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Can I trade in my diamond?

marie82

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 10, 2011
Messages
4
I'm really hoping somewhere out there can help me! My FI picked out my ring on his own, but he knew a lot about what I wanted. And he did a great job picking a ring that ticked all the boxes on my list (split shank, halo, princess cut). It is a really beautiful ring... unfortunately, I have somewhat fallen out of love with the stone. At first, I was so excited just to be engaged and I loved the princess cut stone! But as time went on, I started to dislike the sharp edges and now I am really coveting a cushion cut stone. The 90 day return policy on my ring is now expired and the store will only let me trade the diamond in for one that is double the price. Is there anything I can do, or am I stuck with a ring that I like but no longer love? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
 

yennyfire

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
Jun 6, 2010
Messages
6,585
It sounds like you're fairly stuck in terms of the store where FI purchased it. Are you wanting to keep the setting and put a cushion in it or replace the whole thing?
 

Lula

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 5, 2009
Messages
4,545
Yes, it should be possible to work out a trade-in with the jeweler you bought it from, but you will be lucky to accomplish that goal for double what you paid, because you will likely have to get a new setting, too, not just a new stone. It is possible that your jeweler can put a cushion-cut in a setting that holds a princess cut. But will you be happy with a cushion-cut diamond in your current setting? And it may be difficult to find a nice cushion cut stone (depending on your jeweler's ability to source diamonds) in the exact dimensions of your current setting. Again, I'm not sure how much wiggle room there is in your current setting, or if you even want to keep your current setting.

Cushion-cut diamonds seem to be gaining in popularity, but there are a lot of unattractive cushion-cut stones out there (a woman I work with has one, purchased at Jared's). Before you embark on the stressful and expensive trade-in process (I'm not going to gloss over this -- it is expensive and time-consuming), make sure that your jeweler is able to source decent cushion-cut diamonds. Keep in mind, too, that diamond prices have increased since your ring was purchased, so spending double what you spent on your princess cut may not get you as much today as it would have even a month or two ago.

If spending twice as much on the new stone as you did on your original stone is not in your budget, you could consider selling your current ring (be prepared to feel lucky if you get half of what you paid) and put the proceeds from that sale plus additional money into a new stone and setting (assuming you cannot or do not want to use your current setting for your new stone).

I know I sound like a Debbie Downer, but I've been down the trade-in road several times, and it always costs more and takes longer than you think it will, so please take the time to make sure this is really a trade-in you want to make. Also consider that your fiance's feelings may be hurt, if you do decide to trade in your current ring for something new.

You could keep this ring -- and make a promise to yourself to stop looking at websites like this, and stay out of jewelry stores, too -- for several years and upgrade to a cushion (if you still want one-- fashions and tastes change over time) for an anniversary.
 

dreamer_dachsie

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 16, 2007
Messages
24,364
Keep your ring and buy a small cushion cut from another vendor to enjoy! It will save you money I am sure.
 

farmer gal

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 26, 2011
Messages
1,063
My biggest concern would be you fiance's feelings will be hurt with the trade in. He may say it doesn't bother him, but this is a sticky situation where you may cause some resentment by doing so. You gave him a list of what you wanted and he probably spent a lot of time and worry to make sure he got you something you would love, and he may feel now like that wasn't good enough. If it were me I would stick with what you have and love it because it was a gift from him that he probably put a lot of effort into. You don't want to start an engagement off with hurt feelings.

I think if it were me I would work on a right hand ring with a cushion cut gemstone, your birthstone or what ever one you love, mine for example is a sapphire.

Not this particular one but something like this
http://cgi.ebay.com/SAPPHIRE-DIAMOND-VINTAGE-RING-18KT-WHITE-GOLD-/180689683249?pt=US_Fine_Rings&hash=item2a11f1c331

If you were interested in something like this I would contact ID jewelry they make beautiful pieces for really reasonable prices.

www.idjewelryonline.com
 

luckky

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Feb 20, 2011
Messages
193
farmer gal|1310319402|2965976 said:
My biggest concern would be you fiance's feelings will be hurt with the trade in. He may say it doesn't bother him, but this is a sticky situation where you may cause some resentment by doing so. You gave him a list of what you wanted and he probably spent a lot of time and worry to make sure he got you something you would love, and he may feel now like that wasn't good enough. If it were me I would stick with what you have and love it because it was a gift from him that he probably put a lot of effort into. You don't want to start an engagement off with hurt feelings.

I think if it were me I would work on a right hand ring with a cushion cut gemstone, your birthstone or what ever one you love, mine for example is a sapphire.

Not this particular one but something like this
http://cgi.ebay.com/SAPPHIRE-DIAMOND-VINTAGE-RING-18KT-WHITE-GOLD-/180689683249?pt=US_Fine_Rings&hash=item2a11f1c331

If you were interested in something like this I would contact ID jewelry they make beautiful pieces for really reasonable prices.

www.idjewelryonline.com
Ditto...I couldn't agree more with FG. or you have to wait till the time come for an upgrade. Good luck
 

donblaximus

Rough_Rock
Joined
Apr 13, 2011
Messages
13
As a male on here searching for help to buy my fiance's ring, I am face palming right now reading what you are thinking.

First you tell the guy what you want, then he goes through painstaken efforts to get exactly that.....now you want to change it?

Seems what you need to change is your attitude and not the ring. What ever happened to "the ring is a symbol of our love, who cares how big or small it is blah blah blah"

The only thing I know about my fiance's ring is that it will be an RB because I remember her mentioning how much she loves round diamonds. We never discussed it, she never told me what to buy, in fact she doesnt even know I am going to propose.

If she traded in the ring I got her after 90 days, then I would be upset but not because of the fact that she changed her mind, but because how materialistic she was being.
 

marcy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 27, 2007
Messages
24,128
I would keep it and love it for what it means to your fiancé. If you can afford a cushion get one as a RHR. if not save it for an upgrade in the future when you both think it's right.
 

Christina...

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 7, 2011
Messages
5,028
marcy|1310343847|2966137 said:
I would keep it and love it for what it means to your fiancé. If you can afford a cushion get one as a RHR. if not save it for an upgrade in the future when you both think it's right.

+1
It sounds like your fiance got you everything you thought that you wanted, how do you know that you won't fall out of love with a cushion cut 2 months after you get. I think that there is a risk with any fancy cut stone, princess cut remained poplular for many years and now it seems like people are falling for cushions and other antique cuts. I think that it's important to remember that styles are always going to change but the love you have for each other, and what the ring represents will always stay the same.

We are all diamond and jewlery enthusiasts and can relate to wanting something 'bigger, better, different' than what we have and many of us upgrade our e-rings at some point and oftern have other projects in the works, but in my opinion, it is much too soon for you to trade in your diamond without hurting your fiance feelings. If it were me I think that I would instead start thinking and looking for the amazing wedding band to match that gorgeous e-ring of yours. Perhaps when you start seeing other rings (eternity, maybe a nice stack) with your e-ring, you will start seeing it in a new and fabulous light!

Edit: Just wanted to add that I read your post to my hubby to be and asked how he would feel if I proposed the same idea to him and he replied...."That more important than any ring he put on my finger is my happiness, and that if I didn't love the ring, than he would want me to exchanged it for the stone of my dreams." (see why I'm marrying him??!! :love: ) However, he also thought that you should reflect on your personality in general, if you frequently are falling in and out of love with other things in your life, than this could potentially mean that no matter what stone you end up choosing, down the road you won't be happy again!
 

marie82

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 10, 2011
Messages
4
Thank you all for your advice! Most of your advice was very helpful and clearly came from a place of wanting to help... I really appreciate it. I would like to clarify a little about my situation. I actually know very little about diamonds... this is my first time on this site. Before I got engaged, I saw and loved the Tiffany legacy ring, but knowing nothing about diamond cuts, I just thought it was "square" and explained it to my fiance that way. I didn't realize until after I was engaged the difference between princess and cushion cut. My hesitation about the ring has nothing to do with size. In fact, I would be ok if the ring was a bit smaller (not so tall). It is an extremely beautiful ring and my amazing fiance worked very hard to pick it out! Trust me when I say that I am very aware of his feelings in this matter. I have never even mentioned my feelings to him... not because he will be hurt but because I think it may not be possible to change the diamond right now and he would be very upset to think that I do not have the most perfect ring for me. I certainly wish I would have thought about all of this before the 90 day return period had expired, but I was just so happy to be engaged and awed by that sparkle of my ring! I'm sure some of you can relate to that! But I still love the ring and know that I'm very lucky to have it! I think I just have to stop expecting it to be "perfect."

My plan right now is to keep the ring, as is, and try to find a wedding band that I love. Actually, I think what pushed me to post here yesterday was that I have been having a very hard time finding a wedding band that fits with my split-shank ring and doesn't look way too flashy. At this point, I'm thinking about getting a band that I can wear without my e-ring so I can alternate the two. B/c my ring has a split shank, it kind of looks like a wedding ring already. I wonder if anyone else on here has a band separate from their e-ring? Also, I like the idea of a cushion cut RHR down the road... thanks for that great idea!
 

marcy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 27, 2007
Messages
24,128
farmer gal|1310354935|2966230 said:
If you have a camera available I would love to see some pictures :twirl:
Me too.
 

mrsjacob

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jul 9, 2011
Messages
125
Don't feel too bad about ring indecisiveness. I had 4 different rings during the 12 months that we were engaged. I picked them all out, and every time I thought "This is the one!", but a couple months afterward, I would think they were hideous.

I told my husband "I can commit to one man for the rest of my life, no problem. Committing to one ring, however, seems to be giving me some trouble."

I think my main issue was stress from wedding planning. I would get so nervous about all those people looking at my ring, and it would make it suddenly seem inadequate.

Hubs was extremely understanding, thank goodness. He knows I'm crazy.
 

Laila619

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 28, 2008
Messages
11,614
mrsjacob|1310486876|2967305 said:
Don't feel too bad about ring indecisiveness. I had 4 different rings during the 12 months that we were engaged. I picked them all out, and every time I thought "This is the one!", but a couple months afterward, I would think they were hideous.

I told my husband "I can commit to one man for the rest of my life, no problem. Committing to one ring, however, seems to be giving me some trouble."
LOL, I too changed my setting 4 times during our 5 month engagement. I was worried hub would start to think I was bonkers. :lol:
 

Christina...

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 7, 2011
Messages
5,028
Laila619|1310488187|2967324 said:
mrsjacob|1310486876|2967305 said:
Don't feel too bad about ring indecisiveness. I had 4 different rings during the 12 months that we were engaged. I picked them all out, and every time I thought "This is the one!", but a couple months afterward, I would think they were hideous.

I told my husband "I can commit to one man for the rest of my life, no problem. Committing to one ring, however, seems to be giving me some trouble."
LOL, I too changed my setting 4 times during our 5 month engagement. I was worried hub would start to think I was bonkers. :lol:

I'm on my third setting as well! :rolleyes: Happy to say though I am very satified now....I think! :Up_to_something:
 

Christina...

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 7, 2011
Messages
5,028
There are actually alot of PSers that wear bands without their e-rings. Many have eternity bands that they wear all the time and only wear the e-rings when they want to dress it up a bit, and several have 2 or 3 different bands that they wear with or without their e-ring. A girl can never have too many you know :naughty: People are always posting about having a hard time finding a wedder that they really adore with their ring, and I think it's sorta like finding your perfect wedding dress....when you see it, you know it's the one! Maybe you should consider a beautiful eternity for now and then keep looking for the perfect ring, even if you don't find it until after the wedding, you said that the split shanks sort of looks like you have a wedder on anyway, maybe pair if with a plain gold band? or two delicate eternity rings on either side? so many options!! I would love to see pictures of your ring too!! It sounds beautiful! :love:
 

marie82

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 10, 2011
Messages
4
I hope this works but its my first time posting a pic on this site. Its not the best pic because I took it with my cell phone but you can probably get an idea. Here goes nothing!


Also, please ignore the fact that the pic was taken in my bathroom... it was nighttime and the bathroom has the best light! ;-)

2010-08-01 15.05.56.jpg
 

Amys Bling

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jun 25, 2010
Messages
11,025
Your ring is stunning!! I would rock it and plan acushion cut RHR in the future-
Maybe a special anniversary?? :naughty:
 

lknvrb4

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 1, 2009
Messages
3,737
It is a very pretty ring, I would probably not wear a wedding band with it because it stands out on its own. Perhaps get a wband for a rhr?
 

hoofbeats95

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 23, 2008
Messages
1,442
GORGEOUS!!!!

I technically had 4 engagement rings before I walked down the aisle. It's tough being so indecisive. I panic over the thought of wearing the SAME ring every day for the rest of my life. lol. I like change.
 

marie82

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 10, 2011
Messages
4
Thanks everyone! And thank you especially to the women who said they also had a hard time committing to a ring. The fact that I will be wearing this every day for the rest of my life definitely makes the decision more difficult! Like another writer said, it was WAY easier committing to my FI than to the ring! I feel much better after bouncing the thing off of you all though, so thank you!
 

marcy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 27, 2007
Messages
24,128
Your ring is gorgeous!
 

Natylad

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Nov 17, 2009
Messages
2,399
This is coming from a person who upgraded her ER twice during her 12 month engagement and after one year of marriage is already contemplating a reset: Your ring is A.B.S.O.L.U.T.E.L.Y. G.O.R.G.E.O.U.S. :love: :love: :love: Seriously, i am very picky but i wouldn't change anything about it. Keep your ring ;))
 
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