable.

Oh, and that's exactly how muggings here usually start. "Hey, i like your ring". Followed by "Now give it to me".

 

[Lynn B]

Date: 8/2/2009 8:43:42 PM
Author: elle_chris
I think it depends on where you''re from.


I live in manhattan and if someone random came up to me and complimented my ring, the first thing i''d think of is, uh oh I''m gonna get mugged. So even when I notice someone''s ring, necklace or whatever, i won''t say anything. I think we''re a bit paranoid here and I wouldn''t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable.


Oh, and that''s exactly how muggings here usually start. ''Hey, i like your ring''. Followed by ''Now give it to me''.

EEEK! I would hate that!

I live in a small town and it''s a whole ''nother world here. Our doctors still make house calls, the dry cleaner knows you by name, the rental car people will bring the car to YOU because they know where you live, and by and large the worst crime going on is some graffiti on the park fountain!

 

[Haven]

Shopaholic--You''re too funny. All I''m going to say is you must be one gorgeous lady. I imagine it must get tiring after a while, but I would have *loved* to have your problem when I was single!

 

[Dancing Fire]

a lady almost

when i said " nice cushion" she was in shock that i knew the cut.

 

[strmrdr]

I stopped doing it.
About 50% of the time they were flattered, 25% of the time just looked at me like I was nuts, 25% of the time acted like I was looking to rob them.
btw it is funny the age break down...
Almost always 20s or over 50 flattered.
30s-40s had the highest percentage that acted like I was going to rob them as well as the highest percentage that looked at me like I was nuts.

 

[marcy]

It doesn''t bother me to get compliments and I often comment on someone else''s jewelry.

 

[Rock_of_Love]

I complimented someone the other day, and I''m glad I did...it was an antique "Square Cut"?? I feel like I vaguely remember these from a thread or two here, but maybe some of you antique experts can chime in. It was really beautiful...I thought it was an Asscher at first, but didn''t quite look like one. Anyway, she seemed very proud of it, it was her grandmother''s (or great) and was happy to chat about it!! I was glad to have seen it!!

So, yeah, no problems from me on complimenting a stranger...I actually like to chat up strangers from time to time.

 

[junebug17]

Date: 8/2/2009 8:43:42 PM
Author: elle_chris
I think it depends on where you''re from.

I live in manhattan and if someone random came up to me and complimented my ring, the first thing i''d think of is, uh oh I''m gonna get mugged. So even when I notice someone''s ring, necklace or whatever, i won''t say anything. I think we''re a bit paranoid here and I wouldn''t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable.

Oh, and that''s exactly how muggings here usually start. ''Hey, i like your ring''. Followed by ''Now give it to me''.

You''ve made a very good point elle, it does depend on your location.

I would love to get compliments on my rings! In fact, I''m a little disappointed that nobody has commented on my new wedding set, but maybe people don''t think to compliment old ladies on their rings

And I like to give out compliments, whenever I do the person smiles and seems geniunely flattered.

 

[strmrdr]

I do have a funny story about this...
I was in the doctors office and an older lady sat across from me she had a huge ruby in what looked like silver on her right hand.
She saw me look at it and I said nice ruby and she took it off and handed it to me.
Another lady who was there who neither of us knew started having a fit and saying you better give that expensive ring back to her!
The lady and I just looked at her and went back to looking at it and talking.
Turns out it was a gift from her 10 year old grandson and he bought it with his own money and she was showing it to everyone.
Absolutely priceless but not very valuable.

 

[marcy]

Date: 8/2/2009 10:06:44 PM
Author: strmrdr
I do have a funny story about this...
I was in the doctors office and an older lady sat across from me she had a huge ruby in what looked like silver on her right hand.
She saw me look at it and I said nice ruby and she took it off and handed it to me.
Another lady who was there who neither of us knew started having a fit and saying you better give that expensive ring back to her!
The lady and I just looked at her and went back to looking at it and talking.
Turns out it was a gift from her 10 year old grandson and he bought it with his own money and she was showing it to everyone.
Absolutely priceless but not very valuable.

That is too funny. Some people are a little to tense.

 

[lovewhitediamonds]

I LOVE compliments -- but rarely get them.... only in a jewelry store most of the people I know don''t know what an "asscher" cut is.

...still thinking about another upgrade at some point!

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Men have complimented me on my ring and it is surprising to me that they would even notice. The last time it occured, the GF directed the initial attention to my ring and the man seem "mortified" lest he should have to compete! I laughed.....

cheers--Sharon

 

[ladyciel]

Thinking back, if I exclude family/friends/jewelers, I think I''ve had more men compliment me on my diamond than women. None of them were strange about it, and their comments made me smile. For the most part it''s been when I''m out shopping and the comment comes from the person behind the counter. The vast majority of them say something about how big/sparkly it is and must be new. Some even ask how long until the wedding. I remember one time in particular, at the UPS store, the guy seemed surprised when I replied that I''d been married 6 months already - he took another look and said "oh yeah, I guess there IS a wedding band hiding back there!". My rock must block the view from that angle.

The only 2 scenarios I can think of where a compliment would put me off would be 1) if I didn''t feel safe in the area/around the person, or 2) it was obvious the person was sizing up my wealth, perhaps in hopes of a big theft/sale/tip. I''ve heard of cases of the latter with brides going wedding dress shopping and the shop ladies sizing up their diamonds looking for a big sale. I might be overly sensitive to #2 because in all honesty my ring is above and beyond what our current circumstance would normally allow (we''re grad students).

 

[Amethyste]

I have complimented many women about their engagement ring or other pieces of jewelry. I really appreciate when strangers comment on my engagement ring, but I really dislike when they grab my hand to look at it and then putting their greasy fingers all over the stone... I cringe internally while smiling and saying "Thank you so much". lol. I am a freak.